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Sun December 28, 2008
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Before heading to the airport to catch an international flight, make sure the airline hasn't gone bankrupt three months beforehand. Especially if you're flying from Darwin
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Teenage couple caught having sex on middle school sports field, face jail sentences and lifelong registration as sex offenders. Just kidding - it wasn't the puritan U.S., so they were let off without charges
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(174)
 
(Panama City News Herald)
 
 
 
Woman challenges police officer to "tase me in the face." Hilarity ensues
source: newsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Fortune)
 
Plug
 
Fortune 500: 20 companies that lost the most (Featured Partner)
 
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
What's smoky and 1,286 feet long? Poland sausage party
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Sound and Motion)
 
 
 
Child's birth defects may have been caused by mom's botox. Hard to tell whether mother is upset, angry, or indifferent to the whole thing
source: livenews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(CBS4.com)
 
 
 
Remember those special times, fishing with your dad in the backyard, catching fresh catfish, blue gills, human skulls
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Two pilots forget to check the rear view mirror
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Man finds a room to live in, and it's furnished. By "a room to live in" we mean an unsuspecting family's attic. By " furnished" we mean he's wearing their clothes
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(WTFark)
 
Plug
 
PLASTIC POPO: DOLL COP - Small Oklahoma Town Fights Crime With Weird Makeout Doll Cop Thing
 
 
(Sound and Motion)
 
 
 
$100,000 worth of nuts stolen. Police on lookout for very thirsty thieves
source: livenews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Knock, knock. Who's there? Owen. Owen who? Owen Sixteen
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
It's an outrage that luminaries such as the real-life Boobarella, the guy that created the Chicken Dance song, and Killer Kowalski didn't get the same send off as Carlin, Ledger, and Russert. Cracked is here to remedy that
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(strategy page)
 
 
 
Iraqis believe that American troops wear sunglasses that see through clothing, body armor that is air conditioned, and that American military bases are protected by force fields. Apparently they haven't learned about other uses for tinfoil
source: strategypage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(196)
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
Anchorage Daily News now has a site tracking the epic conflict between Snowzilla and his snowman minions and city hall
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Alaska Report)
 
 
 
Sarah Palin calls PETA and asks then to pull an online game where people can throw snowballs at her. "Just take the game down or you'll read my name on the lawsuit."
source: alaskareport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(324)
 
(Some Maze)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man escaping a rubber labyrinth
source: college.holycross.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(KOTV)
 
 
 
New law mandates testing of all imported toys for toxins, but exempts domestic made ones. Happy Fun Ball bounces in approval
source: newson6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Another actual San Francisco Chronicle headline, Obama taps California's political talent. In-your-end-o innuendo trifecta in play
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Rising number of costumed superheroes patrolling the streets of America's cities to fight crime. "This is a more serious business than it looks," says one calling himself Citizen Prime
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Daily Camera)
 
 
 
John Mark Karr, one-time JonBenet Ramsey murder suspect, has apparently fled the country and is allegedly taunting investigators with emails about the crime
source: dailycamera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Nanny State threatens to fine anyone caught making noise on New Year's Eve, as well as seizing their stereos, TVs and DVDs. We'd give the Brits a golf clap, but that's probably illegal too
source: thepress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Fifty years after the revolution, Cubans like their life--at least the ones the reporter was allowed to interview do--because its current crappiness is better than the crappiness under Batista
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Actual San Francisco Chronicle headline:"No more 'Exit Only' confusion"
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Mike Hunt found dead in Indianapolis (w/ pic)
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(241)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Survey finds the biggest news story of 2008 was the death of Heath Ledger, in latest proof of why you don't let the masses vote on what's news
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(WIVB)
 
 
 
60 degrees in December in Buffalo? A week after a major snowstorm? What could possibly go wrong?
source: wivb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
What do you do when your elite toll lanes are not being used to bypass traffic? Raise the tolls and make it TotalElite®
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The latest victim of "No Child Left Behind": Spring break
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Native species in 'biodiversity freefall,' claim environmentalists. Today it is hedgehogs and dormice, tomorrow it will be squirrels... regardless of nutsize
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Further proof that eBay has everything: a pocket-sized vampire hunting kit
source: geekologie.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
If you have misplaced your 850 pound, $370M emerald, the LA county sheriff's department has some good news for you
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pilot admits to napping in cockpit during flight. Hopefully he didn't use one of those blankets, those things are FILLED with germs
source: kfbk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Federal judge rules that Louisiana must list both gay California Fathers on baby's birth certificate. This should end well
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(278)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
"Organizers strip Mexican beauty queen..." The article starts with a promising headline, and delivers pics. What more could a Farker want?
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Scotland wants to reintroduce moose, wolves, and bears to the countryside. What could possibly go wrong?
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
What does it take to be the most popular person in Russian history? How about killing millions of people, creating a dictatorial police state, and starting the Cold War. Hey, it worked for Uncle Joe
source: fe20.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this training exercise
source: army.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Some Girl)
 
 
 
Two 21 year old women grab their bicycles and camera and take a 2,500 mile trip around the United States. In 1944. But I'm sure your summer playing with your Wii was as tough and rewarding
source: mjgradziel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Alternative medicine practitioners, soothsayers, astrologers and general assorted nutbags claim that town's new free wi-fi system is giving them pneumonia. That's ray-cist
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Girl trapped in pizza dough machine rushed to hospital. Doctors promise to save her in thirty minutes or less or it's free
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Father gets 'taken by shark' / Quotes sound like journalists' snark / I thought they meant 'smitten' / Instead they meant 'bitten' / And that's why it's not news, it's Fark
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Dispatch)
 
 
 
Archaeologists find small Swiss watch in "undisturbed" 400-year old Chinese tomb, puzzled by letters 'M-C-F-L-Y' carved on back
source: dispatch.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
The Australian government wants to ban booze in toothpaste tubes and cocktail towers (bonus game: do you need beer goggles for the bartender in the picture?)
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Sound and Motion)
 
 
 
That knocking sound your car's been making the last ten days? Might just be a nurse in the boot
source: livenews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Goldfish survives 13-hour out-of-fishbowl experience after leaping out. "It was a real Christmas miracle." (The owner said that, not the fish)
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
They like their women stupid and unable to walk: In addition to denying females an education, the Taliban also prohibit polio vaccines
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
If you get caught speeding and the cop gives you a ticket, he's probably gonna catch you when you go to his house and torch his pickup truck as well
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Prince Edward accused of hitting a dog in welcome break from usual stories about Prince Charles banging a horse
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
36/F/Shibuya Train Overpass
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
The economic downturn is forcing more and more parents to pull their kids out of daycare and figure out how to raise the brats themselves
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(182)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this outdoor door
source: i125.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 


Sat December 27, 2008
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
"While not the oddest fetish in Japan by a long way, there are some who travel the length of Japan enticed by the prospect of a compellingly designed manhole"
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Why chili con carne is almost a religion in some parts of the world." Even in parts where the savages don't know enough to put beans in it
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(278)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Tracking #: 1Z9982615F2, delivered. Signed by: Terrorist
source: turnto23.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
In latest sign that the Apocalypse is all but upon us, disco is back
source: women.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(219)
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Even with all the progress in the world, there are still a few anti-dentites out there
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
20-year old woman who had never been kissed picks a random 17-year old kid to be her first at a public kissing seminar held in Times Square
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(204)
 
(Some Litterbug)
 
 
 
Workers remove 4.5 million pounds of trash from North Carolina's roadways. To put that in perspective, that equals roughly 200 million cigarette butts, 90 million soda bottles, or 32,000 dead hookers
source: citizen-times.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Every Christmas Swedes build a giant straw goat and protect it using fireproofing chemicals, security guards and a web camera. Every year vandals burn it down
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
New Year's can mean only one thing: it's time for Dave Barry's 2008 in review
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Family has been struggling since their son was hit by a falling speaker; their problems continue to amplify
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
U of Saskatchewan student completing PhD in how to save beer from going bad
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
U.S., Georgia to sign strategic pact to help Georgia advance security, democratic, and market economic reforms. Alabama heartbroken
source: blog.wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(HelenaIR.com)
 
 
 
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house / My roommate was stirring up sh*t like a louse / When, what in my rupturing eye should appear / But a sharp paring knife bringing holiday cheer
source: helenair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: A celebrity walks into a transmogrifier. LGT transmogrifier
source: satyakomatineni.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
They fight in neighborhoods they describe as being like "a mouthful of broken teeth". Calling themselves "urban warriors," they face a landscape that grows more treacherous each day
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(310)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark's 2008 Headline of the Year contest, Round 2: April through June (details in thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(The Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
Local media goes crazy over missing teenage girl. Fark: she's not white
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Restaurant refuses to serve alcohol to woman who can't prove her age. Although she's 60 years old
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(366)
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
North Carolina prepares inmates for life after prison. If, of course, that life entails working in a Jordanian sweatshop
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dirty hand
source: farm4.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
iPod helps iSwiss rescue iDiots lost on really big iMountain
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
New Zealand Web site looks back at the stupid criminals who gave them so many lovely Fark headlines this year
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
If you claim to be a veteran collecting holiday donations for military families, be careful not to run into any real veterans. And try to get your rank and uniform right, too, dumbass
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
15% rise in UK personal name changes, including Happy Adjustable Spanners, General Ninja Ant, and N'Tom The Haymaker Haywardyou-liketocomebacktomine. Raymond Luxury Yacht unimpressed
source: women.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Jewish guy saves Christmas. Again
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
NYC man sells bubbly calendars for folks who like to pop the little bubbles in bubble-wrap, which is just about everyone in the entire world
source: fe17.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
After man nabbed trying to smuggle out a mummified cat, let us paws for a moment and honor the originators of Caturday, the ancient Egyptians
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(373)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Israel faithfully celebrates one of their lesser-known holidays, "Bomb the crap out of Palestine" which officially falls between Christmas and New Years but can really be celebrated whenever the mood strikes
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1026)
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Community leaders in Denver fail to raise money for inner city gun "buy back" effort, instead ask hoods to simply turn the pieces in "for morality's sake"
source: cbs4denver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
"If I pour gasoline on my arm and light it on fire, she's *sure* to notice me."
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(My Eyewitness News)
 
 
 
Not news: Burglar steals $36 worth of cigarettes from convenience store. Fark: Burglar returns to scene seeking medical help after severely cutting himself on the glass door he shattered during robbery
source: myeyewitnessnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Nanny State wants to give websites age-ratings
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shooter's sphere
source: img88.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Power failure hits Oahu. Pray for Obamarion
source: starbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Big Duke is the world's tallest horse at six feet seven inches at the shoulders and may take a fence and stirrup some trouble if you tell him he sucks
source: mailonsunday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Halifax Courier)
 
 
 
Man found taking shower in women's changing room at public swimming pool : "It was a genuine error"
source: halifaxcourier.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Jumbo snowglobes + sunlight = DIAF
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
You know those people who talk during movies? Yeah, I hate them too
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(270)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Sheriff Joe getting a Fox reality show to bust criminals. Think "To Catch A Predator", but with pink underwear at 110 degrees
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree, Oh please don't kill me
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Town fires a 50-year veteran police chief to avoid tax increase. Elderly residents up in arm.......ZzZzZzZz
source: cumberlink.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Study finds that in the first 3 years after the U.S. invasion, 151,000 Iraqis died
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(384)
 


Fri December 26, 2008
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this crimson crisscross
source: photolucida.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Virgin Mary married to a carpenter gives birth to baby Jesus on Christmas. Aw geez, not this shiat again
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Women shouldn't say "I love you" first because only men should have to find out the person they spilled their soul to just wants to be friends
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(544)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Man shot in the buttocks after refusing to give his beer to muggers. Must have been a Guinness
source: www3.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
The coolest picture of a ten foot long three hundred pound white alligator living near a Florida mall you will see this year
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pint of beer raises cancer risk by fifth, and a fifth a whole lot more
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
GateHouse Media Inc. files suit against the New York Times for its practice of grabbing headlines from its newspapers web sites. New York Times claims they submit them with better headline
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Montgomery Advertiser)
 
 
 
Man who gets no presents sets (you guessed it) mobile home on fire
source: montgomeryadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Nothing captures the holiday spirit like getting arrested on Christmas eve, then again Christmas morning. With mugshot goodness of both
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Can't agree on what song to sing on karaoke night? Thats a stabbin
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
From the "how dumb do you have to be to think this would actually work?" department: missing mohawk baby was made up by woman to win back ex
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Aftershock from 1727 earthquake hits New Hampshire. Things move slowly in these parts you know
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(KTLA-5)
 
 
 
L.A.'s Killer Claus was a laid-off aerospace engineer who lost house & dog in divorce, booby-trapped his car & jerry-rigged a flamethrower. D-Fens approves
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(610)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Ten cars and the type of women they attract
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(327)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
After trying to outrun police, handcuffed driver tells them that he "Had better things to do than sitting on the side of the road talking to you." Police disagreed
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
China reminds us they have ninjas, too
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Well, with Christmas behind us, time to start preparing for Valentine's Day
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark's 2008 Headline of the Year contest, Round 1: January through March (details in thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(BDCwire)
 
 
 
Scarface's home on Chicago's southside is going up for sale. Price expected to be driven up by Geraldo who wants access to the attic and basement for live TV special
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Some Ghost of Xmas Future)
 
 
 
♬ Christmas, Christmas time is near, time for a Corpse, and time for beer ♬
source: corpse.elchode.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Getting lost is one thing, but it takes a special kind of stupid to end up on an airport runway
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man makes late entry in Dumbass of the Year contest
source: sj-r.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
70-year-old achieves his life's ambition - to paint himself into a famous Rembrandt painting
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
The seven best capers of 2008
source: blog.wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Man gets paid to drink beer at work. Now hopes to set up Web site where people pay $5 a month to watch him drink. Unless someone else has beaten him to it
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Little old lady requests disaster relief for flooded house, gets a fishy estimate, uses bookkeeping/contracting background and FOIA requests to uncover massive contractor fraud. Her house? Still not repaired, six years later
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
New franchise provides drivers, using foldup scooters, to take drunks home in their own cars
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Iowa City considers banning happy hour
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(PhysOrg.com)
 
 
 
Japan to go ahead with maglev train even though the economic crisis has polarized its supporters
source: physorg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Some forked tongue)
 
 
 
Judge rules government cannot take back beads and blankets from Native Americans. Suck it, paleface
source: newswatch50.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
([LA Weekly])
 
 
 
[☻] [☻] [☻] [☺] [☻] [☻] [☻]
source: blogs.laweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Guy surprised to find journalism degree, air guitar skills don't lead to success
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Mobile phone seizure an 'abuse of police powers', thought Blackberry was a donut
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a picture of an ox with a mouse on its head
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Pakistan moving 20,000 troops to Indian border and has recalled soldiers on leave in major escalation. What could possibly go wrong?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(244)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
232 years ago: Washington crossed the Delaware in horrible weather. Present: Sissy re-enactors have to use a foot bridge. Hero tag is for the General
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The newest way your personal info can be obtained by others? How about by being the highest bidder from a self storage auction?
source: pressherald.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Happy 23rd birthday, you gorgeous bastard
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: how you would have done the Presidential Portrait
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The war on terror is being won not with a bang, but a boner
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(Arkansas Times)
 
 
 
You're an energy company. How can you keep cities from using more efficient lighting? Charge double for the electricity used in the efficient lights. Monty Burns reportedly proud
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(136)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop your predictions for 2009
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(59)
 


Thu December 25, 2008
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Only 3 percent of kids' meals from fast-food restaurants meet federal recommendations for nutrition. Ric Romero with film at 11
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Homelessness in New York City has hit a record high, and it may be premature, but what the hell... EVERYBODY PANIC
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(KFWB News 980)
 
 
 
Mother of the year comforts 12-year-old son after relationship break up by stabbing his son's ex-lover's mother. In other news 12-year-olds have relationships
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(52)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Teen petitions to put Festivus pole in Illinois state capitol building. Fark: The request is approved, and the nativity scene people are a bit peeved
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(125)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
In step #1,372 of the never-ending plan to destroy Christmas, a woman is fired from her cashier's job at Lowe's for wearing a pin saying "It's called Christmas for Christ's sake"
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(321)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shy guy
source: photos-e.ak.fbcdn.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(International Herald Tribune)
 
 
 
"Santa Baby, won't you carry me to heaven tonight, alright?" Eartha Kitt dies at 81
source: iht.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Humans have a very highly evolved tendency for lying, cheating and deceit. You submitted this with a funnier headline, but I promised Drew a keg of Heineken if he greened this one
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Great Falls Trrrribune)
 
 
 
For the second time in five days, fireman rescue dog from icy river in Great Falls, MT. This pup ups the ante by jumping off a 60-foot-high bridge to get there, but really, you'd do the same if you were in Great Falls in December
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Top ten cheeses of 2008. Behold the power of top ten lists
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Festivus for the rest of us, plus Wil Wheaton
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
A look inside the room your dog wants more than anything in the known universe: the steak vault at Peter Luger's
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Elderly Ninjas are on the prowl on Japan's northern island of Hokkaido. Where are the Somali pirates when you need them?
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(46)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Last mugshot round-up for the year, and in the spirit of the season the second one: Red? Check... Beard? Check mate
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Black Friday. New Hotness: New Black Friday
source: biz.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(The Sun Herald)
 
 
 
Couple arrested for having garage sale. "Oh? We really needed to own the home and all the items?"
source: sunherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Headline: "Pope greets Christmas with appeal for abused kids." The Church needs more?
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(CBS4.com)
 
 
 
Foot tall baby with mohawk and tattoo missing, last seen with a woman with a french accent
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
His reign as hot dog king over, Takeru Kobayashi is eyeing a new Coney Island conquest: fruitcakes -- not that there's anything wrong with that
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
In case you need a reason to tell your kids why Santa didn't come, "He shot three people in L.A." will do the trick
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(83)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Nanny State bans shopkeepers from giving mulled wine to their customers during traditional late-night shopping event. Merry farking Christmas to you, too, Nanny
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ring thing
source: photolucida.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Soccer moms scrap-booking in the dining room. New Darwiny Hotness: Soccer moms doing genetic engineering in the dining room
source: fe30.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Time to reflect on the greatness of the Star Wars Holiday Special
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Newton TAB)
 
 
 
Police wait patiently as suicidal man repeatedly tries to light his house on fire but can't figure out how to work a match
source: wickedlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Merry Christmas... hot 23 year old physical trainer puts new meaning in the nickname of the Tustin High Tillers. With "Oh hell yeah" hittable pic
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(169)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Guy makes late run at Douchebag of the Year status: "All I wanted was this phone back. I am a decent guy. ... It's girls like this I fight against in the work that I do"
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Here's your chance to pick up a used Soviet missile submarine on the cheap. Low miles, needs some work
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Once a year, mild-mannered mail carrier Scott Arnold turns into Santa Paws and brings presents for all the doggies on his route
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Update from the front lines: the War on Christmas is losing ground, in spite of what you've heard on talk radio
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Mrs. Charles Darwin's Recipe Book to be published. Step 1: marinate your dodo for at least 12 hours
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Merry Christmas, Fark! And Happy Boxing Eve to you, Canada. Or something
source: images.teamsugar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(196)
 
(Rochester D&C)
 
 
 
House of Poon burns because of a fire, chlamydia
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
"Do you know why I pulled you over?" "No, officer." "Well, I forget, so never mind. Hey, is that a bag of chips?"
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Sirens ring, are you listening. In the bank, snow is glistening. A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight, DWI in a winter wonderland
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Fairbanks News-Miner)
 
 
 
"Everybody loves moose and they taste a lot better when they're not marinated with anti-freeze"
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Boss jailed after stabbing his employee in the butt with a pitchfork. And you thought your boss was the devil
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Confused sea lion discovered at airport...he thought he was a penguin
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
And that's the way the...wait, what? Cool
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Not news: Mom gives birth to twins. Sad: She dies while giving birth. Fark: And comes back to life once the kids are out. At least it was a natural birth
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Heady goes on the twosy herey
source: chesterchronicle.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Top 10 most annoying Americanisms. Happy holidays
source: blogs.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(402)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
A 17 year old student has her 30 year old gym teacher spend the night frequently in her room and her parents are surprised about their sexual activity. Dumbass tag is for the parents
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Journal News)
 
 
 
Is it safe? Man busted for running a dentist office in his kitchen. Mug shot and nasty pictures of teeth destroying implements included
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
One of the rarest photos you will ever see. A Yankee fan with his arm around a Red Sox fan
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 190: "Season's Greetings Cards II". Details and rules in the first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 


Wed December 24, 2008
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Being just 7 pounds overweight raises heart failure risk by 11%. So basically we're all farked
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Morphine doesn't work as well on women. Try chloroform
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
The top doctor for Washington State's prison system resigns, saying it's unethical for his staff to help with an execution
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(I-Mockery)
 
 
 
I-Mockery shows how even Skeletor can get into the holiday spirit as evidenced in "He-Man & She-Ra: A Christmas Special"
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(15)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Baby Boomers. New Hotness: "Cuspers", who were born 1954-1965. Suck it, Boomers
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Waiter, there's a Mosque in my Nativity Scene
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house. Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. That is, until the stove exploded
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
NewsFlash
 
American Airlines jet skids off the runway. This is not a repeat from Saturday, and Leon's getting laaarrrrrrrgerrrrr
source: cbs4denver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(WCCO.com)
 
 
 
Anonymous donor gives $1 million to split among 65 people after losing their apartments to fire
source: wcco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
'twas the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring not even a _____
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(214)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
San Francisco International Airport to offer "carbon offset kiosks" for guilt-ridden flyers who feel like they have too much money
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(176)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Tinfoil futures skyrocket after hundreds of residents call police about the unidentified "military helicopter" that's been hovering over their neighborhood every night at 2 AM
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Your annual Christmas Eve/Norad Santa tracking thread. There's eggnog and spiked hot cocoa to the right
source: network.nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(NewsOK)
 
 
 
Who knew blood pressure meds could turn you into a pedo?
source: newsok.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(My Fox Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Lawyer for firefighter accused of beating 6-month old puppy to death with a rock derides pup's photo; "I'm sure Jeffrey Dahmer had baby photos that were very cute"
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(300)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
Stupid: Leaving your car unlocked and having things stolen. Dumbass: You're a cop. Moran: The stolen things are your gun, taser, and pepper spray. Someone's in for a Merry Christmas
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
United Way employee of 22 years fired for attending to ailing husband
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
In Iceland, children have to watch out for the "Sausage Snatcher" to make his appearance on Christmas
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Why we act like morons at 4-way stops
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Dying girl living in hospice only wants snow for Christmas. Nevermind that she's in Georgia, she got her White Christmas
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Arizona Star)
 
 
 
Soon to be on the "10 Most Harmful Books" list - "Das Capital": the Japanese mango comic book. To speed Kapitalism's departure, the Japanese have created a manga book from Karl Marx "Das Kapital"
source: azstarnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Cincinnati Enquirer)
 
 
 
If at first you don't succeed, try try again, unless you're trying to solicit sex with a boy
source: news.cincinnati.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Eight old school toys that got badass makeovers. Rule of thumb: The moment classic toys are introduced to electricity, shiat starts getting out of hand
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(212)
 
(KING5)
 
 
 
Alaska Airlines now offering complimentary de-icing inside the cabin
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Democrat & Chronicle)
 
 
 
The dumbest way to win a girl's heart
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 
(Some Santa)
 
 
 
Louisiana mom forces hot 18- and 23-year-old daughters to sit in Santa's lap
source: 2theadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(259)
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
News we get only at Christmas: Article digs up where guy who translated "Stille Nacht" into English is buried
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(23)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Salvation Army officers say cash-strapped shoppers have left their kettles empty. Nah, just kidding: the red kettles have been stuffed with dollars, coins and checks beyond their yuletide dreams
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Theme: Holiday greeting cards with a twist
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(45)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Woman's husband speaks to her from the Beyond through a crappy Chinese toy at Big Lots
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Tobacco orbs: Melt in your mouth, not in your lungs
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Police end cliffhanger for those wondering what happened to former child actor who appeared in Highway to Heaven, Trapper John, MD, Pee Wee's Big Adventure, and, finally, America's Most Wanted
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Christmas lights waste electricity and are bad for the environment, so Merry Christmas, you selfish, wasteful Mother Gaia haters
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Oil falls below $37 a barrel on reports of reindeer-powered aircraft being spotted
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Bad ads update - ads back on, if we guessed right on who was sending them the problem is fixed. Email me immediately if there are more problems -Drew
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(338)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Anonymous elf hands out $13,000 to Skid Row. Sebastian Bach ecstatic
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Iran's Ahmadinejad to make fireside Christmas broadcast in UK. "Merry holiday, you pagan pig-eating satan dogs. Thank you for the lovely scarf."
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(82)
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Anonymous "Guns for money" program takes guns, has no money, then asks for ID. Other than that, its working perfectly
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Cat named "Voodoo" sets feline no-chute base-jumping record
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Today's children's consumer products company publishing a phone sex line instead of their customer service number brought to you by Fisher-Price and the Fail tag
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(31)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The new Radio Flyer wagon comes equipped with 5-point safety harnesses, padded seats, cup holders, foot brakes and fold-out storage containers. Too bad you can't get financing
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(159)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Those who are truly blessed this Christmas are not the children with the most expensive toys, nor the households with the most lavish dinners. They are those who are secure in the unity of their families"
source: dailyexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
"When what to my wondering eye should appear, but eight lowrider cars all jacked down in the rear." The story of Pancho Claus
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(18)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
WTF FTW, MLFHNTR, WTFOMFG, BNG BUS, I LUV ANL and 44 other vanity license plates that slipped by the DMV
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(216)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
As if reduced purchasing and credit weren't enough, now struggling retailers are being whacked with an 84% increase in shoplifting. Why do consumers hate America?
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
If your home was built during the construction boom, and you have irritated eyes, coughing, sneezing, difficulty breathing, and symptoms similar to bronchitis and asthma, thank China
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
When arguments at Florida gas stations escalate, urine's sure to be involved
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Here's how to follow Santa Claus on-line tonight. NORAD, Twitter and Google Earth are on the job
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop this strange-suited man
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
If you run over someone with your bus and the passengers notice it, you should probably pull over and help the guy
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"Of all the things you could say to a cop with an automatic weapon after he's pulled you out of the car on the side of the highway at midnight, Isaac Chaves chose: "I've had 15 beers"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
This Bud's for getting even the toughest stains out absolutely, positively overnight because I slept at a Holiday Inn last night and had a Pepsi, Coke, Triple Steak Burrito and Mountain Dew for lunch while driving in my Ford Tough truck
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Woman says she was fired for answering the phone saying "Merry Christmas". Her former employer, however, says she was just a biatch
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(405)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Australian Christmas gift appeal for the needy receives 363,000 donations, up 10.6 per cent from last year, the most ever donated, despite the economic meltdown
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(Web MD)
 
 
 
Finally, the annual naughty list of holiday foods slideshow
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(113)
 
(San Francisco 49ers)
 
 
 
Reporter discovers what Jews have known for decades: Chinese restaurants are open on Christmas
source: hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
The coolest pictures of ice sculptures you'll see before you have to go shovel 3 feet of snow from your walkway
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
After long fight with DMV, retired NYPD officer finally gets to put his vanity plates on his car. His GETOSAMA plate
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(44)
 
(KREM Spokane)
 
 
 
If you make an anonymous call theatening to shoot the plow driver if he comes down your street again, remember, REMEMBER, the police have caller ID
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(63)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
You know those stories the media runs about how Christmas is when most couples decide to get divorced? Yeah, the media is pulling them out of their ass
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
The stories vary but one way or another a penis was bitten
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
U.S. planning world dictatorship? It's more вероятно than you думайте
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(260)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Why Santa wears red, how come we eat turkey on Christmas, what's the deal with Christmas trees and other holiday questions answered
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Frequent Acronyms Reportedly Kooky, Hodge-podge Experts Are Discombobulated, Laud Immediate Naming End
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(52)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Girl who would represent Mexico in next year's Miss World arrested in vehicle with 7 men, AR-15 assault rifles, handguns, cartridges and $50,000 in cash. In related news, SLUTTY GIRLS WITH GUNS AND MONEY THREAD
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(229)
 
(George Donner)
 
 
 
According to the cannibals in Papua New Guinea, Japanese people are tastiest, while whites are too salty. Hannibal Lecter has yet to weigh in
source: bild.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Starpulse)
 
 
 
Lance "Lefty" Armstrong proves that you can still fly the plane with only one engine and deliver the passengers to their destination
source: starpulse.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Not news: Two-foot long crocodile found. News: By a pest control man in an apartment bathtub. Fark.com: In London (with helpful pic of what a crocodile looks like)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Why I celebrate Christmas, by the world's most famous atheist
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(250)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Sometimes news isn't published and you rely on photos from an event. Like this decompression that happened on a flight. Pic is of my niece, taken today, with oxygen mask waiting to die
source: img120.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Unsurprisingly, studies found that giving cocaine to bees makes them want to dance to crappy house music while babbling endlessly about nothing and spending unreasonable amounts of time in the bathroom
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Canadian buried in snowbank survives for 3 days. Cites beer, poutine, lack of anywhere else to be
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Some men are getting women pregnant without sleeping with them, then keeping the baby. You submitted this with a "you're doing it wrong" meme
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
"Are you saying that if I dig far down enough beneath my living room I'd strike oil? What is this, the effing Beverly Hillbillies? "
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man and his planes
source: cpn.canon-europe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Cop investigating the theft of a handgun, jewelry and cash uses the suspect's toilet and can't flush it. Lifts up the lid and discovers the missing gun. "I guess it was just dumb luck."
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Heartland Connection)
 
 
 
If you must shoplift from Wal-Mart, don't get in a rasslin match with security. And if you must, don't leave the baby in the freezing car. But if you must, make sure the drugs are out of your pocket before your adventure begins
source: heartlandconnection.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Daily Sparks Tribune)
 
 
 
Playas wanna play, wankstas wanna preen, we just wanna piss, in the ice machine
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you've ever wanted to see a pickup truck encased in a block of ice, here's your chance
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 


Tue December 23, 2008
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Unmentionable story of the day: Underwear kiosk explosion injures 13
source: themoscowtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby aardvark born at the Detroit Zoo. Seriously, this thing is ugly-ass
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
Two recycled holiday stories in one convenient place: How to clear ice and snow and how to drive safely in winter weather
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Theme: Photoshop "New Years Baby 2009" and " Old Man 2008"
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Detroit has been "stealing" Canadian water for 44 years, possibly as revenge for Detroit money sucked up by Windsor strip clubs
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(NewsNet5)
 
 
 
Sandusky's homeless say, "Thanks for the soup" as Cedar Point donates $6,500 which coasters shook from park visitors' pockets in 2008. That's $182,000 since 1988
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(WBTV)
 
 
 
I guess there's no good place to drop your ammo, but a mall escalator's got to be among the worst
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Russian missle touted "capable of penetrating any prospective missile defenses" - assuming it reaches its tar-BOOM
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)
 
 
 
Frozen pipes + torch = burnination trifecta complete
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Slow news day: Here's Casey Anthony's Christmas dinner plans
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Easy to follow flow chart for the digital TV transition. Give it to your grandparents
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Some of the 173 people trapped for six hours on world's tallest ferris wheel "a bit disturbed". But they'll come around
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Mother has a heart attack after thieves steal her kids' Christmas presents (w/ saddest picture of children posing in front of a bare Christmas tree you'll see all day)
source: cairns.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Austin suburb enacts ban on dog chains. Your dog doesn't want a stake
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
30-year-old ape taught herself how to whistle after hearing her keepers. Here comes the Sun
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(NewsNet5)
 
 
 
12-year-old, who dreamed of being an Army chaplain and was made a honorary member of the US Army, dies of brain cancer and given burial with full military honors. Submitter has something in his eye
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(257)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Sting operation catches funeral crashers who attend memorial services of people they don't know in order to get free booze
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Nerve)
 
 
 
The 10 best Wil Wheaton quotes. The story about Lard Ass strangely absent
source: nerve.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Some Scrooge)
 
 
 
Not news: Man told to stop loitering in front of Wal-Mart. Fark: He was dressed as Santa and handing out Wal-Mart gift cards
source: wfsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Animal rights activists plead their case by mailing lab workers used sanitary napkins and needles, saying they're infected with HIV, and accusing them of being pedophiles. Your dog wants a little farking dignity
source: fe22.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Interview with actual pirate touches on mutiny, looting, turning 40 and hatred of ninjas
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Batshiat-crazy cheerleader mom seeks revenge for little snowflake's lack of talent. Yes, it's Texas. Again
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Guineans face uncertain future, missing bar towels
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Pranksters put up signs on buildings telling people it is legal to pee against that wall. City council? Yeah, they're pissed (pic)
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Iraqi parliament votes to allow presence of foreign troops in country after December 31. Whew, that's a relief
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
If you had the French guy with the really long name in your "Madoff investors who lost everything" suicide pool, collect your winnings, if indeed, they can be recovered from a hopelessly complicated fake investment scheme
source: dealbook.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
PROTIP: If you're going to a Bears game in December during sub-zero temperatures without gloves or a hat, make damn sure you remember where you parked your car
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Modern version of the Bible features busty pic of Victoria Silvstedt and graphic photo of two men French kissing. Who could possibly have a problem with that?
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Between their seven other kids and their neighbor's kids, parents fail to notice that their 5-year-old son is missing after visiting Christmas lights display. For 14 hours. Sounds like the plot of a bad movie
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Seattle proud of using cheaper, more environmentally friendly sand instead of salt to clear ice-caked streets. If you ignore fact that it doesn't clear streets, it's an excellent solution
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(264)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Donald Trump sues town for $100M for refusing to allow improvements needed to maintain the "Trump image". Which apparently involves ficus trees
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Again it is Christmastime, the season of JonBenet's death." Stay classsy, CNN
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Washington Post and Baltimore Sun to share content. They could probably spin off a third paper just by covering the shootings and stabbings
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Chicago records 500th homicide of the year, 509 if you count the Cubs' gag job vs. the Dodgers in October
source: chicagobreakingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
A Dreidel Champion Is Crowned: "At the Spinagogue, only skill can bring home the gelt"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
It was inevitable: co-workers of the $207M Mega Millions winners have filed suit
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fotoladen dieser computer
source: shoggy.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Cabbage Patch Kid arrested for theft
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
News: Man steals a truck to head home for the holidays. Fark: It's a $500,000 fire engine
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman goes to hospital for stomach pain and gives birth to the biggest cramp she's ever had: "It didn't click until I got to the hospital and I felt the head"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Nineteen Americans made of WIN
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Rural Pennsylvania farm offers free housing & care for dogs of local deployed military personnel
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Newsweek predicts the most powerful people of 2009. #1 and #2 are obvious, #3 not so much
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(204)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Volunteers dig kilometer long trench in two meter deep snow to rescue a pair of horses trapped on a Canadian mountain
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
He's lived in frigid temperatures for centuries, wears a toque and boots, and employs the vertically challenged. Finally, Santa Claus is officially a Canadian citizen
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Santa Anna's cannonball stolen 172 years AFTER Alamo falls; delay blamed on government contractor
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Grocery employees tied up, again, by gun-toting robbers. Robbers do not find any money in the store. Again
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
South Florida deputy must have missed the part of training that went over when to wave a gun and "bust a cap"
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Man lives one year without throwing anything away, soon to be referred to as "bachelor"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not to be outdone, man ignites house with blowtorch while melting ice on porch. House fire by blowtorch trifecta in play
source: capecodonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Daily Sparks Tribune)
 
 
 
Photo captures image of an "angel" in hospital hallway
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(Charleston Gazetter)
 
 
 
"Attempt at sex leads to wounding." Some may say he was doing it wrong, but it's just another Saturday night in West Virginia
source: wvgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
A third of teachers want creationism taught in UK schools. Although, why they need test tubes for that is anyone's guess
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(410)
 
(wlwt.com)
 
 
 
Attention women: stop cutting things off men while they sleep. It freaks them out. (with snip snip muggy goodness)
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(About.com)
 
 
 
Top paranormal events of 2008, or as experts call them, shenanigans
source: paranormal.about.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(Shiny Sheet)
 
 
 
A Grinch-like -- but apparently strong -- thief has made off with an 80-pound vintage candy cane sculpture
source: palmbeachdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(CBS2Chicago.com)
 
 
 
Man tries to close his car door after it flies open on the drive home, instead ends up driving into a wall, being ejected from his car and surviving a fall of 125 feet from the overpass onto the railroad tracks below. Tada
source: cbs2chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Unhappy with your bank's customer service? Just call 9-1-1 and report the bank's being robbed
source: suburbanchicagonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
This is (hic) your pilot speaking...(hic) we're getting ready to (hic)... Hey, Why is there cops with guns coming at me?
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Woman ordered out of nanny state restaurant because her baby's buggy is a 'health and safety risk'
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Today is Festivus. Air your grievances to the right
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(628)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
When writing letters on behalf of an Archbishop, it's best not to refer to another Archbishop as an a-hole
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
You go to McDonald's and find out they no longer offer their cheap double cheeseburger do you: a. call their customer hot line. b. start a petition. c. start yelling at employees and punch the drive-through window
source: kwch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(WJZ.com)
 
 
 
Maryland State Trooper arrested at Taco Bell for trying to pay with $2 bill
source: wjz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(276)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Dallas has a freeway shooter on the loose. The suspect? White male driving a pickup truck. Good luck with that
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Not news: Man steals car. News: Police find DNA evidence in car. Fark: Inside a mosquito
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bear over a barrel
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Some semi-ironic guy)
 
 
 
Water main break in suburban Maryland turns River Road into a river, trapping cars and forcing helicopter rescues
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
British government to launch investigation into how they accidentally hired some staff with a sense of humour
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man eats seven pounds of latkes to win contest, thankyouverymuch
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Flashing gang signs in your Santa photo will get you arrested in L.A. In other news, gangbangers get their photos made with Santa
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Thailand's self-proclaimed "Scorpion Queen" sets world record by holding live venomous scorpion in her mouth for 2 minutes, 3 seconds
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop these men and their balls
source: cache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Beef Battalion serves steaks to troops, apparently two days in the future
source: countryworldnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
JESUS...Where'd he go??
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(KDKA.com - CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Man trying to thaw a frozen pipe succeeds in thawing pipe by setting the house on fire
source: kdka.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 


Mon December 22, 2008
(UPI)
 
 
 
Convicted murderer's public defender learns some jurors and sheriff's deputies were having sex with each other during deliberations, wants jury declared well hung and her client granted a new trial
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If having a clown standing beside you reading poetry and passing towels while you use a public toilet doesn't freak you out, nothing will
source: themercury.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Just like during the Great Depression, sales of cosmetics are on the rise
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
That hot cocoa sampler box you regifted might just kill someone
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Plain old garden variety fail: you fly your kite next to powerlines and it gets caught. Fark Fail: you attempt to retrieve the kite with a metal pole
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Photoshop these martial artists
source: cache.boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Gang of Santas involved in vicious street brawl
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
In a move that will surely be respected and embraced by the Fark community, lawmaker wants to force people to use their real names when posting comments on the Internet. "It's just true silliness"
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(696)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Letting your sprinklers water a highway in freezing temperatures is no way to get more business, AutoZone (but it is a way to kill people)
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Now banks are threatening to repossess homes from people who have never been late on their mortgage. "If it can happen to us it can happen to anyone."
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man tries to bribe cops $50K for a $3.80 ticket. What recession?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Chuck E. Cheese's - Where a kid can play with discarded condoms
source: baltimoreexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Since of course they didn't bother to check its authenticity, NY Times admits it published a fake letter from the mayor of Paris
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Villagers attack 50 women and beat them with sticks after accusing them of witchcraft. This is not a repeat from 1692
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Birmingham, AL one of the least healthy cites in America. In fact no Southeastern city made the top ten. Deep fried Coca Cola surrenders
source: bizjournals.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(189)
 
(Some Bloomfieldian)
 
 
 
What do you call a man with no legs who robs a bank, gets captured, fails at a suicide attempt, and then gets married in his prison uniform with guards as witnesses? Steven
source: bloomfieldfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Utah's population grew faster in last ten years than that of any other state, according to Utah's Director of Clown Car Vaginism
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Face appears in an icicle. Since it's in the Godless Northwest, no one claiming it's Jesus
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
It'll be "Sex in the City." With werewolves. And we'll call it "biatches." Yeah, this should end well
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Corpus Christi Caller-Times)
 
 
 
Alcohol abuse: Man hits woman with beer can then empties it on her head because she refused to wear slacks
source: caller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Illinois Health Department falls victim to food poisoning at Office Party
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Farker Hulkster places first in Christmas display contest, wins free KFC for a year. Next Boulder/Denver Fark party is gonna be finger lickin' good
source: komar.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Daily News)
 
 
 
As if life isn't hard enough when you're a 15 year old albino herdsman living in rural Tanzinia, apparently you also have to worry about being kidnapped by local businessmen for the purposes of witchcraft
source: dailynews.habarileo.co.tz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(City Pages)
 
 
 
Bar owner who's given away 120,000 free slyders to his patrons gets inducted into White Castle Hall of Fame. In other news, there's a White Castle Hall of Fame
source: blogs.citypages.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Contact Music)
 
 
 
Eric Clapton says shooting helps social skills. Mark David Chapman unavailable for comment
source: contactmusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
♪♪And Rocky Raccoon ♪ had blocked all the fumes ♪ killing a man with carbon monoxide ♪♪
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
That'll do pig, that'll do
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(The Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
City cuts gas line in front of popular restaurant, forcing it to close for a day. Do they a) tell them tough luck, b) spring a surprise health inspection, or c) reimburse them for their lost business? Wait, what?
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Liposuction doctor powered his cars with human fat, inadvertently making the US the largest source of renewable energy in the world
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Rare disorder causes woman's heart to stop when she swallows, according to this article which WOMEN SHOULD NEVER BE ALLOWED TO SEE
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Lonely German man A) drunk dials his ex at 3 am, B) surfs the internet for pr0n or C) jumps into polar bear cage
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Officer deploys his taser into naked woman, denies that it was premature
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Is your Christmas tree feeling flaccid? Pining for a harder cone? Spruce up your tree this yule with a simple erectile aid
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
US cities battle over claim to Edgar Allan Poe's legacy as date of his 200th birthday nears. In Baltimore, where you take your heroes however you can get them, Poe dying drunk in the gutter seems to work just fine
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a bunny who had no ears
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this timely delivery
source: shorpy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(wrno)
 
 
 
Not news: sexual activity spikes during holiday season. SHOCKING ANGLE: parties and alcohol involved
source: wrno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Malaysia urges voluntary HIV screening for Godless heathen non-muslims and the sluts they marry
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(KTEN)
 
 
 
Grandpa, be careful. There's some crazy guy driving the wrong way on the interstate. One? Hell, there's a whole bunch of 'em
source: kten.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
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