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Sun August 17, 2008
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Kingston Daily Freeman)
 
 
 
Dumbass: Man arrested for selling cocaine to an undercover officer. Fark: While in training to become a police officer. Delicious: And was arrested by his own instructors
source: dailyfreeman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Matthew 5:29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out. HOA 8:17. Your Ford F-150 pickup in your driveway offends us, so pluck it out
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(277)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Amateurs working cold case in Alaska identify mummified remains from 1948 plane crash as Francis Joseph Van Zandt. Springsteen stunned
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(KIRO TV)
 
 
 
Home-built items can often save money, still be high quality. Helicopters, not so much
source: kirotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Honolulu Star-Bulletin)
 
 
 
Leader of activists who stormed Hawaiian palace Friday couldn't find the throne room
source: starbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Why it takes women 3,276 hours to get ready for a night out
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(526)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Remote cameras photograph rare hypno-leopard in Borneo (with pic)
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Appleton, Wisconsin accosted by sticker-wielding fiend. Each sticker has the words "art object" plus a price ranging from one cent to $10,000
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Canadian man earns $2,200 after recycling 22,000 beer cans. "I have a lot of friends that come over"
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(kenosha news)
 
 
 
Woman upset that, upon enrolling her biracial child for school, the form offered only black or white as choices. Forgot that she lives in Wisconsin
source: kenoshanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(369)
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Having solved the problems of Ohio's declining economy, billion dollar funding shortfall, and eroding infrastructure/educational system, state govt tackles humantarian issue of converting prison inmates' analog TVs to digital next year
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lovely couple
source: i5.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Agave growers giving up and planting more lucrative crops, setting the stage for the great tequila shortage of 2010
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Burglar flees in boxers, after brief chase gets away. Maybe he's hiding under there
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Then: America must embrace wind power to save the planet. Now: Big Wind is despoiling nature, ruining America's farms, splitting up families. Soon to come: America must embrace moonbeams and unicorn farts to save the planet
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(287)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Nanny state spends $1.5m cutting people's trash cans in half...in vain hope it will halve their waste
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Russia, on Georgia withdrawl: "If I would ask you in response to the same question how fast the American forces can leave Iraq, for example, the answer would be as soon as we have guarantees for peace and security there"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(340)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Anchorage residents tired of bear attacks, begin fighting back. "I wasn't going to lay down and take it. I started punching it in the head... I was boxing him."
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Nineteen-year-old rapist sues 15-year-old rape victim for child support. And wins. Is there an ordered pair of genders in which this headline makes any sense?
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(361)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption these two meercats
source: cwebh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Mister Rogers would like to show you something
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
101 picnic recipes...all on one page. Don't forget the coleslaw
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Iran launches satellite into space, re-entry expected somewhere over Tel Aviv
source: english.farsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(284)
 
(Some Slow Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Improve this street sign
source: fishmonger.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(AlterNet)
 
 
 
Living without a car
source: alternet.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(425)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Steps to take to train your cat. Your dog wants...wait, what?
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Police looking for heroin burst into an apartment with six children, club an epilectic man in the head with a rifle butt, then realize they were in the wrong apartment
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(246)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Governor to Florida Keys visitors and residents: EVERYBODY PANIC
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Allegedly, Joyce talked a 15-year-old boy into breaking into a house to raise money so she could buy a prosthetic leg for a beloved horse
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Indiana Jones - 1, teen party gatecrashers - 0
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Mayor of "Beer Goggle Capital of the World," where men outnumber women 5-1, invites ugly girls to move there. "Quite often you will see walking down the street a lass who is not so attractive with a wide smile on her face"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The most awesome or pathetic obituary evar, depending on your perspective (link gone, but text of obit in first post)
source: legacy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(401)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
MSNBC doing a poll about removing "In God We Trust" from American money. Caption what should take its place
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(389)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The English government wants you to exercise at bus stops by standing on one leg, pointing your toes or clenching your buttocks
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
100 Canucks dress up like zombies, mindlessly walk around downtown, get confused as Republican convention
source: canadianpress.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Olympic Fakery. China faked the fireworks and singing during the opening ceremonies. Photoshop some other things that might not be quite what they appear
source: a123.g.akamai.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Awesome...Couple buys untouched flood house in New Orleans to rehab it and move in. FARK...city knocks it down, even after it's removed from the demolish list...sad picture included
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Brother connected to San Francisco tiger attack going to prison for unrelated offenses (with pouty emo mugshot)
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Great haul of China. Phelps wins record 8th gold medal
source: sportsillustrated.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(318)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
"After spending her 27th birthday stranded on the side of Aoraki Mt Cook in chest-deep snow and blizzard conditions with little but chocolate to eat, all Melissa Clerke wanted was a beer."
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Lincoln Star Journal)
 
 
 
Travel advisory for folks driving I-80 through Nebraska: just because the giant gas station marquee offers gas for $3.75/gallon doesn't mean they aren't going to charge you $4.16/gallon
source: journalstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Two teenagers charged with conspiracy to commit an act of terrorism after defacing playing cards and leaving them at various stores. The cards had "Joker" written on them and "police considered them threatening"
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
"Authorities say foul play is not suspected." Apparently, this 70 year old woman drove herself to a farm in the middle of no where and locked herself in the trunk
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 


Sat August 16, 2008
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
$7.95: Cost of "Great Sex Kit" teen boy shoplifted from store. Priceless: Ridicule same teen will endure for getting arrested for shoplifting "Great Sex Kit"
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
European vacation spots getting a bit tired of arresting so many drunken Brits on holiday, despite protestations that being drunk is the normal state for a Briton
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Dumb: Stealing a case of 3.2 beer from 7-11. Dumber: Getting caught while waiting for the getaway bus. Dumberer: Stealing two 12-packs from the same store the next day. Fark: Getting caught while waiting for the getaway bus again
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Arkansas man finds 4.42 carat diamond at state park, cousins excited at prospect of engagement ring
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(GB Press Gazette)
 
 
 
Man who tried to steal ATM with forklift makes court appearance; pleads not guilty. Because having the stolen car and ATM in your driveway isn't proof of anything
source: greenbaypressgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
♫ Little ditty about Jack and Diane ♫ Two American kids with a house in the Hartford land ♫ For seven years they were going through the door ♫ With their mother's decomposing corpse still lying on the floor ♫
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Japan to summon random unqualified citizens to act as judges in murder trials. USA scoffs, says it already perfected this system in early 90s with the OJ trial
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(pioneer local)
 
 
 
"After my illuminating experiences -- humiliations, really -- during three obedience courses, I accept this fact: My dog wouldn't rescue the pinned victim under a rock. He'd frisk him for food"
source: pioneerlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Palo Alto Daily News)
 
 
 
When your Bigfoot press conference is hijacked by a guy in a Chewbacca costume wielding a "We hide for a reason" sign, you might just have a credibility problem
source: paloaltodailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(National Review)
 
 
 
You pull out a pistol, shove it in a UN official's thigh and demand the keys to the SUV while your comrades watch and laugh in tanks? That's how Russians shop for cars. You Americans clearly do war wrong
source: media.nationalreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British teen bleeds to death after single stab wound to the back because emergency operators "cannot send an ambulance if we can hear more than five people in the background"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Honolulu Star-Bulletin)
 
 
 
For the second time in four months, Hawaiian sovereignty activists storm palace, claim the Kingdom of Hawaii is back
source: starbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(SB Sun)
 
 
 
Mayor's anti-crime program manager gets caught shooting photos of nude young women at a city youth center. Police not amused
source: sbsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this serene scene
source: flamber.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Austrailian Premier wants women at festival to keep their shirts on, saying, "you can have a lot of fun without turning off international visitors." Submitter respectfully disagrees
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Detroit News)
 
 
 
Michigan Supreme Court rules it's legal for nursing home employees to pose corpses & take cellphone pictures with them. Lynndie England seen buying ticket to Detroit
source: detnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
This will end well: Omaha police want to hire 'former' criminals to hit the streets and sniff out plans for retaliatory shootings
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: Disney markets underwear to 7 year old girls. Fark: with the words "Dive In" printed on them
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Russian General threatens nuclear strike against Poland. Cold War II officially begins
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(395)
 
(NBC 15)
 
 
 
The police catch you flipping off motorists. Do you (A) claim you were scratching an itch, (B) swear someone insulted you and you were merely angry about it, or (C) squeeze the officer's nuts, resulting in a felony?
source: nbc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
The new converted-Phalanx C-RAM (counter rocket, artillery, mortars) weapon deals with incoming at night, in a scene that Coppola is going to work into his 17th recut of Apocalypse Now (language NSFW)
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(242)
 
(Some Backwoods Rag)
 
 
 
Today's teacher/teen scandal come to us from South Carolina, with semi-hitable picture
source: gwdtoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Spending thousands of dollars on your wedding. New hotness: Getting married for less than a grand - including $100 for catering
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(275)
 
(ScoopThis)
 
 
 
Fark friends "ScoopThis.com" celebrate 10-year anniversary by putting site archives back online (Parodies, B-Team, Hyatte, etc.)
source: scoopthis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Study: After spending thousands of dollars, Canadian scientists discover that teens lack judgement when driving
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Yet another Olympics snafu: All 56 children representing 56 Chinese ethnic groups at the opening ceremonies were Han solo
source: irishtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(188)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
France celebrates 60 years of the Citroen 2CV, originally designed to take 4 people--or sheep--and carry a basket of eggs across a ploughed field without breaking any shells
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Military funds mind-reading science. You want steak
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Recording a cop during a traffic stop...go to jail. Welcome to the Peoples Republic of Massachusetts
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(264)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy working industriously to imminentize the eschaton
source: mediaarchive.cern.ch   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
TONIGHT Chicago Fark Party. The Lincoln Tap Room. LGT Bar, details in thread, this one's gonna be great. Drew will be there as well
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Norway's crown prince Haakon sinks the royal boat. Unfortunately for him, this is not a euphemism
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
ABC asks "Will Tropical Storm Fay Go All the Way?" and features a photo of a man in his underwear in front of a fallen tree. You stay classy, ABC News
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Arizona state mental hospital bans smoking for patients. That'll drive 'em nuts
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Not news: Man has been arrested 52 times. News: Man is starting his 33rd jail term. Fark: Man is only 35
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Russia Signs Truce Agreement. Thank god we had a strong black politician who was able to negotiate a peaceful resolution
source: customwire.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(The Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
Kindergarten teacher accused of molesting four students gets apology from parents, school board when forensic testing shows that nothing happened. Not really, she was fired anyway
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Suburbanites rough it in the wild at a $1450 per-week upscale campground, where the tree houses come equipped with flat screen TVs for those who prefer 1080p over the 360 degree vista
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(newsminer)
 
 
 
North Pole's "Mrs. Santa Claus" dead at 91. Actually named daughter Merry Christmas
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Fayetteville Observer)
 
 
 
Not news: Old lady calls cops after drunk kid drives over her lawn. News: Suspect's father grabs kid out of bed, hands him to cops. Fark: Father is police chief. Ultrafark: Judge says kid's rights violated
source: fayobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Old & busted: poisoning pigeons in the park. New hotness: painting pigeons purple in the park
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
"You can go anywhere in the world, and people will say, 'Canton? Yeah, I know where that is. It's where that big flea market is."'
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A holiday to Australia combined with an unusal coincidence lead to neighbours thinking their friend has died and a raid by police
source: gazettelive.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(WTMJ)
 
 
 
Pabst Brewing Company bringing back Schlitz to beer taps in Midwest. No, not that crappy swill your dad drank, but the original brew that your grandpa got lucky with your granny on
source: todaystmj4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Nanny state advocates taking obese kids from their parents as feeding them too much is as neglectful as starving them
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Man arrested for taking pictures at the Hippie Hollow nudist beach while hiding in the bush may not have violated any laws because there is no expectation of privacy there. Oh the huge mammary
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(floridatoday.com)
 
 
 
My to do list: 1. Drop off kids at day care. 2. Buy drugs. 3. Buy guns. Bonus: All at the same place
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
You just got your concealed weapons permit, where are you gonna go? DISNEY
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Lady celebrates Caturday by getting to keep her 150 cats, because there's no law against that. Fark does have a tag for it, though
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(421)
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Guy walks into GameStop, flashes gun and tells employee his family is being held hostage and he needs a PS3 to get them released. Actually GETS the PS3 (news video)
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
English dentist operates on a puffer fish that had broken a tooth in a fight with a stingray. Because it's not like there are any humans in his country that could have benefitted from his talents
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Theme: Future Billy Mays products
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Jack and Jill was really a 15th century abstinence lecture. Your weasel wants tupenny rice and treacle while riding cock horse to Banbury cross. ENGLISH MOTHERFARKER
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Texas once again begs for its own tag with a guy named Booger teaching Kindergarten Sex Club
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Phelps out-touches his competitors to win his 7th gold medal by one one-hundredth of a second, tying Mark Spitz for most gold medals in an Olympics. Gives a quick interview then promptly walks across the pool to the locker room
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(264)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
30 Men and a Baby
source: uk.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(New Scientist)
 
 
 
Fark mascot being studied by scientists
source: newscientist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(NV Daily)
 
 
 
Virginia town holds "Sheep and Goat Olympics" - gives a whole new meaning to an awkward dismount
source: nvdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
One of two cows which fled an abattoir in northern France was found 'hiding' in a drain. Well well
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Texas, still looking for its own tag, to let teachers carry guns
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(244)
 


Fri August 15, 2008
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Twenty three arrested in epic-fail beer run
source: ktsm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
One of the two samples of DNA said to prove the existence of the Bigfoot came from a human and the other was 96 percent from an opossum. That is legal in north Georgia
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Twenty sex lectures lasting 50 minutes each, and 34 lessons before the final test. It's not the MCAT, it's Japan's driver's license test
source: features.us.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Nearsighted man's lotto mistake earns him $3 million
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Peaceful Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this temple
source: pixdaus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
If your teenage son is shot and killed at school for being gay, the blame rests squarely on the school district, since they allowed him to wear makeup and feminine clothing to class
source: news.aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(403)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
$1.1 Million in marijuana found growing on Michigan farm. Farm owner "had no idea" the plants were growing there, also could not explain to police why he was trying to grow Funyuns
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(13WHAM)
 
 
 
Naked man steals pickup truck... Police wisely avoided asking him to pull out his driver's license
source: 13wham.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Eighth-grader has her boyfriend arrested for stalking her via text messaging and myspace after she broke up with him. Fark: It's her 40-year-old science teacher
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
First, he skidded around a corner, narrowly missing a cop. Then, after being pursued, he accidentally slammed into a parked police car. Theeeeeeen he just deliberately sideswiped a third police cruiser coming the opposite direction. Ta-dumbass
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Nepal seeks new child goddess: must have voice like a duck"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you plan to kidnap retarded children, you really, really should not get your name tatooed on their chest
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Twelve-year-old stopped by police pulling the minivan back into the driveway after dropping Mom off at the bar. Mom upset she didn't warn her to keep the 'Hello Kitty' proof-of-insurance card in her Bratz purse
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Brilliant career criminal attempts to rob pharmacy with caulking gun, then discovers that he accidentally locked his keys in the getaway vehicle
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Police determine that one of two neighbors who got into a fight attended the Mike Tyson school of conflict resolution
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
They can't be bargained with. They can't be reasoned with. They don't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And they absolutely will not stop, ever, until they're back in the White House
source: usnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(320)
 
(The Superficial)
 
 
 
The hottest anti-AIDS poster you will see today. MERCY (No actual nudity, but don't open it if your boss is walking by)
source: thesuperficial.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(235)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canada to launch new search for British sailors lost in the Arctic since 1845: after 163 years, they've decided to ask the Inuit if they saw anything
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania church leader, who drilled holes in children's genitalia in order to padlock them shut, released from prison today. Bonus: Doesn't have to register for Megan's Law. Double Bonus: Says he did nothing wrong
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(213)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Dyslexic doctor and "world's authority on lethal injection" estimates he's presided over 40 unexotices
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Woman arrested at her own prenup party for tackling fiancee football-style, punching him, throwing his watch into the bushes and breaking his glasses; finacee learns to say "yes dear" in record time
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Another hormonal mother calls the press and stages a protest when asked to breastfeed in a private area of a store. Vancouver, Toronto...next week Halifax
source: canadianpress.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(281)
 
(Some Guy)
 
Video
 
Cool dad makes rather awesome Star Wars VII sequel starring his kids
source: laughingsquid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Weekly mug shot round up from TSG starts off with freckles and 'fros, moves right into hittable hos
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Russia's latest tactic in the Cyberwar against Georgia: Trolling
source: main.uab.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Arson suspected innie fire on Navel Avenue that forced a family outie their home
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Milwaukee, Wisconsin named sexiest city, coincidentally the city had also been named the second drunkest city
source: todaystmj4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Wild horses couldn't drag me away . . . but wild chickens will wake me up at four in the god damn morning
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
WWJD ? Apparently nothing as he sits listening to the death penalty sentencing phase of his pedophile trial (with artist rendering that includes an angelic glow)
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(373)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Finally, a way to send anonymous, constructive notes like: "Please refrain from slapping people's buttocks."
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
In what is retroactively becoming the Worst. Opening Ceremonies. Ever; Chinese officials belatedly admit that the world's top classical Chinese dancer was paralyzed for life after a prop malfunctioned during rehearsal
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(616)
 
(Some Amused Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these rather confused young lads
source: i127.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Tropical depression forming near Puerto Rico. Area reports feeling listless, unmotivated, sleeping a lot
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Not news: Nils Olav, Colonel-in-Chief of the Norwegian King's Guard, receives knighthood. Fark: Nils Olav is a penguin. Bonus: pic of penguin reviewing his troops
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
The authors of the Left Behind series think that Obama is probably not the anti-christ. Truly, their wisdom is a gift to us all
source: voices.washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(398)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
The latest euphemism for the mentally retarded: GIFTED
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(506)
 
(ABA Journal)
 
 
 
Actual headline: Lawyer who paid rent of Edwards' mistress 'shocked' to learn of affair
source: abajournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Bush said Russia's invasion of Georgia in recent days has "damaged its credibility." Then heads off on vacation. Ironic tag baited into striking first by larger, better armed Dumbass tag
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(374)
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Lexington police crack down on UK game-day parking. And by the looks of the picture, they're pretty damn serious
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Final Minneapolis Fark party reminder: Saturday, 7 pm, Mortimer's Bar at Franklin and Lyndale
source: maps.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Donald Trump to buy Ed McMahon's house; Trump expected to pay for it with a check measuring 3 feet by 1 foot
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
"It ought not to be necessary to point out the differences between Saddam Hussein's Iraq and Mr Saakashvili's Georgia, but for those blinded by moral relativism, here goes"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(345)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
It would be easier to believe in the authenticity of the recently discovered Bigfoot carcass if it hadn't been discovered by "a pair of Bigfoot-hunting hobbyists"
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(261)
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Michelle Obama strips naked, leads police on high-speed chase. At least I think it's Michelle Obama...well, close enough for government (with pic of perhaps Michelle Obama)
source: kmbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(244)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Hidden camera under counter at Wal-Mart believed to be set up to capture credit card numbers. Because nobody wants an upskirt of a Wal-Mart cashier
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
This week's malfunctioning gas pump selling cheap gas brought to you by Texas. Surprisingly, no customers reported the mistake
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Russian soldiers have been caught on camera robbing a bank in war-torn Georgia. The submachinegun is there
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(202)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Good news, atheists. You can now get a discount at the county fair's "Faith Night." The bad news is you're still going to hell
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(687)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
MSNBC's hard-hitting journalistic masterpiece of the day: Are pre-teen girls too young to get bikini waxes?
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(450)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Police arrest Cinderella and Mickey Mouse in clash over working conditions. Is the rodent theme too much?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
A grand total of six illegal aliens sign up for the federal self-deportation program - for the rest it don't count man, it ain't written in ink
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
"Ow, My Balls" once again brought to you by Carl's Jr. and the state of Florida
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Batman is currently causing a 12-mile traffic jam outside London. Is there anything he can't do?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If it says Libya Libya Libya on the label label label you must take lawsuits lawsuits lawsuits off the table table table
source: wiredispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these crazy cats cutting a rug
source: dianesabba.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Caption this woman screaming from the back seat of a police cruiser
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Man and several women brawl at 7-11 with Mace and can of boiled peanuts. Fight results in "nearly 25 braided hair extensions strewn across the parking lot"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
3 girls, 1 Cupp
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"There were thousands of bodies piled high. I saw hearts that had been taken from live people in medical experiments..." One of the first Americans to help liberate Buchenwald prisoners dies
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(398)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Control tower tapes show the diversion of Obama's plane to St. Louis last month was serious; "we would like to declare an emergency and also have CFR (crash equipment) standing by in St. Louis". They even called in Rex Kramer
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
It's a Liukin/Johnson 1-2 punch and the USA girls gymnastic team runs away with the gold. Hero tag stands in because Cool tag has something in its eye
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(344)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Third donkey found wandering around Tennessee town; finally the city council is reunited. Ass
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(WINK)
 
 
 
Today's World's Dumbest Crook candidate rummages through restaurant with burglar alarms blaring, then answers phone call from security company, giving them his real name. Then it get stupider
source: winknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
What is the future of suburbia? A group of allegedly smart people predict what US suburbs will look like in 40 years
source: freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(302)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Russian state media reporting that the Georgian conflict was orchestrated by the Republican party to stop Obama from being elected president
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(291)
 
(Kate Winslet)
 
 
 
Photoshop this iceberg
source: img.liveinternet.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Tough Time Wine Guide: 5 wines under $10. (MD20-20 not on list)
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(177)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Man puts up 1991 Chevy Silverado with a million miles on it for sale. A MILLION miles? Wow, that's like two Courtney Loves and a Pamela Anderson at today's rates
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Newsleader.com)
 
 
 
They get to watch porn all day and draw jury pay. "Wood occasionally would stand up."
source: newsleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 


Thu August 14, 2008
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Court bans man from his girlfriend's apartment after neighbours perptually complain of loud and outrageous sex. With pic goodness of the couple in question
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(231)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
In other news: there are still morans who believe Earth is flat
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(322)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Court grants injunction to stop woman cutting off man's penis. Restraining order demands to keep her at least 7 inches away
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
City councilors in Bangor, Maine set up a fine jar for those that leave their cell phone on during meetings. The fine is 5 bucks and everyone else gets to call you an asshat
source: bangornews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Some Genius)
 
 
 
If you elect me to the School Board I promise everyone will get a Masters degree for $249
source: ocala.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Bad: You're a john, busted in a prostitution ring. Worse: you're a cop. Best: your wife is not only o.k. with it, says the police dept. forced you to have sex with prostitutes. She's a keeper
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(East Valley Tribune)
 
 
 
Mesa cops abandon police radio codes in favor of plain English, forcing rappers nationwide to publish translations of their now-dated lyrics
source: eastvalleytribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Bloomberg View)
 
 
 
Facebook allows users to change their middle name to "Hussein" in Obama solidarity protest. Name changes to "Derka Derka Muhammad Jihad" still not allowed
source: thestandard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(420)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Iron Photoshop ingredient: Eyes
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Noted political theorist/tranny Brooke Hogan criticizes Paris Hilton for her political ignorance
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(316)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Inflation hits annual pace not seen since 1991, when Bush was president and American troops were in Iraq... hey waitaminute
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(258)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Georgian reporter gets grazed by bullet on air. Throws on vest and keeps on reporting. Take that Dan Rather
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(314)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
'Perfect timing' Poland announces plans for American missile defense shield, pissing off the Russians
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(343)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Philadelphia man charged with tryng to extort Giants coach Tom Coughlin over phony sex claims
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
85 percent of flying public wants to see children in separate section of plane, 15 percent misunderstood the question
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(630)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Final Denver Fark Party Reminder: This Friday at the Hornet, 8 pm
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Politicker NJ)
 
 
 
Home Depot and other big-box stores in Los Angeles will have to provide shelter and bathrooms to day workers who loiter on their property waiting to be picked up for a job. Workers will still have to wipe their ass themselves, however
source: knbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(649)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Oil companies may drill off the coast of New Jersey, ruining beachgoers' view of sign-towing planes, medical waste washed up on shore, orange-tanned guidos, and fat guys with hair on their back
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
IOC to Chinese Govt: Stop farking with the journalists. Chinese Govt: Did you say something? What?
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Swedish wrestler throws down medal, cries like little girl, threatens Vince McMahon with folding chair. Bork
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(280)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Sentence for Michigan "Joker" not so serious
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
French Jews sue YouTube, presumably for perpetuating unfair stereotype that Jewish people are universally wealthy and educated
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(196)
 
(MyTelus)
 
 
 
California woman gives birth on front lawn. Well, either that or she has the most disgusting garden gnome ever
source: mytelus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Female Chinese gymnast born in 1995, meaning He was too young to compete in Olympics
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(741)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Today's episode of "Woman arrested by fire chief in Wal-Mart" brought to you by the letters F U C and the use of sign language
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(210)
 
(San Francisco 49ers)
 
 
 
Missing Elvis statue returned all shook up
source: hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Japanese local government mistakently broadcasts alert warning of imminent missile attack to 20 government buildings. "New pants required" alert was broadcast shortly after
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Congressman claims that trees contain 40% crude oil. Wants to start cutting down national forests to solve the oil crisis. Why didn't anyone think of this sooner?
source: unequivocalnotion.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(222)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Why Are Georgia and Georgia Both Named Georgia?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Russian foreign minister: "This is not the Georgian territorial integrity you were looking for. Move along."
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(365)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN discovers that people who cheat on their spouses often lie
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(247)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
CHICAGO FARK PARTY REMINDER, This Saturday, August 16th, The Lincoln Tap Room. Link goes to bar, Drew will be there, details in thread
source: google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Teen fights for right to wear Confederate Flag to school; other students say he's just doing it to be a dixie
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(671)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Tribes upset the US forest service's firefighting efforts are violating sacred Indian sites. "Don't you guys ever watch horror movies?" a spokesman for the tribes asked
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
At 14, city rallied around boy to get him a new heart. Five years later he's arrested for threatening to cut the heart out of a neighbor
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
President Bush urged to get tough with the Russians by threatening to not let them ferry us into space any more
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Colorize this opera fan in her balcony
source: i37.tinypic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Missoulian)
 
 
 
When giving police a false name, make sure the real one isn't tattooed on your head
source: missoulian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
High school wrestler arrested for using the "wiener to the face" move on a teammate
source: connpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(215)
 
(Occupy.com)
 
 
 
Man wins sexual discrimination claim against athletic clubs offering "ladies join free". Next up, 'Ladies Night' offers at night clubs & bars
source: lasvegasnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(371)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
What do you do when you want to buy a new truck but can't trust banks or paper money? You pay for it with 16 cans of coins
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Venomous lionfish escapes from Florida fish tank and wreaks havoc in Caribbean Sea. "This may very well become the most devastating marine invasion in history"
source: customwire.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
The goggles, they do something
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Judge: I can't force colleges to accept credit from science classes that teach that the noodly appendage gave life to everything. Christians: WHARRGARBL
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1002)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Georgian President to McCain: Put up or shut up
source: politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(343)
 
(Some cornhole)
 
 
 
ABC's hit television show "Wife Swap" seeking cornhole fanatics
source: playcornhole.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
'Abba, get upstairs and tidy your bedroom'
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Sydney's graffiti squad remove the chalk designs, posters and stencil works that made up the 'Eye Saw' exhibit, despite museum employees telling them not to destroy it
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(WWL)
 
 
 
Today's "Vulcan causes massive oil spill on Mississippi River" brought to you by New Orleans (w/ photo proof of time-travel goodness)
source: wwl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
'Tree Man' who grew roots out of his body has four pounds of warts removed, says he wants to get married, raise saplings
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
British woman being evicted from home for flushing toilet at night and ironing too loud
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Politicker NJ)
 
 
 
'99 Cent Only Store To Raise Prices'
source: knbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(KSDK)
 
 
 
In 2024, White Americans will not be the majority in America. Everybody Hispanic
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(355)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop an ad for Fark Beer. Link goes to a pint
source: iamspencer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Seven years of college down the drain
source: wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(318)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Don't stand up fast enough while handcuffed? That's a tasering, tasering, tasering, tasering, tasering, tasering, tasering, tasering, tasering, death
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
The people of Napier, New Zealand can sleep soundly - the 'Piddler on the Roof' has turned himself in to police
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 166: Tricky. Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 


Wed August 13, 2008
(Fox News)
 
 
 
I know it's tempting, but really... try to avoid shining your laser pointer at police helicopters. They're the police. And they're in a helicopter. You're not going to get very far
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Drug war opponent Danny Kushlick puts down the bong long enough to call drug prohibition "one of the great social policy disasters of the last 100 years"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(215)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Julia Child was just one of many WWII spies for the OSS. She used her mini-camera on the Krauts
source: fe20.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Singin' karaoke in a trailer park with 'nuther woman? That's a drive-over
source: weblogs.sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
How do you combat rising food prices: If you said make rat farms and sell their meat, you are correct
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Youth pastor and Christian school teacher arrested for making his 15-year old student scream, "Oh God, oh God"
source: dailyastorian.info   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(wltx.com)
 
 
 
So I've got a good idea. How 'bout we go steal a bear cub, take it to a truck stop, and charge people a dollar to pet it. Sounds bulletproof, right? Ask John Chadwick Montgomery
source: wltx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(NWCN)
 
 
 
Mysterious woman stalks Oregon nursing home, offering massages to old people while pretending to be their granddaughter or care worker
source: nwcn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this old merry-go-round
source: playgroundsupervision.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
News: Only Al-Qaeda female in FBI's 100 Most Wanted list captured. Scary: Had plans of NYC, subways, an animal disease plant and was planning assassinations of former presidents
source: cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(210)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Georgia: "We are handing over our ports and airports to US military control". US Gov: "Wait...what?"
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(284)
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Ed Asner, former Dallas Cowboy Mark Stepnoski, hip hop group Arrested Development demand a new investigation to 9/11
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Man found dead in Denver hotel room had one pound of cyanide, was Somali living in Canada, and had recently warned of "death" on religious internet chat room
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(FOX 10 News)
 
 
 
Naked man runs amok in neighborhood with an ax, chasing kids and chopping down doors. Then it gets weird
source: myfoxgulfcoast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
39 year old hittable Rocky Mount, NC female teacher allowed a student to rock and mount her
source: rockymounttelegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
How hot can a 65 year-old woman be that a 47 year-old man would kidnap her to keep to himself?
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
World's tallest woman dies at 53. Deuce Bigalow inconsolable
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Nineteen-month old falls 25-30 feet out of third floor window. Gets up with nothing wrong with him, other than his mother is an idiot
source: bangornews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Some Tall Guy)
 
 
 
Caption contest: What are these guys yelling?
source: d.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Denver police build "Gitmo on the Platte": A warehouse full of cages and barbed wire to house arrested protesters at the Democratic Convention
source: cbs4denver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(278)
 
(Cookie monster)
 
 
 
Police with guns drawn stormed the cookie aisle like "Nazi storm troopers" with a warrant for stolen Nilla Wafers
source: macombdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Put this one under the "hot stripper who smiles in her mugshot after shooting her boyfriend over $150" file
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
You know those "gold" medals the athletes are kissing and biting while on the podium? Yea, well along with the thrill of victory, it looks like they could be getting lead poisoning
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
TSA: "Did you forget your ID when you flew? Congratulations, you are our newest entry to our terrorist watch list"
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(166)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Reporter spends a week living in an airport and concludes it's a big, busy place with lots of plastic benches and international air passengers
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Mugshot and surveillance video of Colorado's phony "porn inspector"
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Sorry about the rocks in lieu of raisins in your bread, Here's five bucks
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Having solved all other problems, NYC orders stores with air conditioning to close their doors
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(223)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
"I am the airline passenger you dread most of all, more even than the religious fanatic or flatulent fat guy. I am the passenger accompanying small children"
source: features.us.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(509)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
This debate professor finally comprehends the obvious: the quickest way to win a debate is to show 'em your ass
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
During the DNC, Al-Jazeera will spotlight Colorado town where Coors is brewed. Once again showing they'll do anything to make the US look bad
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Principal resigns at 'pregnancy pact' high school. Job offers by Trojan and Durex to follow
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
If your husband comes home and finds you in bed with your lover, and your lover freaks out, jumps through a window and leaves his car in your driveway, don't make things worse by claiming he was a home invasion suspect
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
How weird is Portland? Let's put it this way: one of its residents is giving the city itself acupuncture by hammering 23-foot long needles into the ground
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Todaysthv)
 
 
 
Shots fired at Democrat Party HQ in Arkansas. Gunman on the loose
source: todaysthv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(691)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Man wrongly accused of 1992 murder awarded £706,000, which may be reduced by 25% if he was drunk at the time
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Fidel Castro turns 82* today
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
In response to recent violence, authorities have imposed a 24-hour curfew on the city, enforced by roadblocks manned by paramilitary forces carrying M-16s and M-4s. Is this a) Baghdad, Iraq, b) Tbilisi, Georgia, or c) Helena, Arkansas?
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(424)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Prolific Los Angeles thief who confessed to over 1,000 burglaries finds a creative way to get his sentence reduced...he makes a police training video showing how he did it
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man cheats on his wife, sends a sexy text message to the wrong person, and his mistress's underwear ends up for auction on ebay. Ta daa
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(218)
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
Newspaper reporter huffy that man who took bath in Burger King sink is too busy updating his MySpace profile to give an interview. On the upside, video on the paper's website has "has received thousands of viewers from Finland"
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Some Wachovia Guy)
 
 
 
Bank of America special: free exploding dye pack with every cash withdrawal
source: wavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Cushman Collection)
 
 
 
Now look here, ace, it's the coolest collection of early-40's color photos of New York you've seen since the early 40's
source: webapp1.dlib.indiana.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(299)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Unforeseen consequences of the energy crisis
source: images.search.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Debunking three myths about offshore drilling
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(415)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
For those who bought their first house in the past 5-7 years, analysts now predicting resurgence of "down payment" which is some sort of rip-off where they expect you to pay some cash up front. Whateva
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(300)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
An iFire damages buildings at Apple's headquarters; 2.0 people escaped without injury
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
MD senator helps pass legislation to collect money to enforce the Do Not Call registry. Now his son is sued for $500m under legislation. That's gonna make Thanksgiving dinner awkward
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Humpback whale took a detour on his way to the Arctic and ended up near one of Germany's favorite nude beach destinations. That pervert
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
Georgia beats Russia - at beach volleyball. If only all wars could be settled by attractive women in bikinis
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Phone sex addict goes to hotel, makes over €7,000 in phone sex calls that he can't afford. Again
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Sex in a judge's chambers, trysts at local hotels during business hours, obscene phone calls to female workers and a desire to see lesbian sex. It's just another day for a court official. Submitter contemplating career change
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(WorldNetDaily)
 
 
 
VFW post answering machine tells callers to hang up if they don't speak English. One small detail seems to have escaped them
source: worldnetdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(576)
 
(Seacoastonline.com)
 
 
 
A man was arrested for having contact with a woman he had assaulted previously. The contact came when she knocked on his door and he called the police to have her removed
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
You're getting your hair cut and notice that the nude calendar on the wall features your girlfriend. Do you c) burn the place down? Hells yeah you do
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(249)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Finally, a case worthy of the U.S. Supreme Court's time: whether a 5th grader's candy canes are religiously offensive
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Chicago streets are congested and gas prices are at all time highs. So it only makes sense that the Chicago PD replaces their Crown Vics with Chevy Tahoes
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
New study confirms what the previous 7,689 studies had found: Troops at risk for alcohol abuse
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
No matter how turned on you are, it's just rude to masturbate outside a strip club. "There were people standing around watching him and laughing."
source: argusleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Being held captive for 3 years is pretty bad, but in a single-wide mobile home? That's a new kind of hell
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Traditional English names like Gertrude and Edna dying out. Tula Does the Hula From Hawaii unavailable for comment
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
With the smell of the burning sacred weed "wafting out the window", Reverend Cannabis is busted again
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Happy Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these two tater launchers gearing up for a spudtacular fling together
source: electricmist.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(WCCO.com)
 
 
 
Doctor, "Some risks of surgery include nausea and dizziness." Patient, "Not bad, is there anything else?" Doctor, "Well, your face might catch on fire."
source: wcco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Bad: You get your wallet stolen while you're in gym class. Good: Someone later finds and returns it. Fark: 44 years later
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
78 year-old naked man defeats two burglars, taking away their shotgun. Bet they didn't expect that wrinkle
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
When the police take all of your kids, dogs, cats, horses, donkeys, pigs, chickens, ducks, goats, pigeons, peafowl, mice, and hamsters away, you might not have the best day. But come on, did they have to take the fish, too? Bonus: sexy mugshot
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Homeland Security setting up counterspy unit... that will be like the C.I.A., but with a much better and longer name
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Study from the Researches For Pointless Things finds that an octopus has 2 legs and 6 arms
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Step 1: Be charged with murder in the starvation death of your daughter. Step 2: Sue the city for not taking your child away from you. Step 3: Profit
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Don't worry UK Farkers, soon companies will be required to track and store all internet and phone traffic from everyone so it can be accessed by a variety of agencies for your safety
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 


Tue August 12, 2008
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
If you're forced to land your plane on a freeway and do so safely, it might be best not to push your luck and try to take off again
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Having solved all other problems Baltimore to educate inner city residents of the dangers of salt
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
NYPD wants to take pictures of every car license plate entering the city, good luck with that
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(City Pages)
 
 
 
Last month: Tron Guy buys an airplane. This month: Tron Guy is a gay man who hates the government, owns an AK-47, and lives with a furry named "Orven the Ox"
source: citypages.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(635)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this light lunch
source: solanomag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Man who left an engagement ring on the hood of his car and then drove off gets lucky twice: A motorcyclist found the ring, and the fiance still wants to marry the idiot
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Number of college students receiving food stamps up 44% from last year
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(190)
 
(Cryptomundo.com)
 
 
 
Apparently, someone has found a bigfoot body and evidence of its existence will be revealed to the world on Friday
source: cryptomundo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(210)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Texas school district may have carried school dress code one step too far: Prison-issue jumpsuits for children who don't comply
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Unabomber angry that his Montana cabin is on display at a Washington, D.C. museum. He's worried the publicity will further harm his victims
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Today's "oh noes teh eval bacterias could harm ur children" story brought to you by the Cleveland Plain Dealer. With "kids need sleep" bonus obviousness
source: blog.cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you want to claim disability benefits for a spinal injury, it's not advised that you leap around on stage playing guitar
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Birmingham, England prints flyer with Birmingham, AL skyline. Send more maps to the England, and such as
source: blog.al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Attorney general: "Not every violation of the law is a crime." At least not when you're a Republican
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(169)
 
(WHTM)
 
 
 
Telemarketer: "Ha ha, we will defeat the Do Not Call list by using an Indian call center Suck it, consumer protection statutes" Pennsylvania Attorney General: "Hi, welcome to our state. Here's a $500,000,000 lawsuit."
source: whtm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(162)
 
(Radar Magazine)
 
 
 
Turns out that Beyonce's skin does change color when her L'Oreal ad is placed in newspapers for black women: It gets darker (pic)
source: radaronline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Man, shot by one of his roommate's friends, claims that he "was fighting and that's what dudes do"
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Plane crashes in supermarket parking lot. Clean up in aisles 1-15
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
American Airlines supports the troops -- for an extra $300 charge per duffel bag, that is
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
10:17 a.m. -- tried the cheese curds, needs more gravy. 10:20 a.m. -- the elephant ears are soggy this year. 10:30 a.m. -- waited in line for half an hour to ride a roller coaster from the 1960s
source: blogs.thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
If you can't beat them on the battlefield, beat them in court: Georgia to sue Russia for ethnic cleansing, will use high-technology trial lawyers provided by the U.S.
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
AG Mukasey says that nobody involved in politicizing the hiring process will face any criminal consequences. Instead, they will face the wrath that DOJ inflicts on all the innocent people they investigate: Bad publicity
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Burger King employee -- caught taking a nude bath in restaurant's utility sink -- gives himself the most appropriate nickname ever: "Mr. Unstable." Or, as his friends call him, "Mr. Unemployed"
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Beware of goat-sucking dogs in Texas (with video goodness)
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(eurogamer .net)
 
 
 
Atheists outraged that "Spore" has religion in it. Then again, is there anything that doesn't outrage atheists?
source: eurogamer.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(863)
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Actor Ian Ziering says appearing on the new "90210" would be a "step backwards" in his career, since he's really more focused on moving from the grill to night assistant manager in his current job
source: tvwatch.people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Looks like the United States isn't the only country who uses cute females to lip-synch vocals
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(166)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Swedish authorities say, "Go ahead and name your kids Budweiser, but naming them Devil is still banned." In other words, no truth in advertising
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
One, ah ah ah. Two, ah ah ah. Three, ah ah ah. Four, ah ah ah. Four young white women in McCain's attack ad. Now let's count the ulterior motives. One, ah ah ah... (443)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Humpbacks have made a great recovery, which means Kirk and Spock won't have to time travel when that weird alien probe makes its way to Earth
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Court cuts rape victim's compensation because she was asking for it since she had been drinking
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(417)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
For sale: Sunny, spacious 375-sq. ft. penthouse studio in central Stockholm, balcony, full kitchen, all amenities. No extra charge for crazy old man who refuses to leave
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Sports Illustrated does the numbers and proves what everyone outside of the Big Ten already knew: the SEC is the best conference for the last 5 years in college football
source: sportsillustrated.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(353)
 
(The Daily Press)
 
 
 
In a surprise ruling, judge concludes that first amendment protection must also be extended to Christians
source: dailypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(401)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
*clicks BBC front page headline* Wait, what? *facepalm*
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(204)
 
(Some Straight Dude)
 
 
 
Cheech & Chong's career swings match S&P 500. Causation or correlation?
source: minyanville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
When the sun comes up on a sleepy little town, down around San Antone, Squeaky the Pig is herding up the cows, with Dr. Pepper and marshmallows
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Man robs a bank dressesd in a wig, makeup and women's clothing. Would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for his huge-ass proboscis. "His wig couldn't cover his nose"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Anonymous Chinese Olympic ceremony worker dubbed "Second Brother on the Right" becomes Internet sensation, standard police-lineup response
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Original SS Minnow restoration nearly finished, will take passengers on three-hour tours. No really, three-hour tours
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Cult leaders denied 19-month-old food because he wouldn't say "amen" after dinner. Kept his body in a suitcase that they would spray because God was going to resurrect him. Prosecutors expect a conviction to be a Febreze
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(348)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Shanghai tower
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Israel offers Palestinians 92.7 percent of the West Bank. Palestinians refuse, prefer to wait until even more of their land is built over
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(836)
 
(RealClearPolitics)
 
 
 
Bill Richardson (D-oh) has just the thing to stop the war in Georgia: A strongly worded UN resolution. "Apparently Richardson was ambassador to the UN for 19 months without noticing that Russia has a Security Council veto"
source: realclearpolitics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Bonsai cattle catching on with ranchers, although the high-pitched mooing takes some getting used to
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Oldham Evening Chronicle)
 
 
 
Couple spotted naked at a window displaying a little too much unity at the offices of Unity Partnership
source: oldham-chronicle.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Not news: Police raid house looking for fugitive. News: The wrong house. Fark: Leave a note to homeowner with refrigerator magnets (with bonus totally-not-amused pic)
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Man not particularly bothered after discovering three-foot rubber snake that's been in his car for a month is not made of rubber
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
A bunch of grapes has sold for around $900 (about $30 per grape) in Japan. "They're delicious, sweet AND fresh at the same time," the grocer explained wide-eyed, while attempting to hypnotise the journalist
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Pommel-horse performance by Olympic alternate gives USA the surprise bronze in gymnastics, gives Hollywood the idea to make "Gymkata 2"
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(252)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
New study proves that unmarried men lead just as healthy lives as their married counterparts, despite being miserable and lonely and sexless. The married ones, I mean
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(350)
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Mugger arrested despite cunning Winnie the Pooh disguise. Oh bother
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Two-thirds of U.S. companies pay zero federal income taxes, claim it's still too much
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(375)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Reminder: Minneapolis Fark party this Saturday. Twins v. Mariners at 2:55, followed by Mortimer's at 7:00
source: maps.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Two men die after drinking alcohol handwash. Guess their nationality
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Georgia: Hey, guys. Just because Russia says they stop bombing us doesn't actually mean they have stopped bombing us
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(269)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New book on strange ways to meet your maker includes getting hit by flying champagne corks, being crushed by falling vending machines and falling out your window playing air guitar. Death by snu snu conspicuously absent
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Running can slow the aging process while making you feel like a 90-year-old emphysema sufferer
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(216)
 
(Foobies)
 
 
 
Drug-addicted homeless guy who slept nine years in a luggage locker at a train station will be punished with a much larger place to sleep and hot meals
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
♫ Hey Amidala what have you done? Hey Adm'ral Akbar who's the only one? Hey little Yoda this bond you must tap, don't you tell Ackbar that it's all a trap... It's a nice day for a geek wedding ♪
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(News24)
 
 
 
Council organises party for youth to get away from beer. This is Fark, so you can guess what happened
source: news24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Corpse)
 
 
 
Colorado Springs considering allowing "green" funerals, in which the deceased would be buried in a bag, an egg-carton box or a wicker basket. "Frozen in carbonite" option strangely absent
source: kjct8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Western theme park owner pleads not guilty after forgetting to mention that he keeps real bullets next to the fake ones
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(KTLA.com)
 
 
 
Stockton store sees sadistic swordsman summarily swinging saber sans sanity. Sagacious sentries stun, shoot scumbag. (Suspect's scary snapshot shown)
source: ktla.trb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this group of robots
source: orble.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Detroit News)
 
 
 
You know your city has problems when even the dead flee to the suburbs
source: detnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(NECN.com)
 
NewsFlash
 
Russian President Medvedev orders halt to military action in Georgia while Putin drinks glass of water
source: necn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(296)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Bush to "relax" protected species rules, by allowing developers to decide on endangered status instead of scientists. Fark: Really
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(522)
 
(The Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
If you're going to rob a store at gunpoint, it might help to actually follow the manager back into the store so he doesn't lock you outside
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
PETA wants permission to put signs on border fences letting illegals know there's something worse than the Border Patrol: The American diet
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
New York's "preppie killer" pops collar, returns to jail
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Actual headline: Woman sues for right to massage horses
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Your goth and fetish convention may have jumped the shark when guy known as "TheOneFonz" can't (pics)
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman gets kicked out of Kentucky mall because of her dress. "My outfit was too provocative and people's husbands was looking at me." (With pic of dress)
source: wkyt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(409)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
From Stroh's to Shiner Bock, from Hamm's to Hudepohl, enjoy this incomplete, biased guide to this great piss-beer nation
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(196)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
When officials deny your entry at the border, tell them about your bomb, that always works
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 


Mon August 11, 2008
(CNN)
 
 
 
Professor who chairs the Department of Metaphors says she prefers climbing Half Dome Mountain to sex
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this old ticker machine
source: lostwackys.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: Catching a stingray. News: A 3000 lbs, 16.5 foot wide stingray (w/ pic)
source: weirdasianews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(205)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Stripper tells police her boyfriend actually stabbed himself twice in his lower back
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Police seek man with fake 'Age Verification Unit' badge who tried to get free porn, suspect may need 'Inmate Unit Verification' badge in jail
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(29)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"The Russians -- in a stunning piece of irony -- have twice bombed the Su-25 Frogfoot manufacturing plant"... with a Su-25 Frogfoot
source: aviationnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(216)
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Woman intentionally hits bicyclist with her car, commandeers another car and runs into her own car with it, then drives into a fence, gets out of the car, and starts running around in circles taking off all her clothes. The Aristocrats
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Giant flying inflatable dog turd breaks loose, causes chaos at Swiss museum exhibition. The turd was named "Complex Shiat" and is the size of a house. Poop
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
New Yorker disappointed to discover that effective use of the casting couch requires one to be a casting director
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Breitbart.com)