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Wed May 24, 2017
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(WRAL)
 
 
 
Pro-Tip: 'I guess you're here about the opium,' should not be the first words out of your mouth when a sheriff knocks on your door
source: wral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Grandma flees hit-and-run, causes second accident down the road, tells officers she drank half a pint of vodka, oh and those are her grandchildren in the back seat
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
That is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this woman from another time
source: d6d2h4gfvy8t8.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
New York businesses are providing Plan B to their employees to address commuter problems by aborting the drivers of the future
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
If some stranger from the internet wants to buy your used iPhone for $450 but only has $500 in $100 bills and needs change, maybe look at the bills he's giving you before you give him the money and phone
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Move over China, India is number one in total human population now
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KUTV Utah)
 
 
 
Woman knew something was fishy when her neighbor was hiding the founders of the Mormon Church in her garage
source: kutv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Three things are guaranteed to bring farkers together: cancer sucks, Dolly Parton is good and genuine and Mr. Rogers rocks. This link has one of those three
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Best yearbook photo ever
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
"Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia." -Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. Huh, maybe that's why everyone who reads my novel gets sick. THIS is your Fark Writer's Thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Dude tries to escape police by looking like a lady, but ends up looking like Steven Tyler instead
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
NJ activates emergency alert system, sends nuclear warnings to TVs -- by accident
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Woman stopped trying to bring a live monkey into court in her purse. Includes helpful photo of an x-ray view of a monkey in a purse
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
And Jesus said unto his disciples "Verily I say unto you, that a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven...unless you are offered a free Toyota Land Cruiser, then I say go for it"
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Sure, Trump may be an arrogant inexperienced blowhard bent on profiting from the presidency, but at least he "united the entire Muslim world" according to his administration
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
What is your best, one line advice?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Bay Area Fark Party - Oakland Beer Trail
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Porn and speed dating are the key to survival
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Do do do do do do do do d oOOOH OH OH OH GOD YES YES YES NOKIA RINGTONE (page might be not safe for work)
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this simple coffeepot
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Man run over by tractor in LaGrange. Police want to know a-how how how how such a thing could happen
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
At Buckingham Palace, the Changing of the Guard ceremony was cancelled over security concerns. So... those guys just have to stay out there then?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
United's PR is now on fire
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Some reporter just went to Walmart for the first time
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Re/code)
 
 
 
It's not spam, it's not robocalls - it's ringless voicemail and the GOP's FCC wants to make it legal
source: recode.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Four hikers set new record by dying in Everest's highest camp
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal Times)
 
 
 
Visit beautiful Juneau, Alaska.... find random body parts
source: journaltimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Stale french fries? That's a gas, gas, gas
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Heat Street)
 
 
 
"So to recap, a couple of white ladies learned to make burritos good while on vacation and now they are literally comparable to Hernán Cortés"
source: heatst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue May 23, 2017
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Truck plows into Delaware company AnalTech, releases odor ...obviously
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Firefighters rescue ducklings that were swept down a storm drain. And by 'ducklings', I mean big, burly construction workers
source: dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Two men with dreadlocks, one wearing a Jamaican beanie, are wanted for attempting to rob a marijuana dispensary
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Woman, 43, arrested for "passionately kissing" 14-year-old. And she's not even a teacher (with mugshot)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deviant Art)
 
 
 
Photoshop this peaking gator
source: orig07.deviantart.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Star Wars)
 
 
 
Vanity Fair Star Wars covers indicate how the protagonists will split the party for The Last Jedi
source: starwars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inquirer Philippines)
 
NewsFlash
 
ISIS-linked fighters have taken over a city in the Philippines. President Duterte declares martial law
source: newsinfo.inquirer.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Shut down the circus and the next thing you know clowns with bladed gloves are slashing folks in front of a taco joint
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
This day in 1934, Bonnie and Clyde shot to death in stolen Ford, proving once again it pays to take the rental car insurance
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Awkward is that time the TSA found your 3-D printed mouse penis
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
God removed from $1.3M mansion purchased for her by angels, put into jail by police. Well, I guess we see whose side the cops are on
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
Nothing says Happy Birthday like celebratory gunfire outside the Chuck E Cheese
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
If you've been feeding the growing army of mangy Florida raccoons, the police would like you to knock it off
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
Murder suspect who used big-penis defense found not guilty. Judge immediately issues gag order
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Nobody panic. The peach still looks like a butt
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Haaretz)
 
 
 
Trump backed out of talking to Israeli Knesset over fear of heckling, what a sad sad snowflake
source: haaretz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Trump Swatted for Second Time
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Good news, everybody. CEO pay is rising again -- they got an average 8.5 percent raise last year. Let's all pull a little harder and sacrifice a little more, and maybe we can get that number into the double digits this year. COME ON, WE CAN DO IT
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Two dead in Riverdale shooting. Suspect seen fleeing scene wearing crown, dropping burgers
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Sir Roger Moore is off to that Casino Royale in the sky
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Data breach releases names of 16,000 Florida concealed weapon carriers, giving hackers a list of people to back slowly away from and leave the hell alone
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
Iowa businessman discovers "Conservative Humor" is a lousy legal defense
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Providence Journal)
 
 
 
Rhode Island finds locked vault in state house. Could contain old records or faceless horror
source: providencejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC4i)
 
 
 
Man captures terrifying footage of massive spider carrying mouse up a fridge. Naturally, being Australia, they have adopted it as a pet
source: nbc4i.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
While it's cool to find a few bucks under a couch cushion, woman discovers that her 30-year-old flea market ring is a 26-carat diamond worth $455,000
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Trump meets Abbas, confuses everyone by saying his favorite song by him was Fernando
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Evidently, Maine is home to the world's largest outlaw hovercraft gang
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
A look at what George Orwell got right and wrong about the future we live in
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jerusalem Post)
 
 
 
Islamic State group 'claims the Manchester attack'
source: jpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
The Guardian spends a month with chemtrails conspiracy theorists from California and surprisingly comes out of it in OK condition
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
I have no idea what you're talking about, so here's a whale blowing a rainbow out of its blowhole
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this dapper young man
source: lsquaredstyle.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Space.com)
 
 
 
Let's hope it was mouse sperm
source: space.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
If you try to be a practicing vegetarian but occasionally slip up and eat bacon, it's okay. However moving forward you should probably just call yourself a reducetarian
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Don't judge a book by its cover - especially when that book is face down
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
The first American serial killer may have felt remorse for his crimes, after all
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
You are one wild and crazy guy if you get shot in the head with an arrow and are still able to drive yourself home six miles away
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Four baby squirrels needed to be rescued after their tails all got tangled together. That's nuts
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
This happened in Colorado, so clearly Lucifer's Lettuce has claimed another victim
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Biloxi Sun Herald)
 
 
 
Man and two women arrested for having sex on the deck of the Triple D Bar "right there, in the middle of the day, in broad daylight. In front of God and everybody"
source: sunherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
Weather man to climate change deniers - "Submit your evidence to peer reviewed journals or stfu"
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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