If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
You might try our Headline Search for easier navigation here.
These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.
(Headline T-Shirts are still available for archive links.)
Sun December 30, 2007
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Munster Times)
 
 
 
Munster, Ind. paper looks back at its year of Not News. And it's not bad, from the town clerk accused of embezzling to feed her knitting addiction to the nervous bank robber who could say nothing but 'Thank you, come again'
source: thetimesonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Quebec man sells snowbank on eBay for $3,550. Eskimo who bought it now says he feels ripped off
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Bhutto's teenaged son to succeed her as party leader; fortunately we would never be so silly in the U.S. as to select an inexperienced person to fill an important government position just because he is the former leader's son
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(389)
 
(WTFark)
 
Plug
 
WHILE YOU WERE REAPING: Albuquerque Man Dresses As Grim Reaper, Haunts Cemetery, Quotes The WB's Angel.
 
 
(Some guy in need of support)
 
 
 
Times Square ball to turn 100, which explains why it hangs so low
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(AutoExpress (UK))
 
 
 
Police arrest suspect in rash of Christmas, lawn decoration thefts. It turns out he had cleverly hidden them in his own front yard, no word yet on Drew's gnome. [w/video report]
source: wnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you have a problem falling asleep on the job, maybe you're just not cut out to be a burglar
source: newsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Europe cancels massive New Years fireworks display over terrorist threat, despite the fact that could make it the most awesome fireworks show evar
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Lost diamond ring turns up in packed fudge
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Latest Western job to be outsourced to India: pregnancy
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Some Biker Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this easy rider
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Bozeman Comical)
 
 
 
Skiers activate their rescue beacon as darkness falls, are located hours later by six sheriff's deputies, 22 volunteers and an ambulance crew who courageously rescue them from their hotel room
source: dailychronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Turnto23)
 
 
 
Teacher arrested after asking two students if he could trace an outline of his penis for them. Kicker: He's charged with being annoying
source: turnto23.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Some Prophet)
 
 
 
Religious pilgrims trying to reach Egypt get stranded at the Red Sea, fear capture by Israel. It'll take a miracle to save them
source: jta.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
When cats design websites
source: papertoilet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Chauffeur busted after drag racing at over twice the speed limit...with the newlyweds in the back seat
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The 10 best rollercoasters on Earth
source: otbeach.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(209)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
San Francisco man keeps 100% of his 2007 garbage. Now wants to donate it to an artist, because you know, where else could they find garbage?
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Palm Beach Post)
 
 
 
20 deputies, two canine units and a police helicopter swarm shopping mall. Entire family arrested. Was someone: A) Terrorizing shoppers B) Robbing merchants or C) Wearing low pants? And if you look at the tag for a hint you're cheating
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(466)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
If you own an airplane you may have to pay sales tax on the plane in every state you fly through
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Not news: attempted robbery foiled. News: robber tried to use taxi as getaway vehicle, opened door into oncoming streetcar. Fark: robber charged with theft, opening a door into traffic
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 
(NY Daily News)
 
 
 
Here's the train. Got the luggage? Yes. Got your backpack? Yes. Got your book? Yes [bing bong - watch the closing doors]. Got the baby? Oops
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Don't buy enough booze at the bar? That's a beating, a frog-march to an ATM, and then an arrest. And I thought the girls at Starbucks who didn't get a tip were rough
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(volunteertv)
 
 
 
Customer who was shot at Hooters has died, assistant manager still in critical condition. Suspect still at large, and we're looking at you, Mr. Edge from U2 (see police sketch)
source: volunteertv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Three women with three un-belted toddlers in an SUV thought it would be fun to do some drinking and off road 'mud-bogging' at 70 mph. What could possibly go wrong?
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(NY Daily News)
 
 
 
When stealing a GPS unit, deactivate the "home" address
source: breakingnews.nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
And you thought your legal problems were bad: Attorney goes on the lamb with her policeman husband after spending tens of thousands of clients' money
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this snack exchange
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Small-town newspaper discovers something about online readers after several months: They like to read stories about weird news and dumb criminals
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(eBay)
 
 
 
Time travel is real, and it's available on eBay. Yes, it's $10 million, but you have 90 days to pay it. And if it works, you have a whole lot longer than that
source: cgi.ebay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(387)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
College tuition may be more than a lot of people can afford, but that doesn't mean you should commit armed robbery to pay for it
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Sure, the robber may have left a note saying "Sorry wrong house" but he still kept the things he stole
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(2008 is the year)
 
 
 
So what do you wanna accomplish in 2008?
source: happypuppy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(581)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
SeaWorld extends free admission offer to active-duty troops and their families. Hero tag goes to the troops
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Rocky Mountain News)
 
 
 
The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a recipe for making beer that could be used at home
source: rockymountainnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(150)
 
(Adn.com)
 
 
 
Ever wonder what the 7 wonders of Alaska are? Well, here you go
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Old and busted: suing file sharers. New hotness: suing legitimate customers for ripping a CD
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(357)
 
(On Dancer, On Prancer)
 
 
 
Photoshop a dance partner for this young lady
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Rolls Royce reveal some of their strangest customer requests, including a footbath to prepare for prayer and an elongated footwell to allow space for prostrate servants
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you have ever suffered from Anorexia Nervosa there's now a slim chance you can blame your mother
source: mailonsunday.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Cruise ship rams glacier in Antarctic; captain immediately orders free drinks for everyone on board. Now that's leadership
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Cindy Sheehan may hijack the Rose Bowl Parade
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(277)
 


Sat December 29, 2007
(Some Gourmand)
 
 
 
Worst food trends of 2007, courtesy of Epicurious
source: epicurious.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(300)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
The 2007 Texan of the Year? The illegal immigrant. There's another job taken
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Three dogs inherit $800K estate. Your dog is jealous, wants Filet Mignon now
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Dare to question why a cop is harassing you over a flicked cigarette? That's a christmas dinner with Bubba
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(310)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
In an effort to bridge cultural divides and promote understanding and tolerance, Malaysian government passes a law saying only Muslims can use the word "Allah"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Man calls police to report that someone stole his pot and his Playstation. Common sense unavailable for comment
source: weblog.signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Failing at abstinence-only, female elk in national park will go on birth control, which will surely turn them into sluts
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Man wants dog in bathroom while he showers with his girlfriend. Girlfriend disagrees. Man calls woman a name, woman punches man in face repeatedly, and it all ends up in a naked fight
source: komoradio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Topless woman in a park flirts with man then asks to see his penis. In related news, Penthouse Forum publishes its first arrest report
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(285)
 
(Some Jingle Bell)
 
 
 
Photoshop these sleigh bells
source: weaverleather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Oh, the "S" goes at the END of the restaurant's name
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(Lohud.com)
 
 
 
Having rid New York state of crime, corruption, high taxes, pollution, traffic, potholes, cockroaches, rats, silverfish, illegal immigrants and Hamptons asshats, state assemblywoman declares war on loud movie theatres
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The story a battered old pair of brown shoes can tell: a 200-mile escape over ice and snow, pursued by 900 Nazi soldiers
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Grumpy old man leaves waitress $50k. She must have stayed off of his lawn
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Clever immigrant smugglers discover real passenger capacities of vehicles (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(CBS2.com - KCBS Los Angeles)
 
 
 
New Osama bin Laden tape just released. His old stuff was way better, but that was before he lost his original bassist and drummer
source: cbs2.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(213)
 
(The Herald Dispatch)
 
 
 
WV city is littered with broken-down UFOs
source: herald-dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(HeraldNet)
 
 
 
Man blames car accident on pterodactyl attack. Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal
source: heraldnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Salisbury Journal)
 
 
 
American submitter has no idea what is going on in this story but is pretty sure somebody should have been locked up years ago
source: salisburyjournal.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man dressed as Santa kidnaps boss. Cousin Eddie unimpressed
source: nwanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(WIBW)
 
 
 
Pizza delivery driver fatally shoots would-be robber. Uncle Enzo reportedly impressed
source: wibw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Not news: man stopped for DUI. News: Man is tasered. Fark: for biting himself
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Japanese inmates complain about pajamas and room service. Obviously they've never slept in a Days Inn
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Just in case you missed that story about the Norwegian military promoting a penguin to Colonel in Chief of the Royal Norwegian Guard, here it is
source: nosheep.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Free Lance-Star)
 
 
 
Couple busted after woman reports bag of cash stolen from convenience store. Cops find boyfriend on tape walking out with money bag, and the $14,000 at her house
source: fredericksburg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(KTSM TV)
 
 
 
Tattoo artist and customer injured when the gun they were using as a model shot them both
source: ktsm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
When visiting the police station to check on confiscated money, don't arrive in a stolen car...with a small bag of pot plainly visible on the car's center console...and a gun plus another half-pound of smelly skunk bud under the seat
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
US troops clear out insurgents, build new base, start training Marines and Firebats in preparation for next Zerg rush
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(WPRI Eyewitness News)
 
 
 
Burglary suspect gives cops fake address when arrested; later gets robbed and gives cops his real address. Oops
source: eyewitnessnewstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Starting your own business? Be sure to leave enough room in your budget to bribe your local Congressman
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Photoshop Grover
source: wtimg.ny.publicus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(wnd.com)
 
 
 
Botanists abandon research near USA-Mexico border to avoid drug smugglers. 'I got kind of allergic to pistols being held to my forehead'
source: wnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Pakistanis identify Bhutto assassin, plan to chase him ineffectually for several years while invading some random country and burning down their Constitution
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Christmas Eve robbery masterminded by a nine-year-old. Bonus: the accomplice was five years old
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Drinking called "Scotland's national sport", narrowly edging out hurling, which is traditionally relegated to post-match celebrations
source: dailyrecord.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
High fat/high sugar diets found to be more harmful to obese people. In other news, crackheads should stay away from crack
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Reporter in Fark's favorite state sends out call to get better looking hookers
source: pensacolanewsjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Hottie nurse saves life of choking kitten by giving it mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. I can has yur phone number? (With pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(469)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Family outraged when dead man is upgraded to "mostly dead"
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Fighter pilot dressed as sheep goes down in flames
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Officer who captured runaway kangaroo puts the animal in his family's Christmas card photo (w/ pic)
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Kansas.com)
 
 
 
Wichita Police will conduct field sobriety and breath alcohol tests Monday on a group of volunteer drinkers to show the effects of alcohol on drivers. Mapquest servers crash due to Farkers printing driving directions to Wichita
source: kansas.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Number of parking tickets issued in Britain soars 400 per cent in just five years. It's not about the money, it's about the safety
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Civil War mortar crew
source: civilwarartillery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Survey finds two-thirds of people keep their ex-SO's number on their cell phone "just in case"
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Telegraph's predictions of 2008's big stories: "June: Based on its real-world GDP, Second Life is admitted to the G8, displacing Canada. The virtual world sends a purple woman with improbably large breasts to the summit"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Monkey stashed in plane passenger's hat dies. Authorities did not immediately confirm whether it was a man's big yellow hat
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
If you plan to set up shop installing snow-chains on the side of a highway, make sure it is actually snowing... and that you're not smoking pot in your car when the cops drop by to give you the weather report
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(wbtv.com)
 
 
 
74-Year-Old Man Jailed For Shoplifting $3 Sirloin. Forgot to use the "I'm an old man. I'm confused I thought I paid for it. What's my name? Will you take me home?" defense
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Intoxicated female flasher brightens the night for San Carlos Park, FL police (Mug Shot Hottie Alert)
source: naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Regardless of the topic, "this New Year's Eve, steer clear of Wyoming"
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
A handy list of new words and phrases that nonebrity turdbirds like you are going to need to know in 2008
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
You've just been arrest for your 13th DUI, what do you do? A) Cooperate with police. B) Try to explain yourself. C) Strip. (video included)
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Newsweek asks the hard-hitting questions about why a tiger would want to eat your face off after you jack around and dangle your tasty legs into an enclosure that has really low walls
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 


Fri December 28, 2007
(Some Thumper)
 
 
 
If your child's substitute teacher has blue hair and a nose piercing, she's probably a witch. Or a duck
source: shreveporttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Some cannibals)
 
 
 
Catholic Spin 101: Transferring a Priest who has been molesting mentally retarded dishwasher to an all boys school, not telling the school about his record, is a "breakdown in communication"
source: calcatholic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Some Fleabag)
 
 
 
Today's story of 237 Pomeranians in one house courtesy of Corpus Christi, Texas
source: star-telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
Bill Maher counts down his picks for the 13 biggest dickheads of the year. Obvious tag for #12
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(639)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
China's government assures loyal citizens that air quality in Beijing is improving. Scary pic says otherwise
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(ksal.com)
 
 
 
Kansas farmers are delighted with wheat prices hovering around $9 a bushel. The only problem is now they have to deal with thieves in search of GRRAAAIIIINNNSSS
source: ksallink.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Government orders daycare workers to resist their "natural instinct" to stop boys from using pretend weapons such as guns or light sabres in games with other toddlers
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Six-year-old writes heartbreaking essay about her dad dying in Iraq to win Hannah Montana tickets. It would be pretty sad if her dad had actually died
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Pakistan crisis won't interrupt Bush's month-long vacation. What, you expected him to rush back to Washington just because a nuclear power is on the verge of civil war?
source: firstread.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(298)
 
(Some Blech)
 
 
 
Jörg Blech examines the mystery of why some people practice geophagy, the habit of eating dirt. Jörg Blech? Come on, you guys have got to be making this stuff up
source: spiegel.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Canadian anthropology professor's research shows women think online dating is much like the same old bar scene and men frequently misrepresent their looks, interests, and marital status
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(Some Frog)
 
 
 
Smoking ban hits French cafe culture. Berets, thin moustaches, striped shirts, and existential angst next on the list
source: newsvine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Reminder: Phoenix Fark party tonight at the George and Dragon. LGT prevous thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
News: Reader's Digest gives each of its staffers a holiday cash bonus with the requirement that they use it to help others. Fark: The bonus was $5
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Pope declares war on Satan. Santa thanks FSM that the Pope isn't dyslexic
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(NBC4)
 
 
 
News: FAA restricts rechargeable batteries on flights. Fark: Because they can't figure out how to extinguish fires in non-rechargeable batteries
source: nbc4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Lohud.com)
 
 
 
Police officer's three-year-old daughter can eat only one thing -- a doctor-prescribed formula. What does the insurance company do? A) Gleefully refuse coverage, B) Cackle as they swim in their giant pool of fifties and hundreds, or C) Both
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(524)
 
(KDKA.com - CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
You win if you picked today for the "Atlantis launch to be delayed again" pool in your cube farm
source: kdka.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Al Qaeda in all kinds of trouble because they think it's okay to have killed Benazir Bhutto
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(Some Shadow Puppet)
 
 
 
Photoshop this shadow
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
Child-slapping babysitter being charged with cruelty to children, Submitter's eyes
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
"31 Ways to Meet a Quality Man," featuring 31 ways that don't work, each one occupying its own little URL of failure
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(314)
 
(WDSU)
 
 
 
Devil cast out from town's phones. And no, we're not talking about AT&T
source: wdsu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark's 2007 Headline of the Year contest, Round 4: October through December (details in thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
FDA regulators get a gold star for identifying over 14,000 pounds of E. coli tainted meat. However, they may need to beef their security after the truck it was in was stolen
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Some Nerd)
 
 
 
Netscape Navigator dies quiet death
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(303)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Insurance companies don't like the new "Toyotathon Phenomenon" ads, correctly believing that there are enough dumbasses out there who will be inspired by ads to commit fraud
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
82-year-old woman sues bank when they won't cash a 22-year-old check worth $20,000
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(258)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
The curvaceous Mazda Furai concept is pure automotive sex
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(Some Beer Drinkin' Guy)
 
 
 
So, has anyone seen Drew lately?
source: albanyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(KTVU San Francisco)
 
 
 
American diagnosed while overseas as infected with drug-resistant TB, takes crowded commercial flight back to the US. No, not that guy, a new one
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Microchips in your license? They're coming. Get out your tinfoil wallet
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Fast-food drive-through employee steals customers' debit card numbers, goes on shopping spree. In court, she pleaded "ngrrrt grreaphfy, yurff honnftr"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark's 2007 Headline of the Year contest, Round 3: July through September (details in thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Tiger victim was trying to protect his friend from mauling, only to be mauled himself. What fearful symmetry
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(400)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Buford Pusser Award: Small-town residents join low-speed police chase, but most get bored after 30 minutes in the parade. One steps up, crashes into suspect's car
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
Would you wait in line three hours to eat at The Cheesecake Factory? "I could drive to New York and get a fish sandwich in that time."
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(374)
 
(Some Zookeeper)
 
 
 
SF Zoo homepage has been updated to include a message of condolence for tiger victims. Maybe while they were in there, they should have changed their mission statement (on right of page)
source: sfzoo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man's attempt to elude police by wearing a wig fails spectacularly. Is there a pic? Oh you betcha
source: theintelligencer.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
A man has been hospitalized after he fell into a cement mixer. Police say there is no concrete evidence of foul play
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(The Daily Gazette)
 
 
 
Caption this totally not cute squirrel and its pumpkin
source: dailygazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark's 2007 Headline of the Year contest, Round 2: April through June (details in thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Teacher attacks student for telling him he looks like Simon Cowell, ensuring that the whole world discovers that he does in fact, look like Simon Cowell (with pic)
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
If you're growing pot in your basement, don't let your wife do mushrooms in your home and whatever you do, don't come to the door unless you're wearing pants
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
2007: The year fashion went EXTREEEEME. (Includes picture of model wearing $159,000 C-3PO legs)
source: lifestyle.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(The Times Record News)
 
 
 
Man breaks into a home and wakes the owners. He runs from the house, gets in his car and crashes into a snowbank at the end of the driveway. Five minutes later he knocks on their door and ask if he can come in because he was cold
source: timesrecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(KCTV)
 
 
 
Parents hire lawyer after their precious little snowflake finds her new mp3 player filled with porn
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Pensacola News Journal)
 
 
 
SWAT team called to deal with exploding squirrel
source: pensacolanewsjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Actual Headline: "Antarctic base staff evacuated after drunken Christmas brawl"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Connecticut to do for high school what the University of Phoenix did for college
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark's 2007 Headline of the Year contest, Round 1: January through March (details in thread)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Man acquitted of "assault by handshake" now suing. Can't we all just shake hands and... oh, guess not
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Five women with whom your girlfriend would agree to have a threesome
source: doubleviking.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(653)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The nerdiest bike you'll see today
source: rockthebike.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(This Is Local London)
 
 
 
Woman, 34, marries foster son she and her husband adopted from Kosovo seven years ago. Are the Mother of the Year nominations closed? (With pic)
source: thisislondon.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Hello Kitty makers seek to expand market by introducing line aimed at guys. "We think Hello Kitty is accepted by young men as a design statement in fashion"
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Some guy going 'ha-ha!')
 
 
 
Kid gets car for Christmas, takes it to the beach days later, promptly learns two important lessons: 1) It's pretty easy to get a car stuck in sand. 2) The tide comes in pretty fast
source: blackpoolgazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Knocking a drink from my hand? Well, that's just a trip through the window for you, isn't it?
source: bangornews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
News: Man vows to live on roof of bar until Ravens win a game. Fark: Thanks to all the news coverage, police know just where to arrest this man on his outstanding warrant
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Now playing in a Manhattan courthouse: "Star Trek 12: The Wrath of the Bogus Trek Memorabilia Buyer"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Not news: Student seeks Mustache Institute help to combat facial hair policy. News: There is a Mustache Institute
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Tribune Review)
 
 
 
When reporting car stolen, it's best not to push it over a cliff and try to recover insurance money for car and items removed from car later sold on eBay
source: pittsburghlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this "lady of the woods" into a more modern setting
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The latest wheeze in the Nanny State: Children must be given "unlimited time" to do standardised tests, to avoid stressing the precious little flowers unduly
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Majority of Brits would rather see Prince William as their king than anyone else, tell Prince Charles to get out of town, along with the horse he rode in on
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Normally, when the propeller falls off of your single engine airplane over the Rocky Mountains, things don't end well. Then there's this guy
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Postal workers who volunteer for Christmas duty say they get a special joy out of it. *Cough* time and a half *cough*
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Three-pound Chihuahua mix named "Tink" helps to nab fugitive
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you can't trust the people telling you God wants you to be a millionaire, who can you trust?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
News: Man solicits child for illegal sex act. Fark: While wearing a sundress, high heels and a black wig. Guess which state
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Today's burglar stuck in a chimney like a "grub in a cocoon" brought to you by Alice Springs, Australia
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
New Year's resolutions differ between men and women. Boiled down, it's that men resolve to change some aspect of their life while women resolve to change all aspects of their man's
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(ICNetwork)
 
 
 
If you're going to steal inventory from your company, don't then try to sell it on eBay. Or you can be like this idiot. Your call
source: iccoventry.icnetwork.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
"Market for doorknobs slowly losing its grip. Levers expected to gain upper hand one day"
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You drop a letter in a USPS mailbox and then regret it. Do you: A) Stick your arm down the slot? B) Contact the post office and ask them to retrieve it? C) Unbolt it from its concrete pad and drag it down the street?
source: lansingstatejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Law.com)
 
 
 
Prosecution unlikely over doctor's photo of patient's penis tattoo, he'll just have to go through life being known as the penis picture physician
source: law.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Man moves girlfriend, her kids from Ohio to Florida as part of homemade "Witness Protection Program." Then things got weird
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Dr. Phil thinks Lynne Spears is a great and dedicated mother
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tall glass of cool water
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(L.A. Daily News)
 
 
 
You know that "secret" email account you have for your "adult content"... it's not so "secret" anymore as the Adult-Entertainment Industry gets its servers' backdoor violated
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 


Thu December 27, 2007
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
New dollar coins unveiled featuring Larry Fine from the Three Stooges
source: willdo.philadelphiaweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Reporter confronts man, asks why he broke into 61-year-old neighbor's house to steal her underwear. Answer: "I was stoned and stupid"
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Thieves steal, destroy pair of 6-foot-tall, 100-pound nutcrackers. Suite
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(WOODTV)
 
 
 
One more case to consider in your Father of the Year voting: Man decides he's too drunk to drive so he makes his 9 year-old drive instead
source: woodtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Manbearpig. New hotness: Sheep-pig, back from extinction
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Spiderman, Spiderman sending strongly worded letters to his enemies, Spiderman LOOK OUT here comes the Spiderman
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
State symbol turns on its maker, as Idaho spuds cause firehouse blaze. Irony tag sobs with delight
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Headline: "Mall gunman admitted he was Satanic." Article: Not one mention of Satan or anything about Satanism
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 
(CCSU)
 
 
 
Study names Minneapolis 2007's "Most Literate City." Nerds
source: ccsu.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nine out of ten New Year's resolutions will fail, according to psychologists at the Institute for Pulling Numbers Out of Our Asses
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(iht.com)
 
 
 
Woman charged with domestic battery gets battery on police officer charge added after wiping her nose on officer's uniform. "Sometimes you need a police officer; sometimes you need a tissue. Confuse the two, and it could cost you"
source: iht.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Remember the GPS installed in the baby Jesuses to track the thieves stealing 'em? Got one
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Avoid holiday booze blunders: 1) Don't buy cheap booze, 2) Don't spill the booze, 3)... Wait, that's not what they mean?
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(Some Kleptomaniac)
 
 
 
News: Grocery store employee on break fired for stopping and detaining shoplifter. Fark: Store manager goes to scene and orders employee to release shoplifter
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(319)
 
(WTVT)
 
 
 
Man spends hours partying, watching strippers at all-nude gentlemen club, then passes away in private "Champagne Room." Can anyone think of more perfect way to die?
source: myfoxtampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(one really bored federal inmate)
 
 
 
Happy birthday to the greatest frivolous lawsuit writer in America: Mr. Jonathan Lee Riches©
source: news.justia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If the Nanny State has its way, you'll never be able to tell boys to "man up" again
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop a Fark Rose Bowl parade float (LGT examples)
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(419)
 
(NY Times)
 
 
 
List of notable people who died in 2007. Included is Richard Jewell, "hero of Atlanta Olympic bombing." Appropriate, but sadly too late, media
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Woman reports being attacked by seven-foot-tall suspect, covered in white fur. Claimed to have kicked him in groin, Yeti kept on going
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Pew Research)
 
 
 
Eighty-one percent of Republicans are satisfied with the way things are going for them financially, while only 54 percent of Democrats and Independents are. Suck it, broke-ass liberals
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(379)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Today's magic number: .55. If you don't know the rest, you're on the wrong site
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
County sheriff reprimands two employees for committing adultery. Public stoning scheduled for tomorrow at 0700
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(CBS4Boston.com)
 
 
 
Today's ridiculous media fear-mongering article: "How safe is the food in your fridge?"
source: wbztv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Energy analysts predict Americans will pay $3.75-$4.00 for a gallon of gas by Spring. Happy new year
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(293)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
San Francisco tiger attack upgraded to "Darwin Award" as kitty was taunted, had help escaping. Bloody shoe found inside enclosure provides clue. Catuday safe again
source: afp.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(620)
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
Allentown asshat receives "electronic tar and feathering" for suing eight-year-old skier
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(Lafayette Daily Advertiser)
 
 
 
City gets around public resistance to speed cameras by calling them red light cameras that happen to measure speed as well
source: theadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Worried about being the scene of the next Virginia Tech-like incident, many colleges are telling students with psychological issues to "fix it or GTFO"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(301)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
The Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York is offering the Average Joe a chance to weigh in with criticism of its new stupidly boring fashion exhibit
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
School district secretly installs hidden cameras outside locker rooms and bathrooms. Would've gotten away with it, if it wasn't for those meddling kids at the school newspaper
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
D.C. Fark Party reminder: Tomorrow, 7:00 p.m. at Rock Bottom, Bethesda
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(Toledo Blade)
 
 
 
Flying bra causes car crash and lawsuits, and dissolves friendship
source: toledoblade.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(The Australian)
 
 
 
Yeah, that money you gave the tsunami victims a few years back? It's being spent on politicians' pet projects. Suck it, charitable souls
source: theaustralian.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Here's the cutest photos of an overweight wombat stuck in a flower pot you'll see today
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
"Mean" former lunch lady is denied unemployment benefits after being fired for "refusing to give food to students who didn't have money"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(366)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Priests brawl in the Church of the Nativity. If only someone had some sort of guide they could turn to in times of strife, instead
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
People upset about excessive and complicated packaging are now caught up in wrap rage
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not news: Man says he is victim of identity theft. News: The identity thieves have caused traffic several accidents and run up $20,000 in parking fines. Fark: His name is Mohammed Ali
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Honey is making a comeback as a natural disease fighter
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Doctor concludes that driver-alcohol related deaths increase at year's end. You don't say
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
NYPD goes fabulous by replacing Kawasakis with Mopeds. They say it's greener, submittard says pinker. (With fabulous pic.)
source: xuecast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(My Fox DC)
 
 
 
D.C. is adding some style as more and more sleek, glass office buildings are being built downtown. Fark bonus: D.C. media can now report crimes as happening "within sight of the Capitol" from 82 new locations
source: myfoxdc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Rufus A. Bearsbutt)
 
 
 
Photoshop this policeman with his remote control aircraft
source: homepage.ntlworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Sky.com)
 
NewsFlash
 
Benazir Bhutto critically injured in suicide bomb attack at political rally. Update: Condition downgraded to killed
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2024)
 
(WMTW.com)
 
 
 
When a police officer lends you a pencil to help you arrange bail, it's best not to stab him in the head with it (with "I wouldn't stick my pencil in it" mugshot)
source: wmtw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Not news: Father buys daughter music CD for Christmas. News: Kids hear "F" and "N" words on CD. Fark: CD was supposed to be Hannah Montana songs
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Customs catches Canadian carrot carrier carrying copious quantities of chronic
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Must be a slow news day when there is a front page article about a 56-year-old toaster (with pic of said toaster, ooh ahh)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man walks up to stranger talking on cell phone and punches him repeatedly in the face after overhearing man say, "Your daddy." Deputies report suspect is "not at all sorry that he did it"
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
On top of women's 2008 wish lists? Losing weight, buying nicer clothes and marrying a rich guy
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(272)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Philippines customs seize inflatable sex dolls that were to be used in PETA protests over chicken abuse. Somehow
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Holidays are good times for you, your wife, family, mistress
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Local firefighters stay busy all night, responding to residents' repeated sightings of fog
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
Latest scam on street: Calling relatives of soldiers deployed to Iraq, asking them to wire money so soldiers can make it home for surprise Christmas reunion
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Not content with zoo tigers getting all the ink lately, circus elephant fatally crushes a handler
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Finding and keeping $11,000 at the scene of an accident? That's a decade in jail. Whatever happened to finders keepers?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(WXYZ.com)
 
 
 
Dumb: Man caught stealing. Dumber: From an unlocked police car. Fark: In the parking lot of the police station
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Some Color-Lovin' Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop the inside of this pretty balloon
source: boonedocks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Helsinki's resident of the year is an owl that likes soccer. YA RLY
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The NRA has hired hundreds of private investigators to track down gun owners whose weapons were seized after Katrina. Good luck, there, Charlton
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Scientists discover drug that reverses liver damage. Drinking yourself to death just got a little harder
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Police respond to next-door neighbor of Drew Peterson after she discovers dozens of photos of a cemetery scattered on her front lawn. And that's not the weirdest part
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 138: "Simply Beautiful." Details and rules in Boobies. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(304)
 


Wed December 26, 2007
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
You might be a redneck if you spend Christmas Eve wedged in a septic tank
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
PennDOT has a bridge they'd like to sell you. No, really
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Woman, surrounded by pack of pit bulls, lavished with cutesy puppy dog licks while she pets them. Wait. That should read 'Woman ripped to shreds in the street by genetic killing machines owned by irresponsible power-tripping douchebags'
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(463)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Up to 3/4 of all classical musicians may use performance enhancing drugs
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Army hopes to entice more female soldiers into the military by offering them new shoes (pic)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
F-15 groundings have caused Alaska to depend on the Canadian Air Force for protection. EVERYBODY PANIC No really: EVERYBODY PANIC
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(176)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Six bodies found at rural WA property
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(kptv.com)
 
 
 
Man walks into convenience store, claims to be Ozzy Osbourne, then whips out pistol on befuddled clerk. With surveillance photo that, well, looks remarkably like Ozzy
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A roundup of the wild, wooly, and truly strange news of Petaluma, CA Animal Enforcement, with cute-ass pics of a horse, a gator, and a pot bellied pig. Strange beats out Sappy by a length
source: www1.arguscourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Several hostages held by the FARC in Colombia since 2002 may be freed within hours, pending agreement from Colombian government. Man, it takes forever to get a FARC party organized
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(1010WINS)
 
 
 
Once again, NYC is the safest big city around. It also cooler than, more important, looks better, and has more money than Chicago
source: 1010wins.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(275)
 
(Strawberry Tallcake)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fallen berry
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Chattanoogan)
 
 
 
From the "Hold My Beer, I Want To Try Something" files comes this story of a pickup truck, a TV news crew, and a jailarious altercation with... a jail
source: chattanoogan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Most parents of precious huge lard choked snowballs don't see the problem
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Little Brit yobs lobbing stones at lorries cause one to careen orf dual carriageway into tree killing dishy secretary. If yeh know which sodding dustbin lid did this, the rozzers would fancy to hae a dickey bird
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"Chen said he sued because he believes that, under China's law and the Communist Party's declared policies, the censors had no right to scratch his musings off the Internet."
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Yellowstone National Park wants to allow visitors to carry guns. Because if you're American, you just can't enjoy a day in the wilderness without being able to kill someone if the mood strikes you
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Not News: Car parked in tow away zone gets towed News: With kids inside the car. Fark: Parents left them in there to appear in court and are now suing the towing company
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Washington State considers bicycle licenses to hold riders accountable for actions, costs
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(294)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Charges dropped against steak knife girl
source: myfoxorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
Marijuana may inhibit cancerous tumor growth. Is there anything that pot can't do?
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(269)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
New elf academy in Finland begins training next year's class of elves in the survival skills they need - and at graduation, they have a lot more marketable skillls than a liberal arts major (pic)
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
17 year old American girl buys school for Cambodian children. What were YOU doing at that age?
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Cars will cost thousands more, light bulbs six times as much, and electricity's price will go up 30%. But don't worry, it's for the children
source: mercextra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(305)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
San Francisco Chronicle asking readers to pick top strange news stories of 2007. If only there were some website where people could read about strange news stories on a daily basis
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The secret to saving failing schools? Firing the incompetent teachers who work there, at least according to report by experts that teachers' unions will fight to their dying breath
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(243)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Two 1,500-year-old Bangladeshi statues of Vishnu stolen from airport warehouse. Where are your gods now?
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man gets up before dawn on Christmas to deliver few more presents to mother's house. Winds up delivering baby for woman on sidewalk
source: heraldonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"Women are women, they always want to look good"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(280)
 
(ZDNet)
 
 
 
FBI aims to build world's largest biometrics database
source: news.zdnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
300 lb. tiger that attacked at San Francisco zoo did not get out through an open door. They believe she got across a 15-foot moat and climbed 20-foot walls
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(513)
 
(Press Enterprise)
 
 
 
Rancher hosts Civil War battles, motocross and topless photo sessions. Unfortunately, not all at the same time. Police not amused
source: pe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Virginia legislator who came up with the $3550 speeding ticket now wants to jail the 500,000 motorists expected to be unable to pay those massive fines
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(213)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Research firm discovers that hitting the "reply-all" email button costs the U.S. economy $650 billion every year. Think how much Drew has cost the economy
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Your dog wants high-fat beef that will lower his cholesterol. It will only cost you $65 per pound. But he is your best friend
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(History.com)
 
 
 
Happy Kwanzaa
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(492)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Lawyers reach a new height: seeking to have teacher's suicide recognized as workplace casualty
source: nhatkyviet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Smoke Free Zones. New hotness: Profanity Free Zones. Subby: STFU & GBTW
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Reporter laments that people will not pay for news online, will only pay for not news
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Environmentalists aren't too happy about America's recent effort to reduce dependence on foreign oil
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(353)
 
(Some B/W Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Colorize this misty photo of the hills of Tuscany
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Times-Argus)
 
 
 
Man, tripping heavily on 'new' hallucinogen, runs into traffic after stripping naked. Naked dude running into traffic trifecta now in play
source: timesargus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Caption this photograph of Rudolph Giuliani with his gift
source: d.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dog saves family from fire, perishes after trying to find family's other dog; selfish cat makes it out OK
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Hospitals urged not to decorate children's wards with paintings of clowns, for fear of upsetting young patients. Still no cure for mimes
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Man takes his Dance Dance Revolution skills onto the interstate. Cops not impressed with his Pants-Off Dance-Off
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
You are the lucky owner of the Model ZVZ156 Vangplotz High-Digenation Wide-Scringe Framulator, Series 7000, with fernillated quick-response Worzel™ and 20,000 zurlebytes of scringe-view quorms
source: opinionjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Kitsap Sun)
 
 
 
Woman beats up drunk ex-boyfriend who "woke up to use the restroom, but was so confused he urinated in the closet"
source: kitsapsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
After an anonymous 911 call about a man with a gun, cops show up at mall and taser the wrong guy and his wife in a busy food court
source: madison.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(387)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Two brothers drown after jumping in river without knowing how to swim. Family wants warning signs posted
source: palmbeachpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(The Pittsburgh Channel)
 
 
 
Man whose lawn Christmas decorations were stolen posts sign in yard offering remaining decorations to thieves
source: thepittsburghchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
President for the School for Deaf and Blind retiring. No one remembers seeing or hearing from her in years
source: myrtlebeachonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Photoshop this gingerbread house
source: wtimg.ny.publicus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Not News: Milwaukee sets up radar speed trap. Fark: To catch sledders
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Anchorage Daily News)
 
 
 
The wife of Iditarod champ is mush
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
82 percent of Americans identify themselves as Christians; the other 18 percent presumably volunteered to work Christmas day and refused all gifts that they were offered on principle
source: news.monstersandcritics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(415)
 
(The Tennessean)
 
 
 
Tennessee man after soliciting sex from undercover cop: "I should have known something was up, she had all her teeth.''
source: tennessean.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Empire State News)
 
 
 
Underage Amish kids holding drinking party at lumber mill busted after one of them calls 911
source: empirestatenews.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(CBS2Chicago.com)
 
 
 
Chicago cop doesn't beat anyone up and still makes the news
source: cbs2chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(MyFox Orlando)
 
 
 
Not News: Burglars Break into Man's House. News: Man chases the intruders out of the house with a baseball bat as police arrive. Fark: Police arrest homeowner and allow the burglars to run free
source: myfoxorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 


Tue December 25, 2007
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If you're carrying weed, it is best not to throw walnuts at police officers
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Construction on Boston's $14B Big Dig is finally complete, only $12B over budget
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(160)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
You think your Christmas dinner was painful? Try being mauled to death by a tiger in a zoo cafeteria
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(218)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Egypt to claim copyright on pyramids, failed to read the bit about "life of creator + 70 years"
source: afp.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(Some Cold Guy)
 
 
 
Leaving an underage drinking party on a blustery winter night do you A) Flee from police in your car B) Flee into the woods without shoes C) Break into a garage and hide in a car all night? Frostbite ensues
source: ironmountaindailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
It was your dad that answered everyone's letters to Santa every year (site Farked; article pasted in first post)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this trade show booth
source: img.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Scotland to put drunk driving ads in video games. Killing cops, stealing cars, running over pedestrians, and using cheats all still O.K
source: newswatch50.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
With the price of food skyrocketing, it's unlikely that 70% of Americans will be overweight by 2015. If there's one thing we love more than gluttony it's greed
source: savingwithoutabudget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(183)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Dead guy sends Christmas cards to family and friends, says he'll see some of them sooner than they think
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Twas the night before Christmas and from out of the pipes / Came a flood of raw sewage, of various types / When they couldn't reach maint'nance, they then cleaned up the floor / And then passed out and woke up and saw worse than before
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
After receiving 29 parking tickets, owner tracks down her stolen car... two blocks from the police station
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Texas lottery players fail to collect $449 million in winnings. Fark needs a plural "Dumbass" tag
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Loss of Arctic sea ice could harm walrus, goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Beloved leader of country even fixes television sets for his people. Is there anything Kim Jong-Il can't do?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Slow news day: Woman discovers she is allergic to Christmas trees
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Press of Atlantic City)
 
 
 
Post your "scared of Santa" pics here. Re-runs and old classics are OK. Merry Christmas
source: pressofac.mycapture.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(PhotoSig)
 
 
 
Photoshop these blurred dancers
source: photos.photosig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(NewsMax)
 
 
 
California court rules there is no such thing as private property
source: newsmax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
"Cigna stands by decision on transplant. The insurer defends its initial denial of a liver procedure for a teen who died last week"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(421)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Humbug, the law that banned Christmas
source: lawprofessors.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Pacific News Center)
 
 
 
Congress votes to make your state quarter map obsolete
source: pacificnewscenter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
It wouldn't be Christmas on Fark without at least one story of a drunk naked guy plowing his car into a garage. Happy Holidays, everybody
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Who would have thought this would ever happen? Hero trumps Sappy
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
6.2 magnitude quake hits Japan. No word on possible tsunami. Large Caucasian man in red suit seen near epicenter wanted for questioning
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Man goes to the police station to lodge a complaint, winds up tearing an air conditioning unit out of the wall and setting a police SUV on fire
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Rival Pennsylvania towns mimic New York's Times Square on New Year's Eve - By dropping giant pickles, Kisses, wrenches, and now potato chips (w/giant bag o chips pic goodness)
source: lewistownsentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Laughing Man)
 
 
 
Japanese man dumps his panty collection, DNA recovered. Charges for 1994 murder pending
source: yomiuri.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"Woman battered by plate of burgers." Mayor McCheese asks to lettuce end this violence
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
LAPD arrests 280-pound man dressed in Santa hat, red lace camisole, purple G-string, and black leg warmers for DUI. Thankfully, this article has no pics
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Some Type Dorkette)
 
 
 
Photoshop this ancient relic
source: glen.utdallas.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Arizona Star)
 
 
 
If you're a cross-dressing liar who wants to marry a Japanese woman for her money, don't do it in Arizona
source: azstarnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
For the eighth time in the last nine years, beer consumption in Germany declines, as Germans begin drinking other non-alcoholic drinks
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Daily Snack)
 
 
 
Hitler please
source: dailysnack.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(Information Liberation)
 
 
 
China clinic gives 'web addicts' shock treatment. No word if treatment uses USB-enabled device
source: informationliberation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Man missing in the wilderness near Humptulips found safe just in time for Christmas. In related news, submitter now can't stop saying 'Humptulips'
source: komotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Hangover Prevention 101
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Castro's brother says zombie Fidel has full control of his faculties, BRAIIINS
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Kingston Daily Freeman)
 
 
 
Ceiling fan is watching you
source: dailyfreeman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
So that's how Santa does it
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Today's naked knife fight brought to you by Brooklyn
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Cops taser urinating man
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Man demonstrating how he would kill companion with a nail gun shoots himself
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Top Ten T-Shirt slogans for 2007
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Putin's dog wanders off, so he launches satellites to track her. Your dog wants geostationary steak
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Balltown, Iowa)
 
 
 
If you never ate at Iowa's oldest continually operating restaurant ... well, you missed your chance
source: kcrg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(CBS2Chicago.com)
 
 
 
Woman stabs husband to death while he slept because "he keeps inviting people over in the apartment and she wasn't going to take it anymore" (w/mugshot)
source: cbs2chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Google Maps and NORAD are working hard, as always, to update Santa's movements every five minutes on this crucial day
source: northpole.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(270)
 


Mon December 24, 2007
(ABC)
 
 
 
Caption the anchorman freaking out at the sight of a van crashing into the newsroom
source: i67.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Kyrgyzstan declares itself the new home of Santa. Mr. Klwz too busy to comment
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Today's TMJ 4)
 
 
 
Gas station employee fed up with daily occurrence of armed teens demanding gas and merchandise fights back. Weapon of choice: a stick, which the thugs promptly took and beat employee with
source: todaystmj4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Some Convict)
 
 
 
Not news: Couple gets married. News: groom is jailed convict. Fark: Marriage in courtroom with groom in striped prison uniform and handcuffed. "It doesn't matter what I am wearing, she makes me feel warm inside"
source: wlwt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Airlines reluctant to start offering internet services aboard because of the mile high fapping club
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Uglyass baby elephant joins the herd. No word if he'll be a taxi, entertainer or artist but he does come from a performing family [w/pic]
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy driver
source: ufoseries.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"The only state that has earned its own category on farq.com and newsoftheweird.com, Florida is a veritable wellspring of wacky and weird people." Farq.com?
source: blogs.tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: Shoplifting.....New Hotness: Shopdropping
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Public Radio)
 
 
 
For just $195, you can buy a family in Lesotho a pig. Bacon trifecta complete
source: marketplace.publicradio.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Boston Celtics fans caused the War on Drugs
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
The cutest video you will see today, brought to you by two baby pandas
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Pew Pew Pew Research)
 
 
 
The key to happiness? Going to church every week. Really
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(467)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
North Dakota farmer forecasts weather via pig spleens. Bacon trifecta now in play?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Three oversize queens set to meet in New York harbor, and for some reason the media is making a big deal about this
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Step 1: slip on pigeon poop. Step 3: profit. And if you're a New York taxpayer, you are going to be very annoyed by Step 2
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
The coming financial meltdown will make the '29 crash look like "a walk in the park." EVERYBODY PANHANDLE
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(296)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Man shoots cans, he hates these cans. Police arrest the jerk for shooting them inside a frat house
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Immigration: Fence not working, switching to moat
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Toilet tragedy jiggles the handle of compassion
source: yourbiz.msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A redneck Trans Siberian Orchestra holiday lightshow
source: video.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Good: scratching a lottery ticket that says you won $25,000. Bad: then scratching off a line that reads, "All winners are losers and must have an excellent sense of humor."
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Farkette at work on Christmas Eve)
 
 
 
"Hurry up, dude. It's Christmas Eve. Stores will generally close around 6 p.m. . .That's it. Not a lot of news today." Ah, the honesty of small-town papers
source: themercury.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Theme: Create a pictogram advertisement. Difficulty: PICTOGRAMS ONLY -- no photographs. Link goes to inspiration
source: clioawards.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
70% of Americans will be overweight by 2015: "Ima gonna eat chu"
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(219)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Linus and the meaning of Christmas. Suck it, War on... you know what, nevermind. Peace on Earth, good will towards men
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Gas prices fall below $3 which will magically allow consumers to pile on more holiday debt. It's a Christmas miracle
source: dailyfueleconomytip.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Amazon.co.uk)
 
 
 
You'd think the buyer reviews for the average Bic ballpoint pen would be uninteresting. And you'd be wrong
source: amazon.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Some Real Baconator)
 
 
 
Perfect Christmas recipe: from the creator of Bacon Cereal comes the Bacon Cheese Baconburger, with bacon mustard. Bacon
source: speakeasy.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(The Columbian)
 
 
 
After police were ordered to write more speeding tickets, speed-related crashes in Clark County, Washington increased 23% this year
source: columbian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Live Free or Die)
 
 
 
Cops from five NH police agencies stop 514 cars at "sobriety checkpoint." Eight arrested for DWI. Your tax dollars at work
source: seacoastonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(466)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A pint of beer could cost £4 ($8) in Britain's pubs next year. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Rian.Ru)
 
 
 
Singapore officials plan to sell every item Maria Sharapova uses during her one-night stay at a hotel next weekend, except for the toilet seat
source: en.rian.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook