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These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.
Sun June 15, 2003
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Photoshop an ad for McDonald's new "I'm Loving It" campaign
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
NewsFlash
 
San Antonio Rockets defeat New Jersey Knicks to win NFL Championship
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
To get away with taking nudie pics of kids, you have to be acclaimed world-renowned artist. Being a part-time Domino's Pizza employee doesn't cut it
source: news.mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Guy wearing deep-sea diving suit sets world record for slowest marathon time: Six days, four hours, 30 minutes and 56 seconds
source: theaustralian.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu Advertiser)
 
 
 
If you miss the garbage truck, run ahead of it and put it in your neighbor's trash can
source: the.honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(X-Entertainment)
 
 
 
Strange but true: Cartoon show based on the Rubik's Cube
source: x-entertainment.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Janesville Gazette)
 
 
 
Orfordville, WI needs street names for its industrial park; any ideas? (with voting)
source: gazetteextra.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IV Press Online)
 
 
 
Language barrier prevents rescue of man from underground water tank. "Help. Get me out of here." in Spanish sounds a lot like "Nothing to see here. Move along"
source: ivpressonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Head of hospital is charged with illegally charging an arm and a leg for, well, an arm and a leg
source: mdn.mainichi.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Arguing over the Special Olympics is like running in the Special Olympics..
source: sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DING!!!!)
 
 
 
Carnie mistakes co-worker for test of strength
source: nbc5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OCRegister)
 
 
 
Tokyo opens its first naked bathhouse theme park. "Space Mountain" ride renamed "Elderly sagging titty"
source: www2.ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
FBI agents looking for drugs find Academy Award. Michael Moore still an asshat
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(people.co.uk)
 
 
 
It's not often you hear about an in-flight helicopter riot, but here you go
source: people.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop the cover of the new Harry Potter book
source: us.news1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
Hubble Space Telescope captures the brightest star in our galaxy (with pics)
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Mormon crickets make the streets flow with the blood of the non-believers
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Farmer cuts off fingers to save self; he was hallucinating about a barbecue
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Tribune)
 
 
 
Father's Day doesn't mean much when you're a prison bitch
source: tampatrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Astronomer)
 
 
 
Noctilucent Clouds
source: antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
In honor of Father's Day, Top 10 bad big-screen dads. Heeeeeeere's Daddy
source: entertainment.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Patricia Velasquez gallery --- mostly SFW
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Happy Fathers' Day to Farkers' dads, Farkers who are dads, and Fb- (link goes to Fark)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Catnip may help control termites. Insert "pussy" and "wood" jokes here
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
What a pisser. Man is shot dead after parking on top of a septic tank
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Coca-Cola planning root-beer float in a can. Giant-penis float in a can not far off
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop President Bush in front of Marine One
source: us.news1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(retroCrush)
 
 
 
A look at the great TV Dads in history
source: retrocrush.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Terra Lycos Network)
 
Boobies
 
Brazilian hotness Barbara Koboldt. SFW at first, progresses smoothly into NSFW goodness
source: terra.com.br
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Hobbit currency to become legal in New Zealand
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Tony Roma dead at 78. Meat maker meets maker
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Consumer Reports)
 
 
 
Seek medical attention if you get poison ivy on your groin. Also, seek psychiatric attention if you feel compelled toward botanical frottage
source: consumerreports.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Injunction granted against SpikeTV after judge falls into the black hole that is Spike Lee's ego
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Honor student to be jailed for robbing McDonald's
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Kid bites teacher -- teacher bites kid. Parents glad kid didn't soil himself
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Houston Chronicle)
 
 
 
Your meat may contain factory worker
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat June 14, 2003
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Man's attempt to urinate out the window of a moving car thwarted by Darwin
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Science Blog)
 
 
 
Scientists conclude even heterosexual women find lesbians hot
source: scienceblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Scientists study mummies to learn secrets of tuberculosis, Joan Rivers
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fourteen arrests in school water-balloon fracas
source: app.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Soiled dildos often returned to companies after several uses
source: mdn.mainichi.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Hatfields and McCoys officially end their feud
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Galveston County Daily News)
 
 
 
Giant-penis float draws complaints. "Fifty gallons of root beer and two scoops giant penis" jokes ensue
source: galvnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Seniors get their money back from crappy fourth-grade investment
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Bhutan finally got its first TV four years ago, is now racked by crime and obesity
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(klastv)
 
 
 
Dog named "Blaze" saves family from house fire
source: klastv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Amish man is jailed for dealing drugs. WTF?
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contra Costa Times)
 
 
 
Famous bra fitter's cup is empty at 94. Farkers mob employment office.
source: bayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Every funeral at Waffle House comes with bottomless cup of coffee
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(retroCrush)
 
 
 
"Step right up and win a prize." How to win at carnival games
source: retrocrush.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deepika Kerala News)
 
 
 
Girl with four eyes, two mouths and two noses born in Nepal.
source: deepikaglobal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nettavisen)
 
 
 
Restaurant 'recycled' soft drinks and rice
source: nettavisen.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Woman can't stand labor pains, jumps into well. And then successfully gives birth. Fb- the amazed father
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoples Daily)
 
 
 
From the department of things we already forgot about: SARS travel warning for China dropped
source: english.peopledaily.com.cn   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Comedian kids try out firecracker routine at police station. Cops prove to be tough crowd
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jacksonville.com)
 
 
 
Two people try sushi for the first time. Hilarity ensues. Suprisingly long
source: jacksonville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hanging Ford banner on a building
source: us.news1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Woman who reported finding Columbia audio cassette admits it was all a hoax
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yoni)
 
Weeners
 
Lingam Gnosis: The ancient art of penis reading (not safe for work)
source: backdoor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
A new way to kill sharks, just jump in the water naked
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
Roswell declassified. The truth is not out there
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
People who believe in bad luck more likely to have bad luck
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Naked man scales fence and scurries around at La Guardia Airport
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TheStatesman.com)
 
 
 
Website of Calcutta Police has become a Canadian pornographic site (w/links, article safe for work)
source: thestatesman.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Government deploys highly-trained "sentinel chickens" to track West Nile virus. If you see them, don't eat them
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Straight Dope)
 
 
 
Do womens' periods really sync up with each other?
source: straightdope.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
JK Rowling, Harry Potter author, could become the first author billionaire
source: thescotsman.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Engineer drowns in vat of hot paint. Always claimed he was primed for his brush with death
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Australian)
 
 
 
I saw an extinct turtle. And it breathes through its ass
source: theaustralian.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
1940's ordinance requires Sheriff to auction off unclaimed goat on county courthouse steps
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Atlanta Farkers won't get to see the Maxim's Hottest 100 TV special because "It's not consistent with NBC's emphasis on quality programming."
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Burglar who says he cannot enjoy sex after he was shot robbing home is given the right to sue for damages
source: sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MaineToday.com)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for grand theft puppy
source: centralmaine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(theage.com)
 
 
 
Everything you never wanted to know about old people sex (w/ incredibly disturbing pic)
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Where in the world is Tariq Aziz?
source: thescotsman.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rapture Index)
 
 
 
Rapture Index falls 2 points. We're now less likely than before to bring about apocalypse and second coming of Jebus
source: raptureme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
British riddled with the VD
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Sperm bank which accepts only highly educated donors finding only wack jobs and jerk-offs
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
The Texas "No Call" list is about as useful as a posted speed limit sign
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ICNetwork)
 
 
 
Vicar supports explicit sex teaching
source: icsouthlondon.icnetwork.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
New digital x-ray machine revolutionizing medicine
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Archaeologists learning more about what America's first president did after he left office by excavating George Washington's distillery
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Chinese chef upset that Viagra is overtaking his sales of snake penises
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this wedding veil monstrosity
source: a1676.g.akamaitech.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
England rugby team beat the mighty All Blacks
source: foxsports.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Photoshop what Jason Kidd is reacting too
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(X-Entertainment)
 
 
 
Want to make Monopoly games really annoying and difficult? Try the 1982 Parker Brothers Playmaster
source: x-entertainment.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
Ben Affleck says J-Lo's a virtual virgin: "She has been with just five guys in her whole life," Ben claims. (link died)
source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri June 13, 2003
(ArabNews)
 
 
 
The illusion of "another Vietnam"
source: arabnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FHM (US))
 
 
 
Halle Berry named "Sexiest Woman in the World" by FHM
source: fhmus.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Roger Clemens gets 300th win, 4,000th strikeout. Also has record for most legitimate kids for an athlete
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
Being fat can make you go blind
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Morgan Fairchild still a hottie. Denies rumor that she is undead
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
 
 
Space-station crew spots UFO
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(mlive.com)
 
 
 
Woman who impaled herself on mic stand will be okay, deliver child on expected due date. After birth, plans duet career and variety show
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Employees turn Waffle House into memorial for regular customer who died. Ashes were scattered, smothered, and covered in favorite parking spot
source: customwire.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Man spends 30 years trying to get a cop to kill him, can finally mark that off his "to do" list
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Albania starts a donkey-taxi service. If you like the ass, you gotta tip it
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Coke employee fired for drinking Pepsi on the job
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Communities shave time off yellow lights to increase ticket revenue
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cambridge Reporter)
 
 
 
Morons turn out in droves on full-moon Friday the 13th
source: cambridge-reporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(610wtvn)
 
Video
 
Columbus, Ohio CBS affiliate interrupts local family programming last night to bring you local news anchor Angela Pace flipping you the bird
source: 610wtvn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RDAnderson.com)
 
Weeners
 
SFW Richard Dean Anderson SG gallery
source: rdanderson.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OOps Celebs!)
 
Boobies
 
Stargate SG1s Amanda Tapping (not safe for work)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop Edgar the Bear, master of attacking at worst possible moments
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BrokenNewz)
 
 
 
Fox grabs exclusive broadcast rights to next four wars
source: brokennewz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Republican Senate candidate who accused his opponent of being soft on child molestation gets 37 years for child molestation
source: ap.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Kids who snore do worse in school. Kids who sleep during school don't do that well in the first place
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Worth1000)
 
 
 
Worth1000 needs $4000 to stay open to the public (Link goes to current contest.)
source: worth1000.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Farker Badger and wife are making first trip to Las Vegas for 10th anniversary. Need suggestions for cheap (free) "must see" attractions (with voting)
source: bigempire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Chuck Woolery and his unnaturally large head get reality series
source: accessatlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Dwarves rise to the occasion: Ban fails to pass
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Man fishing in France nets 66 pounds of weed. Explains recent rash of fish who don't care when they get caught
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Sewage main bursts, covering New Jersey neighborhood in feces. Property values skyrocket
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Metallica upset its music being used as a WMD in Iraq
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guys)
 
Video
 
Halo 2 video out from the fine folks at Bungie.net
source: bungie.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Olsen twins turn 17 today
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Norwegian state broadcasting to help in fight against dangerous boobies and big red penises with feet
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
William Jefferson Clinton, mayor of New York City
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Turns out that the funding given to the Iraq war was more than enough to pull off the job
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Spammers attempting to destroy the Internet
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Photoshop William Bastone, editor of The Smoking Gun. Fark takes no responsibility for contest participants ending up as future TSG stories
source: i.cnn.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Paralympics)
 
 
 
Iranians chanting "Death to the Ayatollah" in street demonstrations
source: sunspot.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Tell us about the songs that you can't stand to hear anymore
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Calista Flockhart says Harrison Ford definitely not handsome in the morning
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Greenwich Time)
 
 
 
A brief history of Friday the 13th
source: greenwichtime.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yes, I'm proposing on Fark)
 
 
 
Farker NullZoid wants his lurker girlfriend Monique to marry him. Will she realize it's a trap?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Britain declared "nation of alcoholics." Irish promise to get their title back in rematch
source: sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
President Bush has trouble riding the Segway
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
National security adviser sees hope in Mideast despite violence. That echo you hear is the sound of the same thing being said throughout history
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby elephant born with ugly-ass hairdo. Takes the label "ugly ass" to new heights
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
If you're going to saw off your wife's head and stuff it in a suitcase, make sure your phone number isn't inside the suitcase
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
Boobies
 
Sexy Swedish girl Marie (99-percent SFW)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Anonymous caller claims she has missing shuttle tape
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sydney Morning Herald)
 
 
 
Woman shoots husband after argument over who should feed the goats
source: smh.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Proposed bill would let spamees sue spammers
source: news.com.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Various Collectors)
 
Boobies
 
Jennifer Connelly, sexy star of The Hulk, bares all in this gallery. Banner, sidebar ads, some thumbnails on page NSFW
source: celebdaily.com
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hugh Jackman at the Tony Awards
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(InternetNews.com)
 
 
 
Supreme Court returns sex.com to the original owner
source: internetnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
NYC Fark Party, July 25-27. Be there or be square
source: novotny.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Ft. Worth, Texas Fark Party, June 21st.
source: terron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zap2It)
 
 
 
TNN's name change to Spike TV (temporarily) stopped by Spike Lee
source: tv.zap2it.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Getting into indie rock usually requires getting into Winona Ryder
source: ncbuy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mr. Cranky)
 
 
 
"Meet buddy cops Joe (Harrison Ford) and K.C. (Josh Hartnett). Oh, wait, you already have, at least a thousand times"
source: mrcranky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Emperor Hirohito considered making personal apology for World War II
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Forty percent of Americans iron while naked
source: ncbuy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Farker Manifest finishes first on tonight's Amazing Race, comments on how the Viennese sewers smell "like ass"
source: cbs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu June 12, 2003
(Lileks.com)
 
 
 
"I haven't written much about the 'Roadmap to Peace' for the same reason I wouldn't write much about attempts to crossbreed a llama with a vacuum cleaner: I don't think it's going to work."
source: lileks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these classy Cock fans reminding everyone who's Numero Uno
source: gamecocknation.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ComputerWorld)
 
 
 
Eighty percent of cybercrime incidents in the financial sector go unreported. They admit however, that there is no actual data to support this statistic
source: computerworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Teenirc.net)
 
 
 
A student created a fake airline and made mad money
source: teenirc.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCCI)
 
 
 
Small Iowa school offering online school enrollment for K-7
source: theiowachannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCCI)
 
 
 
Mark your calendars: First annual Mystic Goat Race scheduled for July 5th
source: theiowachannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Man shoots bear in ass -- claims bear was after his sweet, sweet pork chops
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hoosier Times)
 
 
 
Police investigating fourth incident of man furiously masturbating in his garage, beckoning neighbors to join him
source: hoosiertimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bergen Record)
 
 
 
Woodpecker has a woody for side-view mirrors on parked cars (with pic)
source: bergenrecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Most no-hitters thrown by crappy pitchers
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Willamette Week)
 
 
 
Couple buys house next to golf course. Hires lawyer when golf balls land in yard
source: wweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Things to do whilst waiting for the Northern Ireland football team to score
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
College courses foreshadow tech comeback. Because colleges so accurately reflect real life
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsMax)
 
 
 
NY Times' "man on the street" is the same guy for every story
source: newsmax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Topless darts make TV comeback
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Marine says he's still in love with wife who arranged to have him killed in a grenade attack
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Woman stunned when she finds old lottery ticket worth $3.8 million buried in her purse
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Dwarf Tossing Ban Act debated in Canada's parliament
source: globeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNSNews)
 
 
 
American Psychiatric Association debates lifting pedophilia taboo
source: cnsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
Homer Simpson voted best American of all time, ahead of Thomas Jefferson and Abraham Lincoln
source: thescotsman.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Man pleads guilty to driving without a license since 1984, drives away, gets 37th trip back to jail
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
J-Lo and Ben Affleck have to reshoot scenes for new movie because test audiences felt no sexual chemistry
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Government may replenish rare $2 bills
source: ap.tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Vodaphone agrees not to fire its CEO by text message or e-mail
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Britney to get boobs that throb
source: sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sports by Brooks)
 
 
 
Astros second baseman Jeff Kent didn't know about no-hitter against Yankees until game was over
source: sportsbybrooks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(retroCrush)
 
Boobies
 
Nine galleries featuring every Charlie's Angels actress (not safe for work)
source: retrospice.com
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Tiger Woods' outfits picked out more than a year in advance. Not surprisingly, all items say "Nike" on them
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
Baseball players developed world's most sophisticated language based on ball-scratching
source: ncbuy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Angryworld.com)
 
 
 
Bush offers Middle East factions a new roadmap to the "back of my hand" (NSFW)
source: angryworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Telemarketer to family: "Yeah, did you understand that? (Expletive) hanging up on somebody like that again. (Expletive) I'm coming in your (expletive) house, you (expletive). What the (expletive) you gonna do? I'll (expletive) kill you"
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zap2it)
 
 
 
How does the Hulk keep his pants on?
source: zap2it.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Justice of the peace fined for showing customers the piece in his pants
source: agn.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
1,500-year-old chocolate goes on display: "It doesn't look a day over 1,400"
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
New boyband hoping to emerge from now free Iraq
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
NewsFlash
 
Actor Gregory Peck has died at 87
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop the side of a U-Haul with better representations of the 50 states. Link goes to a page featuring the Giant Shroom truck of Michigan
source: botit.botany.wisc.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Sacramento city council member complains that half of students in local schools are still below the 50th percentile
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News24)
 
 
 
Company bans employees from smoking in their own homes
source: news24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Competition measures men by how many sheep they can do
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Popularity of mascot causes duck pond to be built at Aflac headquarters
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
Boobies
 
Miss Universe slide show (safe for work)
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Palestinian kill Israelis, Israelis bulldoze Palestinian's home. "Road map" doesn't allow for violence off-ramps
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OCRegister)
 
 
 
Hersheys selling green chocolate syrup to compete with Heinz's green ketchup
source: www2.ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mainichi Daily News)
 
 
 
Cab drivers' lives read like letters to Penthouse
source: mdn.mainichi.co.jp   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
Astronauts in space take strange photo of the Moon floating in Earth's atmosphere (pic)
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(QSR)
 
 
 
McDonald's to put Sega handheld games in with Happy Meals
source: qsrmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(East Anglian Daily Times)
 
 
 
Suffolk woman complains to council that neighbour's horse urinates too loudly
source: eadt.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
David Brinkley dies at 82. Pre-manufactured CNN tribute page expected soon
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fish discover pleasure in porn
source: online.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Adam Ant decides last drunken outing wasn't embarassing enough, decides to strip this time
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand News)
 
 
 
College students spend more on beer than on rent
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop these things with giant heads mourning at a protest
source: us.news1.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Michael Bolton sent to prison for 25 years for forcible sodomy
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Entire Baghdad Museum looting story a crock. "These days you cannot say anything too bad about the Yanks and not be believed."
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(mserv)
 
 
 
A.I. that plays 20 Questions. Knows most bad words already
source: y.20q.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsfilter)
 
Boobies
 
The Matrix Reloaded: Monica Belluci, undressed (not safe for work)
source: newsfilter.org
 
(WSFA)
 
 
 
Thousands of street signs being stolen in one county. "Booger Hollow Road" and "'That Ain't It Road" signs high on the list
source: wsfa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Survey finds 50 percent of kids age 13 claim to have had oral sex. "I did too. You don't know her... she lives in Canada"
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Ten-year-old kid commits second driving offense
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
If Lincoln had had PowerPoint at Gettysburg
source: norvig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Witch will compel Loch Ness Monster to appear with spell
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Man accused of being drunk is put in jail for violating probation, stuffs his clothes down the toilet to prove he's sober
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Charlotte Bobcats unveil new logo. Design them a better one
source: nba.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Runaway cows continue to elude farmer through smart tactics. "We know where eight of them are but when they come out in the field and they see us, they run in the woods"
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(A-ha.com)
 
 
 
Singer of A-Ha to release own line of bread. Baaaaaaake oooonnnnn meeeeeeeee
source: a-ha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(charleston.net)
 
 
 
Marriage that began on coon hunt just went downhill from there
source: charleston.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTNow)
 
 
 
Man tries to save $55 delivery charge by driving lawn mower home from Lowe's. Gets $78 ticket for being cheap
source: ctnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Right Wing News)
 
 
 
If Bush lied about WMD, then so did a lot of Democrats
source: rightwingnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed June 11, 2003
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Yanks lose to Astros in a combined no-hitter. First no-hitter against Yanks since '58. Duke sucks
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indy Channel)
 
 
 
Comcast cable cracking down on people who receive free channels and don't report it
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AFP)
 
 
 
America's millionaires slightly poorer than before, still millionaires
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop the Taco Bell Dog in all his glory
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Post Gazette)
 
 
 
Don't pay your hooker enough, get charged with rape
source: post-gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKYC)
 
 
 
Woman caught breastfeeding while driving on turnpike
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WAFB)
 
 
 
Wrestling a burglar and killing him with his own gun deserves a "hero" tag, but forgetting to hide three pounds of pot afterward gets the "dumbass" tag
source: wafb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Farker Flickinator needs to plan boobieless bachelor party. Bride-to-be not allowing groom-to-be to go to nudie bar. Please suggest alternatives
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Hospital keeps faxing patient reports to Mike Dosskey's house and he's getting pissed off
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Gal)
 
Weeners
 
Men for all seasons (safe for work)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
China cracks down on Russian linguists. Cunning linguists may be able to evade ban
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Inmate sues Nebraska for failing to deliver his mail
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Attend the 3rd Annual Nigerian Email Conference
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
"We are not a group of stupid, naïve women," said the group of 50 who thought they were engaged to the same soldier in Afghanistan
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Hans Blix lashes out at "bastards" in Washington for trying to smear him. What, the whole city?
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
What you say? The singles released by the American Idol guys suck? That's unpossible
source: www2.bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
Hot, new female Terminator talks about T3: Rise of the Machines
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IOL.co.za)
 
 
 
Beauty contest for little kids scraps "sexy bodies" category
source: iol.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aftenposten.no)
 
 
 
Norwegian women become Internet butt models without knowing it
source: aftenposten.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News24)
 
 
 
Jerry Springer announces he's forming exploratory committee for U.S. Senate race. Committee to be composed of dwarves, cross burners, Siamese twins and skanky hos
source: news24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canada.com)
 
 
 
Vancouver police vow to bust up play featuring oral sex. Even if the theatre has a licker-license
source: canada.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Do we really need to be told not to put firecrackers in our mouths?
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
School district pays $190,000 in damages when student contracts herpes in wrestling match
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mid-Day Mumbai)
 
 
 
Doctors remove 55kg of plastic from cow
source: web.mid-day.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Lawsuit valedictorian to skip graduation altogether
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CourtTV)
 
 
 
Woman pays second fine for writing obscene comment on check
source: courttv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
England 2, Slovakia 1 -- 50,000 Scots mumble to themselves, go back to drinking beer
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Uncle Sam wants you to be all you can be, and he doesn't care that you're seven years old
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Plans for graduation party interrupted when police dig up five bodies in yard
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(St. Petersburg Times)
 
 
 
Mom zaps daughter with stun gun for using home computer
source: sptimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TDN)
 
 
 
Shoeless man in his skivvies chases away bear with a chunk of rebar
source: tdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC 24 Toledo)
 
 
 
Man squeezes five cows into '96 Camry
source: wnwo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Hanged man cleared after 53 years. Not expected to release book
source: guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Kentucky Derby winner War Emblem puts owners in $17 million quandry for refusing to hump dames
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Hot-teen grunting action distracts opponents and male tennis umpires
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NCBuy)
 
 
 
U.S. suffers from massive trade deficit in cow dung/urine industry
source: ncbuy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Bill Clinton calls Sammy Sosa to offer advice
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NewsMax)
 
 
 
Former bodyguard says Hilary wanted to get busy
source: newsmax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Six thousand men get drunk and beat themselves to a pulp to ensure richer, more prosperous crops
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
England 0, Slovakia 1 -- 50,000 Scots die laughing. Pin heard dropping in Middlesborough
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sedalia Democrat)
 
 
 
Man unleashes army of bees in Wal-Mart in order to steal $61.48 in merchandise
source: sedaliademocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Viewers point out cartoon mermaid has smaller breasts
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Dial-a-Dog at Safeco Field -- Just one more hopeless attempt at getting fans to stay in their seats
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(iFilm.com)
 
Boobies
 
Kelly Preston gets naked. Scientology surrenders (video not safe for work)
source: ifilm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop what this British policeman is smiling about
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Sparks Tribune)
 
 
 
Pregnant woman impaled by mic stand after fall, swears off karaoke
source: charlotte.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Orsm)
 
Boobies
 
Red-headed goddess Heather Christensen (not safe for work)
source: orsm.net
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Globetrotter "Clyde the Glide" and Richard Hertz indicted for $10M mail fraud scheme. All together now: Who's Dick Hertz?
source: foxsports.lycos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People News)
 
 
 
Renee Zellweger prepares for next movie by eating 20 doughnuts a day for five weeks
source: peoplenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Sosa'a suspension reduced to seven games
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Years of fending off drunks comes in handy as woman fights off crocodile
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsday)
 
 
 
Fourth graders save over one million pennies, blow it all on shaky investment.
source: newsday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Warriors in loincloths less scary than warriors completely naked
source: famulus.msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(some girl)
 
Boobies
 
Kelly Brook (not safe for work)
source: home.freeuk.com
 
(Shore Line Times)
 
 
 
When at first you don't succeed at public masturbation, get arrested for third time
source: zwire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Konami introduces cellphone that doubles as control for remote-controlled cars. Up up down down left right left right B A start
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Cargo rocket arrives at International Space Station with desperately needed frog music
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
The Suns, who play in America West Arena, only fly Southwest
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Man who needlessly paid sewer bills for 24 years figures out he has been on septic tank all along
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Thedailytimes.com)
 
 
 
Tennessee governor signs bill into law allowing motorcyclists to run red lights if they "exercise due care"
source: thedailytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Worldcom exec: ''Show those numbers to the f***ing auditors and I'll throw you out the f***king window''
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Tourist in NY sues transit authority because subway conductor was not friendly or helpful
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Useful phrases David Beckham will need when he plays for Real Madrid
source: football.guardian.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Hollywood is out of ideas: Transformers to become live-action movie
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ICNetwork)
 
 
 
Joke will be on Australia when they lose against Welsh in rugby
source: icwales.icnetwork.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Photoshop John Ashcroft with some very confidential documents
source: us.news2.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Giant Penis Guy wins lawsuit to have 10 Commandments removed from schools
source: newsnet5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Juneau Empire)
 
 
 
Woman loses $50,000 hidden in bear. Was apprehensive about reporting it, insists it's not drug money
source: juneauempire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Oregonian)
 
 
 
Public officials, eyeing solution for guide dogs, shocked by electric train tracks
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Universal Studio promises final version of The Hulk will not look as cheesy as the trailer. Honest. Really. They swear
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Wil conquering some driftwood
source: wilwheaton.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(QCOnline)
 
 
 
As fun as it may sound, don't put bluegills in your mouth
source: qconline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Husband sues marriage counselor for having sex with his wife
source: thesundaymail.news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue June 10, 2003
(India Times)
 
 
 
New wakeup service lets you be awakened by Pamela Anderson for $8. Still not as effective as being awakened by Gilbert Gottfried
source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pacific Business News)
 
 
 
Airline ordered to stop pretending it flies to Hawaii
source: bizjournals.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Orioles fan runs onto field, throws cork at Sosa. Other Orioles fans don't get the joke
source: sports.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Deranged man pulled off street turns out to be woman missing for 53 years
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wnbc.com)
 
 
 
New Jersey Devils don't know where to have victory celebration because they're a turnpike exit
source: wnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
When confronted by cops, drunk and pantless priest repeatedly asks them to give him blowjobs
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Canadian theatrical history being made with first on-stage blowjobs
source: globeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scientific American)
 
 
 
Wrigley's patents Viagra chewing gum. Big Red abbreviating slogan to "longer"
source: sciam.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Justin Timberlake can school you on multi-player Halo
source: seattletimes.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rapid City Journal)
 
 
 
Woman gives birth on hike up Crazy Horse monument
source: rapidcityjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wesh.com)
 
 
 
Florida registry of career criminals available online. But, the system is down, yo
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vidasworld)
 
Boobies
 
The Ass-tastic Vida Guerra has her own website. Probably not safe for work
source: vidasworld.com
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Madonna to sell clothes for Gap. Insert your own "Madonna" and "gap" jokes here
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Rumsfeld says Saddam directing Iraqi resistance even if he's dead
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Found mummy may be either Queen Nefertiti or Melanie Griffith
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Early humans lost their body hair as a result of selective breeding with those who could show they weren't covered in bugs. The existence of pubic hair continues to baffle the experts, needs more study
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Bulletin)
 
 
 
Principal rewards student achievement by kissing goat
source: dailybulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Times)
 
 
 
Linkin Park singer released from hospital. Turns out hamsters are now classified as "parasites"
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Streaking.org)
 
 
 
Fark lurker BBCPFC planning to streak during school finals, what should his catch phrase be? Link goes to inspiration
source: soulcancer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV)
 
 
 
Parents fearful about child kidnappings warned not to become vigilantes; they should leave all hysterical overreaction to media and politicians
source: ctv.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
War-ban pizza man will spend a week in the can
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Police raid minister's home, confiscate "holy herb" -- 200 marijuana plants integral to services at his church, The Center for Healing and Spiritual Renewal
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Article on mondegreens (when you mishear a lyric in a song and even if the words seem a bit daft or total nonsense, they simply stay in your head and you always sing them that way); from Flashdance: "Take your pants down and make it happen"
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Massachusetts requires reduction in art and other things hanging in classrooms. Claims they are fire hazards
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this guy doing his best John Travolta impersonation
source: justmitch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
Tatu duo more popular than Michael Jackson in Japan
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Beckham rejects Barcelona
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police looking for place to nap find a dead guy on fire instead
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local6)
 
Video
 
Girl gets towed away from 7-11 in locked van while mom gets coffee (with pics, video)
source: local6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
FAA uncovers evidence that maintenance failure, not fat people, was cause of Charlotte crash
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
The skies will soon be littered with NASA's space-age unmanned aerial vehicles
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Education)
 
 
 
Why are divorce laws unfair to men?
source: askmen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Months of intense study and preparation needed for star of Dumb and Dumberer
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lowell Sun)
 
 
 
Be on lookout for mysterious animal roaming streets. It's bigger than a dog, smaller than media hysteria
source: lowellsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Making 'em laugh is good for picking up chicks, not so good for robbing convenience stores
source: thestate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twin Cities)
 
 
 
Police say "Spandex Man" has a habit of asking women to rate him while he fondles himself
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Ten words every high school graduate should know. Oddly, all are different from George Carlon's seven words
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(pottstown mercury)
 
 
 
Man puts up sign in front of business declaring innocence in roadside masturbation incident
source: pottstownmercury.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Local reader asks he it's OK to wear only a thong while jogging
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Diamond thief passes the evidence
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBSpot)
 
 
 
Apple enters iLoo fray with Pee4 laptop
source: bbspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Democrat & Chronicle)
 
 
 
Student hacks school's computer and deletes the junior class
source: democratandchronicle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Review)
 
 
 
Senator holding up military promotions because he hasn't received his pork yet
source: nationalreview.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OC register)
 
 
 
Powell, Rice say Iraq's arms will surface. Head and torso probably won't
source: www2.ocregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(All Access)
 
 
 
Crazy cat woman fights city to keep 100 cats in dentist office
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Placebos can treat depression just as well as real drugs
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Pete Yorn says he wants penis-reduction surgery, because it's getting out of hand
source: seattlepi.nwsource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Pop star Mandy Moore to appear nude in flick
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass sculpture replaces Saddam statue in Baghdad
source: news.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(des moines register)
 
 
 
Man tries to pick up women at Iowa salons without pants. Who says romance is dead?
source: dmregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Martha Stewart gets a "discreet" mugshot and fingerprinting. Come on, Smoking Gun, you can do it! Smo-King Gun! Smo-King Gun!
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
Manchester United offers David Beckham to FC Barcelona
source: news.bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Classified memorials appear in NY Post from Gotti family members one year after his death
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iwon)
 
 
 
David Letterman tells Paul Shaffer he has "tired-ass syndrome," plans to take unknown amount of time off. Tom Arnold to host show
source: apnews1.iwon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Deer smashes through window, chases woman
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pop-up ad for healthcare reform
source: tribalfusion.speedera.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Expatica)
 
 
 
Dutch police prone to partake
source: expatica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Iwon)
 
 
 
Ruuuuuuuuuben to stop wearing 205 shirts. Owner of company ran out of fabric
source: apnews1.iwon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Man shoots burglar sneaking into toddlers bedroom. Gets three days in jail for disorderly conduct
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(iafrica)
 
 
 
Men carjack driver for his BMW. Not satisfied with that, proceed to clothesjack him as well
source: iafrica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(eBay)
 
 
 
When I was a kid, growing up, the only stuffed animal I had was an old paint roller with eyes... I called him Rex
source: cgi.ebay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Scrotally applied testosterone patches no more effective than other delivery methods but make wearers feel more masculine
source: news.independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Melanie Griffith's face about to explode
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Madison Courier)
 
 
 
Exploding aerosol air freshener awakens woman in mobile home fire. May be only known incidence of mobile home in country equipped with air freshener
source: madisoncourier.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Quick, photoshop the pope before he falls asleep again
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pioneer Press)
 
 
 
Due to budget cuts, the Minneapolis Public Library system has dropped its earthquake insurance
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Iraqis making jokes about Saddam; U.S. troops making jokes about the French
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon June 09, 2003
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
New Jersey Devils win Stanley Cup
source: sportsillustrated.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Honolulu Advertiser)
 
 
 
Photoshop these guys washing down a building roof
source: the.honoluluadvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Thirty firemen take six hours to hoist 585-pound woman to hospital with crane
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Sparks Tribune)
 
 
 
Professional partygoers make $100-$300 a night
source: charlotte.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Charleston Post Courier)
 
 
 
Everybody who has a locker next to Greg Maddux's has lasted only one year with the Braves, even Wally Joyner who drove to Krispy Kreme to get donuts for Maddux
source: charleston.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Four of five kids get inappropriate spam. Other kid not looking hard enough
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
You know the interview didn't go well when your prospective boss has you arrested
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
If you're going to climb a pole to steal cable TV, make sure your house isn't full of kids and feces
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MN.us)
 
 
 
Minnesota's conservation license plate just an excuse to see deers getting their swerve on
source: dnr.state.mn.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop an ad for GlassFantasy.com: Your information source for adult toys made of Pyrex glass (site may not be SFW). Voting enabled, rules/prizes in the comments. LINK NSFW entries. Consult the FArQ if you have questions.
source: glassfantasy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Remember the 170,000 artifacts stolen from the Iraqi National museum? Museum director was misquoted -- only 33 pieces are missing
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Cash crisis forces U.S. to print Saddam banknotes
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sports by Brooks)
 
 
 
Stud fees for thoroughbred racehorses peter out
source: sportsbybrooks.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The Smoking Gun featured on CNN, complete with unflattering pic of site founder
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zap2it.com)
 
 
 
Survivor winner Jenna and her bosom buddy Heidi stripping for Playboy
source: tv.zap2it.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Mob attacks French actors having sex in front of pope
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Owner of skydiving center criticized for large number of fatalities dies in skydiving accident
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Gollum's obscenity-filled acceptance speech from the MTV Movie Awards
source: theonering.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wesh.com)
 
 
 
Confused baby buffalo thinks she's a dog
source: wesh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
In honor of Ford's 100th anniversary, a list of the crappiest cars they ever produced
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Red vs. Blue)
 
 
 
Red vs. Blue Episode 9 released
source: redvsblue.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Nigerian email scam Mad Libs
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Republicans to learn Spanish to get Hispanic votes. Phrases "Yo quiero para usted a tener un corte de impuestos" and "Soy un uniter, no un divisor" emphasized
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Theme: Literal interpretation of sitcom titles
source: popentertainment.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Handwriting experts worry that computers may spell death for cursive writing. Young kids LOL.
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Sparks Tribune)
 
 
 
Pissed-off waiter takes customer revenge to new heights
source: charlotte.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
 
 
Mars Exploration Rover will land on Mars by bouncing inside giant airbags (pics and video)
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News24)
 
 
 
Mourning relatives, dead person ordered out of vehicle in hearse-jacking
source: news24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
British scientist claims odds of global armageddon at 50 percent. Odds that same British scientist knows the fax number to send made-up BS as a press release at 100 percent
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police called in to arrest rubber spider, on the lookout for fake dog poo accomplice
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Sun photographer spots pink g-string in Prince's undie pile
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Australian government spends $144,000 to improve TV reception for 65 homes. Cheaper than teaching them to read
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC28)
 
 
 
Governor of Texas to put redistricting back on top of the agenda for a House session, Texas Democrats fill their van with gas and begin heading towards Oklahoma
source: abc28.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Judge says a picture is worth a thousand words, and lost vacation photos are worth $8,000
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBSpot)
 
 
 
Top 11 movies based on Shakira's ass
source: bbspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Star of NBC's new reality series doesn't tell NBC his military career went down the tubes after he drunkenly groped the breasts of a Navy officer
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
"The bears started looking good." Eric Rudolph says he really missed sex for five years
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Eircom.net)
 
 
 
Irish drivers find way to avoid speeding convictions - not turning up in court
source: home.eircom.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
North Korea admits nuke plans
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Homestar Runner)
 
 
 
New Strong Bad email
source: homestarrunner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop this actual billboard featuring KY Farker Tadpole (guy on the right)
source: img.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
British drivers may soon be tracked by satellite so the government can tax them for every mile they drive
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Announcing June's Disease to Panic About: MonkeyPox
source: story.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DatingFun)
 
 
 
Kellogg's Cornflakes designed to stop people wanking
source: datingfun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RedOrbit)
 
Boobies
 
A gathering of over 7,000 people pose nude in Spain (with safe-for-work pics)
source: rednova.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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