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Thu March 05, 2015
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Metro)
 
 
 
To all the Jewish Farkers; Happy Purim. To all the Gentile Farkers, Purim is the Jewish Holiday that is a cross between St. Patrick's day, Halloween, Mardi Gras, Thanksgiving, April Fools, and the Jewish tradition of tons of good food
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(4)
 
(Eater)
 
 
 
3 words: PEEPS FLAVORED MILK
source: eater.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(6)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
That awkward moment when the lab octopus you're taking pictures of snatches the camera out of your hands and starts taking pictures of you
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(3)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
DC Fox affiliate's perky blonde gun advocate/reporter may have exaggerated a *teeny-tiny* bit when she talked about fending off a home invader and 15 of his druggy, thuggy friends while unarmed
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(9)
 
(Plymouth Herald)
 
 
 
Council advertises general hand job, you up for it?
source: plymouthherald.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
It turns out companies who advertise cheap divorces over the internet might be as trustworthy as your no-good-for-nothing ex-husband
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Private schools do more harm than good; ergo, we should send children to public schools because at least they teach viable sexual education classes
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
"Hey pal get your own bridge to suicide on, I'm here first"
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Like a Good Neighbor, State Farm is There
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man arrested for simple battery after going up to random people, grabbing them and slapping them because...well, he doesn't need a reason other than Florida
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(9)
 
(The Journal (Ireland))
 
 
 
Mother's Day would not be the same if you didn't shop for gifts on Groupon. Please think of your Mom
source: thedailyedge.thejournal.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 
(Daily Telegraph)
 
 
 
Albert Einstein: "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the universe"
source: dailytelegraph.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Hi, this is Microsoft tech support. Your computer has been infected with a virus, and if you don't let me in to fix it, I'm going to send assassins from Canada to fix you
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 513: "Wallpaper This II" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 


Wed March 04, 2015
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
You can now buy ammo in vending machines in one state. Fark: Not Texas
source: controversialtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
What happens when a fighter pilot has diarrhea in the cockpit? Hint: It's a crappy day
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
England will be hotter than Athens, Corfu and Istanbul this weekend as global warming continues to not occur
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(The Federalist)
 
 
 
How does tech whiz Elon Musk's company Solar City make money? The old fashioned way - using prison labor at 93 cents an hour. That and government subsidies
source: thefederalist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: If flying cars were real
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Father of Jihadi John states that his son Jihadi John is not Jihadi John
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(KCTV5 Kansas City)
 
 
 
Make-A-Wish agrees to help build a playhouse for 6-year-old girl with cancer. HOA: Not so fast
source: kctv5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Quoting a politician in your second language Israeli difficult
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Fox News given new life: SEOULGHAZI
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
On second thought, maybe a 20-foot talking Christmas tree wasn't such a good use of taxpayer money
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
How #thedress and Grumpy Cat could be the next weapons in counter-terrorism
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
National Transportation Safety Board wants to take another look at "The Day the Music Died"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Man arrested for stealing two bicycles and a goat named Penelope
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Wine recommendation: Chardonnay? More like ChardonYAYYY. I'm drunk at work AND IT FEELS GREAT Pairs nicely with: Unemployment
source: obviousplant.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Ice crashes through car. No, subby didn't get that backwards
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
King County Metro Transit is looking to hire a "comfort station coordinator," which comes with an annual salary as high as $97,000, depending on experience. Duties? Find easily accessible restrooms for Seattle-area bus drivers
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ man sues after his fajita prayer is answered
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this lamp someplace interesting
source: mostic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Me too, buddy
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(WATE Knoxville)
 
 
 
Source of bad odor in Louisville discovered. Turns out it's Louisville
source: wate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
If you give a cow a cookie she'll crap all over your carpets
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
India bans documentary of rapist's confessions over fears of public disorder, suggests producers of the video should just lie back and think of India
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Boy, that escalated quickly... I mean, that really got out of hand fast
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Jesus Christ it's a lion, get out of the car
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Sometimes things in life are unexplainable. This is one of those times
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Why people are always trying to leave New Jersey, besides the obvious
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(WAVY Virginia)
 
 
 
When they say 'a church helps you talk to God' they don't mean 'so steal iPhones from it'
source: wavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Pulse (Nigeria))
 
 
 
Woman files for divorce citing irreconcilable manhood
source: pulse.ng   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Burlington Free Press)
 
 
 
Vermont town votes to retain historic ties to England
source: burlingtonfreepress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
How bad does the Dodge dealer have to be for Dodge to warn its customers about you?
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
"Prohibitions and fines do scarcely anything, so we decided to solve the problem our own way. Now, St. Pauli pees back"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
This week's word soup: HGTV torn asunder by controversy surrounding furniture plagiarism on Ellen Degeneres's reality show
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Looks like someone's in deep
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Apparently you can throw a bottle of urine out your dorm window at a woman and shoot her in the buttocks with a BB gun and not trigger a campus lockdown
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Japanese battleship Musashi spotted off of the Philippines. Carriers Essex and Lexington reported to be scrambling aircraft
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(272)
 
(CrimeFeed)
 
 
 
Ball Memorial. Hospital
source: crimefeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
Look, just because the Sheriff's Office posts your picture on Facebook doesn't mean you have to respond in the comments
source: 7online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Uh, when I said clean those fetuses I didn't mean take them to the laundry
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you meet your girlfriend in a McDonald's parking lot and her police officer husband shows up and beats you up?
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(113)
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Man dies while laying pipe
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
#WeaselPecker becomes online sensation, title of next Vivid video
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(PBS)
 
 
 
Smithsonian bans selfie sticks, says they ruin experience for other museumgoers just like tripods and monopods
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Nanny state tells woman who is fighting deportation to Africa because she is gay: "You can't be a heterosexual one day and a lesbian the next day. Just as you can't change your race"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
F-35 fighter so easy to fly, even a paralyzed women can fly one
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
How to get through a tough winter? New Hampshire police give out tickets for good behavior ... redeemable for free pizza and fries
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop Challenge: Improve this street art in progress
source: designerlife.la   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Two exotic dancers sue Tiffany's Cabaret claiming they were stripped of their wages. I can't wait to see the legal briefs
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Health officials, anyone else with an ounce of sense, perplexed by anti-vaxxers
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(281)
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
It doesn't matter how many people die in the streets after being caught up in the crossfire of Mexico's cartel wars: Americans will never stop going to Rocky Point for Spring Break
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
After successful reintroduction of measles, mother nature plans to go even more retro with a classic from the 14th century: The Plague
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(91)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Nepal asks that you stop leaving your Mount Everests on Mount Everest
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish Airlines A330 skidding off the runway in Nepal?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
New Hampshire restaurant gives birthday customers a percentage off their bill based on their age. 101-year-old man eats breakfast, gets a seven cent refund
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Dorky Dancing
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Eleven of the dumbest arguments against legalizing weed
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
700 koalas killed in attack by Australia's deadliest predator
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
In your latest update on the story that just won't die, survey shows the U.S. is evenly torn between thinking that dress is black and blue or white and gold
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
NYPD commissioner blames Colorado marijuana for increase in NY shootings
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(106)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Could have been worse. He could have found half a caterpillar
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
More and more Girl Scouts are learning about trust, security and how to file insurance claims as more and more thieves steal Girl Scout Cookies
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Why do men with girlfriends look at other women?" Wait, is this a trick question?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(157)
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Man found guilty of murdering a three-year-old who interrupted his Mortal Kombat game. FINISH HIM
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Having resolved all the major questions about life, the universe, and everything, scientists decipher why Indian food is so delicious
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(WRAL)
 
 
 
School boards declare war on Christianity in North Carolina by using Good Friday as a make-up day for the snowy Acts of God of the last two weeks
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
If you value your testicles, there are six things you should never say to a pregnant woman
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The FBI pulled off over three dozen raids on so-called "maternity hotels," which are designed to allow Chinese women to give birth in the US, providing them with passports, lodging, and food and allowing them to skip the hospital bill
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Keep sexing those chickens
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
How much oil is stored in the US? So much they're running out of room
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Knock, knock. Who's there? The history of knock knock jokes
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
As the bartender is my witness, I thought Guinness was good for my pregnancy
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(WTFark)
 
 
 
Talking dakimakura, which is Japanese for fake pillow girlfriend who giggles, squeals, and talks, which is more than you can say for your fake girlfriend from Niagara Falls
source: ora.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 

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