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Sun October 07, 2007
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Some Dollar Bill)
 
 
 
Ovulating strippers get better tips. Here comes the science
source: sciencenow.sciencemag.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(153)
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
The real Charles Schultz: Crabbier than Lucy, more competitive than Peppermint Patty, and far more bitter than Charlie Brown
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(210)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Gang break into Paris art museum, nothing stolen but they left an impression on a Monet
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(Fark)
 
Plug
 
Totalfark: It's like a speed trap on the information superhighway
 
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
What do you get when you cross a sickle, a brick, and a push lawnmower? One heck of a birthday party
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
E·piph·a·ny n. - 1. A an illuminating discovery, realization, or disclosure. - 'The new owner of EMI had an epiphany and realized that recorded music industry needs to embrace digital or die.'
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(WAOI .com)
 
 
 
After years of Fark headlines telling her what dogs want, to stay off lawns, and complaining there's still no cure for cancer, teen does all three at once and invents cure for dog cancer
source: woai.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Police launch frantic air and sea search for missing boater whose wrecked vessel washed ashore, locate him several hours later. At his mom's house. Drunk. Lying on the sofa
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Crazed shirtless man barges into BBQ restaurant kitchen, grabs several long knives, goes back out into street, knocks down elderly woman with running tackle and stabs her, gets shot by cop at point-blank range. Ta-daa
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Pensacola News Journal)
 
 
 
Barktoberfest. Doggy Halloween. I Shih Tzu not
source: pensacolanewsjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "MILF cautions against 'witch-hunting.'"
source: sunstar.com.ph   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Chicago marathon cancelled with one death and 302 hospitalized
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
17-year-old student arrested for possessing a copy of the "Anarchists' Cookbook"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(354)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Man faces 30 yrs to life for stealing a 52 cent doughnut
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(353)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Stinky feet led to Houston man's fatal stabbing
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
From the maker of such hits as "The Air is Safe at Ground Zero" and "Pay No Attention to Those Dead Fish," the EPA brings you "Methyl Iodide: It Won't Cause Cancer, Really"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
10-year-old boy leads police on a 44 mile long chase at about 25 mph in a stolen school bus. Sandra Bullock unavailable for comment
source: apnews.myway.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Wausau Daily Herald)
 
 
 
Hmoob lubneej tseem tswj cov raug tsimtxom
source: wausaudailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(241)
 
(WTMJ)
 
 
 
At least six people dead in Wisconsin, cop may be the killer
source: 620wtmj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(267)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
♫ Greeeeen Acres is the place to be / Farm calendar for charity / Shows naked farmers and their wives / Keep the parents, just show me their daughters' hides ♫
source: afp.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Some Burning Man)
 
 
 
Photoshop the Big Rig Jig
source: bigrigjig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Nigeria initially denies Bill Gates' application for a visa stating that he had to prove that he would not reside in Nigeria indefinitely, causing a strain on social services and a general nuisance for immigration
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Bush fondly remembers times as Texas Governor, attempts to halt execution. Wait, what?
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this baby lemur
source: flickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
All those walruses washed up on the Alaskan shore due to melting sea ice... nope, nothing to worry about, no global warming, just a liberal attack on science, move along
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(249)
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Elderly Southern man fights to continue honor of Confederate flag, which draped his grandfather's coffin (w/ somewhat surprising pic)
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(363)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man and his puppet
source: files.blog-city.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Baltimore's near-record streak of days without a murder shot down at 7
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(KPRC)
 
 
 
Middle school students caught having sex in middle of occupied classroom. Film at 11
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(152)
 
(Some Tfette)
 
 
 
Caption these excited freaks
source: media.collegepublisher.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Some Sad Submitter)
 
 
 
The most powerful image you will see today
source: img393.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(503)
 
(Subby's fave)
 
 
 
Which TV family's home had the best layout?
source: munstermansion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(322)
 
(God Calling)
 
 
 
Scandal at Oral Roberts University includes private jets, luxury cars, and the dean's wife texting "underage males" asking if they want to show her their cucumber
source: news.aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
When being arrested, giving the officer a "Wet Willie" isn't going to help matters
source: examiner-enterprise.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Reno Gazette-Journal)
 
 
 
Ohio couple marries in lawn & garden section at Wal-Mart. Their first date was in the furniture department. The couple have plans for a week long honeymoon at Sam's Club
source: news.rgj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
An enterprising young chap conned the British Royal Navy into subsidising his "football club" which then proceeded to go on a 2 week orgy involving booze and young girls. Nicely done, guvnah
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 


Sat October 06, 2007
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Zimbabwe is running out of food, so the government takes swift action by prosecuting 10 white farmers for growing crops on their land
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(242)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
U.S. troops "being force-fed Christianity." Suck it, atheists
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(790)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Tobacco industry accused of "stealth marketing" smooth, sweet cigarettes (that make you 40% cooler to the opposite sex) on social networking websites
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Rocky Mountain News)
 
 
 
"Police arrest 83 people after protesters poured a bucket filled with fake blood and dismembered baby dolls onto the street." Just another Columbus Day parade in Denver
source: rockymountainnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Montgomery Advertiser)
 
 
 
I'll take Embarrassing Autopsy Reports for $1000, Alex
source: montgomeryadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby dolphin calved in Rimini, Italy. With great, cute-ass pics
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Disco ball falls on woman's head. Victim: "I will survive", hopes lawsuit-larity will help to turn the beat around
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Rhode Island's cunning plan to treat 17 year olds as adults in the court system is actually costing more, confusing the court system, and sending kids who would have been sent home before off to be fresh fish for the night in PMITA prison
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
As there is apparently no news left in the world. TIME magazine features a story about the amazingly modern notion of men being able to change diapers, do laundry
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
US Judge orders Iran to pay $2.65B to families of 83 Beirut bombing. Ahmadinejad pauses from searching for homosexuals to comment, "Good luck collecting. Suck it world"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(193)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Scientists, with obviously nothing better to do, have come up with a new currency designed to be used by inter-planetary travellers
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Man ends 13 year journey around the world using only the power of the human body. FTA:"The 16-leg journey included hiking, kayaking, mountain biking and hiking."
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(NewsMessenger)
 
 
 
Family knows how to party for Halloween: "...they'd see as many as 50 children standing in a heavy fog drinking blood, eating bugs and wandering around a picnic table covered with pickle jars filled with real cow organs."
source: thenews-messenger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these girls jumping on their bed
source: i213.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Judge blocks required background checks of scientists at NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory. It's almost as if these rocket scientists had something to hide
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Sentinel and Enterprise)
 
 
 
School invites parents to wine tasting. Or as they say in Massachusetts, school attempts to turn innocent children into drug addicts
source: sentinelandenterprise.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Youths of unspecified religious affiliation attack police and riot in France
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Museum's best-selling T-shirt, featuring native Americans, is removed from shelves after one namby-pamby complains
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(197)
 
(kfor.com)
 
 
 
Miss America Lauren Nelson, who advocates safe online surfing, introduces kid safe browser
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(What Car?)
 
 
 
Man bills £4000 to insurance after gay peacock "sexually attacks" his employee's Lexus, advises other employees not to bring their sexy blue cars into the estate
source: whatcar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
CIA certifies that Pervez Musharaf has won a majority of votes in Pakistani presidential election
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
What's the next car company the UAW is bound and determind to take down with them? If you picked Chrysler, you win the office pool
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
If you see Alberto the møøse, Calgary Zoo would like him back before the impending start of møøse hunting season
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
War? Old news. Lying cheating politicians? Snore. Strike at the bacon factory? STOP THE PRESSES
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Three-year-old survives eleven days in Amazon jungle. Rumored to have been aided by panther and goofy singing bear
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
"We got more information out of a German general with a game of chess or Ping-Pong than they do today, with their torture"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(473)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
There are a lot of dumb judges out there, but this one is so bad the upper court sent him back to judicial school
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(AutoExpress)
 
 
 
Having solved all other crimes, UK initiates crackdown on license plates that use the Comic Sans font
source: autoexpress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Some Cat Lover)
 
 
 
To help with your lolcat creation, here's a handy tree chart. Oh, and for this Caturday, voting has been enabled
source: mikehuang.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(678)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
77-year-old psychic, wanted for fraud, uses her amazing powers to evade capture by police. Just kidding, they found her hiding under a blanket in a closet
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Emus, sloths, and squirrel monkeys now classed as "household pets" in Britain, but you're still gonna need a license for your pack of dingos
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Only survivor from Congo air crash that's killed 51 is the mechanic
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Google)
 
 
 
Photoshop this robot and girl
source: images.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Replica of the Wright Brothers plane crashes during historical demonstration. You're not doing it Wright
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
This green light is "of enormous importance for the whole country," according to the prime minister of Britain, submitter
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Criminal charges mysteriously dismissed after man does 50 push-ups in court
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Not news: DUI. News: At 237 km/h blowing red lights in the city. Fark Father of the Year Nomination: With baby daughter on board
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A skunk with a jar stuck on its head wanders into a police parking lot. Then it gets weird
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Surely there's more to report about than the street lights going off everytime a woman boils a kettle? And yes, proper street lights
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(KING5)
 
 
 
TV station is shocked, SHOCKED to learn that insurance companies really don't want to pay out claims
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Condoleezza Rice announces that dozens of federal agents will be sent to monitor the 20,000+ kill-happy Blackwater mercenaries in Iraq
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(WVLT)
 
 
 
School administrators defend teacher's right to post her half-nekkid pics on the web
source: volunteertv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Man arrethted for theft afther cutting hith own tongue out
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
The average woman absorbs two kilograms of chemicals a year from cosmetics. How it gets from upper cheeks to lower remains a mystery
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(wvgazette.com)
 
 
 
Vote on West Virginia's state slogan. "What happens in your cousin, stays in your cousin" still not eligible
source: wvgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ten places where not to find a date. Clearly the author doesn't know about Fark on a Friday night
source: ca.dating.personals.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
After his best friend died at Columbine, Luke Milam vowed to go into the Navy, become a hospital corpsman and prepare himself so he would be ready to save lives under fire. And that's what he died doing
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(243)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Man goes to police station to pay traffic tickets, is mistaken for another with same name, gets jailed for 37 days. How fast can you spell L-A-W-S-U-I-T?
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
"Sibu the orang-utan has miffed his Dutch keepers by refusing to mate with females and showing sexual interest only in tattooed human blondes."
source: africa.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Thousands of Italian men to be offered cash by the government to get them to move out of their mom's basements. Your mom is intrigued by this idea, would like you to get off the computer so she can subscribe to their newsletter
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(wwmt)
 
 
 
Bad: being fired. Worse: for taking too much time off work. Farked up: becaue your 2 year old daughter is getting cancer treatments
source: wwmt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 


Fri October 05, 2007
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Sorry, New Yorkers, but charging $1000 for your pizza still doesn't make it better than Chicago's pizza
source: potw.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(465)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bus station
source: i49.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
DEA actually returns $23K in cash wrongly seized. Fark needs a "shocking" tag
source: abqtrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(138)
 
(FP Passport)
 
 
 
Jakarta officials use a steamroller to crush 35,065 bottles of booze seized during Ramadan. And there was a great distrubance in the force
source: blog.foreignpolicy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Today's police call involving 27 poisonous snakes, guns, a plumber and his alligator brought to you by El Cajon, California. A guy could have a fun weekend in Vegas with all that
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Weather forecasters predict a warm winter. Time to stock up on long johns and wool socks
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(WWL-TV)
 
 
 
11-year-old has "need for speed," tops 100mph in chase with Louisiana State Police. Someone is losing TV privileges for at least a week
source: wwltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
A scandal of biblical proportions is brewing at Oral Roberts University
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(274)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
If at first you don't succeed -- try, try again
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(NBC5i)
 
 
 
Mother says Wal-Mart Halloween display has given her precious snowflakes bad dreams. Nightmare-inducing pic included
source: nbc5i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Wal-Mart getting sued by Down's syndrome man with irritable bowel syndrome. There's a joke there somewhere, but Subby is trying to avoid going to hell
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Bungie unassimilated. Master Chief unavailable for comment
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Jury awards woman $6.1 million for choosing to engage in role-playing and sexual activities at work
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(498)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Duke lacrosse players file lawsuit against everyone involved in rape case. Duke su... er... maybe not
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(WLTX)
 
 
 
Parents complain to school board after their 17-year-old son was elected homecoming queen. Bonus: He ran for the position
source: wltx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(144)
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Investigative journalism at its finest: Inside Ladies' Night. Giggity
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(184)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Southwest Airlines will not be happy until all its passengers are flying in burkhas
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Alaskan tourism industry hoping new movie about a clueless young man who died of starvation in the wilderness will boost tourism to the state
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(293)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
"Proof" that NASA knows about the alien base on the Moon and airbrushed the pictures
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(327)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
A man walked into a bank, needin' a fresh load of crank. So a note he did flash, and fled with the cash, the cops are drawing a blank
source: wcsh6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Yukon News)
 
 
 
Hollywood's most annoying couples: "It's a classic boy-meets-girl story: Boy's movie career is flagging. Girl signs a contract to remain in relationship with boy. Boy and girl get married by aliens" (Sponsored link)
source: maximonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Why Fark has a Florida tag: mom picks up son at school bus stop, then threatens other 6th graders with gun yelling, "You can all get some of this."
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(237)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge Extreme: Complete this Da Vinci sketch
source: monkeytripping.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Media report on missing pregnant woman who is not white
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(102)
 
(Orange County Register)
 
 
 
Prosposed bill would prevent newly recognized indian tribes from building casinos for 25 years. So what are they expected to do until then, drink?
source: ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(CBS4Boston.com)
 
 
 
U.S. marshals pose as supporters and then arrest convicted tax evaders holed up in home for nearly a year. Awkward
source: wbztv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(560)
 
(Sky News)
 
 
 
Dark-haired couple decide to end joshing from friends by taking a DNA test to prove their fair-haired angel is theirs. Turns out their friends were right
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(293)
 
(Sky News)
 
 
 
Prince Harry celebrated for bravely NOT going to war in Iraq
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Researchers seek out the 8% of unmarried Americans who have kids to discover that 61% of them think it's okay for other unmarried folks to have kids. It's not news, it's Yahoo News
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(Post Gazette)
 
 
 
Woman sues Kmart over $.28 tax she was charged on a pack of toilet paper. Fails to realize that even if she wins, Kmart has no money to pay her back
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Today's airport evacuation brought to you by cremains and the city of Indianapolis
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
A Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, reverent, and lead poisoned
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Eight 12- and 13-year-old boys charged with sexual assault of girls: "It's kids playing basketball. People touch people - it's not that they were groping the vagina or breasts or nothing."
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(294)
 
(Some Gal)
 
 
 
First grade teacher arrested for showing up to school drunk, as if there's any other way to handle being around dozens of screaming hairless monkeys day in and day out
source: wndu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Derby Evening Telegraph)
 
 
 
A burglar who stole more than £150,000 worth of nickel and copper was caught when his getaway truck's suspension collapsed under the weight of his haul
source: thisisderbyshire.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Woman told that she has to remove her bra before she can go to court
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Swedish tech guy demands equal rights after nightclub tells him that go-go cages are for women only. How can we ever achieve full gender equality if men are kept out of the cages?
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Here's why you won't be able to save your child from a Chinese toy death this Christmas
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Amazon group bans logging and mining, continues to allow Super Saver shipping
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Drew will be on Opie and Anthony XM 202 at 9am
source: foundrymusic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(191)
 
(WCCO.com)
 
 
 
Try our new energy bar before your next workout. You can really taste the buffalo meat and cranberries
source: wcco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hillary Clinton promises a science-friendly White House. And we know Bill enjoys the field of DNA forensics
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(455)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police shoot and kill a gunman who shot five people in a Louisiana law office, remind the public that lawyer season doesn't open for another three weeks
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Art teacher gets caught painting with his butt while wearing a Groucho Marx mask. What he was doing with a Groucho mask on his ass, we'll never know
source: dailypress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Some Tfette)
 
 
 
Photoshop this piggy-back ride
source: schnebeck.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Drew will be on Q104.3 New York City starting around 7:40am. Podcast available all day
source: q1043.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Irish Independent)
 
 
 
The Vatican has pledged to clean up Italian football after buying its own club. Wait, what?
source: independent.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Residents of gay retirement home fear there are too many straight people moving into their area, and that is NOT fabulous (pic)
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(147)
 
(WMUR)
 
 
 
Not news: Man grows marijuana plants. News: Gets busted by undercover state troopers. Fark: Alongside of I-89 in New Hampshire while watering said plants
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Some Big Toe)
 
 
 
News: Assistant principal has inappropriate contact with student. Fark: By sucking his big toe in exchange for good grades, money and hall passes
source: clarionledger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Britain's first extinction of the new millennia likely to be a beetle that was only discovered two years ago. Been nice knowing you, mate
source: environment.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
British people are stressed out and whiny and feel that living in the UK is tougher than an overcooked banger
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Some Hobo)
 
 
 
Give some physical graffiti to this box car. Special details in first post
source: elchode.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The Church of England does not want you to dress like a whore or a monster this Halloween
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Japanese policeman shot in butt with own gun while battling porn vending machine bandits
source: mdn.mainichi.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Man shoots himself seven times with a nail gun in attempt to defraud worker's compensation. The Sun is there with the X-rays
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Vatican set to reveal 700-year-old secret Knights Templar papers. Gentlemen, pull your tinfoil hats down to the takeoff position
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(189)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A confused moose thinks he's a cow. Will Rocky find him before he's shipped to the stockyard? Don't miss our next episode: "Milk of Amnesia" or "It's not just an udder day"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Brits in the US compare ban on clotted cream to the London Blitz. How did we win WWII again?
source: epicurious.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Floyd the barber gives Mayberry city council meeting a piece of his mind... literally
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
British railroads getting desperate to explain delays to passengers. They're now testing out "OMFG, there's a llama on the tracks"
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Nature-lovers with more money than brain cells go to Chernobyl to swim, fish, and forage for berries
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(ScienceDaily)
 
 
 
Study finds working during adolescence increases risk of smoking, working with adolescents increases risk of drinking
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
Politician putting together program that would pay kids hourly wage to stay in school and get good grades
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Remember bird flu? Remember how it's supposed to mutate to infect humans? It has. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(Doh!)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for having a stolen doughnut in the back of her pants
source: local.lancasteronline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Some beer thieves are content with running away with a 12-pack from 7-11. This guy had bigger dreams
source: edmontonsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
"Americans Against Hate" plans to protest Muslim Family Day at Six Flags
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Doctors call on smokers "to be treated the same as heroin addicts"
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 


Thu October 04, 2007
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman finds two years of her salary in the middle of the street. What does she do? Tag says it all
source: apnews.myway.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(225)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
It's official - slain pregnant woman in Deerfield, IL was girlfriend of '85 Bears Super Bowl team member Shaun Gayle
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
The IgNobel Prizes are out, and if you got vanilla scent out of cow pies, congratulations are in order. The "gay bomb" creators, well, you guys have issues... just saying
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Solar telescope lands on Texas farm. Yeah, that's it. A solar telescope. Move along, citizen (w/pic)
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Student Press Law Center)
 
 
 
Georgia high school publishes gay-bashing article with zingers like: "homosexuality is a medical disorder as much as Down's syndrome"
source: splc.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(552)
 
(Earth Times)
 
 
 
Two teens get suspended from school for wearing anti drunk driving t-shirts
source: earthtimes.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Drew's book "does more to advance the journalistic art" than a bunch of think tanks you've never heard of, writes amazed journalist
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this smiling puffer fish
source: groovy.movingtonz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(KNBC-4)
 
 
 
L.A. County Sheriff lifts policing tactics from "Reno 911" by holding contest to see which deputy could make the most arrests in a single shift
source: knbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Being a parent is now sufficient grounds for being suspected of drunken, drug-abusing child-farking criminal behavior
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(Some Ra Worshipper)
 
 
 
"How come nobody worries about the sun going out?" Bonus: Fark mention
source: thewvsr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
Jury finds for the recording industry in the first RIAA case to go to trial. Awards plantiffs $222,000. Suck it downloaders
source: blog.wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(624)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Judge tells Atlanta school districts that they may add duct tape to their existing methods of controlling unruly students
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Charleston Daily Mail)
 
 
 
After lockdown and K-9 search fails to turn up gun, boy still charged with bringing one to school because... uh... he must have done it if some other student said he did
source: dailymail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
"Woman declines $100 offer over can of beans containing rodent head"
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
♪ Hold tight, what's that supreme court justice doing? ♪ Hold tight, with that gas and matches? ♪ There's got to be a way to avoid foreclosure ♪ Burning down the house ♪
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
There's a church, a man with a sword, and it's in Florida. What else do you need?
source: tallahassee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
When you've been struck by lightning at a performance, needed surgery after a unicycle accident, temporarily blinded yourself with clown makeup, and suffered a hernia from a trick, maybe you're not cut out to be a magician
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(rense.com)
 
 
 
Tinfoil hat blogger predicts that "soon you'll have to ask permission before you fly"... and he may just be right
source: rense.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
"Radioactive Boy Scout" arrested for stealing smoke detectors whilst trying to construct a homemade nuclear reactor in his toolshed
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(WBBM 780)
 
NewsFlash
 
Pregnant woman shot to death in affluent Chicago suburb, neighboring middle school evacuated. Suspect - described as "a athletic looking, very handsome male" - still at large (updated link)
source: wbbm780.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(385)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
The top ten rudest workplace behaviors. Here's looking at you, smokers, cell phone users, and litterers
source: jhu.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(956)
 
(SanDiegoUnionTribune)
 
 
 
Border patrol agents to get new air guns that shoot pepper balls at illegal Mexican immigrants. Not sure whether that's to deter them or spice the burrito they brought for lunch
source: signonsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(WTNH)
 
 
 
News: Loose moose back on noose. Fark: Vehicle abuse the excuse for lethal force use
source: wtnh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Minnesota judge tells Senator Larry Craig (R-eally Really Not Gay) that he cannot change his stance
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(246)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Which country has the most contented citizens? That would be the one whose citizens contentedly keep sneaking over the border to the not-so-contented country to their north
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Apparently, the Italian police seem to think every grey-haired male American tourist is "Superkiller Americano"
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Newspaper photographer captures pics of fugitive jumping from 3rd story window, then captures the fugitive. J. Jonah Jameson is unimpressed
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(SuperDeluxe)
 
Video
 
How NOT to handle your first date with a porn star (possibly NSFW)
source: superdeluxe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The Dog of Peace™ strikes again
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(551)
 
(NY Times)
 
 
 
Old & busted: Student's grade suffers for not doing his or her assigned homework. New hotness: Student's grade suffers because parents didn't do "their" assigned homework. Wait? What?
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(382)
 
(NYTimes)
 
 
 
Today in History: Beep Beep Beep Beep Beeeeep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beeeeep. EVERYBODY PANICKED
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Some Congress)
 
 
 
US national debt ceiling quietly raised to $9.8 trillion (9.7 trillion Canadian)
source: thomas.loc.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(272)
 
(CBS3.com)
 
 
 
Random dude appoints himself Mayor of Atlantic City after current Mayor goes missing
source: cbs3.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Comedy Central)
 
Video
 
Who hasn't wished they had tourettes when they were 10?
source: southpark.comedycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(Duluth News Trib)
 
 
 
In the first file-sharing case to go to trial, the RIAA is seeking up to $3.6 million from a woman who says she never shared any of the 24 songs in question
source: duluthnewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(406)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Sixteen million dollars seized in Nigerian fraud investigation. Wait, the money was real?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Florida city considering a ban on anything made in China. Yeah, that'll wok
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Gift Rage - its like car rage only stranger
source: dailytelegraph.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
You get a C in class. Do you A) work harder B) complain to friends C) file a 15-count federal lawsuit, claiming the university violated your civil rights, contractual rights, and intentionally inflicted emotional distress?
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(322)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Union gets court order barring TV station from reporting that two dead firefighters praised as heroes were actually drunk and on drugs when they died. The Boston Globe, which is not a TV station, is there
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(228)
 
(11 Alive)
 
 
 
Stone Mountain, Georgia stops making snow after public outrage
source: 11alive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
When a rape suspect shows up at jail to turn himself in, should the jail: A) Take him into custody B) Ask him to stay while they wait for police or C) Tell him to go away because he doesn't have his ID with him
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
If you've been arrested in the US don't expect to be welcome in Canada regardless of the offense
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(305)
 
(Rocky Mountain News)
 
 
 
Begun the Holiday Wars have. First, the liberal haters attacked Christmas. In retaliation, Halloween has been renamed Fall Festival
source: rockymountainnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(260)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Drunk, cranked up, driving 115 mph, throwing beer cans, driving without a license, flipping off cops and getting tazed is no way to go through life, son
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The good news: more than 1700 miners have been rescued from the collapsed mine in South Africa. The bad news: there are about 1,500 still trapped
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
For the second year running, world travellers vote London's public transport the best in the world. Speaking as a Londoner, subby asks "what the hell are you people smoking?"
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this state-of-the-art dental chair
source: dentalez.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(K 2)
 
 
 
Craigslist Reverend performs marriage ceremony then takes gift cards meant for newlyweds, 'mistaking' them for a tip. With an "Oh Lord my eyes" mugshot and an "I'd hit it" pic of the bride
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Kraft recalls white chocolate, and not fondly, after buyers report that it gave them a case of the Hershey Squirts
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
Actual headline: Mr. Potato Head in Australia ecstasy bust (with pic)
source: afp.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
There was trouble, however, when the sherry hit the anus
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
Armed homeowner to burglar: "you're a dead man"
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(397)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Leapfrogging mayor injures woman dressed as tomato... uh, really
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Drunk man tried to recreate the boat-jumping bridge stunt from the movie "Live and Let Die", and well, he got the last part right
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Man gets criminal record for yelling "abusive and racist comments" - at his TV
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Delta Airlines requiring mother traveling with conjoined twins to buy two seats for them. But ask them for a second packet of peanuts and see how far that gets you
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
North and South Korea have signed a pact pledging to seek a permanent peace agreement
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Phil Spector to be retried for murder, seeks new lawyers. Must. Not. Use. Newsflash.
source: ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Olympic National Park to raise entrance fees from $15 per car to $25. Critics suggest "it would lead to where only the wealthier members of our society could come." Because the difference between being rich or not is only $10
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(700 Club)
 
 
 
"Did you ever wonder why Halloween seems to primarily feed off of a market of 3-13 year olds? This is a Satanic ploy for our children."
source: cbn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(397)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 126: "Tourist in Your Own Town" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(253)
 


Wed October 03, 2007
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Vegetable popular in World War II is making a comeback, more super and more superior than ever before. No, this is not about Captain America
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
"I asked Jesus what in the world I had done to deserve this." Might have something to do with shooting fish with a bow
source: news-record.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(NWF Daily News)
 
 
 
Community church disappointed it will be only local congregation to celebrate upcoming National Porn Sunday
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Santa Rosa Press Democrat)
 
 
 
Police officer assumes teen in sports car must be speeding, writes ticket for 17 over the limit. GPS in car proves otherwise
source: www1.pressdemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(236)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Child porn suspect has been in the PMITA jail for too long gets released because of severe flatulence and "groin numbness." Florida tags trumps them all
source: tboblogs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Operation "Dutch Oven" is a success. The postal service prevents the elderly, senile, lonely, disabled and stupid from handing over their lifesavings to the Nigerians
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Weird: Chico the cat describes the life of his "best friend," Pope Benedict. Fark: biography is authorized by the Vatican
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Amsterdam's famed coffee shops are turning to free-range eggs for their hashish "spacecakes" to reduce the suffering of chickens. Dude... what?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(AnimalRights.net)
 
 
 
Quotes from animal rights activists: "The life of an ant and that of my child should be granted equal consideration."
source: animalrights.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(456)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Court refuses to stay open till 5:20 to allow for computer malfunction, so inmate dies at 8:23 by lethal injection. Where the hell is the Texas tag on this thing for those "relish for death" articles?
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(283)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this handsome mushroom
source: pilzepilze.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Police investigating burglary report theft of computers and £10,000 worth of Star Wars action figures. Thought it was quiet around here
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(WBNS 10tv)
 
 
 
73-year-old man attacked while trying to enjoy a cup of coffee, opens a can of whoop ass in the form of Karate and Judo. "Nobody comes into my house without my permission" (w/lawn off NOW photo)
source: 10tv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Number of Americans who see themselves among the "have-nots" of society has doubled over the past two decades. Losers
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(500)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Drew needs a theme song. What should it be? (link goes to subby's choice) VE
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(252)
 
(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)
 
 
 
Taking a bold step into the previous century, Pennsylvania may allow beer stores to actually sell you a six-pack
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Tiny dog unearths two-million-year old mammoth bone that's bigger than it is, but still wants steak (with pic of pooch that's worth the click alone)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
♫ Working in a gold mine / Mile underground now / Working in a gold mine / Oops, we're gonna drown now ♪ Working in a gold mine / Hundred sixty score now / Working in a gold mine / Oops, we're gonna drown now ♫
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Protester arrested for mooning the police; routine DNA sample ties him to unsolved rape case. "Dumbass" tag was never more applicable
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Newspapers urged to write at a level readers can understand, point to Lexington, Ky. as a model, where stories on state's poor education system have to be written at a Grade 3 level so residents can understand them
source: thebellwetherdaily.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
The kid might be right. Maybe it is about free speech. But he's still a dumbass
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(384)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
And there in Oak Lawn, some people say, the school boards' heart grew three sizes that day
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
'
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(511)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
50 years after Allen Ginsburg's landmark poem "Howl" was declared not legally obscene, radio stations refuse to air it, fearing FCC sanctions. Freedom costs a buck oh five
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 
(Some Gal)
 
 
 
Theme: Seven deadly sins. Today's sin: ENVY
source: n8w.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(ICNetwork)
 
 
 
Driver in 100-mph "suicide bid" told by judge: "The next time you want to commit suicide, find somewhere quiet to do it"
source: gazettelive.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Jesuslanders and Libtardians holding second secessionist convention. The loser gets Florida
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(339)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
If you have a phobia about spiders -- especially 30-foot-high ones -- stay the hell out of London. And don't click on the link either, because there's a pic
source: uk.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
♪ Slip sliding away | Slip sliding away | You know the dearer your lovely house is | The more it's slip sliding away ♪
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Property owner halted from cutting down Anne Frank's favorite tree. You know who else didn't like Anne Frank's tree?
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(344)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Bush might consider making the trip if Iran was a free and democratic society. And allowed its people freedom of expression. And if it was not pursuing nuclear weapons. And if it thinks of a number between one and 100
source: voanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Wal-Mart workers win $62 million. Smiley face guy observed adding ten cents to the price of t-shirts made in China
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Police warn of "gorillas" attacking at ATMs
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(CBN)
 
 
 
Poll of tattooed Americans reveal that 33% think their tattoos make them more sexy, 25% feel rebellious and 20% feel more spiritual
source: cbn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(636)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Woman told she has breast cancer, has a double mastectomy, later told she never had cancer. Someone's getting sued
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man confesses to high school prank he pulled in 1957, gives school a check for $500 to make amends for "dastardly deed" of dumping two years' worth of pop cans into school swimming pool in 1957 (pic)
source: paloaltodailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Comedy Central)
 
 
 
"I had peach fuzz and her vagina looked like Cat Stevens' face" (Sponsored Link)
source: sarahsilverman.comedycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Former President Carter gets in a fight with Sudanese security officials on his way to a peace conference
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Some Healthy Hos)
 
 
 
Strip club offes free flu shots. Penicillin for lap dances may require a fee
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Do not bring your baby carriages to Grünerløkka unless you want to be assaulted by a naked woman
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Eyewitness News)
 
 
 
ACROSS 7. People who annoy you
source: myeyewitnessnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(209)
 
(CentreDaily)
 
 
 
Motivational speaker apparently wasn't motivated enough to remove his kiddie porn collection from his laptop before dropping it off for repairs
source: centredaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Chicago Breaking News)
 
 
 
Woman shoots and kills her boyfriend after discovering his porn stash. With "Hell, I'd be stockpiling porn too if I was tagging her, she looks like Denny Green in a wig" mugshot goodness
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Boston mayor asks bars to be careful who they serve during Red Sox playoff games because it's embarrassing and expensive when police spray bullets into unruly crowds
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Aliens forced Americans out from the Moon
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If you left a folder full of nude pictures on a state representative's thumb drive prior to his lecture at a high school, the state highway patrol would like to have a word with you
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
More young black men are in prison than in college, presidential candidates say. Sounds too juicy to check, but someone did. Turns out five times as many are in college as are in prison
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(370)
 
(WHNT19)
 
 
 
Today's "eight bags of cocaine burst in prisoner's stomach" story brought to you by Huntsville, Alabama. Take that, Florida
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(32)
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Actual headline: "Can a nun cure Alzheimers?" Article's answer: "No"
source: news.scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Danny Bonaduce beats up Johnny Fairplay on stage. With slideshow and audio
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Charleston Gazette)
 
 
 
After decades of ranking 50th in everything, West Virginia finally gets a No. 1
source: wvgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Philadelphia School District wastes $700K on a study designed to improve accounting practices and efficiency. Bonus: Study went unread because officials lost the report
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
New AG nominee unlikely to order the draping of naked statues, as client list includes New York tabloids and a dial-up-porn service
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Bush vetoes No Sick Child Left Behind
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(812)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Even though the state is experiencing an extreme drought, Coca-Cola is going to waste 1.2 millions gallons of water making snow in Georgia in October
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
You are driving drunk when a cop attempts to pull you over. Do you: A) Pull over and admit your stupidity? B) Try to pull off the sober act? Or C) Gun it and try to outrun the S.O.B.... on your riding lawn mower?
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Federal employees wasted at least $146 million over a one-year period on first-class air travel because they "felt entitled to the perk"
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
New baby-murdering facility opens in Chicago, hopes to nudge 1.37 million annual child murders to an even 1.4
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(910)
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
The study we've all been waiting for: booze makes you clever
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
The owner of the impound lot where University of Florida team captain was busted for stealing his gf's car says he should not be charged with any crime, because he was just growing "impatient" waiting for someone to check him out
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(WYFF4.com)
 
 
 
You're a teenage girl driving a car. Is this a good time to: A) Pay attention to the road? B) Talk on your cell phone? Or C) Huff keyboard cleaner? (With pic)
source: wyff4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(123)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
The definition of "forgiveness" stretched just a tad after priest plays parishiner's private voicemail message in church, then asking, "Should we send him to hell or to another parish?"
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Stop me if you've heard this one before: N. Korea vows to shut down its nuclear program
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Police officer who accidentally shot himself rushed to Albert Einstein Medical Center, presumably because Barney Fife Hospital was too far away
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
According to Senator Lindsey Graham, the war will magically pay for itself when we win it
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Nothing says "suck it" more than a presidential veto on kid's health care programs
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(644)
 
(Common Ground)
 
 
 
Theoretical physicist frustrated that every time there's a breakthough in string theory, his Hare Krishna brother brags that it was already documented in his religious books centuries ago
source: commongroundmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Class-action lawsuit brought by blind people against Target's website. Blind-people-biatching trifecta now in play
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Comedy Central)
 
Video
 
Jon Stewart savages Chris Matthews during the book interview from hell
source: comedycentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(183)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Bad: Toy recall due to lead paint. Good: Toy company sends bonus toys as apology. Fark: Bonus toys now being recalled due to lead paint
source: ap.google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Network World)
 
 
 
The best of Harvard's Ig Nobel Prize winners for real but weird science
source: networkworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(The Keynoter)
 
 
 
Department of Agriculture declares victory over rats on rat island. Not that rat island, the other one. Not that other one, but the one down in Florida. Which is the opposite of Alaska. And the Iraq
source: keynoter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Driver who called police while driving and taunted them with "I'm hammered... come get me" before being captured and tasered now says he was suffering from a mental breakdown
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(IOL.co.za)
 
 
 
Judge agrees with man that wife's threats to amputate his penis are satisfactory grounds for divorce, chainmail underpants
source: iol.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
New "Denver boot" introduced that can be unlocked by drivers after they pay their fine. Denver sure that these will be promptly returned, instead of say, re-attached to other cars as a practical joke
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(London Times)
 
 
 
You know it's a good chili when hazmat teams seal off your street
source: timesonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
"My motto has been they are going to have to pry this vibrator from my cold, dead hand"
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(149)
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
When driving a stolen car, you might want to hold off on driving to the county jail to visit your boyfriend (with it's-a-man-baby pic goodness)
source: komotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Blind people speak out against the danger of quieter (hybrid) automobiles. Also concerned about rearranged furniture, plungers left in toilets
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Head of the Office of National Drug Control Policy claims success in war on drugs. No, he was not stoned at the time
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Christianity's biggest problem? It's not sexy enough
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(460)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
If you're sitting in the gallery of a courtroom during a trial, please turn off your cell phone's loud, orgasmic "Oh, yeah ... yeah ... oh, yeah ... do it to me" ringtone beforehand
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this log cabin on the move
source: bean.plasmator.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Naked guy breaks into Nic Cage's home, puts on leather jacket. Says it was a symbol of his individuality and his belief in personal freedom
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Forest fires in the West becoming so much hotter and so much faster that fire chiefs increasingly saying "fark it" and letting the houses of people stupid enough to build there burn rather than risking lives fighting for it
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
An electronic tag from a three-inch-long steelhead trout that was released from a Washington State hatchery in 2005 was found two years later... in the belly of a bird, 7,700 miles away, off the coast of New Zealand
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Steve Fossett, whose condition was initially ''maybe alive," then upgraded to "maybe not dead" now downgraded to "probably working his way through the lower intestine of a coyote"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Brampton Guardian)
 
 
 
Police issue public safety warning about ex-convict, citing "a significant safety risk." But they can't say why. Odd, he seems normal in the mugshot
source: northpeel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Cops fire a dozen times at aggressive rottweiler and miss every shot. Your dog immediately starts an argument about divine intervention. And hamburgers
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Rural homeless rate found to be twice urban rate. Presumably they're all out enjoying nature's blessings, just like hippies on Earth Day
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(10News.com)
 
 
 
Man who bought box of GooGoo Clusters candy from 99-cent store learns "GooGoo" is apparently slang for maggot
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(56)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man sets his house on fire trying to kill yellow jackets
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Alabama couple celebrates 80th wedding anniversary. He's 97, she's 94. You do the math. Ah, sweet home Alabama
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Homeless man stays warm by setting another homeless man on fire
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
In case you've stopped panicking about bird flu, Swedish scientist says Tamiflu vaccine may help spawn an uber-resistant strain. EVERYONE PANIC - AGAIN
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 


Tue October 02, 2007
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
From the county that brought you the high school student who married her former coach, comes the school board that considered hiring a teacher, who had sex with a student, to teach schools' sexual harassment training. With pic
source: wilmingtonstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
22-year-old woman accused of having sex with 15-year-old Boy Scout on sailing trip. Her job title: first mate
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Man makes a 6-year-old guzzle a can of beer. Before you ask where the 'cool' and 'hero' tags are, you should know the beer was a Coors Light
source: www2.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Blackwater pilot to his co-pilot while taking a low-level run through a mountain canyon in Afghanistan, moments before their fatal crash: "I swear to God, they wouldn't pay me if they knew how much fun this was."
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Fans pissed off at scalpers snagging all the tickets and driving up prices respond by sabotaging their online auctions
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Big-time gambler who owes casino £2 million decides he can pay his debt one night by winning big at the tables. Hilarity? It was not in the odds
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Not news: man loses his home to creditors. News: they seize everything he owns while he's in the hospital. Fark: including his wife's ashes
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
U.S. to admit 12,000 Iraqi refugees next year, presumably if it can find that many civilians it and Blackwater haven't killed by then
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(229)
 
(KPHO)
 
 
 
"We stopped the show because we feel that this was inappropriate and not a kind of performance that we want them to see."
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(160)
 
(WCBStv.com)
 
 
 
Middle school teachers tell students to create a catchy ad for plantations and slave labor. What could possibly go wrong?
source: wcbstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
"The establishment of a new constitution -- generally considered one of the most liberal in the world -- unleashed a torrent of hard-core porn"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(CBS13.com - CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
From the appendix to the tailbone, here's a list of body parts that we could all do without
source: cbs13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(273)
 
(WBZTV)
 
 
 
Tom Brady, adverse to bad karma, removed the in-flight movie while the Patriots were en route to Cincinnati after discovering that it co-starred his ex-girlfriend
source: wbztv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
When placing a story on their website about female athletes bearing the brunt of concussions, ABC News goes for the gold in photo perfection
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
"The head of the Nazis was a killer named Hitler whose evil partner, Mussolini, was president of the USSR. The war ended with the bombing of Iwo Jima and Hitler's suicide. Then a treaty was signed." Ken Burns sighs
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(518)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Steal grandmas pork chop - that's a stabbing. Bonus farktacular quote - "Eat my pork, feel my fork"
source: tinyurl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(WFAA.com)
 
 
 
100-year anniversary Neiman Marcus Christmas catalog issue includes $1.4 million personal submarine, and a robot that can carry on a conversation for $75,000. Submitter was surprised that Larry King's booking fee was that low
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption this career fair conversation
source: img408.imageshack.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(KCTV)
 
 
 
Running around a church half naked and smoking crack? Yep, that's a tasering
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Man returns home from night of heavy drinking, discovers his key no longer works. Doing what any Farker would do, he breaks in and mixes himself another drink. Rightful owner of house returns, jailarity ensues
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
O.J. Simpson ordered by court to give his Rolex to Ron Goldman, vows to keep that uncomfortable hunk of metal up his ass for years rather than comply
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
For some reason, the Iowa State Fair board is looking into banning the "erotic corndog eating" competition
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Crimson White)
 
 
 
University of Alabama offers class on "The Gospel of Star Wars." Students required to write dissertation on why Han shot first
source: media.www.cw.ua.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Research lab fined $15,000 for spanking the monkey
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Target recalls toy rattles, a time when toys were made in the U.S.
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(First Coast News)
 
 
 
Good news for LSU fans: The defensive captain for the Florida Gators is in jail for trying to break into an impound lot to get his girlfriend's car
source: firstcoastnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(KJRH)
 
 
 
Wal-Mart will gladly match any competitor's price, unless it's another local Wal-Mart
source: kjrh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
The new TV season is only a week old and no one is watching
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(326)
 
(The Cannabist)
 
 
 
"Lost" producers ask fans to "trust them" in the fourth season. Because they have been so forthcoming up until this point with answers
source: ifmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(201)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Man tries to rob a bank, flees after the teller offers him suckers as an alternative
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
First it was a grim reaper cat. Now it's a dog that knows when you're gonna die. Next up, a parrot that tells people, "Polly want a corpse"
source: nbc10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Iranian university invites Bush to speak following Iranian president's visit to Columbia University. "After all, it is only fair that we show the same diplomacy to your fascist leader as you did to ours"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(216)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
High carb dieters slimmer, more healthy. Pass the beer
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(185)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Sheriff says that if a bank-robbing couple surrender, he'll marry them while they're in jail
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Bush 33, Congress 29. It's not golf, people -- you want a higher score
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(335)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man paints marriage proposal on his demolition derby car. Pinky Tuscadero's Ironic tag escapes Malachi Crunch of Obvious and Dumbass
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Asshat steals 82-year-old's tree carving from his yard. Police stumped
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Dlisted)
 
 
 
You would think that after $500,000 of nip/tuck, Demi Moore would look better than this. (PIC)
source: dlisted.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(219)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Old-fashioned blocks beat Mozart, baby DVDs, even flash cards in helping make toddlers smarter. They're also good in helping a toddler's younger sibling develop good reflexes to get away from said block-throwing toddler
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(QuickDFW)
 
 
 
"Ass chewing leads to fight." Editors rejoice, censors cringe
source: quickdfw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Blackwater chief faces House panel concerning the murder of Iraqi civillians. Uses the "Your guys killed over 800 civilians last month. Why aren't they here being questioned?" defense
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(318)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Ford sales down a mere 39 percent from last year. Top sales analyst considers this good news
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(Network World)
 
 
 
AT&T swears it's not angling to pull the plug on its 'Net critics. Of course, who can believe those evil bas
source: networkworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Metro.co.uk)
 
 
 
Buddha's comically shaped penis now directed inward on the path to enlightenment. (Possibly not safe for work due to pic of banana-penised statue)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Hurricane "expert" William Gray desperately backs and fills, now calling for two hurricanes instead of five in next two months, adding plaintive "...please?"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Aint-It-Cool-News)
 
 
 
The day has finally arrived: ABC's "Cavemen" premieres tonight
source: aintitcool.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(485)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
The U.S. Air Force is going to get 10 new C-17s at a cool $2.4 billion. The funny thing is, they told Congress they didn't want them
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
News: Baby found in the back seat of a car. Fark: Her parents were in the front seat, passed out (with mugshots)
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(The IDF)
 
 
 
Israel: "Yeah, okay, we bombed you Syria. What the fark are you going to do about it? STFU and GBTW"
source: ynetnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(546)
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
Woman says she won a $60 million lottery because of the lucky blue dot she purchased from an ad in the National Enquirer
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
College students recreate "Jena 6" assault in blackface and, yes, they put it on Facebook
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Police find 140 parking meters, 50 hard-boiled eggs in man's home
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Everything you wanted to know about gynecology, but were afraid to probe
source: msnbc.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 
(Some Gal)
 
 
 
Theme: Seven deadly sins. Today's sin: GLUTTONY
source: strychnin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Raleigh N&O)
 
 
 
Apparently the N.C. Division of Motor Vehicles is part of a global conspiracy to create a North American Union
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(95)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Prosecutor drops charges against Good Samaritan who had the nerve to want to call her babysitter and say she'd be late so she could help translate for police
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(162)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Mayor Bloomberg says only "ridiculous people" object to having their movements constantly tracked and taxed
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(247)
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
Study shows crazy young people become crazy old people
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(48)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Ever wish you could live at the mall? This guy did, and set up a secret apartment in a parking garage there. Of course, the mall wasn't too happy when they discovered it. Four years later
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(167)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Isiah Thomas found guilty in sexual harassment trial, MSG also required to pay punitive damages. Knicks fans hope this means he'll be fired, then remember who owns this team
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(98)
 
(Derby Evening Telegraph)
 
 
 
Smoker's fury as she is fined £40 for dropping cigarette end down drain
source: thisisderbyshire.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(235)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
James Randi Foundation offers $1 million for proof that audiophile quality $7000 speaker cables better than ordinary cables
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(484)
 
(Chron)