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Wed May 27, 2015
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Robots developed that can rapidly adapt to major damage, say scientists completely unfamiliar with Terminators, Screamers, Replicators, Borg, Sentinels, Omnidroids, and the general concept of unstoppable robot killing machines
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Wonkette)
 
 
 
Strange, now that it's underwater, Texas not so scared of FEMA
source: wonkette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(141)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
What's a Grecian urn? Probably not enough to pay for this
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Über-trendy coffee bar
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
CSI: Cenozoic
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
We're now capable of making computer chips out of wood, which can only mean that computer science has become some manner of witchcraft
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
You know your rehab isn't going so well if your sober coach abruptly quits and leaves you in Mexico
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Pentagon "inadvertently" releases anthrax spores into Texas and California one month prior to Jade Helm
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Telegraph)
 
Facepalm
 
Breast cancer could be 'stopped in tracks by cheap drugs', in today's story you're not hearing much about on American news networks that run a lot of pharmaceutical ads
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Student suspended for sharing his ghost pepper with classmates. "I was told that it's equivalent to giving someone LSD"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(Havasu News)
 
 
 
Drone buzzing Memorial Day tourists in Lake Havasu City, Arizona, brought down by unmanned aerial T-shirt
source: havasunews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Two damn dirty apes have lawyered up and are in court applying for "personhood"
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Dan Savage wants to make Duggar the new Santorum: 'Clearly duggary needs to be a word'
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(160)
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high-up guy
source: images.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Blackmore Vale Magazine)
 
 
 
"He will be sadly missed, both for his propensity to consume stale bread and cake, along with his ability to toss upstart young moorhens all over the place." Somerset village to hold funeral for popular local duck
source: blackmorevale.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Judge who used Facebook to deride criminals in her courtroom resigns
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
It's so damn hot in India that the roads are melting
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Seagull photobombs precision flying team at Wales air show
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
"Its okay now. Both engines seem to be back on now. Feel free to move about the cabin, change your shorts"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
This is an Air France Boeing 777 with 37 people on board please divert your course now. This is a volcano, your call
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
If flooding and washed out homes and roads wasn't enough now Texans are having to deal with floating balls of AW HELL NO
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
India's tallest man (8ft 1in) tells what it's like to live the high life
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Do dogs like cats or do cats just hate dogs?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
World Trade Center's observation deck opens. It's a towering 360 degree view of NYC
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Finally, an article that leads with a question that can be answered YES
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(WLKY Louisville)
 
 
 
Take my last BBQ rib? Fork you
source: wlky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Here are photos of the arrested FIFA officials, a dream team of subjects for caricature artists, photoshoppers and captioners
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Pilot of MH370 was on his way to buzz the tower at Diego Garcia when plane went missing
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Moron.com)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for biting off pit bull's testicles. Not sure who's the victim here. Also not sure if this mug shot is the woman or the pit bull
source: moron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Man missing for 23 years found submerged in Citation. Please
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Leading environmental scientists develop plan to solve California's drought crisis: tax organic farm products, which are less efficient than non-organics, to drive down demand and improve efficiency. CHECKMATE, HIPPIES
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(CNN)
 
Facepalm
 
China says it is the rightful owner of the South China Sea and all its land because it wants it and always has. In other news, subby owns Jessica Alba and the Pacific Ocean which will now be referred to as "Duke Sucks Ocean"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: "Drunken kilted carjacker detained"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
Auckland, NZ police searching for a man trying to be Superman with a speeding locomotive, say he left shoe marks on engine before running away
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Ron Jeremy caught standing naked on a billboard. (Possibly not safe for work)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Idaho man survives direct lightning strike to the head which shredded the clothes off his body
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Homeless man arrested for panhandling and urinating in public. Cops put his photo on Facebook along with helpful announcement that since he had $800 in cash on him he doesn't really need your money anymore, kthxbye
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(Internet Archive)
 
Awkward
 
Duggar cached website: "Rape and incest represent heinous crimes and as such should be treated as capital crimes"
source: web.archive.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(333)
 
(STV.tv)
 
 
 
"Wreckage found after sailor goes missing in boat made of car parts"
source: news.stv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Colonial Williamsburg to offer live fire musket range for tourists to experience the Second Amendment the way our founding fathers did
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Hartford Courant)
 
 
 
♫ Life is like a hurricane here in Hartford. Race cars, lasers, aeroplanes, it's a duck-blur. Might solve a murder mystery ♫
source: courant.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Cute: Your dog races your car down the driveway. Awesome: Dolphins surf the bow wave in front of the nuclear submarine you're testing
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Gizmodo UK)
 
 
 
Meet Charlie, the Web's newest urban legend. You can summon him and stuff
source: gizmodo.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(127)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Why you shouldn't enter your PIN without checking the amount on your bill: it could cost you in £223,000 for six beers
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)
 
 
 
Texas earthen dam failure damn "imminent". Link goes to live feed(Update: officials now say dam will hold)
source: dfw.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(474)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Suspicions were first raised about Boyd Holder, a pastor in Tennessee, USA, when he was caught by local police allegedly having sex with a man in a van belonging to the Victory Apostolic Church where he worked"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
• Illusion of understanding • Illusion of control • Not News • Fark.ppt
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Scientists fight fire with fire - use herpes virus to successfully treat cancer. "About 10 per cent of the patients treated experienced a complete remission"
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Quincy Herald-Whig)
 
 
 
Unless you have some time to kill, don't ask this Illinois couple to show you pictures of their grandchildren. They just had their 100th. "There's always room for one more"
source: whig.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(The Tab (UK))
 
 
 
"Baffled police say it's the first time they've ever had someone steal a steering wheel"
source: bath.tab.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop what really has the fans scared
source: media4.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
3rd Annual Farks In The Wild at the Buffalo Zoo. July 22, 6pm. Tour Update
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Slate)
 
Awkward
 
"Dear Prudence: My mother-in-law acts like she's the mother to my kids. She wrote a story for my daughter where a girl's parents died and she went to live with the grandparents and said it was a happy ending. Should I fear for my life?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Ruh Rho
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(CBS Baltimore)
 
 
 
29 shot, 9 dead in Ballujah over the Memorial Day weekend
source: baltimore.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(Standard Digital (Kenya))
 
Awkward
 
Well this is awkward: Kenyan lawyer wants to trade Malia Obama for 50 cows, 70 sheep and 30 goats during the President's summer visit. (From the comments: "Imagine how many Cherutos you can get with that type of dowry")
source: standardmedia.co.ke   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(The Cannabist)
 
 
 
Pot-friendly hotel finally opens in downtown Denver: "Other hotels will fine you crazy amounts and kick you out. I've been kicked out of a hotel for smoking pot, it was a few years back, but that's the kind of stuff that won't happen in our hotel"
source: thecannabist.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(When On Earth)
 
 
 
Spain's massive human tower competition puts the USC's cheer squad to shame
source: whenonearth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(WFAA Fort Worth)
 
 
 
Texas legislators feverishly working to ensure women of all incomes have access to cervical and breast cancer screenings. Oh wait, scratch that, reverse it. They're gutting all state funds because fark poor women, that's why
source: wfaa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Texas floods were powerful enough to raise the dead
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
Creepy
 
Meet the newest "Human Barbie." She's a 26-year-old Russian hottie whose parents choose her clothes and refuse to let her date, but they totally approve of her raunchy photos. She's never even had a boyfriend (w/pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(SFBay.ca)
 
 
 
Life-size bronze Jesus Christ vanishes off church cross
source: sfbay.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
A rookie mistake many first time drug dealers make is arranging sales via Craigslist (Bonus: This is your mugshot .... ON WEED)
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Paula Cooper, the youngest person on Death Row, is no longer so
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Herald Scotland)
 
 
 
When Scotland passes better education policy it's time to admit Fark needs a Texas tag too
source: heraldscotland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Bad day: You crash into a fire hydrant and the water opens up a hole in the road. You go to inspect the damage and get locked out of your truck so you have to kick in the back window. Then you try to drive away and fall into the hole
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(9)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
You know you're smug when people can literally smell the happiness wafting off from you
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(9)
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
Students release ladybugs into their school- 72,000 of them to be exact
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Teacher has sex with twelve year old, is acquitted of rape charges, and wants to teach again. Why yes, it was a female teacher because a guy would've been convicted
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Cleveland police to stop hitting people on heads with guns, will just go back to using bullets
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Forget karaoke, darts, trivia nights, British pubs find a more realistic way to draw patrons (Not safe for work)
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
U.S. kicks preemptive goal against FIFA
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(449)
 
(KOCO Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
According to the report, as police were removing him from the plane, he was yelling, "Y'all are dicks"
source: koco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 


Tue May 26, 2015
(CNBC)
 
 
 
You can sleep tight knowing that the IRS is so secure that only 100,000 records were stolen in the latest hack
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
This handy new calculator shows how much you could have made if you'd invested in the stock market instead of paying for your wedding
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Man and his best friend decide to test a bulletproof vest. Since you're reading this on Fark, you know how it ends
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
What everybody seems to be forgetting is that Australia never gets cold enough for the Gorillas to freeze to death
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Marine who fought in Iwo Jima gets back a Japanese regiment flag he captured in the battle. Bonus: Subby's first kiss was with his granddaughter
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
"Officer I will even lick your butt hole"
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this volcanic reflection
source: media1.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: A mystery wrapped in a riddle wrapped in bacon
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Fox News)
 
Murica
 
Marine court-martialed for defending God... and disobeying a series of lawful orders
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(291)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Hundreds of TSA badges missing at airport, authorities worried people may impersonate incompetence and groping
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Popular televangelist says that if a man masturbates, his hand will be pregnant in the afterlife
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(236)
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
The gun grabbing has begun. Target: Ohio
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Ladyfinger excitement gets Italian town in a creamy lather
source: thelocal.it   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Why do people waste so much time at the office? Well, for one thing, that poo on the politics tab isn't going to fling itself
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Man asks city to ban fart smells
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop what Fearless Leader is looking at
source: media3.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Idaho Statesman)
 
 
 
Not news: Summer break has begun and college students have left town. Fark: And left behind their cats, dogs and snakes. Probably took their IPAs though
source: idahostatesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(212)
 
(The National)
 
 
 
Only in the UAE: Stray animals to wear glow-in-the-dark vests to prevent road accidents at night
source: thenational.ae   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Fantasy Movie League)
 
 
 
New fantasy league opens. And of course, all the stars are a bunch of gussied-up primadonnas
source: fantasymovieleague.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(SacBee)
 
 
 
The latest "retro" hipster music-listening trend? Cassette tapes. Apparently because any medium that isn't bulky, unreliable, obsolete, prone to breakage, and sounds like utter shiat is too mainstream
source: sacbee.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(271)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Putin's rising protégé: "They will put us on a sanctions list - but tanks do not need visas"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(206)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
What might a person be like if they hadn't spent 25 years having their head filled with garbage from the media and Hollywood?
source: latino.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Germany's bathroom thief strikes again as intelligence ministry's toilet seats go missing. Investigators say they have nothing to go on
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
What do you call it when an elephant grabs your GoPro and takes your picture? An elphie, of course
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
We're live on air here and later we'll be clubbing a small animal to death with a bicycle pump. Here's Sofia with the weather
source: thelocal.dk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Five Thirty-Eight)
 
 
 
FiveThirtyEight asks the relevant political questions of our time, such as "Why does the oldest person in the world keep dying?"
source: fivethirtyeight.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
It's almost as if those climatologists predicting stronger storms and unusual weather patterns as a result of global warming may have been on to something. Either that, or God really, really hates Texas
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(338)
 
(Portadown Times)
 
 
 
Drunken woman told police 'man dropped from the sky and drove car'
source: portadowntimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Turkmenistan's leader, infamous for falling off a horse, unveils a giant statue of himself riding a horse
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Real Clear Science)
 
 
 
"We don't have a federal porn tax. Thus, we could say that the American government has issued a federal porn subsidy"
source: realclearscience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(218)
 
(Austin Statesman)
 
 
 
Texas Farkers, check in & let us know you're okay
source: statesman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy politician
source: imgick.pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
This guy rode his favorite roller coaster for the 5,000th time in his life, including riding 95 times in a single day in honor of the roller coaster's 95th birthday
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
Man forces his mom out of the car in the middle of the interstate because he felt she was driving too slowly to their destination. Then things escalate
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Passenger: Excuse me, but the plane window just fell off. Flight attendant: Oh don't worry. It's only a protection
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New 'Jesus Gym' lets you exercise by walking on water (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(WCVB Boston)
 
 
 
Driver attempts to take exit 9 3/4
source: wcvb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Japanese corporations beg their workers to take some vacation, dammit
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(78)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
PETA demands Britain's oldest pub change its name from Ye Olde Fighting Cocks to Ye Olde Clever Cocks to 'celebrate intelligent chickens'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Ken Ham has indisputable evidence that dinosaurs roamed with Adam and Eve
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(316)
 

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