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Mon December 22, 2014
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Fark)
 
HOTY
 
Fark's 2014 Headline of the Year contest, Round 4: September through November
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(39)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Hey baby, on LinkedIn, I've been endorsed for my skills in Horizontal Directional Drilling and Tender Submissions
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man sends joke text to friend on jury duty at rape trial. Ha ha ha ha *CLANG*
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Crowd chants 'kill a cop' (once the Fox affiliate edits out a few syllables)
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Coed)
 
 
 
What the Elf on the Shelf does when no one is watching
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(29)
 
(The Journal (Ireland))
 
 
 
Filling out Secret Santa forms for an office worker can be quite stressful, unless you are this guy
source: thedailyedge.thejournal.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
World's most expensive Christmas tree worth every penny. Just kidding, it's as ugly as Santa's used underwear
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
PSA: When going target shooting later it's a good idea to leave your cache of weapons at home and not in your car, in the high school parking lot
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
In a simply amazing coincidence with absolutely no relationship to world events whatsoever, North Korea's internet is down. All of it
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(269)
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Don't mess with Mrs. Claus. Santa is packing heat
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(19)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: The White Elephant of the Internet
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(7)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Joran van der Sloot offered to tell Natalee Holloway's mom where the body is. For $250,000
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(56)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dash of color
source: trbimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
And you thought "Jerry Springer" was bad: Popular new Iraqi TV reality Show "in the Grip of the Law" Features former ISIS members being confronted by their victims
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Three-year-old girl discovers fairy doll has male genitalia. Ken seen sulking in corner
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Calls go out in New York for Racial Healing, Marvin Gaye's lesser-known single
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(71)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Airline barf bags disappearing as more fliers have the lasagna
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(46)
 
(BBC-US)
 
NewsFlash
 
Joe Cocker not feeling too good himself, reunites with John Belushi
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(246)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
In response to Taliban's mass killing of school kids, Pakistan announces it will execute 500 Taliban prisoners. That will surely put a stop to all the ongoing violence in Pakistan
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(222)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Judge will determine whether or not it's legal for churches and volunteers to feed the homeless. "It's insane to think it's come to this"
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(136)
 
(Hackney Gazette (UK))
 
 
 
"Stupid" thief tries to rob neighbors, is foiled by bowls of water left on the floor by the homeowner to deter burglars, then cops just follow his footprints back home. Seriously, calling this guy a thief is like calling Hani Hanjour a pilot
source: hackneygazette.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
New TLC Show: My Husband is NOT gay. Let us know how it works out for ya
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(221)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Seal found in a distressed state near Liverpool. Apparently still unable to get over the break up with Heidi Klum
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Headlines & Global News)
 
 
 
Deaths from car crashes down 25% in the past decade. However, it should be back up to its old levels in no time thanks to the introduction of texting
source: hngn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Michelangelo's David to get $300,000 in upgrades to protect it from earthquakes, including $12,000 worth of wang support
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Attention, women: It's okay to have a drink or two and then breastfeed your child; the so-called "pump and dump" is pretty much a waste
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(104)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
British underwear thief hides thousands of pairs in ceiling until the ceiling finally collapses. That's probably not Step 2
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Slow clap for gonorrhea rate decline, Christina Hendricks' boobies-Mad Men show, and Canadian physicists Drs. Terrance and Phillip discuss methane on Mars: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 12/14 - 12/20
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(9)
 
(Wausau Daily Herald)
 
 
 
"He told deputies after he was arrested that he went to the barn and performed oral sex on the horse"
source: wausaudailyherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Hackers have taken over South Korean nuclear plants, storylines from crappy '80s movies
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Argentine judge makes history - declares orangutan a "non-human person" and is entitled to all basic rights
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(67)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Nevada Senator proposes bill to allow dogs in bars. Your dog wants a vodak on the rocks
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(42)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
BBC reporter stands too close to burning opiates. Bad reporting. Good giggling (link replaced)
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(36)
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this blessing
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
You may get a better night's sleep if you live in a glass house. Just don't throw any stones
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Instead of being called brats, woman proposes that children born into military families who often have to relocate be called CHAMPS. "Child Heroes Attached to Military Personnel"
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
FBI says Best Korea© responsible for cyber attack. Lil' Kim denies it, but now is saying the U.S. helped Sony in the production of the film and if we retaliate they will "blow up our citadels"
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(154)
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
You may be the world's most productive sufferer of OCD if you take thousands of seeds and stitch them into a ghostly textile
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(28)
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Caption this camel
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(40)
 
(Big Think)
 
 
 
Hugs found to boost your immune system, probably because hugging people in winter is about as sanitary as cuddling up to a toilet in a gastro ward
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(30)
 
(Elite Daily)
 
 
 
Is working at a job you hate worse than being unemployed? Survey says ... yes
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(175)
 
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
Nothing to see here, just a thousand soldiers from the 82nd Airborne deploying to Iraq, move along
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(125)
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
Christians with a sense of humor have developed a Bible-themed set to counter Cards Against Humanity called "A Game for Good Christians." Cards include "What was Peter known to whip out his sword for" and "A fiery bush"
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(100)
 


Sun December 21, 2014
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Six people struck by lightning outside of Raymond James Stadium. Source of the lightning came from just down the road by Amalie Arena
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(53)
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop these stylin' Santas
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(11)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
New York Yankees, on the education costs of the children of murdered NYPD officer Rafael Ramos: We got this
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(150)
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Idiot found guilty of being one after calling emergency 999 number to report his friend had been shot in the chest and was dying. His "friend" in this case being a character in the GTA V game he was playing
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(62)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Study: Kids that eat fast food are more stupider than kids who don't
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
How to survive if the cable of the elevator you're in snaps, sending the car into free-fall. You don't already have a plan for this? How could you NOT? (video)
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(129)
 
(Vox)
 
 
 
Tipping perpetuates racism, classism, and poverty. Unless you tip the standard 25%, of course
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(209)
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Finally an ethical solution if you want to wear fur coats and wraps: Only make them out of roadkill
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(34)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Is your skin tingling? If you are a man, then you are probably talking to a fertile woman
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this...um...house?
source: ribalych.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Millennials love living in downtown areas of big cities, but they can't find good jobs close to home. Oh, the hipster struggle is real
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Not News: Pennsylvania arrests a dangerous dealer and plans on destroying his $160,000 stash. Fark: a man who offered to sell a few bottles of wine from his private expensive collection, without a liquor license in an 8-month sting operation
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(131)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
The winning $1 million recipe in the 47th Pillsbury Bake-Off contains only 4 ingredients
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(88)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
ISIS sets demands for them leaving Mosul. But they are totally not afraid of the Kurdish Peshmerga. They are just doing it to be nice
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(109)
 
(Patriot Ledger)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when your sister OD's so you rush her to the hospital but you crash and snakes crawl out of your arm and bite you and say you've shot up almost as much as her and shouldn't be driving and then they morph into police officers?
source: patriotledger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Durango Herald)
 
 
 
Colorado DOT removes wildlife speed enforcement zones because they didn't work. Since when is not working a reason to end a government program?
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(38)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Americans aren't getting married, and researchers think porn is part of the problem
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(255)
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Fire that gutted a town's city hall was "probably arson," what with the fact it destroyed all the city's financial records shortly before a mandatory state audit, claims Iowa's Chief Fire Investigator Ric Romero
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(19)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Another cop shot and killed. Authorities mum on details
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(140)
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Worst. Storage Wars. Ever
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(58)
 
(Daily Record (UK))
 
 
 
This shark fishermen does NOT need a bigger boat, he has done just fine with his record breaking catch
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(43)
 
(Clarion-Ledger)
 
 
 
Droopy poinsettias can be saved. This is not a euphemism
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(17)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Bitcoin pioneer getting two years in prison is a virtual reality
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(32)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Apparently, there were some researchers out there who actually thought cities had installed red light cameras for a purpose other than revenue collection
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(71)
 
(Time (Images))
 
 
 
Photoshop this badass
source: timedotcom.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Entertainment Tonight)
 
 
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Cool Story Bowlcut
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(119)
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Cleveland men's argument over their sexuality ends in a sword fight. Well, that clears up any confusion
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Couple moves into a serial killer's old digs and then bolts a life size replica of the murderess' likeness to the front of the house. Results are predictable
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(45)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
"Ask anyone born later than 1970 what they think of when they hear the name Richard Pryor and, unless they draw a complete blank, they'll gush over movies like "The Toy" or "Superman III," says columnist with no concept of reality
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(156)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
While everybody was watching Pahoa in Hawaii, lava snuck up and ate another town in Cape Verde
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(24)
 
(News 10 Albany)
 
 
 
High School senior wins fight to have photo of her with her rifle included in yearbook. Obviously, she's compensating for having a small penis
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(113)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN addresses the difficult questions. "Mom, why do your boobs hang?"
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(50)
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
JFK was so tough on the Soviets that he even went as far as to protect Santa Claus
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(14)
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Man forgets to blow out a candle in a room with a fish tank and you know what happens next
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(KJRH Tulsa)
 
 
 
Man runs stop sign, jumps a curb and blows a tire. He then walks away from the scene with his case of beer. Pretty impressive for a former police chief
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(26)
 
(My Fox Boston)
 
 
 
Woman: I won $10,000 on the lottery. Store clerk: Congrats. Here's your $930. Woman: What about the rest of the money? Store clerk: What money?
source: myfoxboston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour it's a very special Christmas edition of Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of live music from Juneau, Alaska, hosted by a farker
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(151)
 
(My Fox Boston)
 
 
 
Driver calls police, gets arrested on DUI charge after pants fall down
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(19)
 

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