Drew Curtis' FARK.com

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Not News Sports Business Geek Showbiz Politics Music Video All

Sat November 21, 2009

Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Photoshop these spotted sea squirts (photography.nationalgeographic.com)	(19)
(Limerick Leader)		100ft Christmas Tree crashes into bridge, makes its presents felt (limerickleader.ie)	(72)

Fri November 20, 2009

	Photoshop this diver (photography.nationalgeographic.com)	(63)
(FarmAndDairy)	Opportunities exist for beef, dairy producers to utilize damaged corn. Subby is sure milking the corn today (farmanddairy.com)	(60)
	And if thy ex-girlfriend's eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from the 8th-floor balcony (dailymail.co.uk)	(109)
	What has being a Dungeons and Dragons player taught you about dating? (advice.nerve.com)	(246)
	Yesterday: Stop getting mamograms, they're too expensive. Today: Stop getting pap smears, they're too expensive (abcnews.go.com)	(179)
	This week's TSG mugshot round up- someone is gettin' fired at the "gun" (thesmokinggun.com)	(261)
(Some Guy)	The Great Corn Adventure (urbanext.illinois.edu)	(52)
	Human Fat found in cosmetics. You submitted this with a Tyler Durden reference (theage.com.au)	(184)
	Going to the movies this weekend? Chow down three McDonald's Quarter Pounders and 12 pats of butter before you go. It'll be healthier than ordering a medium popcorn (without butter) (consumerist.com)	(122)
(Some Guy)	Two girls make 1st Cornhole Cup a success (sbc.edu)	(57)
	If you have hacked your way into the world's most prestigious global warming center and downloaded documents indicating the whole thing is a hoax, quite a few people would like a word with you (michellemalkin.com)	(671)
(The Roanoke Times)	Tupperware crash causes delays on interstate, officials reportedly couldn't contain the spill (roanoke.com)	(17)
(Some Guy)	China's corn output is likely to drop during 2010 due to continued drought in the North East region (pr-inside.com)	(55)
	Yorkshire Ripper nearly blinded by Broadmoor Killer. No, this is not a story about pro-wrestling (dailymail.co.uk)	(38)
	When the police knock on your door, it's best not to answer it while covered in bank dye and holding a big bag of crack (tampabay.com)	(54)
(Some Guy)	Man hhhhhholds up bank armed only with his hhhhhhalitosis (pasadenastarnews.com)	(28)
(Some Guy)	Angry man in van terrorizes peaceful island for years; now the lead singer of the Killer Bagels is dead. Not a movie plot, unfortunately (timescolonist.com)	(42)
	Apple tells smokers who have sent their machines in for repair that their warranty is voided, because it doesn't cover damage caused by second-hand smoke. WHERE IS YOUR OS X NOW? (consumerist.com)	(653)
	Photoshop these seashore shards (cache.boston.com)	(43)
	ADM says corn chowder will be creamier for the holidays this year (reuters.com)	(69)
(Some Correctness)	Superhero Smackdown: The FINAL. Superman vs The Flash (thecorrectness.com)	(193)
(TheIndyChannel)	Doughnut shop robbed and employees forced to remove pants at gunpoint; unbelievably, police were nowhere to be found (theindychannel.com)	(73)
	AAA releases their much anticipated report concluding that many people will be driving during the Thanksgiving holiday (washingtonpost.com)	(53)
(Some Guy)	Woman wakes up to find a strange man wearing her bra and panties (w/ picture of what a strange man who wears bras and panties might look like) (katu.com)	(92)
	Nominations now open for Fark's 2009 Headline of the Year contest (repost, link goes to Monday's thread) (fark.com)	(122)
	Residents of Cockermouth are rescued from their homes by dinghys on Friday after heavy rain caused flooding in Cumbria (cbc.ca)	(59)
	Sharp-eyed researcher finds laundry instructions on Shroud of Turin (startribune.com)	(246)
(NBC New York)	I bet you weren't expecting the "She can't have been drunk; she talked McDonald's into making lunch during breakfast hours" defense (nbcnewyork.com)	(85)
(Danbury News Times)	Man arrested for assault thanks to his last name, helpfully displayed on his vanity plate. That's some F1NE police work, Lou (newstimes.com)	(31)
(Some Guy)	Man claims his friends got drunk and cut off his electronic monitoring device. Or maybe some students attacked him and cut it off. He can't decide (leaderlive.co.uk)	(6)
	The rule about wearing white after Labor Day is now being strictly enforced by men with guns (torontosun.com)	(105)
	Music teacher jailed for playing skin flute. You submitted this with A minor joke (news.com.au)	(113)
(WTVR)	Miley Cyrus' tour bus crashes in Virginia. Driver dead, no word on the condition of either Miley Cyrus or Hannah Montana (myfox8.com)	(346)
	Poncho Claus, an entertainer known for leading a caravan of low riders through neighborhoods and passing out Christmas presents, has been hospitalized. Bueno suerte, señor (khou.com)	(34)
	"Predator" who posed as Australian cab driver jailed, possibly by Lieutenant Harrigan (news.com.au)	(31)
	A Bronx hospital and the city are really hEARing it from a Bronx man whose ear was thrown in the garbage. Ear we go again with another unbEARable lawsuit (nydailynews.com)	(36)
	If you've collected $150,000 in fraudulent disability benefits, you may want to keep your able-bodied ass off of national television (fe17.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com)	(75)
	TSG Friday Photo Fun challenges you to identify the celebrity who was busted at the pictured location. Contest closes 6PM Eastern (thesmokinggun.com)	(96)
	I don't care if she is Brazilian, there's "hittable crazy", then there's "set fire to a transvestite over a missing handbag" crazy. You've got to draw the line somewhere (news.bbc.co.uk)	(84)
	Police officer missing after "Biblical floods" hit Northern England. Authorities expect to begin the search in 40 days (news.com.au)	(38)
	Scientists have learned some amaizing kernels of truth from mapping the corn genome. "They're just popping up" (washingtonpost.com)	(65)
	Royal Carribbean launches "Oasis of the Seas," a ship that's five times as big as the Titanic, can't dock in many ports because of its size, and can spread Hantavirus to almost 7000 people at once (usatoday.com)	(267)
(Only in Vantucky)	Not News: Woman organizes charity carwash for hit and run victim's family. Sorta News: Woman steals from carwash. FARK: To bail out the suspect in the hit and run case (columbian.com)	(48)
	Top S. Korean model found hanged in her Paris apartment. Police are unable to determine a time of death, because, as a model, she's looked like a corpse for some years now (news.yahoo.com)	(90)
	Here it is, this year's USA Today bit about what infrequent fliers can expect at airports, including less flights, higher fees, longer lines, alligator pits,and a Muzak version of "Oops I Did It Again" played on an infinite loop (usatoday.com)	(77)
	Urlee Inglesh lurneeng comz undurr acuhdemik atak (thelocal.se)	(37)
(Some Guy)	Iowa town needs emergency coconuts after massive lime spill (timesrepublican.com)	(29)
(Awww)	Cameraman captures photos of a polar bear viciously attacking a human (magic-city-news.com)	(100)
(Some Chicken Lover)	Apparently, the idea of putting on a giant chicken suit and crashing a city council meeting hasn't gotten old in Colorado (wtsp.com)	(36)
	Not news: coming home from a weekend trip and discovering that your house was broken into. FARK: broken into to hang Christmas decorations (hosted.ap.org)	(34)
	If you're so exhausted after a three day coke and hooker orgy that the pimp cuts you off, it might be a sign you need to slow down. Wouldn't you agree, Rabbi? (timesonline.co.uk)	(95)
	Man accused of using squeegee to attack another in fight over gas pump. Victim says he clearly saw what happened (baltimoresun.com)	(30)
	Photoshop these Himalayan horn blowers (cache.boston.com)	(25)
	Sunnyvale, CA named happiest place in America, Crappyville still least happy (cbs5.com)	(98)
(Some Guy)	Couple arrested for refusing to pay a mandatory 18 percent gratuity at a restaurant. "I had to get napkins and silverware for the table myself" (nbcphiladelphia.com)	(584)
(Chronicle-Herald)	UK man invents humane lobster killing device. PETA buys two, ships them to Arizona for promotional lobsterfest. Courier company loses the devices. PETA forced to boil hundreds of lobsters alive to avoid crustecean-craving lynch mob (thechronicleherald.ca)	(155)
	Three French hens, two turtle doves, and 316,000 bongs disguised as christmas ornaments in a shipping container (foxnews.com)	(61)
	Gardener finds a squash in the shape of a duck. The Sun is there (thesun.co.uk)	(37)
	500 sheep die in crash. Try not to lose any sleep over it (news.com.au)	(48)
	Jeanne-Claude, co-creator of "The Gates," and wife of Christo, dies at 74. That's a wrap (huffingtonpost.com)	(57)
	New L.A. ACORN sting: "Why, sure I'll help you launder money to pimp underaged girls" (hotair.com)	(388)
	Squirrels, having trouble climbing down trees, evolved more flexible ankles. Cats, having trouble climbing down trees, evolved humans with pulleys (boston.com)	(85)