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Mon July 24, 2017
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Proof that Farkers are smrt
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(Design You Trust)
 
 
 
Photoshop this pensive poser and his pills
source: main-designyoutrust.netdna-ssl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Tonight at 8PM EDT, Paul's Memory Bank brings you 2 hours of songs beginning with the letter "T" (and 'The' doesn't count). We're going all the way back to 1939 for the first one
source: beta.tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
He thought he had blisters from a hike, it was flesh-eating bacteria instead
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Police in Pennsylvania were looking for stolen laptops, find a $40 million bitcoin scam instead
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Naked and chasing seagulls is no way to go through...actually, strike that. That doesn't sound like a bad life at all
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBUR Boston)
 
 
 
NPR editorialist wants you to know that she doesn't watch any of the television shows you do. Are you listening? I SAID SHE DOESN'T WATCH ANY OF THE SHOWS YOU DO
source: wbur.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Police arm K-9 unit with naloxone in case of dog overdose. Told you goldendoodles are a gateway drug
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Charlie Gard's parents: "never mind"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop buster Keaton and his doll
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
U.S. malls are offering something you cannot buy on Amazon: people punching each other
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
You owe your boss 8 additional hours of work per week to make up for all the time you waste on your smartphone
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
FBI surveillance van from the eighties for sale on Ebay. Worth about as much as an eighties van without a bunch of outdated old surveillance equipment
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Add summer camp to the list of things being ruined by helicopter parents
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Panama City News Herald)
 
 
 
By 2100, Florida's economy will be one of the strongest in the US, thanks to all the new scuba diving destinations
source: newsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Two women caught at airport trying to smuggle 4kg of gold in their underwear. Au my
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Welcome to your new job as a programmer. Here is your employee ID card, your lanyard, and the microchip we would like to implant in you
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-07-16 to Sat 2017-07-22
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
British boffins at NHS advise doctors to only prescribe real medicine and stop prescribing £90,000 a year in placebos
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Trump hints of Rudy Giuliani replacing Sessions as Attorney General
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
GOP consultant claims: "Kid Rock would be 'prohibitive favorite' if he enters Michigan Senate race"
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
When Swiss people are going nuts and attacking people with chainsaws, you know the world has finally gone to hell
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
For $75 and a 250-word essay, you can own a bookstore in Wellsboro, Pennsylvania
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Asshat "social media star" booted from Disney Channel show after Disney discovers he's an asshat
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this football player assembler
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KAIT Jonesboro)
 
 
 
Being literate and not having a crazy person as President helps Canadians deal with and actually have health care
source: kait8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Texas man ordered to pay $82,000 in child support for kid who isn't his
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Your request for information about gutting the Freedom of Information Act has been denied
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Ten-year-old boy described by police as "flashy" cuts off his ankle monitor the day after being charged with stealing a car and steals another one, making it his fourth arrest for car theft in six weeks. I predict a bright future for this young man
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(National Post)
 
 
 
Today's waste of money is brought to you by Luxury Toothpicks
source: nationalpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
After the 2016 election, otters see us as sufficiently weakened to begin their long planned uprising
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun July 23, 2017
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
"The purpose of the National Park Service is to preserve unimpaired the natural and cultural resources and values of the National Park System for the enjoyment, education, and inspiration of this and future generations." Yeah, well, so much for that
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Remember how Norway's humane prisons could never work in the U.S. because of Reasons? The ideas behind humane prisons have been implemented in one U.S. state as a cost cutting measure, and seems to work rather well. Just saying
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSMV Nashville)
 
 
 
While crashing off the ramp, aim your SUV to land on something soft, like a train
source: wsmv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Here's a recipe for lobster, avocado & mango salad that just screams summer in Maine, because Maine is so well known for its mangoes and avocados
source: catchinghealth.bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Oh, the huge manatee
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Yo, dawg, I heard you like felons
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Miss Manners dispenses advice to a self-absorbed idiot, with just the right touch of sarcasm
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Real politicians explain how government would pay for all those cities Thor, Spider-Man, and the X-Men destroy
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this steak
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
While billionaire Barry Diller is trying to give NYC a $250 million park for free, billionaire Douglas Durst is fighting to stop it. Fark: Because Diller once said that Durst's murderous brother should have killed him
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass clouded leopard cubs born in Toronto have started making "chirping" noises
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Jackass in a Transformers mask wielding a fake gun tries to rob a Starbucks. Met by a stubborn barista and an angry older guy. Tag for the old guy's awesome beat down
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
The simple beer tool you never knew you needed
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifehacker)
 
 
 
The best and quickest ways to thaw food. Spoiler alert: you take it out of the freezer
source: lifehacker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop Bono where he should be standing
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Hitler's secret invasion dossier for his plan to invade Britain reveals what he was most afraid of for his troops: Slovenly English housewives, as well as those "small and dark" people of Wales
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
The Louisville, Kentucky Courier-Journal newspaper publishes an epic correction of their referrals to hot dogs as "sandwiches" over the years, beginning in 1887 and ending in 1966
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Well, these used to work
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Nothing like the media needlessly fueling the feud between Baby Boomers and Millennials
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Man who walks his pet sheep everywhere is banned from all supermarket stores after hitting member of staff who asked him to leave (with pic of the lovely couple)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Las Vegas Now)
 
 
 
For Sale: Clown motel. Cheap, creepy, you can own the nightmare of your dreams. Difficulty: Not in Washington DC
source: lasvegasnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: If summer camp brochures actually told the truth
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Take this job and shove it
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Good: You're on a boat in the ocean. Bad: Your boat sinks. Good: You set off a distress signal. Bad: You're 40 miles from shore Good: A rescue helicopter finds you. Bad: They can't send somebody down to rescue you because sharks are in the water
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Who knew so many moon trees grew in the United States?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Mylar balloon triggers power outages. CONGRATULATIONS
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
If you really want to save the planet, you could eat a vegan-based diet or walk your only child to school every day. But if you really want to make a difference, you should lobby, protest, and innovate for changes that alter society's norms
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Discover)
 
 
 
"A number of so-called scientific journals have accepted a Star Wars-themed spoof paper. The manuscript is an absurd mess of factual errors, plagiarism and movie quotes. I know because I wrote it"
source: blogs.discovermagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
In the war on drugs, women experience sexual shakedowns and intrusive searches by abusive police officers
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of music hosted live by a farker in Juneau, Alaska. (9PM AKDT/10PM PDT)
source: beta.tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Animation of earthquakes in Oklahoma and parts of adjoining states from 2004-16. Size of dots and volumes are proportional to equake strengths. Subby recommends watching all the way to the end
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat July 22, 2017
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
The owner of the creationist Ark theme park trashes press for reporting he's ducking taxes, angrily stating "the media is out of control"
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Woman stumbles upon bicyclist being beaten with a small club by a man driving a truck, who promptly drives away. Difficulty: Canada
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Japanese still flout rules on schoolgirl dating services, call them tourist information. "As long as there are girls who can't forget that 'taste of honey' and adults out there who are using the services, it's just a cat and mouse game for us"
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The attorney for the Minnesota cop who shot an unarmed woman wants to know if she was on Ambien on that fateful night. Well this could change everything
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
Here is the actual reason gluten-free Communion wafers are unacceptable to the Catholic Church. Never mind the fact there is no such thing as a gluten allergy
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
...and riding a bicycle on a a sidewalk
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New Jersey just raised the legal smoking age to 21
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy snek
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
♫Well, I was drunk the day my grandgirl needed a ride. And I went to pick her up in the rain. But before we could get to the park in my pickup truck. A monkey jumped in and ate our brains.♫
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox11 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Who is "the winner" of a lottery ticket? The person acquiring it? The person scratching it off? Or the person redeeming it?
source: foxla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these sleeping whales
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Turns out you don't have to be a teacher to sleep with under age boys. Huh
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DW)
 
 
 
You are 10 years old. You got a "C" on your report card. Do you flee to Switzerland?
source: dw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
The solution is obvious: Never eat fresh fruit, as it's obviously trying to kill you
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Heat doesn't just make us cranky, it makes us bad shoppers as well
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Let's take a swim at this debate: saltwater aquariums vs. freshwater aquariums
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Japan's government is so worried about that country's declining birth rate that it is literally paying people to go on dates. Wonder if that would work for Farkers?
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlas Obscura)
 
 
 
Remember when the Yippies tried to take over Disneyland? Good times, man, good times. Wait, you don't know what a yippie was? Get off my lawn, whippersnapper, and fetch me a root beer
source: atlasobscura.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Courier Mail)
 
 
 
Gun shop owner: 2850, Police: 0
source: couriermail.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
In a study that's long been overdue, scientists say late fees don't work with library books
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Good Reads)
 
 
 
The Saturday Morning Book Club wants to know which books you love to re-read again and again. The Saturday Morning Book Club wants to know which books you love to re-read again and again
source: goodreads.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this La Cornue
source: images.twyford-cookers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Philly Voice)
 
 
 
♫ Under the boardwalk, out of the sun, under the boardwalk, we'll be havin' some fun, under the boardwalk, people walking above, under the boardwalk we'll be falling in love, with Caturday ♫
source: phillyvoice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Teen protip: if you're going to egg cyclists from your car, try not to pick competitive mountain bikers who might chase after you. Especially if they're cops on their lunch break. And FFS not if you have weed in the car
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Huh. All it takes is for a pretty blonde white woman to get shot to get heads rolling in the police department
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Strike one: Your wedding is washed out by Cyclone Debbie. Strike two: Four months later your honeymoon is rocked by a earthquake in Greece. Strike three:???
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
You knew it was just a matter of time: Mother Teresa has appeared on a tree
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pink News UK)
 
 
 
University rejects $3 mil donation because it would mean shutting down LGBTQ campus group. Fark Hero: Christian university
source: pinknews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Crazed squirrel goes on biting rampage in park. Witnesses said he seemed a little nuts
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Holy crap video of janitor sparking massive fire with his walk behind floor scrubber
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Russia could force the U.S. military out of Syria
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Jared Kushner's memory is improving. He just remembered 77 assets he left off his financial disclosure forms
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri July 21, 2017
(MSN)
 
 
 
🎵 There she is, Miss Conjugal Visitation 🎵
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lyre player
source: 1.bp.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Police now pursuing charges against five teens who filmed a man in Florida, just to watch him drown
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
You should take pictures of your knob before going on vacation
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Kentucky must pay attorney fees for couples who sued Kim Davis. If only they'd just fired her
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Man's dog sides with girlfriend during arguments? That's a stabbing
source: fox4now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
33-year-old grandfather and Mike Tyson fan... wait, it gets better
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Wait. You got your Japanese tentacle porn in my avant-garde arthouse film
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lex 18)
 
 
 
Ark Encounter's selling themselves to a shell ministry to avoid taxes just happened to breach their agreement with Kentucky for $18 million in tax incentives, so they just lost most of their free money from the government
source: lex18.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lexington Herald Leader)
 
 
 
States that prosecute parents who let their kids shoot other kids, please step forward. Not so fast, Kentucky
source: kentucky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Protip for when you win the lottery: Don't hang up the phone when they call you saying you've won the lottery
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this rocky beach
source: ichef.bbci.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Woman convicted of husband's murder after parrot witness repeats "don't shoot," I guess he didn't get his damned cracker
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"Smishing" is the new cyber security term for stupid people who think it's OK to respond to unsolicited texts from strangers
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Robots: doing the jobs Americans don't want to
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Scalpel....... clamp...... suction......guitar
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
Unsatisfied with posting nudes of his ex on Facebook, man makes them into decals for his motorcycle
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Primary school facing crisis after every single teacher and staffer quits
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Fitz at fault
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Man receives package 14 years late
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"I say attractive women are suspicious just so I can touch them," reveals TSA agent
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Travel ban imposed...on Americans
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Brazilian woman wonders why her car has suddenly broken down, is stunned to discover dog hiding in the engine. With pic of dog with "did i do that?" look on its face
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this neighborhood
source: elegantgates.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Mom at hospital forced to wait three hours with her dead baby in a bag, which was subby's favorite Loudon Wainwright tune back in the day
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Lawfareblog)
 
 
 
Trump's NYT interview, collusion, the rule of law, and what happens if he ignores the law
source: lawfareblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ELLE)
 
 
 
Meanwhile in Canada, the Prime Minster is hugging a unicorn puppet
source: elle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
In America we're supposed to burn the flag if it touches the ground. What's the penalty for a Canadian Governor General touching the Queen's elbow? Do they lose Labrador? Ritual flogging by the Archbishop of Canterbury?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photographer viciously mauled while taking pictures. (not safe for stomach)
source: imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
As God as my witness I did not think humpback whales could fly
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
In an effort to lay low until the storm subsides, Kushner's White House connection still being used to lure Chinese investors
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Powerful 6.5-magnitude earthquake hits Greek and Turkish holiday resorts, triggering tsunami
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Marcia Marcia Marcia! Nobody ever arrests Marcia
source: simplemost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
You and your friend come across a man struggling in a pond, obviously in distress, so naturally you A) call for assistance, B) try to find a way to help get him to shore, or C) laugh and film him as he drowns
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Kasoquitz
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
My five-year-old daughter was fined £150 ... for selling lemonade
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
New study finds most guns sold on the dark web originate from one country. Can you guess which it is? Anyone? Anyone?
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox9 Minneapolis)
 
 
 
The dog-shooting cop's body camera video has been released, and it's proof he's a chickenshiat motherfarker
source: fox9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu July 20, 2017
(Shanghaiist)
 
Boobies
 
"Open wide, now here comes your horrific boob job" (Some not safe for work/graphic images)
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"I can only walk 20 to 50 meters at a time. Pay me." "I can't walk on uneven ground. Pay me." "I suffer pain when walking long distances and need to sit down every 20 minutes. Pay me." ... "Oops, you probably shouldn't have seen that"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Priceonomics)
 
 
 
Fark rankinged to be webcite having 6th most higher educatation amount by analyzation
source: priceonomics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
Pentagon study declares American empire is collapsing
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Lawyer for the Boston Strangler, Patty Hearst and OJ now working a Better Call Saul practice above a hair salon
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Post-Brexit, British demand for Irish passports is through the roof. Here's a quick guide for Britons on how to pass for Irish
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Parents of Aurora Theater shooting victim sue ammo merchant. They were warned they would lose and end up paying the plaintiff's legal bills, but they sued anyway. Now they're bankrupt. Sad tag still applies because no one really wins
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Biker)
 
 
 
Photoshop this levitating motorcycle
source: nebula.wsimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Airport sets aside parking spaces just for women: extra wide, painted pink, and each labeled with an image of a high heel shoe. Not surprisingly, some people have a problem with this
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Chilies? In MY vagina?" It's more likely than you think ... if I catch you sleeping with my husband
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
In D.C. for a robotics competition, 6 Burundians decide that returning to Burundi isn't really their thing
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Cleveland Browns' stadium may contain flammable panels similar to the ones used on the London apartment building that caught fire and killed many people. But on the bright side, how many people go to see a Browns game
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Naked gunman fired over 200 rounds in rare sail-by shooting
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
"Sampson told authorities she tried to set the house on fire to kill her girlfriend but denied threatening her girlfriend with a hunting knife"
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Man mistakes cemetery for farmer's market. "They were already having a horrible day, and this just made it more tragic"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Couple claim they can orgasm for up to 18 hours just from hugging. Little man in the boat unavailable for comment
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Voice of America)
 
 
 
Photoshop this fashion trend
source: gdb.voanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Two-year-old found crawling on the roof of its house. Maybe it was bitten by a radioactive spider. I mean, it could happen, right?
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Cecil the Lion's son Xanda shot dead by trophy hunters two years after Minnesota dentist killed his father
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
NewsFlash
 
The Juice is loose
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Man who sued to marry his computer which he watched porn on sues to stop display of gay pride flag
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
No matter how you cut it, people love stealing cheese
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
NY to DC in 29 minutes -- Elon Musk gets go-ahead for hyperloop
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 96.5 Florida)
 
 
 
Angry Florida man shoots out tires of AT&T trucks because they are parked too close to his home. Seems reasonable
source: news965.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVO Kirksville)
 
 
 
Husband set to join wife in prison for child sex crimes. Shouldn't the guards put a stop to that?
source: ktvo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
The best part of waking up is Viagra in your cup
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Mueller is expanding Russia probe to include Trump's business transactions. Trump to fire Mueller in 3...2...1
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(DNA Info)
 
 
 
Man with machete fights man with garbage can. Winner takes on the winner of the tire iron-vs.-bag of dog poo bracket, while it's a bye week for the guy with the gun
source: dnainfo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Plane makes unexpected landing in middle of moving traffic on Long Island road. "GET OFF THE ROAD, YA BUM"
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Not to alarm anybody, but there is spider out there that looks like somebody sewed the head of bunny onto the body of a daddy longlegs
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
French mayor of beach town forced to apologise for a rude plane banner that read "Go home f**king tourists" in English and Spanish
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Aren't you the punny one?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Student posts note on why she's protesting her elite school by pooping on school property because the teachers are sh*tty. Poop
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gallup)
 
 
 
Americans' alcoholic beverage of choice is ... Wait for it. BEER
source: gallup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Released from the oppressive yoke of British rule 20 years ago, Hong Kong is now enjoying the freedom of living as part of China
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Complex)
 
 
 
Don't like the apology letter from your ex-girlfriend? Simple, just grade it and send it back
source: complex.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
The 58-story Millennium Tower in San Francisco is sinking faster than ever. The top of the building is now leaning 14 inches towards the Sales Force Tower, having tilted another 2.5 inches in the first 6 months of 2017
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 637: "Come and Sit with Me". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed July 19, 2017
(BBC)
 
 
 
Ugly-ass baby wombat born in Australian nature refuge
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Digg)
 
 
 
Cop films himself planting evidence at crime scene (with video)
source: digg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
We can't close our eyes to the plight of the city. Kids, are you noticing all this plight?
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about so here's Kyle MacLachlan making a "Twin Peaks" themed bento box on Japanese television
source: io9.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
All I'm saying is, the point of a voodoo doll is kind of lost if you actually stick needles in the person themselves
source: timesofindia.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Former model pays to have four pints of fat injected into her buttocks for the Kim Kardashian look. Of course, if she really wants the whole package, she might consider having a few pints injected directly into her head
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Virginian-Pilot)
 
 
 
Man robs doughnut store twice in one week. Truly, there can be no cruller crime
source: pilotonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Airline passenger upset when two extra feet of legroom appear
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this egg cup holder
source: beldinest.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
This rehab clinic not only allows patients to smoke pot, but encourages it
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
NYPD cop breakdances in street with loaded gun on hip
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
In the event of emergency, your prosthetic leg can be used as a flotation device
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
5 year-old and 2 year-old crash car even though one steered and one worked the brakes. What could possibly go wrong?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
Climate change could mean a much wetter California. Or slightly wetter. Also possible a much drier or somewhat drier California. Or a 100% snow-covered California, according to scientist who just wanted to be in the news today
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Family kicked off JetBlue flight after toddler kicked seat in front of them. Hmm, remind me again which side I'm supposed to be against?
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Tabasco comes out with a new sauce, "Scorpion." 20 times hotter than the original. Read about it on the left, argue about it on the right, all you Franks, Sriracha, Texas Pete's, Crystal, Original Louisiana, Tapatío, Valentina and Cholula lovers
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
If you drown during your river baptism do you go to heaven or hell?
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Trigger a massive, fleet-wide, multi-country "man overboard" drill because you ducked your watch? You'd better get down on your knees and thank your creator you are only standing in front of the Admiral's Mast and not a firing squad, sailor
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: Create a totem pole
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Woman shoots her boyfriend dead because he was in an online death cult and didn't want to pay his five dollars a month
source: articles.pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Saudi miniskirt woman will probably not be beaten. Probably
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Air conditioning technicians suggest you get your unit checked. Seriously? I check it religiously every day
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Head of the clean-up efforts at the Fukushima nuclear power plants, says the recovery from the disaster will nearly be complete once they dump nearly a million tons of radioactive waste into the Pacific Ocean
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Joel Osteen: I am one with the Force and the Force is with me
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
The good folks who brought you the Kalashnikov assault rifle have now created their own battle robot - which can learn from its experiences. But don't worry, Putin says it's perfectly safe
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-J
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Pharmabro Martin "I hope to see you and your four children homeless" Shkreli is the gift that keeps on giving. Sort of like a human Herpes
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
Giant squid landed in Dingle. Marine biologists investigating, hoping to find the angle of the dangle
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Regina Leader-Post)
 
 
 
Notorious 86-year-old jewel thief who had decades of stealing valuable gems has been arrested stealing from Walmart. Oh, how the mighty have fallen
source: leaderpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Once again, dudes: do NOT send unsolicited dick picks to anyone. Especially a judge
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
"Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college." ― Kurt Vonnegut Jr. Well, then; this is your Fark Writers Thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Dumbass: Teenager steals items from Auschwitz for her art project. Fark: an Israeli teenager. WTF: Hoping to stop Holocaust deniers
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Six cars of a freight train have gone off the rails in southwest Pennsylvania. Cars holding wheat, flour, and flammable materials overturned, proving that nothing good ever happens in Lower Turkeyfoot Township on the Hogback Road
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Crackdown proposed on bikini baristas. Look, if they're showing that, the bikini isn't doing anything
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Idaho Statesman)
 
 
 
Vinegar is the new roundup, but not in Idaho
source: idahostatesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
"Do not be alarmed, continue swimming naked. [eats popcorn] Aw, c'mon, continue. Come on! Oh, all right, Lou, open fire"
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Creationists Have Sold Ark Encounter. To Themselves. For $10. To Avoid Taxes
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop this water park that divided by zero
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
World's best son who has dead sister and grieving mom issues, dresses like sister to please mom
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The State)
 
 
 
Twelve-foot, 800-pound NOPE caught in SC lake. (with pic that may haunt your nightmares)
source: thestate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gallup)
 
 
 
Smokers, you're probably being discriminated against because smoking is bad and you should feel bad for smoking
source: gallup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Man is threatening to divorce his wife because: a) she doesn't love him, b) she has a totally different personality from him, or c) she wants to stop working as a prostitute
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Research shows many Christians - Evangelical Protestants in particular - say porn is always immoral, but watch it anyway
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
5th Annual Farks In The Wild at the Buffalo Zoo. July 19, 6pm. LAST CALL
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Toronto condominium hotel joins the latest major trend in luxury accommodation: Removing Trump's name from your building
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Canada ends brief ban on wine from Israel after whine from Israel
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Cop who killed Australian yoga instructor shot her after being startled by a loud noise. I said, COP WHO KILLED AUSTRALIAN YOGA INSTRUCTOR SHOT HER AFTER BEING STARTLED BY A LOUD NOISE
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Hop-Con 5.0 at Stone Brewing - Liberty Station in San Diego, Wednesday, July 19th, 7pm (local time)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
Decades before Sully and his flying computer took a calculated dip in the Hudson, Al Haynes and his United crew saved 185 people, using nothing but spit and thrust changes to land a doomed DC-10. RIP to the 111 who died, 28 years ago today
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Belleville News-Democrat)
 
 
 
Illinois schools close for safety concerns... that snowflakes will stare at the sun during a solar eclipse
source: bnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
In yet another barbaric "honor" killing, Muslim father in Israel kills his daughter because she was dating a Christian boy and planned to convert. No, wait, strike that, reverse it
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue July 18, 2017
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Stupid reasons to divorce: #23 - Your spouse won't reply to your text messages
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Jehovah's Witnesses vow to appeal the Russian court ruling that keeps them banned by going to a European court. Because Putin will totally listen
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Who shows up on beaches on French northern shores? / SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS / Leading the people to shout, "Zut alors" / SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS / If puzzling mysteries appeal much to you / Then click on the link here and check out the view
source: thelocal.fr   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yakima Herald Republic)
 
 
 
Pro tip: Don't leave your cell phone and keys behind when robbing the Quick Stop
source: yakimaherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Seattle now offering a new bike stealing program after the failure of the previous one
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
City council: Oh, you want to put a Satanic monument next to the Christian one? Then, no. Nobody gets a monument
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop the greatest superhero of all time coming to the rescue
source: vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I know, it's hard to believe, but a toddler crawls around on the floor and eats stuff he or she ain't supposed to. Mum is amazed. Those darned toddlers
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hundreds of villagers band together to raise £275,000 to buy their local pub after developers threaten to turn it into new housing. That's the spirit
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Officer praised for buying a bike for a guy who'd had his stolen is arrested for taking cash from people he pulled over
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
♫♫ "Traveling through the town of Dundrum. A knife-welding man, he met a Muslim. He wanted to be stabby, he made him nervous, He calmed him down and made him breakfast" ♫ ♪
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
I don't know...Fart Taco is a pretty good name for your...oh wait
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Don't worry, it's legal because she didn't have a permit to operate
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Italian sausage raining from the sky might be weird to you, but in Fark's favorite state, it's just Tuesday
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Two people missing since 1942 have been found frozen in a glacier. Nick Fury and Phil Coulson on their way to investigate
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man and his magnificent hat
source: d6d2h4gfvy8t8.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dayton Daily News)
 
 
 
You really have to piss someone off for them to throw bed bugs into your house and light off fireworks under your car
source: daytondailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Activists decide best way to protect animal life is to release 30,000 predators next to a wildlife preservation area
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Charlotte men are stuck in a fashion time warp, dressing identically in blue shirts, black shoes, and khakis as if were still 1995 when Larry Johnson was the bee's knees
source: charlotteagenda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Just like running from bears, when running from an accident scene, you don't have to run fast - just faster than your six-year-old
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Goat: Fark this window. And fark this window and then fark this window in particular (w/video)
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Riots to ensue as Heinz launches a promotion for the unthinkable in Chicago: "Chicago Dog Sauce" which is KETCHUP ON A HOT DOG
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
"Jet-setting former Thai monk wanted on child sex charge being sent home" is not something you see every day, unless you're here. Welcome to Fark
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Miniature brains found at grave site from Spanish Civil War of 1936-1939. Verifies suspicions about Fascists and Communists that fought there
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fond du Lac Reporter)
 
 
 
Fark ready headline: "Police subdue naked man, accidentally light him on fire"
source: fdlreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Puts the lie to the "I was in the pool" excuse
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
Video
 
If you're doing a live news report, remember to stay away from the mimes. (with Not safe for work language)
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Saudi Arabia investigating the biggest threat to the country: A woman walking around town in a miniskirt
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Good dog jumps into water to save drowning fawn. "Storm just plunged into the water and started swimming out to the fawn, grabbed it by the neck, and started swimming to shore." No word if dog rewarded with venison steak. (with video)
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
CSX gets railroaded
source: buzz.blog.ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: The Doctor is a woman? Oh yeah, well so's your mom!
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Thieves take 40 kg of prize-winning Cheddar from cheese show. Wallace and Grommit sought for questioning
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rotten Tomatoes)
 
 
 
Christopher Nolan has his 100% rating on Rotten Tomatoes for his upcoming "Dunkirk" ruined by a critic from...CompuServe. Armond White nods approvingly
source: rottentomatoes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The State)
 
 
 
Too many of today's parents do everything for their children and shield them from learning life's hard lessons
source: thestate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this completely not creepy at all doll
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Pricipal. Caught sayof man that has stoped living. "See, told ya so" Was He jerking off or not. Reddit Says yes. Volcanologist looking for pyroclastic surge -OR- "hello, I am Pompeii Masturbator to salute and wait 1,938 years for eruption again" (Not safe for work)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Researchers announce breakthrough in curing MD paralysis in Jerry's Mice, meaning Jerry's Kids may be close behind
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
All hail the new overlord of the Independent Republic of Middlewatch - a pensioner pissed off about Brexit
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
A lot of people believe cops can get away with murder, especially when the victims are black. But apparently, shooting a teenager with an AR-15 while he's driving away from a noisy party (while your bodycam is recording) is going too far, even in Texas
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Webb fails to break Hoffa's hide and seek record
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
After battering Washington for the last six months, tropical storm Donnie heads for the Caribbean
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon July 17, 2017
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Hello... person. How are...things?
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Blue Whale suicide game takes another teen life. Sperm Whale suicide game may not be far behind, because, suicide and whales, amirite?
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
I'll be in my lab ... and vice versa
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Hello? Police? I'm a drug dealer, and some scumbag stole a bag of cocaine and some cash from my car. What state do I live in? Florida, of course
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New Ford Fusions in Ohio are discovered to be fully equipped with the spare marijuana
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Cosmo DiNardo, who confessed to killing 4 young men in PA last week, claims to have killed 2 other people in Philadelphia when he was 15
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSAW Wausau)
 
 
 
Man breaks into home, drinks brandy, eats muffins, then falls asleep naked in owner's bed. Meth: not even once
source: wsaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
NewsFlash
 
Stay safe, people of the north Pacific coasts, you've just had a massive 7.8 magnitude earthquake that has triggered tsunami warnings. Grab something that floats
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Babysitter arrested for breaking child's arm, hitting him with spatula for wetting his pants. On the bright side, at least she didn't break out the eggbeater and gravy boat
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop these boxers
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Fark Open House: Today's listing is a 7400sf, five-bedroom beauty with interior decor by a tea shop lady on acid (click through gallery for increasing insanity)
source: har.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you've ever wanted to piss on a Russian Typhoon-class submarine, here's your chance
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The biggest infrastructure problem in the US? Antarctica
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Man mistakenly claims autopilot made his Tesla tip over and sink into a swamp, thankfully he was rescued by Sir Lancelot and plans to try again
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Boat owners have the unusual obsession of using puns when naming their boats. Here's a collection of some of NJ's best and wurst
source: photos.nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Creationists mock flat-earthers as idiots, say Bible isn't to be taken literally
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
"Nathan is failing his Video Game Class. Please let him stay up all night to play games. Signed, The School." Seems legit
source: imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
The 'Game of Thrones' premiere just broke all of HBO's ratings records. Surely Ed Sheeran deserves the credit
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Scientists name new species of dinosaur after Canadian icon. Behold the Hortonosaurus
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Durango Herald)
 
 
 
Trucker looks outta the window, counts phone poles goin' by at the rate of four to the seventh power, puts two and two together, adds twelve and carries five; comes up with twenty-two thousand telephone poles an hour, spills 42K pounds of beer
source: durangoherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop these 'Murican skiers
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-07-09 to Sat 2017-07-15
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Elon Musk warns that artificial Intelligence is "the greatest risk we face as a civilization." Apparently 'someone' watched "The Terminator" a few too many times late at night
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Twin Cities' area police have escalated to shooting unarmed blonde yoga instructors
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
You too can own your own Scottish island with a six-bed lighthouse cottage with no neighbors for only £325,000. The only catch is a murder that happened there 57 years ago
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
You may wonder why jet fighter ejection seats are built to work even if the plane is still on the ground. Wonder no more
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
One of life's frustrations: having your bike stolen. One of life's great joys: stealing it back
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Her: "When you use [an] extension cord so you can plug your phone in while you're in the bath." Darwin: "You go, girl"
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Ladies and Gentlemen this is your captain speaking, I apologize for the two-hour delay but we are now on our way cruising at 36,000 feet and remarkably underweight. Oops that must mean we forgot the luggage
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Hamilton Journal-News)
 
 
 
Woman at mass shooting at gender-reveal party: I lost my baby. Police: No you didn't
source: journal-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Filing a false police report can result in jail time. Especially when you send fake texts that purport to be from some poor guy who didn't want to date you. Subby's just assuming
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? The porcupine has all the pricks on the outside. That, and they don't fall out of the sunroof while car surfing
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Has Supreme Court Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. embraced the court's same-sex marriage decision that he so passionately protested two years ago? Maybe he finally met the right person?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
SETI project says we've been searching for aliens all wrong, we need to looking for their frigging lasers
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
I see your great Springfield tire fire and raise you the underground fire of Clairton, Pennsylvania
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this elephant statue
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
American Airlines plane evacuated after passenger passes gas. Subby swears he wasn't in North Carolina today
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
There's something cool yet creepy when Garth Brooks offers to pay for your honeymoon
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
His parents said he just needed to sleep. Then things got stupid. And tragic
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
"As God is my witness, I thought cars could fly"
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
First the good news: There is an Eco-friendly way of eliminating ticks off your property. Now the bad news: It involves bringing opossum onto your property
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KCBY Coos Bay)
 
 
 
Truck Function in Junction, what's your function? "Getting caught on wires and shuttin' down the city"
source: kcby.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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