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Sun April 27, 2008
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(London Times)
 
 
 
"It's a myth that the world's oil is running out. Production of oil is being constrained by several forces, none of them due to God's failure to put enough of the black gold under our feet."
source: business.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Ugly ass baby elephant makes debut at Maryland Zoo. The Sun is there. The Baltimore one
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Today's "he had nothing else to do all night and licked it until he destroyed it" story is about a giraffe's tongue taking out a webcam set up to stream other giraffes
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
The East Coast-West Coast feud heats up as sharks attack surfers off the Florida coast
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Sure, Ronald Reagan helped, but the man who really destroyed communism was J.R. Ewing
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Hungry San Diego shark sets California wildfire to force more tasty humans into the sea
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
TFer needs to make valedictorian speech in May, help him out by leaving one nugget of wisdom to pass onto class. Voting enabled, LGN
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Actor who parodied Arizona's Sheriff Joe Arpaio in political ads before getting arrested on trumped-up charges wins $125,000 settlement from Maricopa County
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mobile Press-Register)
 
 
 
Nutty and probably drunk, Panhandle Floridians gather at a bar to fling mullet (the fish, not the hairstyle) across the border to Alabama
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Eight-year old's "to do" list for today: play on the swings, color, do math homework, get a divorce, watch dora the explor.....wait.....WHAT?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Weekly Standard)
 
 
 
How we'll know when we've won: A definition of success in Iraq
source: weeklystandard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop babysuit man
source: joe-ks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
"Self-described activist who bikes through town wearing only pasties and a G-string has some fans" (w/ pic)
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Group wants to make eastern Oregon its own state. Utardaho?
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Man armed with authentic-looking pistol charges police, becomes authentic-looking corpse
source: komotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Submitter wants to try listening to some blues, but there's just so much. Recommendations? The more specific the better
source: google.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Amazon)
 
 
 
Sure it's expensive, but it *does* have a 4/5 rating
source: amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OhGizmo!)
 
 
 
Man gets incredible Spiderman tattoo, is in for one heck of a hangover
source: ohgizmo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Royal Caribbean kicks family off the ship and leaves them stranded in Nassau with no passports and in their pajamas because their baby was sick
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Dunkin' Donuts makes new empoyees sign an agreement saying that they can fire the employee for any reason -- even though they can't
source: bangornews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(dailyindia.com)
 
 
 
Japanese whisky has been voted the best in the world. Angry Scots reach for the blue paint and get their headbutting faces on
source: dailyindia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
While attending 2008 Summer Olympics, don't forget to stop in at Beijing's exclusive, gourmet penis restaurant
source: travel.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Mentally disabled guy sues for pain and humiliation after cops put lampshade on his head and make him think it's a lie detector test
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Woman who had phone sex with a man claims he raped her... over the phone. Man says that is impossible, he doesn't even work for Verizon
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Excuse me, sir, weren't you the guy we just ticketed for drunk driving a couple minutes ago? Just over there?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Helicopters search for great white shark that killed triathlete. Have managed to narrow likely habitat down to "the ocean"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
School issued old-fashioned calculator that lacked standard function for assessment test. Hopefully they get to the of the problem
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Chanel's top fashion designer wants Kurt Cobain's daughter to be the face of the new Chanel campaign. This news probably would have blown Kurt's mind
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this whacking gizmo
source: gizoo.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Smelly check causes bank evacuation and hazmat response
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Britons suffering skin cancer epidemic. The sun is there
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
More and more women are hosting and attending Taser parties. The news comes as a shock to Tupperware
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Justice department to Congress: The CIA is above the law
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Perhaps the overcrowding is not the prison's biggest problem. It may be that inmates have access to guns, machetes, and knives
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Friendly tip: Wait until AFTER you land before smoking some of the 440 pounds of hash you're smuggling
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Reflector)
 
 
 
North Carolina recalls license plates beginning with XXX
source: reflector.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Marine can't attend girlfriend's school dance because "21 is the legal age for alcohol consumption." Support the troops, but not on prom night
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
England imports rabid dogs from Sri Lanka, with predictable results
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Photos show lighter side of WWII; "With the exception of the Germans in uniform, you can hardly see any difference from daily life now." France surrenders
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PhillyBurbs)
 
 
 
Property values down? Don't worry, towns are now being ordered to raise taxes
source: phillyburbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Three quarters of Swedish high school students don't know which country Teheran is in. Ayatollah you once, ayatollah you a hundred times
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tricorned seafarer
source: lensimpressions.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Orlando)
 
 
 
Following the school district's implementation of a uniform policy, parents complained that they can't afford uniforms, principal fights back sending an email saying that they should think about their child's education
source: myfoxorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 26, 2008
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Poll finds that 65% of women have eating disorders, with the dominant problem being "stuff fattening food in your piehole until your ass is as big as a '73 Winnebago." Well, that's the medical definition, anyway
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(San Francisco 49ers)
 
 
 
Norfolk, VA considers lowering academic requirement for freshman athletes because that 2.0 average is proving to be a high hurdle to clear
source: hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
California college students protest proposed beer tax: "No taxation on intoxication"
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Rapidly dying hepatitis C patient denied transplant because he had previously smoked marijuana... that the hospital legally gave him for medicinal purposes
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Dear Abby, I have a really hilarious idea for a YouTube video (Yahoo deleted it, but contents pasted in the first post. LGT thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press-Enterprise (So. Cal))
 
 
 
Paddleboarders return to water day after fatal great white shark attack. "We want all the tourists to know the water is safe in Solana Beach," says Mayor Larry Vaughan
source: pe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Vice Presid..er.... New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson to go to Venezuela to help get hostages freed
source: afp.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
In all the mattress factories, in all the towns, in all the world, she sets fire to mine
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Substitute teaching? check. Bragging to the class that you have warrants? check. Getting arrested in front of the class? Oh, that's a big ol' check
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
They pull a knife, you pull a gun. They pull a gun, you pull a BIGGER gun. That's the Chicago way. Chicago cops being issued M4 assault rifles to even the odds against cougars, unarmed civilians
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
"If it floats, flies or fornicates, you are better off buying; but if it barks, reach for the rental agreement"
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press-Enterprise (So. Cal))
 
 
 
Female high school teacher pleads guilty after she and her twin sister cover up affair with 16-year old female student (with pics)
source: pe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Muggers sick of getting their asses handed to them by retirees give up on the elderly, mug a 6-year old instead (with dazzling mugshot)
source: blogs.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Bitter 10-month-old clings to guns in Illinois after being issued a gun permit. "There is nothing in the FOID Act or any of the rules that says anything about age restrictions"
source: blogs.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy lifter
source: cdn.overstock.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Using DNA database to identify criminals. New hotness: Using DNA database to identify relatives of criminals
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Virginia Gazette)
 
 
 
"I opened it, put it in the player and went into the kitchen. I heard my son scream, and when I went to check on him, instead of Batman the screen had three men on it, one of whom had no pants on."
source: vagazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Demonstrating their keen understanding of economics, SF faithful gather at Chevron station to pray for lower gas prices
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4.com)
 
 
 
Man trimming trees in his backyard discovers skeleton hanging from branches
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
The Massachusetts Turnpike is not running a speed trap. The extra police patrols, speeding tickets, and the line item in the budget requiring increased ticket revenue are just a coincidence
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Motorists in the UK over the age of 75 face compulsory tests of their eyesight and ability to drive, help them stay off your lawn
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
More words that don't belong together: itchy hemp lingerie
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Atheist soldier is sent home from Iraq early because of threats to his life.....from other U.S. soldiers
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Think your job sucks? Try manually scanning every page of every book ever written. "It is monotonous." says one worker, in the understatement of the millenium
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Victorville Daily Press)
 
 
 
Firefighters unable to save house because copper fittings worth mere $8 had been stolen from all five fire hydrants on block
source: vvdailypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Armed police called to a man wearing a mask and with a running chainsaw walking the streets. Turns out he was going to a fancy dress party. Now attending with brown trousers presumably
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Seven-year old boy steals SUV, takes goes on an eight minute joyride leaving smashed cars, mailboxes, signs in his wake. That's some good parenting right there
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Swinger's club shut down; not because it's a swinger's club, but because it's a commercial establishment in a residential area
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Progressive)
 
 
 
The Pledge Of Allegiance recited in Spanish one school day results in physical threats, harassment, and demands for the teacher, the principal, and the superintendent to be fired. Stay classy, Wisconsin
source: progressive.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Seattle police have arrested two men and a boy suspected in a string of BB shootings that left a man injured and a duck dead. Police describe the attacks as ditttthhhhpiccable
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
WWII bomb washes up on a beach. Navy takes it out to sea to detonate it, promptly loses it. D'oh
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Russian woman claims to have photographed a UFO in England. The Sun is there with grainy photo of . . . a flying mushroom?
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Residents in Seattle's affluent Magnolia neighborhood are fuming over plans to house homeless people there. Bonus: the closest grocery sells pheasant-and-rosemary pâté for $9.99 and ground coffee for up to $18 a pound
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slashdot)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Unreleased Atari 2600 games
source: games.slashdot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Not News: A City banker gives up a high paying job to become a carpenter. Fark: Finds out he is allergic to wood
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Record (UK))
 
 
 
Crazed Chinese chef challenges boss who just fired him to a duel - with cleavers. Christopher Moltisanti options the film rights
source: dailyrecord.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Japanese government, unfamiliar with Project Mayhem, orders Ikea to improve its product manuals after man nearly blinded himself while assembling chest of drawers
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KMPH.com)
 
 
 
And so it begins: cat scratches driver's face, causes car wreck. Happy Caturday
source: kmph.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Journalist: gets farked by boss for $30/hour, will work until age 65. Prostitute: gets farked by regular clients for $500/hour, retired by age 29, rich and writing a how-to guide for prostitution
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Desert Sun)
 
 
 
Not news: Police install "amnesty cans" outside Coachella Music Festival to give concert-goers one last chance to ditch pot, pills and other drugs, penalty-free. Fark: It works
source: mydesert.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Even God hates "Christian Rock"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Cheerleaders may be banned from cricket matches in India. "These are things meant for foreigners and not us. Mothers and daughters watch these matches on television and it does not look nice."
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Attention Toronto residents: TTC now means "take the car"
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Obama wins by 10 points in Indiana
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
More than half of Londoners have found love in the underground railway system. It probably helps that it's dark
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Record (UK))
 
 
 
Not news: man in jail. News: man breaks out of jail. Fark: For four minutes
source: dailyrecord.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Abstract
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
On this very special episode of Dumbass the Movie, Cindy Sheehan files to take on Pelosi and move to Washington DC. (Bonus: already endorsed by Ted McGinley)
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NWA Morning News)
 
 
 
Most people would be happy to have their weight go from 413 to 308 in 8 months. But when it happens in jail you can sue the sheriff and claim starvation
source: nwaonline.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
To combat binge-drinking, one city plans to introduce "pub angels" who will go from bar to bar making sure bartenders don't overserve and patrons don't overdrink
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 25, 2008
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Elderly driver, unable to see over the steering wheel, with his blinker on for the last 20 miles, going 35 mph in the left hand lane, makes it past security and onto the tarmac at major airport
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Being famous and hounded by paparazzi. New hotness: Being a nobody and paying for the privilege
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
A $300k watch that can't tell time. Quote from salesman "anyone can buy a watch that tells time - only a truly discerning customer can buy one that doesn't." Bonus: Sold out in 48 hours
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Police find drunk driver lying in front seat of car with his pants unbuckled, surrounded by Natural Light beer cans. Also, he was parked in the middle of a creek
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Victorville Daily Press)
 
 
 
Historic gas station on Route 66 re-opens just in time to charge historic gas prices
source: vvdailypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Gator)
 
 
 
Georgia state senator: "A Gator tag will cause accidents. It will lower our quality of life. In fact, my children used to have nightmares because we lived dangerously close to the state of Florida."
source: gainesville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News8Austin)
 
 
 
Central Texas church strikes deal with gas station to sell gas for $2.49 a gallon this Sunday, in what is no way a trick to get you stuck in line with no choice but to be preached to while you wait
source: news8austin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Another week behind us means another round of mugshot goodness
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
Professional panhandler pockets $50 per hour, gets busted by TV reporter
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
A student surely was no quitter / He escaped from jail using Twitter / With one word he was free / There was no time to type three / For he was about to get pounded up the... well, he's free now
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PhotoSig)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sunset reflection
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(quint)
 
 
 
Man training for "shark race" stage of triathlon loses
source: beach.freedomblogging.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Murderers are being acquitted now based on new evidence showing they were just born that way
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
David Rockefeller donated $100 million to Harvard. Just in time too, as they were down to their last $34.9 billion
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Durant Democrat)
 
 
 
Bush Administration finds way to cut cost of war in Iraq: they've quit feeding some soldiers lunch
source: durantdemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
2000 plant marijuana grow operation worth two million dollars uncovered after owner is caught climbing a utility pole and stealing electricity. Dude, you're doing it bong
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
As if Baltimore wasn't rough enough, there's a new danger to add to drugs and drive-bys: Aging pear trees
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Swirling "tornado" of bees menaces diners at a Mexican restaurant. ¡Ay, ay, ay, no es bueno!
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Actual made for Fark headline: "Man denies huffing, caught with gold paint on face"
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAZ West Virginia)
 
 
 
Man uses a West Virginia taser, a.k.a. a cinderblock, to break up fight between brothers
source: wsaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Red Bull to discontinue current ad campaign after a supermarket worker drank four cans and got his wings
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Montreal student fined $628 for sitting on a ledge in a public park. The fact that he was taking pictures of cops hassling someone else immediately prior had absolutely nothing to do with it
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man tries to get a deal on an LCD television by switching the price tag with one on a $3.16 bottle of water with the expectation that nobody would notice
source: kirksvilledailyexpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wtkr.com)
 
 
 
If you are shoplifting, get busted and decide to run away, at the very least take the two-year old with you
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Good Swimmer)
 
 
 
After the devastating floods of Hurricane Katrina, the US Corps of Engineers is doing everything possible to ensure the levees around New Orleans don't fail again. Just kidding, they stuffed gaps in the floodwalls with newspaper
source: wwltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Bush stimulus comes early, doesn't even spoon before leaving
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Teacher busted for smoking pot on the job. School officials became suspicious when snack time lasted four hours
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
US: Iranian arms found in Iraq -- no word yet on legs
source: online.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Neocon war architect who was in charge of Pentagon intelligence group designed to procure only pro-invasion intelligence blames Colin Powell for Iraq clusterfark
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Like most stories that end up with a man mowing his friend's lawn in a dress, it started out innocently enough"
source: beta.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
"Ok, Rover, HEEL. Good dog, good dog. Now FOOT. Good dog"
source: blog.cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Former prostitute publishes internet escort's handbook for aspiring call girls. Velvet Jones files copyright infringement lawsuit
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Paraplegic golfer gets hole-in-one. Some guys have all the luck
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Finally, a website for something that matters: finding a good beer in NYC
source: blog.wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
"Brazil gives up on priest carried off by balloons"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Boston Fark Party TONIGHT 7:00 p.m. Kenmore Sq. Drew will be there. DIT
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pet waste, toilet seats, doll heads, 8-track tapes, police caution tape: Crack house or Jersey Shore? Obvious tag should tip you off
source: cleanoceanaction.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Dallas)
 
 
 
You see a serviceman in uniform writhing on the sidewalk, having a seizure. Do you a) try to comfort him and keep him still until it passes, b) alert passersby and call 911 for help, or c) take off with his wallet?
source: myfoxdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
"wots happng, r u redy 2 go?" "yep cum now we r redy 2 go." "ha ha dumba55"
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
In heist of the year, robber makes off with empty wallet and heart medication
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
What better way to prove you once had consensual sex with your ex-wife than by showing a homemade video to her new husband
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
US ship fires on Iranian boat in the Persian Gulf of Tonkin
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Before starting an organization to help bring people together, make sure that you double-check the meaning of the acronym. This is especially true if the name of the organization is Uniting Friends In America
source: twittertravels.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Dog)
 
 
 
I am the Lord your Dog, thou shalt have no other dogs before me. Thou shalt honor thy stud and thy biatch and thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's steak nor his chew-toys
source: hs.fi   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Kid charged with reckless driving on high school campus. In his motorized wheelchair
source: cw2.trb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Man who lost his license for driving drunk is killed by drunk driver while bicycling
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
NYPD detectives acquitted in Sean Bell shooting. This will end well
source: ny1.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slippery Slag)
 
 
 
Photoshop this slag glass
source: colemanquartz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
The fledgling Iraqi forces have skipped 'standing up' and moved straight on to 'running away'
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mutant dog-eating squirrels invade English county. Naturally, the Daily Mail is there to denounce this latest wave of immigration
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Happy ANZAC day to all you Aussie and Kiwi Farkers. Remember them all with pride
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Guy in town to donate part of his liver to Mum gets busted for not paying for a pizza in 1992
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
There are lots of things you can do while holding a hostage at gunpoint during a carjacking, but asking a television news crew for directions shouldn't be one of them
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Cheapskate)
 
 
 
One sure sign you're doing it wrong: Robbing a dollar store
source: macon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption this screwed guy
source: i238.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
When signing up women for new cell phone service, don't forget to add value to the deal by sending nude pics of yourself to their new phones
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Human line split 100,000 years ago into red tribes and blue tribes
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Pass me another beer, honey, the bath is getting low
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(kwtv)
 
 
 
You know the Oklahoma City lose weight initiative isn't going well when the mayor partners with Taco Bell
source: news9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DARPA)
 
 
 
Old but cute-ass BALD penguin gets special wet suit that helps his hair grow back (with slideshow)
source: nbc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(adn.com)
 
 
 
If you are going to make concrete barricades for a senior prank, it helps to know how to actually make concrete; also helps to know it may be a felony
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Firefighters rescue two canines from burning house. Your doggggggggg... will aaaaalwwwayyyys...love YOUUUUUU
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
If you are going to grab a woman's ass in the airport, first make sure she's not a lawyer who is also the daughter of the governor
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Nerd)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Bendix G-15
source: i43.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Drug dealers are breaking into a prison to sell their goods to inmates who get breakfast in bed, satellite TV, and free phone calls
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Drunk woman almost successfully leaps backyard pool in her SUV (w/ pic). "I said, 'ma'am, you can't leave, your truck is in my pool. She said, 'I can get it out'"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
To be or not to be, innit: Shakespeare gets a chav makeover. Shakespeare rotating in his grave muttering, oh woe is me, innit
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Latest trend in funerals: Covering coffins in tacky stickers. w/pics
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stabby McStabberson)
 
 
 
Having a beer with girlfriends: $20. Take-out for a night of TV: $30. Watching "America's Next Top Model" with friends: Stabbin'
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"The law says a closed bathroom stall is a place set aside for disrobing and masturbation" and other jewels in Florida's latest sex sting
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Mother convicted for child abuse after she took her three children to at least 500 unnecessary appointments with doctors during a 10-year period, including major surgeries
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 24, 2008
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Actual first sentence from article: "David Allen Chapin, who ate the brain of his roommate after he shot him 30 years ago in an argument over whose religion was best, is up for parole in June"
source: news.enquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Assume that's your boyfriend acting in the porno movie you're watching together? That's a stabbin'
source: kob.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Press Democrat)
 
 
 
If you robbed a Brinks armored car with a weed whacker, the police would like a word with you
source: www1.pressdemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The parents of two young boys fighting over a David Beckham jersey did the sensible thing and retained lawyers
source: honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Police release surveillance photos of man doing a pretty nice impression of Carl Spackler. Unknown if he was hollering "It's in the hole"
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Seattle-area man pays $52 for last Snickers bar purchased from defunct bowling alley's vending machine. Great Googly Moogly, indeed
source: blog.seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
The Pew Internet and American Life Project found that emoticons are creeping into school assignments. Pew Pew Pew
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Tennessee taxes iTunes downloads for four months and no one notices
source: politics.nashvillepost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Herald Tribune)
 
 
 
Teachers strike closes British schools as teachers protest over pay, economy, lack of hot students
source: iht.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(3TV)
 
 
 
Federal agents may start using paintball guns to defend the border
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Who would have thought that as recently as 70,000 years ago, extremes of climate had reduced our population to such small numbers that we were on the very edge of extinction?" Early humans must've driven Hummers, too
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Students get suspended over swords. New hotness: They bought 18-inch LOTR replicas in London while 4,000 miles from school
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Justice Scalia on Bush v. Gore decision: "Get over it"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Wesley Snipes sentenced to 3 years in prison. 1 for each Blade movie
source: afp.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Remember everyone up in arms against the "ozone hole?" Well, a recovered ozone hole now leads to more global warming. Good job, hippies
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Guy who sold guns to V-Tech shooter visits V-Tech to...wait for it...sell guns
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Quote from America's so-called worst mom: "As if keeping kids under lock and key and helmet and cell phone and nanny and surveillance is the right way to rear kids. It's not. It's debilitating-for us and for them."
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSB Radio)
 
 
 
Grandson of Chick-Fil-A founder arrested after he walks into a Waffle House, locks himself in the john, gets naked, trashes the room, floods it, then gets maced by police who forced their way in. The Aristocrats
source: wsbradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Not news: 19-year-old charged in shooting. Fark: Duck in serious condition at local animal hospital
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you're a DARE officer, you probably shouldn't get caught making a drug deal with a police informant while on duty
source: thetowntalk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politicker NJ)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Hittable teacher sex scandal. New hotness: Hittable teacher cocaine scandal
source: knbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
The medical myth that carrots can improve your eyesight has been proven false by a husband with really good aim
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Teens tired of waiting in the drive-through line rob the guy in front of them for his hamburgers. Will gladly pay Tuesday for an attorney today
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Panel finds West Virginia University improperly granted degree to governor's daughter, citing she sent in only 38 of the 40 boxtops required for an MBA
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this old window
source: koepenick.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Politico)
 
 
 
Having honed his debate skills in fark political flamewars, TFer POAC is running for state representative
source: templeton4staterep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Van full of mental patients crashes near Pittsburgh. In other news, the Ron Paul rally has been cancelled due to poor attendance
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Boston.com)
 
 
 
TV station executive goes on drunken tirade at airport, attempts to play "don't you know who I am?" card. With hilarious results
source: wbztv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Bush confident there will be a Palestinian state by the end of his term, and it wil be guarded by gnomes and wizards and bears with lasers
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Los Angeles is a third world city
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
It's official: Tyrannosaurus Rex tastes like chicken
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Boston's solution to the housing crisis: Force lenders who foreclose on homes to rent those seized houses back to the occupants -- the same occupants who weren't paying the mortgage
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
For the DVD release of "Charlie Wilson's War," Fark interviews the Charlie Wilson but not his war
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
News: Man charged for street racing. Fark: In a garbage truck
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Adults re-create childhood photos
source: colorwar2008.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Press)
 
 
 
Today's "high school assistant basketball coach caught having sex with one of her players" story brought to you by Norfolk, VA
source: dailypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNSNews)
 
 
 
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi honors Earth Day with a biblical quote. She didn't use the King James version of the Bible, but the Making It Up version instead
source: cnsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Terrell Owens' attorney defends T.O.'s reputation by confirming it is him in the BangBros porn shoot
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
The Clash's Mick Jones to write song about "Don't tase me, bro" arrest: "It's gonna go like this, dun-dun-dun ... Aaaargh"
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Complaining and running to government to solve every problem. New hotness: Busting your butt and doing something about it
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SuperDeluxe)
 
 
 
It's a fun game to play with the ladies, if only for the conjugal visits
source: superdeluxe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Blog)
 
 
 
Shocked, absolutely SHOCKED to find out that Hillary didn't raise $10 million in the last 24 hours
source: techpresident.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Grandmother of the year says that if second-grade teacher can't take a punch to the face from her eight-year-old grandson, she should find different work
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJLA)
 
 
 
City bought nifty looking electric railcars from Czechs for $10 million three years ago. Stations? Tracks? Your gov't at work
source: wjla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
"Hey Cletus, where can we get some extra money?" "Them gas station vacuum cleaners sure do got lots of coins in em, get your truck and some rope." (With surveillance video goodness)
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Costco joins Sam's Club in rationing the amount of rice a consumer may purchase, but you can still buy all the Eagleburger you can carry
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
The Chinese government has nothing better to do than worry about which dance troupes are performing in Canada
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Boy leaves hospital two weeks after dying"
source: ketv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
$50-per-gold-crown prices prompt spike in sales of old teeth
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Man who denies he slipped Olympic skater a date rape drug admits he took Viagra that evening ... you know, just in case
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Oh Lord, hear our prayer and bring about peace and prosperity and end hunger and poverty. Oh, and if you could roll back gas prices a buck or two while you're at it, that would be great. Amen
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
In character reference letter to judge, Denzel Washington compares his pal Wesley Snipes to "a tree -- a mighty oak." Exactly, trees don't pay taxes either
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
MSNBC: It's not news, it's slideshows of celebrities with bad plastic surgery
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Headline: Tiny mussels pack major financial punch. Get it? Mussels and punch. Literary prize for this guy
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
What is Bill Clinton thinking?
source: graphics8.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
As teenage pregnancies soar, so do the number of grandmothers in their thirties (with hittable GILF pics)
source: mailonsunday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Indian woman believes she has the world's biggest baby. But then you should see the size of her (with pic that would make an onion cry)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Don't worry, lightning never strikes the same place >BANG<
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Spitzer liked to use... props
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Ratings for "American Idol" have dropped seven percent, which means that next season, they'll be broadcasting scenes from the house hot tub and feeding the losers to lions
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bradenton Herald)
 
 
 
First-grader booted for mohawk (with pics)
source: bradenton.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
CNN sued for $1.3 billion by two Chinese women for defaming their lovely country, where the police truncheons are soft and the prisoners are gently harvested for their organs
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
The Sun is on a highly scientific visit to the Arctic to answer such questions as "Have you always wondered whether people still live in igloos?" You can submit your own questions too
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Porn star talks about the differences between sex work and sex not-for-work. Warns that no matter how hard you try everyone you know will eventually find out what you do for a living and how hard you try
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Son advertises for paid drinking companions for his father, gets inundated with offers
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
"Divorce" may not be the main cause of problems in kids. "Being shiatty parents" still in the running, though
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
UK government job centres are running ads for nude webcam operators
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Lou Reed marries Laurie Anderson; wedding song was a critically acclaimed yet unlistenable 18-minute dirge about hipsters in early-70's Soho
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Forget to read miranda to suspect before questionong? No worries, just release them, arrest them later and then their statements are admissable
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4.com)
 
 
 
Step 1: Pimp out deformed cat to the media. Step 2: Remove cat from vet care. Step 3: Profit from farked up viewers' web traffic. It's not news, it's CBS
source: cbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
One hundred sex offenders "missing" in Orlando
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop what happens next
source: mouv4x8.club.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Crooks rig ATM with Eee PC to steal credit card info. Police captures them after one of the morons reports a small car accident at the police station next day
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Police look with suspicion upon woman's claim that tying her husband up and gagging him for 20 hours was consensual when it is revealed she spent that time in a dodgy motel with another man
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Soldiers may face charges for allegedly going to a North Pole massage parlor to take care of their South Poles
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"Blake's Seven" is today's lucky winner in the "Which 70s sci-fi series shall we remake next?" lottery. "ALF," "Metal Mickey" and "Buck Rogers" miss out, but their time will come. Again
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you are going for a new logo, it's a good idea to check it out from all angles before the launch. Penis
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
The combination pipe-bomb factory, cocaine dealership, and chop shop on Salt Lake's west side will be closed tomorrow
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5)
 
 
 
Ebay seller sues man for $10,000 because he left neutral feedback
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Sure, your top-hatted, mustache-twirling landlord may be a jerk. But at least he's not cutting holes in your floor from below and throwing ammonia on your clothes
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
They see me rollin', they hatin'
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politicker NJ)
 
 
 
Immigrant doctors elect to donate 16 free operations in Orange County because "many people in America are also unable to pay for medical care"
source: knbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
"When officers searched the suspect, he was wearing a pink bikini under his street clothes"
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
This week each one of you has a homework assignment: You're gonna go out, you're gonna start a fight with a total stranger, you're gonna start a fight and lose
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Problem: Mother fears estranged father might hurt their child. Solution: Put entire student body of elementary school under lockdown for a week. What have we learned, class?
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FHM (US))
 
 
 
FHM's 100 sexiest women in the world. Surprise: First place goes to a non-Jessica
source: fhmonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCBD)
 
 
 
Cheerleading coach attacked by stun gun. Give me an AAAAAAAAAAA
source: wcbd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
High costs driving airlines to search for new fuel sources like ethanol, used cooking oil, passenger luggage
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
High gas prices force thieves to get creative (with pics)
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 23 Tulsa)
 
 
 
"What do you tell your friends in county jail, where did you get those wounds? I don't know that he's going to tell them he got them from a 95-year-old lady confined to a wheel chair." Tag for 95-year-old lady
source: fox23.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Helicopter parents sue over cell-phone ban that prevents them from talking with their precious snowflake every 10 minutes. Judge's verdict: Suck it
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
World's largest simultaneous Mentos and Diet Coke deployment carried out in Belgium
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If the patient you are tasked with taking care of dies because you absolutely had to go for a hooch run, you may perhaps have a drinking problem
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hot dog vendor
source: storage1.morguefile.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(nwitimes.com)
 
 
 
Candidate rule No. 1: Speak at whatever function you are invited to. Rule No. 2: Ignore swastikas and Hitler's portrait behind the dais. Rule No. 3: FAIL
source: nwitimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 155: "Tangled Up." Details and rules in Boobies. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 23, 2008
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
San Diego mayor sets the record straight. He didn't tell his challenger "fark you, Francis." He used the guy's first name, saying, "fark you, Steve."
source: weblog.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Let's make this perfectly clear. Don't fark with Canada's ability to import strippers
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(St. Joseph News-Press)
 
 
 
Today's Unclear on the Concept Headline Award goes to: "Cinco de Mayo Set for May 2"
source: charleston.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police officer forced to resign for having sex with a prostitute at a building he had been sent to to investigate to see if it was a brothel
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL)
 
 
 
You are upset with the Texas polygamy situation. Do you a) fight it in court b) protest to the media, or c) demand cancellation of Jazz-Rockets playoff games and insist on meeting with the players?
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Government tells brewer he can't call his beer "Weed". Man points out that they may want to talk to Anheuser-Busch about Bud
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
If you left your pet zebra inside Seney Hall at Emory University, Newton County Animal Control would like you to please come pick it up
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Cut in line at Disney and get a beat down - where else but at the Mad Tea Party
source: myfoxtampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Da gubbment)
 
 
 
Because it done be working so good, more NCLB improovements proposed by the Department of Education Department
source: ed.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Update: The "UFOs" in Phoenix were road flares... or maybe that's just what those super-advanced street lights WANT you to think
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Utah company wants to pump water uphill into a reservoir so it can be routed through a hydroelectric dam. For some reason, someone has a problem with this
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Wesley Snipes hopes the combined star power of Denzel Washington, Woody Harrelson and Judge Joe Brown will keep him out of jail
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Florida Senate passes "Academic Freedom Act" allowing teachers to point out flaws in the theory of evolution, cite Floridians as prime example
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
Robert Gates goes off on NATO: "What do you do when, as is the case today with NATO in Afghanistan, some of your allies don't want to fight? Or they impose caveats on where, when and how their forces may be used?"
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
North Korea may have aided Syria with its nuclear program. The nuclear chain mail continues
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
And so it begins: Sam's Club starts rationing bags of rice
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bradenton Herald)
 
 
 
Florida cop, 46, "retires" after girlfriend busts him for having sex in his squad car's back seat
source: bradenton.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Judge, when I was moving my feet under the stall, making noises and masturbating in the Sears bathroom, that was totally not indecent (with mugshot goodness)
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Farkette)
 
 
 
ShinyShiny follow-up to yesterday's Fark bashing. Good news: We farkers and farkettes are "not stupid"
source: shinyshiny.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
There is always room for Jello... unless it is spread across the interstate
source: wtlv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this old Pepsi ad featuring "The Sociables"
source: farm1.static.flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
You find a neighbor dead in his home. Do you: A) Call the police? B) Run away and pretend you didn't see anything? C) Return repeatedly to steal credit cards and check books?
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Tom)
 
 
 
Paper fails to explain Maine's peeping tom bill, article ends up on Fark, hilarity ensues
source: pressherald.mainetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man breaks into car, eats a can of peanuts, passes out (with 25-going-on-45 mugshot)
source: blogs.orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Is it really even a crime to break into your dads house to steal $5 in pennies? (with mugshot goodness)
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass ass born at St. Louis Zoo (with ugly-ass ass pic). Ass
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yale Daily News)
 
 
 
AW'ing Yale art student says her self-induced miscarriages were done "to destabilize the locus of that authorial act, and in doing so, reclaim it from the heteronormative structures that seek to naturalize it." The Aristocrats
source: yaledailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Research asks if men have selective hearing. What's that honey? Huh?
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Star Jones asking for the media to respect her privacy as she seeks to end her marriage. That'd be the same marriage she whored to the media three years ago
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Vicar applies for a drinks licence so he can sell wine and beer at his small village church
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Woman claims Victoria's Secret stole her bra. No picture evidence to support her claim. No bra to support her
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
Google owns domains with variations on google.com to help protect you from nasty redirects, some of which include thesecretofburritos, sexogoogle, or sexpornotits.com. You know... in case you type sexpornotits instead of google
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Jim Davis likes "Garfield without Garfield"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
High school senior prank: Letter sent to parents informing them that condoms will be distributed at prom. Do you: C) Look to find if criminal charges can be made? List your favorite senior pranks
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Senile grandmother used as prop in gangsta video
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
Nervous young man loses $4,000 engagement ring. Stranger finds ring, does what any kind soul would -- wears it a couple days then demands $1,000 to give it back
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
A cache of guns, hundreds of rounds of ammo, cigar tubes and an empty Crown Royale bag -- exactly what you expect to find in your 13-year-old daughter's treehouse
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS3.com)
 
 
 
Why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free? One cop gets the euphemism confused
source: cbs3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Science attempts to explain why you continue to make the same mistakes over and over, without resorting to the "You're a registered Republican" argument
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IBJ)
 
 
 
Conversion van company blames layoffs on UAW strike and not the fact that nobody's bought a conversion van since 1989
source: cms.ibj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WESH Orlando)
 
 
 
It seems the disabled man who got dumped from his wheelchair by deputy is a pretty big douche himself
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Music-News)
 
 
 
Amy Winehouse voted heroin of the year
source: music-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Shirley Temple celebrates her 80th birthday by breaking her arm
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Priest unknowingly blesses strip club, rocks awesome hat/beard combo
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bradenton Herald)
 
 
 
Man on bicycle accused of air conditioner theft, having really strong shoulders
source: bradenton.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
News: "Tribal" tensions between rival ethnic groups keep the fear of race-riots alive. Fark: In Brooklyn
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
"Virtual fence" on Mexican border proves inadequate, much like a "virtual prophylactic"
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Two men in India steal 101 vials of sperm from fertility clinic, learn quickly that there isn't high demand for stolen semen
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
If you don't want to get blamed for covering up 12,000 suicide attempts a year by veterans in your care, don't start your emails with "Shh"
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Woman calls 911 to tell police her CD player was bugged and that her mobile home park was listening to her. With a mugshot that will make you want to call 911 yourself
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
General Petraeus appointed head of all forces in Middle East, to be replaced by Mr. Clean
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KISS957)
 
 
 
In homage to the guy from last week's article, Hartford DJ decides to spend 42 hours in an elevator (vids, pics). Gets bathroom breaks every four hours because the building wouldn't let him pee down the elevator shaft
source: kiss957.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Gas prices are getting so high in NYC that even AAA is telling drivers to use mass transit
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Attention Bluetooth headset-wearers: If you wear that thing in public, this columnist would like you to know that you are a modern-day douchebag
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Man sues Bulls mascot for rough high-five. Bulls unsure when a high-five would have been warranted this year
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Which American cities have the worst teeth in the nation? Well, this study explodes the myth that they are located in Arkansas and Alabama
source: dentaleconomics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Whirlpool suspends 39 workers who lied about smoking. Who didn't see this coming?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
McDonald's in the UK has a new range of uniforms designed by Bruce Oldfield. Working there still sucks, but you'll look fabulous
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: What if police cars had NASCAR-style sponsors?
source: staytondailyphoto.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The London Paper)
 
 
 
News: Man knocks out politician. Fark: With a well aimed stress ball to the head
source: thelondonpaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Spider plague. Spider plague. Does whatever a spider plague does
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hamilton Spectator)
 
 
 
Church of the Universe uses pot as sacrament. Founders face jail and forfeiture of their building. Defense: "Your Honour, when alcohol was illegal, nobody asked the pope about the sincerity of his religion"
source: thespec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Fifteen Puerto Rican monkeys paddle to freedom in Florida. "I think they're more street-smart than a zoo monkey"
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Don't want to pay for actual police? Buy an empty shell that looks like a police car instead, and place it where the crime is. This will end well
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
And the No. 1 threat this week: Bears. The bear from Semi-Pro kills trainer for making him a part of Semi-Pro
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(thisisplymouth)
 
 
 
How many firefighters does it take to rescue a celebrity iguana?
source: thisisplymouth.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy with a less than zero pressure job
source: hyla.org.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Happy St George's Day to all you English Farkers
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Remember that amazing opera singer from "Britain's Got Talent"? Well, homeboy had an offspring
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
High school senior arrested for having sex with his girlfriend
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Horizontal static test firing of a space shuttle solid rocket booster. If you were trying to make the Earth spin backwards, this is a start
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Georgia Cracker)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Smoking Gun's one mugshot per page. New hotness: DeKalb County's 120 clickable mugshots on one page
source: scandekalb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WPXI.com)
 
 
 
Leading police on a high-speed chase in a Porsche through a construction zone after shooting at a truck and a McDonald's sign? You'd better believe that's a tasering, even if you are the "Sultan of Turkey"
source: wpxi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Holy Taco)
 
 
 
The 11 manliest cocktails in the world
source: holytaco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you're going to pick up a hooker in Memphis, don't do it in your government-issued vehicle. And leave your seven-year-old daughter at home
source: myeyewitnessnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Those lights over Phoenix last night? Some guy who released helium balloons
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 22, 2008
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Hillary sees her shadow in Pennsylvania. We can expect six more weeks of tired, pathetic campaigning
source: elections.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Ontario moves to outlaw homeowner's association bans on using clotheslines. Now, if they'd just ban homeowner's associations
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Out of all the cities in America, students from Alaska decide to go to Cleveland for their senior trip
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WRTV.com)
 
 
 
If your charges include arson, operating a vehicle without ever receiving a license and criminal mischief, you're not doing so good. FARK: you're 10
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Worst. Coloring Book. Evar
source: holyheroes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Yars)
 
 
 
Other "lost" Atari 2600 games discovered, including "Magna Carta", "Aliens Vs. Ghosts" and "Every Sport Ever In Pong Form". Seriously. The last is not a joke
source: mightygodking.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Farkette)
 
 
 
Fark does not make the top 10 list of Websites for Women, but is mentioned as unwelcoming - if not positively hostile - towards women
source: dollymix.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this inflatable chicken
source: healthypetboutique.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
FCC chief: "Leave the Internet alone." No word on whether he wants Britney left alone
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAM)
 
 
 
Man goofs while making homemade fireworks. Now in the market for a house that isn't blowed up
source: wtam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
There are many ways to avoid jury selection. Showing up stinking drunk is not ideal, but it does the trick
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Woman finds 8-foot gator in her kitchen. With smiling gator in 70's decor kitchen pic
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Lynchings in Congo as penis theft panic grips capital firmly in two hands
source: africa.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
What's wrong with Kansas? Nothing a silenced machine gun can't fix
source: www2.ljworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
UN estimates Darfur conflict death toll at 300,000 now. Good thing they don't have oil
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Breitbart.tv)
 
 
 
Pizza Hut delivery driver fired for shooting robber with registered gun
source: breitbart.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DARPA)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass falcon chicks hatch atop city hall in Silicon Valley
source: nbc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR)
 
 
 
News: Some country singer you've never heard of going to court for allegedly assaulting fan's boyfriend. FARK: Actual name of singer's album is "My Life's Been a Country Song"
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
You just rented a home. Do you: A live quietly in the neigorhood B invite a few friends over for a BBQ C Turn it into a swinger's club complete with a stripper's pole and see thru bedroom windows
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Viking)
 
 
 
Viking metal band Helheim on performing in front of a Norwegian kindergarten class: "We need to let metal and Odin catch the kids before Jesus does" (w/ links to pics and video of performance)
source: roadrunnerrecords.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Macy's confiscates woman's pot, gives it to another customer
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Three months after ending their season at 18-1, the New England Patriots are still pursuing trademarks on "19-0"
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Looks like Richard Quest had a history of being good with rope tricks
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Photoshop this silly looking man
source: youhavechanged.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Newspaper in Pennsylvania's state capital runs front-page story with photos of Clinton, Obama, puts sticker over Clinton's face. Bonus: Claims it was "an accident", not a sign of bias
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(lake placid news)
 
 
 
What do you call the longest side of a right triangle formed by three crashed vehicles? A hypotamoose
source: lakeplacidnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MyFOX Phoenix)
 
 
 
Were UFOs spotted over Phoenix?
source: myfoxphoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Scientist have finally decoded the brain fart
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
"Fifteen percent of those surveyed said they have supported a cause because of what they heard an actor, singer or other celebrity say or do."
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Don't worry, we'll have that wisdom tooth out before you can say: "don't turn out the lights, don't lock me in the office, don't head home for the night..."
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Al Qaida #2 calls for more attacks on the countries currently occupying Iraq. Also takes questions from followers such as "Aren't you dead?" and "No really, haven't you been killed liked 35 times?"
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Pittsburgh Fark Party. Friday May 2nd. Church Brew Works. LGT previous thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Mother discovers her daughter's a hooker thanks to Diane Sawyer and ABC's inability to hide her identity
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Say hello to loons and ticks: "Hello to loons and ticks."
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Jury finds that UFIA is acceptable when examing a construction worker hit on the head by a falling wooden beam
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Union)
 
 
 
Bad: One-year-old child manages to jump out of a second story window. Good: A mail carrier arriving three hours ahead of schedule, catches it. Fark: There was a mail carrier that was three hours ahead of schedule?
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Man sues San Jose over illegal photo radar tickets. City's defense: we didn't mean to break the law so we shouldn't have to give your money back
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
MSNBC: that chick showing her bra was NOT 15 year old Miley Cyrus. Offers no evidence however
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some ExPat)
 
 
 
Those sunburned Brits you see eating fish & chips and drinking warm beer on Spanish beaches? They aren't tourists - they're Time Travelers
source: thegloveontherailing.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Sixth-grade teacher refuses to be another brick in the wall, chooses not to give his students highly controversial state-mandated test. "I decided, 'I'm not going to wimp out this time.' "
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Shaolin Kung-Fu master files lawsuit claiming discrimination when co-workers made fun of his web site. A real Shaolin Kung-Fu master would have already killed the defendants with his mind
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Helsingin Sanomat)