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Sun February 03, 2008
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
City evicts sex offenders living under bridge because they couldn't find housing that wasn't 2500 feet away from schools. Maybe they should move to state parks instead?
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(227)
 
(Yahoo)
 
NewsFlash
 
Somewhere in South America, a village is getting a shipment of "19-0" T-shirts. Giants upset Patriots 17-14 to win Super Bowl
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1639)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you still have your learner's permit, it probably isn't a good idea to do burnouts in the parking lot in front of a police station
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
TUBE = "Totally Unnecessary Breast Exam"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Job you're glad is not yours: answering the phones right now at Fox 24 in Arkansas, who farked up and lost their Super Bowl feed
source: 4029tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Joran van der Sloot says he was with Natalee Holloway when she died and disposed of her body
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(200)
 
(NFL.com)
 
 
 
Super Bowl thread, part deux
source: nfl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2305)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
One in five people on welfare fails to show up for mandatory review of why they're not working, offering excuses from "I'm drunk" to "Work is irrelevant to my life"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Delmaine Fine Foods is jerkin' the Gherkin
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Pub owner cuts opening hours after discovering that serving drinkers too much alcohol leads to drunken behaviour - blames government for not teaching people booze can be bad for you
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
British announce a 61% increase in liposuction and a 27% increase in breast work. Not among women, either
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(WBALTV)
 
 
 
Maryland lawmakers are trying to cut taxes on college textbooks. Wow, is it just a coincidence that this happens two days after they try to raise the beer taxes six-fold?
source: wbaltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Snowboarders plopped across the middle of runs chatting on cellphones, gondola cars reeking of smoke, and Red Bull cans littering the snow under lifts are all examples of poor shrediquette
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(ABC 2)
 
 
 
Can I have my steak medium well with a side order of carbon monoxide poisoning?
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
There are things you can do for yourself and avoid having to call in a pro: fixing a leaky faucet, installing carpet, tiling the bathroom. An exorcism is not one of those things
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Some Puppies)
 
 
 
Puppy Bowl IV discussion thread
source: itsallabout.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(231)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Patriots. Giants. 'Nuff said
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1769)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fourth undersea cable cut in Mideast; Authorities readying "damage from ship anchor" excuse
source: malaysia.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(273)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
British man dies piste off after trying to ski down mountain on a mattress
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Murfreesboro Post)
 
 
 
50-year old woman surprised after man named "G" fails to return her car after borrowing it
source: murfreesboropost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Hillary promises that unlike her rivals, HER health plan will be universal. Even if she has to automatically enroll the reluctant and garnish their wages to pay for it
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(633)
 
(pennlive.com)
 
 
 
News: Teen faces weapons of mass destruction charges. Fark: after exploding plastic egg at flea market
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Irish setter has record-breaking litter of 16 puppies. With the ugliest-ass pictures of 16 ten-day-old puppies you've ever seen
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Apparently a seven-week suspension violates state education law. Principal says student can come back, but only if she says she's sorry
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Insects
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Scientists find wearing stiletto heels is good for a woman's sex life. Obvious tag surrenders
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Flashing high beams to alert drivers of speed traps "promotes karma" and is NOT illegal in Canada or U.S
source: canadianpress.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(367)
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
New Hampshire officials wonder why accidents are five times higher after they dropped a roundabout in the middle of a four lane highway
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Just in case you missed the first 500,000 articles about tropical rainforests falling at an "alarming" rate, here's the latest one. EVERYBODY TROPANIC
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Will it be 19 and 0? Have we finally found a game that Eli cares about playing in? Will Matt Light get stuck in between Michael Strahan's front teeth? Super Bowl pre-game discussion/smack talk thread
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(652)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
FDA blames Pfizer's anti-smoking drug for causing suicidal thoughts among aspiring quitters. Obviously nobody at the FDA has ever tried to quit smoking
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Tazer parties becoming more popular. What's shocking is that they're not just for Houston cops anymore
source: today.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
To ensure that their special day goes off without a hitch, some brides require bridesmaids to sign a contract stating that they won't get fat or pregnant before the wedding
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Crime Stoppers to take text message tips. Your BFF Jill better watch her step
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Hampton Roads)
 
 
 
Police seize murals from Abercrombie & Fitch store, including "one of a woman topless and whose breast is displayed with her hand covering just the nipple. You could still pretty much see the rest of the breast."
source: hamptonroads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(379)
 
(ufospider)
 
 
 
Is the USAF testing its own Flying Saucer? Here comes the photographic "evidence"
source: ufospider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Australian state to start online court hearings. "ZOMG WTF R U THINKNG?" "STFU OBJECTIONX0RSZ." "LOLVERRULED, n00b, ROFL"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man takes steamroller for joyride through new housing estate. K-K-K-Ken un-un-un-unavailable f-f-f-f-f-f-f-for c-c-c-c-c-CAH-c-c-c-CAH-CAAAAAAAH report
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Discover)
 
 
 
Scientists discover famous "six degrees of separation" theory between people is wrong. You can quit sending Christmas cards to Kevin Bacon now
source: discovermagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this "O"
source: i113.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
The gain in Maine falls mainly on... someone whose name doesn't fit into this rhyme scheme: Mitt Romney
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Taxi and Limousine Commission inspectors and police officers launch "Operation: Secret Rider" to catch NYC cab drivers breaking the rules. Reverend Jim Ignatowski still doesn't know what a yellow light means
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
If you went swimming at a Marin County or San Francisco beach on Friday, you might want to make sure your hepatitis booster is up to date
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Manitoba Merv the groundhog predicts six more weeks of winter for Winnipeg
source: winnipegsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
State Senator wants bong buyers to take a tax hit
source: media.www.diamondbackonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Man driving through accident scene busted when cops spot guns and drugs in his car. Suspect: "I'm probably gonna wind up on one of those 'dumb crook' shows"
source: komotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
At least four injured by a hand grenade at a Sri Lanka zoo. They taunted the grenadier lemur
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
This year's deadpool is supersized; "Fatburger" founder Lovie Yancey is the latest restaurateur to go
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Farmer's markets? Too easy. Elderly Brits play "there can be only one" with mobility scooters
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
It's cold outside, and you need to get your nicotine fix. Fortunately for you, Phillip Morris has made a shorter cigarette with the same amount of nicotine and cancer
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
If you know who else lost a fleet of three German U-boats in the Black Sea during World War II, tell him they've been found
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
50 years ago this week, the US Air Force lost a bomb off the Atlantic coast. A nuclear bomb. Which poses no danger ... unless you drop anchor in the wrong place
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Many men I know have no children and play video games. They still wear teenagers' clothes, they obsess about pop music and films and value themselves and their leisure activities over responsibility"
source: independent.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(568)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
If you're on Staten Island having a heart attack and need to get to the hospital, keep a $5 bill in your purse/pocket (w/video)
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Polls show European high school students suck at 20th century history as much as American students do. Mao Zewho?
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Mall pianist chases down teen who stole tip jar, adds Jane's Addiction, AMG & Ben Folds Five to repertoire
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
What is your greatest irrational fear? LGT something vaguely related
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(747)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop what could possibly go wrong
source: jasma.lv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 


Sat February 02, 2008
(AP)
 
 
 
Woman missing since Sept. 10, 2001, declared a "victim" of 9/11. Simply because, as a doctor, she "might have been" there
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Flu season running hot in 11 states with new strain not covered by this year's vaccine
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(DW-World)
 
 
 
Atheists make children's book teaching acceptance of all beliefs and sharing. Nah, just kidding, it is portrays all religions as evil and bloodthirsty complete with a crazed Jew
source: dw-world.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(943)
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
For those who thought "Boy this is good sake, but I wished it had more of a squiddy taste" you're now in luck
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(pennlive.com)
 
 
 
"The second boy sat down on the pencil, lodging a piece of it in his rear"
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(I want to thank fark)
 
 
 
Beauty queen drives across three lanes of traffic to block the path of another car. That's when things start to get weird (with crying picture of the psycho winning a pageant)
source: fayobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Chattanooga Times Free Press)
 
 
 
Sheriff arrested prior to scheduled jail tour to show students what happens to adults who commit crimes
source: timesfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Maybe NYC can't beat Boston in sports, but they sure can beat them on the streets: John Kerry's sister mugged in Manhattan
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Deal to end writers' strike may be near. Fans of Carebears: The CGI Adventure and The Godfather 4: A Lifetime TV mini-series rejoice
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(208)
 
(The Union (Nevada))
 
 
 
Monday, 11:51 a.m.: when dancing like a robot in the parking lot is outlawed, only outlaws will go BEEP BEEP BOOP BEEP
source: theunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Tulsa World)
 
 
 
Leave your kids at home. Damn, pimpin' ain't easy
source: ktul.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Hostile NYC Cab Drivers offer a side of "flesh and bone" to all credit card customers (Ouch)
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Small town mayor resigns amid felony charges after telling the owners of a dog she was watching that it died; dog was spotted three months later at the groomers, was living with mayor's sister under a new name
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Romero's been scooped once again: Economic downturn linked to increase in arson
source: articles.moneycentral.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
I can has waves?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop challenge: Colorize this snowy barn
source: gallery.count0.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
France's Sarkozy surrenders, marries Bruni
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rent-to-own furniture company purposely hiring convicted felons as collectors, stalking client's children, and even knifing a customer. And that's the nice stuff
source: sanantoniolightning.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Five shot in Lane Bryant store outside Chicago; four dead, shooter at large
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(463)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Antitrust laws may help Microsoft acquire Yahoo. In other news, water is dry, carrots are soft, and bananas are crunchy
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Infidelity expert" claims 85% of Americans are victims of emotional, cyber, same-sex, tentacle, or female infidelity. Other 15% getting serious action
source: americanchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(182)
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
Yes, Virginia, you CAN fit a black angus cow into the back seat of a Dodge Intrepid (with post-accident video goodness)
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
One fine day, in the middle of the night, two dead policemen began to fight. Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Sierra Vista Herald)
 
 
 
Bad headline writer inadvertently posts Help Wanted ad for Farkers
source: svherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Natural hallucinogenic sage may be banned finally giving it a chance to compete with marijuana
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(306)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
"How one man's life was ruined by marriage." One? They only found ONE?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Hotties, doofuses, grills, shirts with slogans, something odd on the ceiling - you'll find all this and more in this week's roundup of mugshots from The Smoking Gun
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(Some gang member)
 
 
 
It cost the city of LA $25,000 to escort Britney to her last hospital visit. It is not like LA needs these cops in the first place anyway since there is no crime, drunk drivers or gang members in paradise
source: dailybreeze.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(162)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Apparently even the Dutch can't get enough porn - website featuring safe sex instructional videos overloaded on first day. Bonus: it's a government website
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Some 38 year old guy)
 
 
 
Since this 38 year old woman has never visited Fark, she thought 16 year old meat would be fun and safe to play with. Shocking: She's not a teacher
source: dailybreeze.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these tree diggers
source: windowonwoodbridge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man who was photographed riding his motorcycle on the freeway while wearing his barbecue grill says he now sees the error of his ways
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(LBC 97.3)
 
 
 
Poll shows that "Miami Vice" is the first thing most Americans think of when they hear the name "Miami." Don Johnson would like to thank you for validating his existence
source: tampabays10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Accordion to the article, Daddy's got 800 squeezeboxes. Mama never sleeps at night
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Costco to sell its own brand of beer. They love you
source: the.honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not News: Today is Groundhog Day. News: Today is Groundhog Day. Fark: Today is Groundhog Day
source: groundhog.visitpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Man puts brand new car in wrong gear, tumbles it down 100-foot cliff, escapes uninjured. Ta-da
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Le maker de 'franglais' est le dead
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Ceiling cat is watching you operate
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(557)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Interrupt me while I'm tagging this building? That's a stabbin'. Now just bleed quietly while I finish, dammit
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Fairbanks Daily News-Miner)
 
 
 
98 luftballons
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Not news: Misled youths steal. News: Misled youths steal from the Girl Scouts. Fark: HOT misled youths steal from Girl Scouts (w/ pic...)
source: wpbf.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(393)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Your wife can now cite "Stressorexia" as another excuse to avoid sex on a Friday night
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Some of the most boneheaded emergency calls in Britain, including, "I've found a kitten in my house," and "Come and arrest my boyfriend - he's put my hamster out in the rain"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Welsh post-graduate student dies in apartment blaze in China. If only he'd taken part in the fire drills
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
When you're using hydrochloric acid and methylated spirits to scrub rocks in the backyard it's probably not a good idea to light up a smoke
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Two junior high students cited for "hurling missiles." The missiles in question? French fries
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Presidential Candidate Breakfast Cereal
source: a.abcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you're a cop, it's not a wise career move to zip past photo radar at 73 mph as you respond to an emergency call giving two thumbs up with both hands off the wheel (w/pic)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Two Amtrak trains stranded near Donner Pass. There are 400 passengers, so they are not expected to run out of food
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(iAfrica)
 
 
 
MP apologizes for suggesting prostitution be legalized during the 2010 Soccer World Cup, claims he just wanted to promote more scoring
source: iafrica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(The hung list)
 
 
 
Men named Dave presumed to be the most well-endowed, according to a poll of British women. Sorry Ray, looks like you're most likely to be out driving around in your new Porsche Carrera 4 convertible
source: medindia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Department of Children & Families spokesman arrested for hiring teenagers to make child pornography. Ironic tag will sit this one out in favor of obvious
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Virus that causes cervical cancer in women can cause oral cancer in men. But, how the heck could that be transmitted?
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Fairbanks Daily News-Miner)
 
 
 
Family dog saves pregnant woman from mad moose. Much was at steak
source: newsminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Post meant to rise out of the ground to block traffic does so at random, taking unwary pedestrians who happen to be walking over it at the time with it (pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 


Fri February 01, 2008
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Actual Headline: "Police: Crack Found in Man's Buttocks"
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
"If you look up right now you can see the tallest building in the *BZZZZZZZZZTTTTTZAP"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(News Net 5)
 
 
 
Cue ball, apply directly to the forehead. Cue ball, apply directly to the forehead
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Some rich guy)
 
 
 
"If you happen to find a rare, decorative, gold colored, jewel encrusted Fabergé Egg, Grosse Pointe Shores Police would like to hear from you"
source: wwj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canada: Where old British people go to die
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
Man attempting to hang self discovered by girlfriend, who cuts him down. Man starts fighting with her, fight is noticed by passerby, who stops fight by putting man in sleeper-hold, which kills him. Taa-daa
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Men's desire to have an equal parenting role does not extend to child-related domestic chores such as washing clothes or packing lunchboxes"
source: lifeandhealth.guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Desert News)
 
 
 
It's all funny to skip school with two of your friends until the the three of you get kidnapped and held hostage
source: deseretnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Young woman hatched bizarre plot to get even with ex-boyfriend, convincing four guys to kidnap him, drive him to another town, make him clean her apartment, and phone his new girlfriend to break up with her. Whiskey. Tango. Fark
source: thewhig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Man with a 30-inch inseam falls off a roof and onto a 36-inch fence post
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
It's all funny to join a record club under the name "Shiat Face" until the "Dear Shiat" collection letters start arriving
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Guy decides to display his knowledge of explosives at an airport. What could possibly go wrong?
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Woo hoo... bacon candy recipe goodness (bacon, bacon, bacon)
source: recipe.aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Pope criticizes science for not protecting human dignity. This from a guy who wears an origami hat
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(231)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Flight 209 now arriving, gate
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(164)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Wesley Snipes aquitted of the most serious charges against him, still faces three years in prison on lesser charge, which surprisingly is unrelated to his performance in "Demolition Man"
source: us.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
Perhaps the town dump is not the best place for your sausage stand
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Albuquerque Journal)
 
 
 
New Mexico group pushes for tax on video gaming equipment, televisions to discourage lazy children. Next step is to just make being lazy illegal, but they needed taxes to fund the enforcement program first
source: abqjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(NASA)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flying cowboy
source: nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Irish Republic takes pleasure in rolling back stiff tax on condoms after being ribbed by pressure groups. Penis
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(WTAE-TV)
 
 
 
School bus driver hailed as a hero after deliberately driving his bus full of kids into a tree
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Art students take afternoon off from daytime TV and design some pretty useful looking mobile phones for the future
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
News: Man attacks hiking couple with bat. Newsier: Man loses control of bat to woman hiker. Fark: She starts beating attacker with said bat
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Some impressed 200+ pound Guy)
 
 
 
Personal responsibility seen working out, getting ready for a comeback as man loses 600lbs through -- you'll never believe this -- "diet and exercise"
source: ketv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
MILFy medical student visits zoo, sees baby tiger choking, assists zookeeper in clearing its windpipe, performs CPR and mouth-to-mouth, saving tiger's life. With pics of said MILF and ugly-ass baby tigers
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
MIT student argues that it is her First Amendment right to be an asshat
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(271)
 
(TPM Election Central)
 
 
 
Humorist Al Franken leads in Minnesota Senate race; would be first Senator ever to be intentionally funny
source: tpmelectioncentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(273)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you have been riding your motorcycle while wearing a barbecue grill, the Aussie police would a word with you. (w/pic)
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Discovery)
 
 
 
New languages happen in a sudden burst of new words coined as groups of people strive to describe the world around them, says the ORLY Insitute
source: dsc.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Colorado lawmaker submits, "Wouldn't this be real nice inside of you?" as best pickup line with requisite pulling out of junk
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Atheist group on MySpace gets deleted for the third time. Where is your god now?
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(555)
 
(Albany Times Union)
 
 
 
Woman forced to grab a shovel and fill in her brother's grave after town forgot to bury the casket
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Writing about your eating disorders on MySpace or Facebook doesn't endear you to insurance companies
source: law.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Proposed Mississippi legislation prohibits restaurants from serving the obese
source: pollsb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(274)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Behind the scenes of a rocket factory in Gaza, where Palestinian men build delivery systems carrying payloads of chocolate and fuzzy puppies to Israel (with pics)
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(363)
 
(Ledger-Enquirer)
 
 
 
Sometimes relationships end, but I don't think setting your girlfriend on fire will score you points with the next girl that comes along
source: ledger-enquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Southern Methodist University is considering putting in a bar on campus to combat drunken driving, ugly coeds
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Today's "Don't post a marijuana ad on Craigslist" lesson brought to you by Stamford, Connecticut
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Secular progressives score a victory as man is arrested for praying -- in church
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Law.com)
 
 
 
Judge reprimanded for telling a defendant with three female attorneys that he should get a good male lawyer. In his defense, he also made fun of them for being black
source: law.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
114 years ago today, the first movie studio opened. 114 years ago tomorrow, it ran out of ideas
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Man about to put a million miles on his truck with the original engine. It's not a Ford, which should come as a surprise to no one
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Valleywag)
 
 
 
What are we likely to see as the result of the Microsoft-Yahoo takeover?
source: valleywag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Old Guy's Lawn)
 
 
 
80-year old former Green Beret gets mock courtmartial for shooting burglar with "inadequate caliber weapon"
source: bluestarchronicles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(268)
 
(WISHTV)
 
 
 
Attempted copper theft at power substation leave thousands without power. Police on the lookout for men with new hairstyles, speech impediments
source: wishtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
America's disaster plans "couldn't move a Girl Scout unit"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Chocolate Balls)
 
 
 
"We appreciate that marketing chocolates is a matter of great commercial sensitivity and hope that we have not inadvertently hit a delicate spot by drawing attention to the fact that these sweets looked and felt like testes"
source: bmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Teen who stole boat and sparked massive air-sea search to spend next year walking 5,000 miles around Britain apologizing to everyone he meets
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Knock, knock... who's ther*BLAM*
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(1010WINS)
 
 
 
The wheels on the dump truck bump the school bus. Bump, bump, bump. Bump. bump, bump. The wheels on the dump truck bump the school bus, early this morning
source: 1010wins.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Blind Texas woman makes second stab at state acupuncture license
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
The latest poll numbers are in and Obama is now leading in Germany by double digits and running even with Hillary in Japan, Russia is solid Romney territory, while Iraq is trending for McCain
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(260)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
It is high time the children sat down and explained the dangers of unprotected sex to their unsuspecting parents
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Kids sending bomb threats. New hotness: Teachers pretending to be students sending bomb threats. In an elementary school
source: phillyburbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Reclusive author murdered by identity thief. Suspicions were first raised when his latest novel began, "Hello, I am Prince Nakawazole of Nigeria, and this is my story"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Rabbis increasingly making office calls for executives too busy controlling the media and the world banking system to attend temple
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(217)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Coolest 10-foot-tall portraits drawn with a single ballpoint pen you'll see in the next 18 minutes (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(Tufts Daily)
 
 
 
What does the Department of Homeland Security do to a person that calls Osama Bin Laden a "freedom fighter"? How about a $1.6 million dollar grant?
source: media.www.tuftsdaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Earliest surviving map of Britain confirms all of our long-held beliefs about Scotland
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Lesbian high school student complains to principal that students are harassing her; he responds that she should not be gay. Oooh, wrong answer
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(352)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A Fark tradition: Photoshop the new Miss America
source: missamerica.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(PJ Star)
 
 
 
"There's nothing like 7,200 volts of electricity frying a squirrel to capture the attention of high school students"
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
While she says she only wears lingerie for you, "women use lingerie to impress each other as much as their boyfriends"
source: cphpost.dk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(604)
 
(Sur)
 
 
 
12-year-old Spanish girl foils kidnapping attempt by kicking her attacker in the maracas
source: surinenglish.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Reno Gazette-Journal)
 
 
 
Searching for qualified candidates to drive Steve Fossett's 800 mph land speed record car, organizers announce they are now actively seeking female applicants
source: news.rgj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(WJZ.com)
 
 
 
Early contender for "Cop of the Year" comes from Baltimore: lawsuit alleges he ripped up a victim's paper money and shoved it up victim's ass
source: wjz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(215)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
If you're riding the bus and miss your stop, your options don't actually include C) beat up the driver and cause the bus to crash
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
The Onion apologizes to local firefighter after firefighter's mother saw his picture in their paper and believed that he really had lost his lifelong battle with fire
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Surprisingly, Myanmar's ruling junta has a big problem with pirated DVDs of the new "Rambo" movie, which features Rambo kicking the snot out of Myanmar's ruling junta
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Boy with a six-inch hole in his skull came out of a coma when his dad promised him some KFC. Om nom nom nom
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Microsoft offers to buy Yahoo for $44.6 billion, unlimited Yahoo Mail invites
source: channel4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(250)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"In their craven pursuit of clicks, editors at CNN.com, MSNBC, and Fox turn their sites into virtual tabloids by peppering their home pages with the most sordid and bizarre stories that can be culled from the world's news wires"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ice Quake rocks University of Wisconsin-Madison campus. T, Cube unavailable for comment
source: channel3000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Stare at my junk while I'm standing at the urinal? That's a face-punchin'. No, wait, it's two
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(KCRA 3 Sacramento)
 
 
 
"Stranger Originated Life Insurance" means someone you don't know will profit from your death. This couldn't possibly be a bad idea
source: kcra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Scientists find sugary drinks responsible for surge in reported cases of gout, dropsy, cheeky Cockney boy chimneysweeps
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
British education report says history lessons should stick to bare facts rather than encouraging loyalty to Britain when covering subjects such as WW2 or the British Empire
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(258)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this edifice of spiritual significance for practitioners of Integral Yoga
source: upload.wikimedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Lancashire Evening Post)
 
 
 
NASA to beam the Beatles' "Across the Universe" 431 light years into space
source: lep.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Looks like Margot Kidder is on the loose again
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Student is tagged as being a "computer hacker" and "potential threat" to the school system by school admistration. Crime: His personal proxy server was leaked and used by other students
source: robertafnani.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 


Thu January 31, 2008
(London Times)
 
 
 
Fifteen women in their 80s and 90s to be honored for their wartime service: flying Spitfires
source: women.timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(ABC 2)
 
 
 
Maryland goes smoke free at midnight, Baltimore still has to deal with second hand gunsmoke though
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(265)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
Company makes debit card that lets you withdraw from your 401k plan at ATMs. This cannot possibly end poorly
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(241)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Senior citizen centers and retirement homes are using Nintendo Wii consoles to allow their elderly residents the chance to virtually experience the thrill of golfing, bowling and plowing through farmer's markets all over again
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(KCRG TV-9)
 
 
 
Article about fake NASA 'rocket' but this time with a more understandable pic of a phone. Try and keep up here, people
source: kcrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Try to guess what element of a news photograph showing a bikini-clad woman smoking a water pipe in a Beirut conflict zone is upsetting people
source: theaustralian.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Discovery)
 
 
 
The origin of the common housecat has been traced to the Middle East. i can haz cheezburqa?
source: dsc.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Fourth grade students in Utah are going out on limb trying to get the state tree changed from a "Colorado Spruce" to a "Utah Juniper"
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Looking straight down at NASA's Space Shuttle Atlantis -- from 525 feet (160 meters) above the ground
source: chamorrobible.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Hydrogen peroxide enemas put Russian tourists in the hospital. In related news, there are now a bunch of blonde a-holes running around in Russia
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
New Zealand scientists turn off crying gene in onions, disappointed with lack of progress on shyness gene in sheep
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(WTAM)
 
 
 
"Our landlord was a real nice guy until he started shooting at us through the floor"
source: wtam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Having solved all other medical problems, science tackles the most important issue of all: why we scratch
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Sea captains' logbooks from the 1800's reveal secrets of New England's fishing culture
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Judge tells magazine that defendant of case he is hearing is pleading insanity because everyone knows he did it. Recusal-larity ensues
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
People shocked by the fact that gas price is rising, even though it has been for years now
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops, oops
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Chinese Government warns airlines that if a plane is late, or if the airline overbooks a flight during the upcoming Olympic Games, "they will be punished." Ricky Tan and the Triads nod, wink and smile
source: newpaper.asia1.com.sg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Expert tips to pour the perfect beer - Step 1: Find the perfect beer. Step 2: Pour it
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
ACLU sues school to protect students' rights to have rainbow stickers on their notebooks. Fabulous
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Boston Channel)
 
 
 
Man read his rights and booked after leafing through a child at the public library
source: thebostonchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Not news: Another teacher has sex with a student News: After student teacher sex teacher drops student off in front of house Fark: Mother chases teacher in car until he crashes (tag is for Mom)
source: extra.examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
A rare 1918 brass knuckle knife that paratroopers wore strapped to their legs has been stolen from a musuem. Expect it to show up in a Fark article in the next few days
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(Zenhabits.net)
 
 
 
Bored at work? Here's 30 things to do to pass the time. Sadly, Fark not even an honorable mention
source: zenhabits.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(TSP)
 
 
 
The only thing worse than coming home to find a deer in the house is when it sees its own reflection in the mirror, gets spooked, and trashes the house
source: thestarpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission found to be slow to inform consumers of dangerous products. You submitted this with a better headline but the 'Submit Link' button blew up and blinded you
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Is it the end of the month already? Must be, because there "new evidence" again in the Natalie Holloway case. Which will of course lead no where and won't solve anything
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Court evicts woman for plaguing neighbors with Dolly Parton songs at hours other than 9 to 5
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
City erects fence to stop homeless people from sleeping in an underpass. Panhandlers' union responds by launching a lawsuit. Yes, you read that right: panhandlers' union
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(174)
 
(PhotoSig)
 
 
 
Photoshop this crane bucket scooper-upper thingamajig
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Chicoer)
 
 
 
Drug Enforcement agents seize 160 pounds of hallucinogenic mushrooms. Plan to make a pretty nice-sized salad
source: chicoer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Newsnet5)
 
 
 
Catholics urged not to celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Seriously, stop laughing
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Times Herald Record)
 
 
 
Today's repeat-offender bigamy story is brought to you by Port Jervis, New York, complete with mugshot that'll have you wondering how she even latched one man, let alone four
source: recordonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Daily Camera)
 
 
 
Drifter pleads guilty to Georgia coed hiker's murder, gets life without parole
source: dailycamera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Air your security gripes on the TSA blog. Subby has 72 hours in the "how long will this last before someone freaks out and shuts it down" pool
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
US finally safe from Canada
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Mother buys eight-year old daughter a "Happy Bunny" book, complains when she realizes it's not for children
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Federal report shows more animals are being struck on the nation's highways, with accompanying photo of a car veering off the road and heading straight at a freaked-out bear
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(WLBT)
 
 
 
Adult store found to be selling sex toys (with hilarious transcript)
source: wlbt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(287)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Another day, another al Qaeda #2 killed
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 
(Gimundo)
 
 
 
Only in Japan: Get dumped, score paid leave from work
source: gimundo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(WISN)
 
 
 
Two arrested in Miller beer exec slaying, were apparently unable to resolve classic Great Taste/Less Filling quandry peacefully
source: wisn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bad news: U.S. military unprepared for catastrophic attack on homeland. Good news: invading paratroopers can be repelled by scrappy bands of high school students with hunting rifles
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(286)
 
(Something Awful)
 
 
 
Cheeseburger in a can: a user's experience
source: forums.somethingawful.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you're lost and cold after stealing computers from a school, just flag down the school adminstrator to get directions
source: nbc5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(9)
 
(kenosha news)
 
 
 
Woman receives $2,000 bill from Time Warner for "the loss of five cable boxes, five remotes and a modem". She admits that the items are lost since they were in the house when the tornado blew it away
source: kenoshanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
US Navy ready to test fire rail gun; Chinese and Russians watching closely to see whether the design is worth stealing
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(160)
 
(Cha Yathink)
 
 
 
Secret technology may account for Texas UFO sightings
source: reporternews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
On pace to be a great-grandmother by 33. Beat THAT, Alabama
source: news.enquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(277)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Prince Charles complains that English cities are as ugly as the horse he rode in on
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Yale frat-boys are shocked, SHOCKED that women's groups are offended by their "We Love Yale Sluts" signs
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(167)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Two pounds of pasta, two heads of lettuce, and three gallons of water. For breakfast. In 20 minutes
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Four people must go directly to jail for killing a teen over a game of Monopoly. Spare me the water works if you think there's a chance they got railroaded. I hope they get put in the chair and the electric company does the rest
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Edmunds)
 
 
 
18-year old kid who bragged to online BMW community about driving his 2008 M5 really fast is now bragging to St. Peter
source: edmunds.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(568)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Dumbass Fark: Man takes taxi from Newcastle to Scotland, then runs off without paying. Spiffy Fark: Villagers take collection and donate £215 to pay the cab driver because they were "ashamed of the way he had been cheated"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Anton LaVey's Black House is now condos, which means it reached a new level of hell Anton never imagined
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The People's Republic of Boulder dukes it out with the Christian Nation of Colorado Springs for the Presidency of the USA
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Neighbor calls 911 in a panic after mistaking a portable heater on the roof of a school for a NASA rocket
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Police find 14-year old runaway girl safe and sound. In the bed of a sex offender while wearing a dog collar around her neck
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(342)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
In a subtle reworking of an old biblical parable, very special man miraculously turns a loaf of bread into thousands of ecstasy tablets
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
If you are a novice skier, grooming yourself while skiing is generally a bad idea
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Pro Tip: If you transport $500,000 of pot in you car at night, you should have your headlights turned on
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Daily Herald)
 
 
 
Mock disaster drill reveals bloggers are threat to U.S.; Perez Hilton to be upgraded from "annoying" to "dangerous"
source: dailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Custodian busted for having sex with junior high student, inadvertently earns high school teaching credential
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Thief thwarted by a salami
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Man wins an 11-year bet to see who could wear the UPS shorts the longest. In Alberta. Where in was -48C a couple of days ago
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(AutoExpress (UK))
 
 
 
NYC Police: Serve? Check. Protect? Check. Sell drugs? Uh oh
source: wnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Apparently all you can eat donut perks not enough for NYPD detective, adds lucrative side business of pimping 13-year old runaway to make ends meet
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Man attacks cabbie with axe. Cabbie flummoxed, "He claimed it was a bottle opener"
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Don't try to steal these women's purses or you might end up with a snow shovel gash so big, it takes staples to close it
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
I'll trade you nine Kuciniches for an Obama. New Topps baseball set includes presidential candidate cards
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Pirates vs Lawyers 2: The Curse of the Copyright
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Fark submitters agree: Animal hoarding a growing problem
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(The Citizen)
 
 
 
Swede jailed for falsely informing the FBI that his former son-in-law had links to al-Qaeda. Said he didn't think US authorities would be "so stupid" as to believe him. Stupid tag goes to him
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
A 1973 list of secret safe-words of the Emergency Broadcast System. You just knew the nukes were coming if the announcer said "bladder"
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Spiegel)
 
 
 
Mexico upset with Germany because of UFIA
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Britain braces for temperatures to plunge as low as eight stones on the guv'nor's hogshead, or however the hell they measure weather over there
source: capitalradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(shieldsgazette)
 
 
 
Sci-fi TV nut builds bad guys from his favourite shows, and they live in his garage. He has monsters, demons, robots, Imperial stormtroopers from Star Wars, and loads more. Bet that keep the burglars out
source: shieldsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
A crucial part of one of Indonesia's tsunami detection systems might have been deliberately removed
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(ICNetwork)
 
 
 
Wife charged for prescribing Viagra to husband. No word yet if it will hold up in court
source: icliverpool.icnetwork.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
1-31-07 Never Forget
source: news.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(389)
 
(WTMJ)
 
 
 
Honey, forget the salad spoons. The baby's in my pants
source: 620wtmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(shieldsgazette)
 
 
 
Jogger calls police after savage drive-by Mars Bar attack
source: shieldsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
London Tube passengers left open-mouthed when a group of commuters - including a suited man - got up from their seats and performed the dance from Thriller
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
San Antonio Post-Express runs piece on the secrets to a happy marriage featuring a couple who never argue...not any more, anyway
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
The long-standing male chauvinistic stranglehold over Groundhog Day is in jeopardy, thanks to Ms. G and a petition that's picking up steam
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"You're Doing It Wrong" Photoshop challenge: Mistakenly use a common grocery item based on its brand name and get surprising results. Difficulty: No pharmaceuticals. Link goes to lame Q&D example
source: boonedocks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Vegetarians are perverts of nature who slowly kill themselves, scientists say(NSFW pic)
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(537)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Blaze burns more than 300 portable toilets. Arson investigators say the fire was suspicious, but they have nothing to go on
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(The Indy Channel.com)
 
 
 
With all the crack dealers, burglars and other miscreants behind bars, the Muncie, IN police turn their attention to the new threat: people painting their own cross walks
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Two police officers lock themselves in a room and call for backup when confronted by a mouthy 13-year old. That's some fine police work there boys
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
British police say Madeleine McCann's parents "are not suspects" in their daughter's disappearance, cunningly trying to lull them into a false sense of security
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Canadian brewing company seeks to solve the age old mystery: how long can beer sit in the snow before freezing?
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Judges says there were so many ethical lapses and scientific inaccuracies at the Washington State Toxicology Lab that breath tests should not be admitted as evidence in drunken driving cases
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
At least 17,000 bridges across the country have not had their two-year check up. But, hey, we're all getting a rebate check. Yee Haw
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
23-year-old journalist sentenced to death in Afghanistan for reading about women's rights on the Internet. Mission accomplished
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(208)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Soldier suicides reach record levels. The surge is working
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(257)
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Britney Spears admitted to UCLA Medical Center. Submitter taking bets on how long she'll stay this time
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(212)
 
(Winding Road)
 
 
 
Vermont offers to trade lifetime supply of driver's licenses in exchange for organs
source: news.windingroad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Jamestown Sun)
 
 
 
Brides now letting their grooms shoot them with paint balls in order to ruin their wedding dress for wedding photos. Wait, what?
source: jamestownsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The power of Christ compels you..... to go to jail
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this big-ass lightbulb
source: www-sk.icrr.u-tokyo.ac.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
B₃U₁T₁T₁S₁E₁C₃K₅S₁?
source: jcnemecek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(182)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 143: "One for the Road" Details and rules in Boobies. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(326)
 


Wed January 30, 2008
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Woman with vomiting daughter gets $123 traffic ticket. Cop said he would've let them go, but girl kept spinning her head around and taunting him in a demonic voice
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
I shot an arrow in the air / It killed that vicious dog right there / The suburbs cheer, the owner's down / You need a stronger chain there, clown
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
The only way to keep up "clean" ethanol production is to build more "dirty" coal plants
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(250)
 
(WPXI.com)
 
 
 
Parents call local news and health department when their precious little snowflakes have to endure a day of school using *GASP* backup generators
source: wpxi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Not News: Somebody parks their bike in front of a Goodwill store. News: Goodwill sells it. Fark: At 97% off
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
High school suspends regular chemistry lessons in favor of seven-week review for upcoming standardized assessment tests. Principal defends decision, saying "The way I see it, they're still learning science"
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Starbucks announces plans to close 1% of stores nationwide, effectively reducing the number of Starbucks on every city block to 27
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
$400-a-visit escort service was one of largest in Florida's history (with high-priced escort pic goodness)
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(Press Citizen)
 
 
 
Early "Wife of the Year" candidate spends all her husband's active duty pay on her secret boyfriend while hubby is serving in Iraq, serves him with divorce papers and leaves him deeply in debt when he returns home
source: press-citizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(378)
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
According to arrest records, Mickey Mouse is a 47-year-old African American man standing 5-feet, 9-inches and weighing 190 pounds
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Come for the skiing, stay for the Hepatitis
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
School's automated phone system accidentally makes 2,100 calls to parents saying their kids missed class. Hilarity, visits from Ed Rooney ensue
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this orbiting object
source: develop.larc.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(So Good)
 
 
 
You Double Dipped the Chip??? New Clemson study analyzes the levels of bacteria caused by double dipping
source: sogoodblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Chinese scientists have found way to control weather, guarantee they will "stop the rain" for Olympics opening ceremony. Creedence Clearwater Revival unavailable for comment
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(WTAE-TV)
 
 
 
Busch Light, Natural Light and Keystone Light rated best beers for Super Bowl parties
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
When a CNN split screen shows a white person, then a black person, then a white person, the anchor has the presence of mind to call it a "Reverse Oreo." It's not news, it's CNN
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Woman starts her own eBay consignment business so she can stay home and take care of her daughter with cancer. Now she faces fines up to $10 million for operating in PA without an auctioneers license
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Someone at this website has a sense of humor
source: producten.hema.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
400 Croatians dress up as Smurfs to try to break world record. Gargamel immediately books flight to Croatia
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
Kibble and Bits, Kibble and Bits, I'm gonna get me some...... OH MY GOD, BAD DOG BAD BAD DOG
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(293)
 
(WYFF)
 
 
 
Smartest Man Ever introduces legislation that will allow those serving in the military to buy a drink before they turn 21
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(412)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you get really drunk and let your friend brand your ass with a red-hot fireplace poker? This guy sure does. With video, er, something (warning: branded ass pic in link)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Texas Tripper)
 
 
 
When in Texas, say it like a Texan. Your guide on the pronunciation of some of the strangest sounding towns in the State. With audio goodness
source: texastripper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(306)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Manhattan hotel unveils new room made entirely of chocolate. Submitter is waiting patiently for the bacon room
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun. Also, a thumbtack
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
It's never comforting when the local D.A.R.E. officer gets busted for visiting websites like High School Cheerleader and Kinky Catholic Schoolgirls on a computer at the school where he teaches
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Polish nun cites "divine inspiration" for bestseller cookbooks, because not only can God do the whole "wine into water" thing, he's apparently quite handy around the kitchen
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(WINK News)
 
 
 
Bad hair day leads to robbery
source: winknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
That noise you heard? That's economic growth stalling
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(234)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rochester man blames restless-leg medication for his inability to keep his pants on in public
source: news.postbulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman accused of throwing roach poison on her neighbors ingests some herself to prove it's not dangerous. Welcome to Georgia, the state evolution forgot
source: andiamnotlying.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
America's most miserable cities announced. Who's number one? Hint: It's bigger than a breadbox, its NFL team is endorsed by God, and it truly ain't Rock City
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(331)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
U.S.: High oil prices could benefit Iraqis. Well, the Iraqis who own oil producing land, anyway. The rest of 'em are still screwed
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Space station astronauts make risky spacewalk; article writer mistakes "exasperated " for "exacerbated." It's not literate, it's CNN
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Cops hunting Morin. Greatest mugshot ever? The Smoking Gun is there
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Hello, I am from the Government, your talk show is insulting, stop broadcasting NOW. I am hanging up now, goodbye." Surprisingly, this worked rather well
source: weeklyblitz.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
A Mississippi teacher admitted to cops that she had sex with a 15-year-old male student to whom she sent explicit text messages and trysted with in her Jaguar, which bore the license plate "GRRRRR." (with mugshot goodness)
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(338)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Today's third-grade student brings gun to school brought to you by Sunset Park Elementary School
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Angry Customer)
 
 
 
Someday, someone will explain why your name, address and social security number are so important, they must be stored on laptops that people keep losing
source: baddadradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Today's hot teacher sex scandal involves hand holding and no sex
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Breitbart.tv)
 
 
 
FBI nabs crutch-leaning, gun-wielding, ninja-clad bank robber. Plethora of adverbs go free (video story)
source: breitbart.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Seven-week suspension of honor student stands. "The fact that I'm receiving emails from both coasts means this story is resonating." Behold the power of Fark. Behold the asshattery of Buffalo
source: buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Rudy Giuliani 81.81818182% sure he's going to drop out of the race now
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Gang of hammer-armed teenagers robs jewelry store, forgets that police have guns
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Some Math Geek)
 
 
 
Airline offers special deal in which all flight prices are fibonacci numbers. Submitter is holding out for the Pi sale
source: spiritair.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Texas school wants to suspend female student for her "unnatural kinky twist"
source: nbc5i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(235)
 
(NDTV.com)
 
 
 
Hen in Mexican village reportedly laying green eggs. Sam I Am immediately dispatched to scene
source: ndtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Horse faced sociologist who can't get a date decides that men under 30 should be called "child-men"
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(737)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman furious at being fined for littering after throwing apple core out of car window. "I think it's a ridiculous charge because apples are biodegradable"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(227)
 
(Rochester D&C)
 
 
 
What's the difference between an ordinary game of tag and a game of Darwin tag? One is played in the middle of a busy highway while drunk
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nanny State teachers forbidden from referring to pupils' parents as "mom and dad" because it's sexist and assumes they're not being raised by homosexuals
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(293)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bangladeshi fisherman caught flogging the dolphin
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Æ, Ø and Å, three letters the world can't understand. The Internet is killing the Danish language
source: cphpost.dk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(257)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Jerusalem shut down by snowfall; Israel now looking desperately for a way to blame the weather on the Palestinians
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(263)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Chicago to get $49 million for the homeless, but will probably blow it on booze
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(195)
 
(KTAR)
 
 
 
When hauling a van load of illegals, do not rear end another vehicle. Especially when that other vehicle is owned by the Department of Homeland Security
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Good news: Dumplings from China are not contaminated with lead. Bad news: They contain methamidophos, a toxic insecticide. Oh well, you win some, you lose some
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Good deed: Giving elderly driver directions where to vote in primary. Punishment: Elderly driver puts vehicle in reverse, run over helper
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Bitten and Bound)
 
 
 
Russian beauty and Moscow's top female celebrity bodyguard was killed trying to stop the carjacking of her Porsche. Anna Loginova, 1978-2008
source: bittenandbound.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(239)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Bank borks brazen burglars
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
4:20 24/7
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(232)
 
(WTMJ)
 
 
 
"Lady, I'm pulling you over for speeding, I have to search your car. And your privates"
source: 620wtmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(PhotoSig)
 
 
 
Photoshop this chess-playing cat
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
What's black and white and red all over?
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(160)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Police officer says the city illegally fired him because he had a heart attack while on duty
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man, 93, and his new 84-year-old bride plan to take a 1,600 mile RV tour for their honeymoon. And that's just the length of the traffic jam behind them
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
"I know students are coming solely because of Ron Jeremy," she said. "But as long as we get them in the seats, I know they're going to learn something"
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(ninemsn.com.au)
 
 
 
MySpace party douche Corey Worthington finds out about the downside of fame, as he gets his arse handed to him in a fight (with video)
source: news.ninemsn.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Coke bottle coffins? Egads, the gods must be crazy
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Good: Winning $1.8 million in the lottery. Bad: Losing $1.8 million dollars. Good: Winning $1.8 million dollars again
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(wigantoday)
 
 
 
"She was on her zimmer in the living room and she said, 'Mary I'm on fire,' so I said, 'Let's both go out." 77-year-old rescues 101-year-old
source: wigantoday.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Scientists finally develop a personal jetpack for the general public, although you only have 75 seconds of airtime before splashdown
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Short version: Chainsaw, attack, drinking suspected
source: wwmt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Crocodile makes himself at home on an Australian golf course. Carl Spackler flown in to resolve the situation
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(The Enquirer)
 
 
 
Kentucky wants its big rock back
source: news.nky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Brisbane Times)
 
 
 
Feminism takes another brave step forward with a speed dating event to pair rich elderly women up with hot young guys
source: brisbanetimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(158)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
John Edwards anounces he will drop out of race today to spend more time with his hair
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1015)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you have a half pound of pot in your car, maybe you should avoid throwing bottles at other vehicles
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(43)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Is that a crowbar in your pants or are you just robbing this church?
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(14)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Bicyclist shocked to learn he was riding improperly. Really shocked
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(127)
 
(Dorset Echo)
 
 
 
Ashes to ashes, funk to funky, follow mum's remains and let's get drunky
source: dorsetecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(wwmt)
 
 
 
Rob us once, shame on you. Rob us twice, dude, what were you thinking?
source: wwmt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If the roads are closed due to snow, you could always try to ski 124 miles home from school
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(25)
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
Congratulations, Toronto, on your new segregated school system
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(387)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Kinky man calls phone directory assistance 10,000 times for nightly scolding by operators
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(29)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
People in Haiti so poor they have to eat mud
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Pensioner uses his wife as cocaine mule, gets caught, blames wife. Who says romance is dead?
source: blackpoolgazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(MENonline)
 
 
 
Old and busted: "Get off my lawn." New hotness: "Get off my playground swing"
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(9)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
A man recycles everything and cancels his trash service, so he's sued by the city
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(108)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Air Canada flight diverted, crew drags psychotic co-pilot off plane, after picking wrong week to quit sniffing glue
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(79)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
For those of you keeping score at home, you drive on the parkway, park on the driveway, and swerve around drunkenly on the runway. Wait, what?
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(19)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Drunk footballer who parked his car in the middle lane of a motorway and fell asleep tries to blame it on referee
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(26)
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Medical equipment from Kennedy assassination, including a wheeled stretcher, a door, clock, trash can and a towel dispenser, have been moved to underground storage in Kansas for safe-keeping. You know, from hurricanes
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(34)
 
(Pocono Record)
 
 
 
If you left eight bags of body parts on the interstate in northeastern Pennsylvania, the police would like to have a few words with you
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(93)