Bar will host "Smallest Penis Contest" ... and since it will be held in New York, competition is expected to be stiff
Woman walking near the Arrivals section of the Fort Lauderdale Airport unexpectedly departs by bus
Photoshop this banged up big ball
Saint Louis Fark Party, June 1 - Get drunk and climb on stuff, two week countdown
"Oops The 5 greatest scientific blunders." From someone who apparently doesn't understand how science works
Thief and suspected foodie turns himself in. Reason: "I want to eat the tasty food Nagata Precinct serves prisoners in its holding cells"
Photoshop this careful crossing
Prague trains will soon offer cars geared exclusively toward singles seeking relationships. Officials suspect the caboose will usually end up being packed
Gigantic pile of coke discovered in Detroit. Why is this news? Well, by "gigantic," the story means "an entire city block"
1 In 5 US children may have a mental disorder. In other news, Total Fark membership may be expected to multiply
Now that the American economy has been reignited, Wal-Mart is losing customers left and right. This is bad news... for no one, really
Greek restaurant shut down after inspector notices some of the food still gyrating under its own power
Indisputable PROOF that there is no God. Where's your G...Oh, nevermind
90% of the world's known glitter supply is in Malmö as acts from 26 countries put their kitschiest feet forward. Who will get the coveted "douze points"? Your 2013 Eurovision Song Contest thread. This year certified 100% Jedward-free
College student fakes his own kidnapping in order to avoid telling his parents that he's failing a class, fails to think his cunning plan all the way through
We are extremely diverse and want to include everybody, except white heterosexual males
How we will know if we won the "Afghan Conflict". Step 1, Mission Creep. Step 2, Rename it a "Conflict" instead of bounty hunt for al Queda. Step 3, let the Afghans have Afghanistan
Dam you're tall
Write a parking ticket for a widower sitting behind the hearse carrying his wife? You'd better believe that's an ass kicking
Florida implements system to allow Florida citizens to call each other terrorists
Explosion on the moon visible from Earth. North Korea scrambling to take credit
Pink Barbie-themed tourist trap objectifies woman, says topless female protestor as she sets fire to a crucified Barbie doll. Subby wants a topless female protestor-themed tourist trap
Man pleads guilty to being naked in public, despite the fact he was clearly wearing a blonde wig, pink gloves, pink shoes and was covered in hair removal cream
Photoshop these tenacious trainees
Boy who experts said would never be able to read has an I.Q. of 189. SCIENCE MARCHES ON
Liberté, égalité, fraternité
Cats with lion hats on their heads are all the Internet rage for this week's Caturday
North Korea launches three missiles into the Sea of Japan, declares victory over water
Gay rights march in Georgia turns violent after priests lead mob against protesters
Twenty-one reasons why Ira Glass is the most perfect man alive
People give the craziest excuses just to stay home from work, but a study of 1,000 workers and 1,000 bosses have brought out some real doozies
It's a good idea not to get embalmed. Ya know... just in case you want to wake up in the middle of your own funeral
Building a fake cemetery to keep the homeless from sleeping on your property? BRILLIANT
Kitten survives 30-minute cycle in washing machine, emerges agitated, but fluffy and soft in time for Caturday
China finds yet another way to surpass America
