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Fri September 19, 2014
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
White House evacuated
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Photobucket)
 
 
 
This futuristic World's Fair concourse needs some futuristic Photoshop help
source: img.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark Around The World: EuroFark 2014 - Oct 3-5 - Prague, Czech Republic
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Fark)
 
Plug
 
Totalfark: Where every thread eventually becomes a food thread. Even sex threads. Especially sex threads
 
 
(US Food and Drug Administration)
 
 
 
If you've been struggling to find one very good reason not to eat an uneviscerated dried roach, you're in luck
source: fda.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Ever wonder why Hollywood is out of ideas? Apparently, they shipped all the weird ideas off to Bollywood
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Never forget to take the commemorative 9/11 shell casing out of your pocket. Here's why
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Man dies performing CPR on his wife. You're doing it wrong
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Woman left brain-dead after colliding with a brain dead moron who was barreling through Central Park on his $4,000 racing bike
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Ma'am I'm sorry that your 12-year-old daughter is suffering a seizure, but this damn bus has a schedule to keep
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
If you're a cyclist and encounter a wedding limo parked in the bike lane, you could just ride around it. Or you could create a scene that ends with you getting your ass kicked by the wedding party
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Some Islamic asshats beheaded a few people recently, so clearly you can see why people were outraged that Busch Gardens had the unmitigated gall to include severed heads in its Halloween display
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Canoe)
 
 
 
And in Canada, the current score is Black Bears 1, Hunters 0
source: cnews.canoe.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
When you're caught with a shrimp wheel and a pork loin in your jacket and the cop chasing you had to dodge the hotdogs being ejected from your pants, there is a good bet your appeal for lack of evidence to convict will get chuckled out of a courtroom
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not News: Unpopular girl subjected to cruel "homecoming queen prank." Amazing: The real homecoming queen gives her crown away to the girl in front of everyone. Damn dusty here
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(WZZM 13 Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
100-year-old woman training for her first, last 5k walk
source: wzzm13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2)
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
Taco Bell's parent company just opened a Vietnamese restaurant with a communist star logo. Well, five points for effort
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Pravda)
 
 
 
In Russia, cats become fire-breathing dragons and dogs turn into cute four-legged bumblebees
source: english.pravda.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Western Daily Press (UK))
 
 
 
Man dubbed "Britain's most prolific shoplifter" jailed for 341st time. Note that he was not called "Britain's most proficient shoplifter" (pic)
source: westerndailypress.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Great news: Obamacare website now mostly secure
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
The Archbishop of Canterbury has doubts about the existence of God
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(110)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cliff path
source: osiny.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
If you are a town official and are going to be filmed somewhere, make sure it is not a room full of Nazi stuff
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
This year: 'Save the cougars of L.A." Next year: 'Kill the murdering, mountain lions that ate my baby'
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Because it's Friday, you're bored, and nobody is responding to that damn email you sent two hours ago: The Fark Weird News Quiz. The quiz more doctors recommend for their patients with unusual swelling
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(My High Plains)
 
 
 
Man takes 1d8 damage from short spear while attempting to burgle the home of a medieval weapons enthusiast
source: myhighplains.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Queens man posts pornographic photos in his windows, insists "I'm drying them out, they got damp last night"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(WMC 5 Memphis)
 
 
 
For some odd reason, parents want to know how a woman wielding a baseball bat got into their children's school unnoticed. The fact that she was wearing only underwear notwithstanding
source: wmcactionnews5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(WREG Memphis)
 
 
 
Suspect in PA state trooper shooting makes FBI most wanted list, claimed to have fought with Serbians in Africa. You remember when Serbia was at war in Africa, right?
source: wreg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
France fires the first shots in war. This is not a repeat from Waterloo or Dien Bien Phu
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Sharon Herald)
 
 
 
Domestic dispute results in a bull getting kicked over a fence by an angry, pregnant buffalo
source: sharonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Want to attend a public university? You may be forced to do a sex quiz, which is not nearly as fun as a Fark Quiz but is also less likely to result in a social disease
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
Sometimes you just want to get away from it all when you want to have your drink... like way up on a giant ferris wheel
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Smoke-filled passenger jet just barely escapes being the latest obsession of the Missing Plane Network
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Keanu Reeves discovers intruder sitting in his library, who told him she "just wanted to meet him." In other news, Keanu Reeves has a library
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian Navy announces plans to retire four aging and obsolete ships, bringing the size of its navy down to -4
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Here are the fifteen toys your children will demand from Santa Claus or Hanukkah Harry this Christmas because the media tells them so
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(MK Web)
 
 
 
Parents persuaded by council not to name their newborn baby after a transport company
source: mkweb.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If you're going to start a family business and expand to eight locations, try to not have them all be in New Jersey. Also, try to not have them all be brothels. Just saying
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Six Iranians sentenced to one year in prison and 91 lashes for dancing to Pharrell Williams' song Happy. I don't know about you but that sounds right to me
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Looks like citizens of Washington DC have been listening to a lot of Cypress Hill lately
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Lowering the Bar)
 
 
 
Kansas lawyer incompetently tries to convince Kansas Supreme Court that he is incompetent, succeeds anyway
source: loweringthebar.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Average American waistline is now 39 inches, or more than a yard. Rear ends still as big as a house
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(170)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
If you have already lost one leg, why not just lop off the other one so you can run faster?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
How State Police detect drugged drivers: Weaving. Stupid human tricks. Cheek swabs
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Chris Christie defends mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, bull dykes, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shiat-kickers, and Methodists
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Mary_and ma_h _eacher _ins one mi_ _ion do_ _ars on _hee_ of For_une
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
TV news anchor who was fired after referring to Chinese President Xi Jinping as 'Eleven' Jinping, is told to reapply for his job in VIII years
source: af.reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
If the police are willing to cut you some slack and call your mom to come pick up your drunk, sorry ass, just get in the car
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
A LA attorney faces a possible six-month suspension for posting more than 50 photoshopped pics on her firm's website that portray her mingling with big-time celebrities. Subby's seen quite a few shops. I can tell by the pixels that they're fake
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Reasons to conduct a SWAT raid: 1) Hostage situation with armed, delusional man, 2) Drug processing warehouse filled with armed criminals, 3) To make sure the local barbers all have their licenses up-to-date
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Cryptozoology News)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Bigfoot caught on camera. New hotness: Dwarf Bigfoot with Predator's cloaking-like ability caught on camera (w/video)
source: cryptozoologynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Are older women really better in bed? Smoking hot Sexpert Tracey Cox says YES, YES, YES
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Former babysitter of the year candidate who was sentenced to 15 years in prison for leaving a 9-month-old boy in the bathtub unsupervised for an hour while she checked Facebook is demanding a new trial because she's deaf
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Men fear to tread the Korean Demilitarized Zone, which makes it one of the safest locations for wildlife anywhere in the world
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Because sex
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(163)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Man's stolen Jaguar miraculously found ... after 46 years
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
So apparently it's illegal to spank Miley Cyrus with a Mexican flag
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
People who were spanked as children say the punishment made them better people in a vain attempt to justify being abusive assholes
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(291)
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
When your son comes to you to talk about having suicidal thoughts there are many ways to handle it. Handing him your .45 caliber gun and telling him "Do it. Kill yourself. I don't really care" is not one of those ways
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Today is Talk Like a Pirate Day. Once again, it's time to practice your "Arrr"s
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this steak-lover
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Kim Jong Un in poor health as his weight has ballooned thanks to an obsession with cheese
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(136)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Back in the day when a father caught their son smoking cigarettes they would force them to smoke the whole pack to teach them a lesson. Apparently that is frowned upon now, especially if it's vodka instead of cigarettes
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
The first Australian in Perth to buy an iPhone 6 promptly becomes the first person in Perth to drop the iPhone 6. Bonus: On live TV
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
'Three Cups of Tea' guy plans 'reluctant' return to public speaking circuit, hopes people have gotten over the whole 'Your books on Afghanistan were a complete lie and you stole from the charity you set up" stuff by now
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Are you a Debbie downer, negative Nancy or pessimistic Pete? Well look at the bright side, it's all about a chemical imbalance in a small part of your brain that doesn't think you will do anything meaningful with your life, unlike your sister
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Crossing guard fails to look both ways before running across the street. If only there was a crossing guard for the crossing guard. (W/video)
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British Airways: Where our pilots are barely old enough to get a drink at the lounge when they land at JFK
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
DC Farkers: Let's get everyone's favorite penguin scientist drunk before we have to dump him on his flight home. 3:30PM this Friday, 9/19 @ Gordon Biersch on F St
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
World's biggest onion brings tears of joy to its gardener
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(7 Deadly)
 
 
 
Bartender writes an epic rant in response to hedge-fund douchebag who groped her
source: 7deadlymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(330)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Thai prime minister apologizes for implying that criminals do not murder ugly women
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
First Scottish Referendum results are coming out. UPDATE: It's official. Scotland votes NAE
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(324)
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
School administrators use 14 year old girl as rape bait in sting. Then forget to show up to stop the crime
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(234)
 


Thu September 18, 2014
(Daily Dot)
 
 
 
If you're confused about the Scottish independence referendum, let Fark's favorite animators explain it to you. Even if it doesn't clear the issues up for you, it will make you giggle
source: dailydot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Villagers attack and kidnap Guinea's Ebola health team. You are not helping
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(209)
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Tired of its image as a store full of shirtless, unshaven, butt-cracked, back-titted, mullet-topped shoppers, Walmart looks to boost its image by hosting cockfighting in the store
source: businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Apparently falling off a 100ft cliff can really make you hungry
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(My Fox Detroit)
 
 
 
He who lives by the flamethrower shall . . . crap, I'm on fire
source: myfoxdetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Botto Bistro has one goal: To become the most hated restaurant on Yelp
source: insidescoopsf.sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Proving that not all teens are beer-drinking hellraisers, a high school senior is raising funds for protective K9 vests
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
Sky Harbor Airport closed as gunman is on the loose. What a pisser
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Time to reset the mass shooting clock again
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(434)
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Grey Is The New Orange: elderly prison population confused by modern world upon parole
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Thousands respond after car thief in L.A. police chase runs down Gordo The Dog on live tv
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(The Gazette)
 
 
 
Archeologists discover 14 beer caves outside of Cedar Rapids described as "impossibly dangerous" to explore
source: thegazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these children at a water fountain
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(OC Weekly)
 
 
 
The 10 most important tacos in the history of tacos
source: blogs.ocweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Father of mass murderer Anders Breivik wrote book about how extreme and dangerous his son is. Gee, thanks for the warning
source: thelocal.no   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Spanking is something you should only do to your consensual sex partner or the prostitute to whom you've paid extra
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(248)
 
(My Fox Detroit)
 
 
 
Free Cat
source: myfoxdetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(News9 Oklahoma)
 
 
 
Fringed surrey sales soar as Oklahoma IDs will no longer be valid for air travel in '16
source: news9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
Nebraska jail guard caught stealing Lego told to hit the bricks
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
In the name of great justice, US military ready to launch all Zig
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Rugged individualist Cliven Bundy, who is being sued by a woman whose car collided with one of his cows that wandered onto the interstate, says it's the STATE'S job to keep the fences repaired on the land he illegally grazes his cows on
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(172)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
You Catholic school kids who had nothing to do with the gay hate crime beating in Philly can leave now. Not so fast, "coach"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Aspiring chef arrested after she posted her one-pot cooking method to Facebook
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Descrier)
 
 
 
New Islamic State propaganda video showing British journalist John Cantlie released. No, just the video was released. He's still screwed
source: descrier.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Epicurious)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: When it's time to put a special breakfast on the table, what do you put together? French omelet? Homemade biscuits and gravy? From comfort food to showing off, breakfast is a meal we can all do well if you'll chip in some good ideas
source: epicurious.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Everybody get out your sad trombones: America's Toughest Sheriff, Joe Arpaio, is being forced to return all the military-grade hardware, including guns, tanks, and helicopters, that he received through the Defense Department's Excess Property Program
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(CNBC)
 
NewsFlash
 
DELETE FROM tblOracleEmployees WHERE strName = 'Larry Ellison' AND strJobTitle ' = 'CEO';
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 
(Ottawa Sun)
 
 
 
Firefighter under fire from firefighters' union for fighting fires for free
source: ottawasun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
Just so we're all on the same page, if you're the school bus driver and a sick student asks you to pull over so he can get out and vomit, don't leave him in a stranger's driveway while he's vomiting
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Czechoslovak depeniser back in California to stand trial after burglary scheme goes off half-cocked
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
Farmers in Arizona are confused but happy over these strange orbs of liquid falling from the sky in large quantities
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Know Your Meme)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: What internet memes do while on vacation
source: knowyourmeme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Deputy fire chief places his bid to be drafted into the NFL. FARK: His home also houses Imagination Station, a child care center. Police said they removed several firearms from the home, including rifles, shotguns and handguns
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Kentucky white supremacist who's running for Senate is betting heavily that voters like slogans that rhyme: 'With Jews We Lose'
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(WVEC)
 
 
 
Please note: the US Army does not allow 'elfing' your ears
source: wvec.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Texas School Board votes to screw over all TX HS school students taking AP US History or Government by refusing to let teachers teach the test-based curriculum and instead insisting they use TX's new "America, fark yeah" history standards
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Game of Thrones author George R. R. Martin steps up to stump for the Democratic Party, leaving fourteen rising Democrats dead of various causes
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Two Siberian women killed when two tons of root vegetables fall on them in most Russian death imaginable
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(CSN Chicago)
 
 
 
Good: Cubs fan catches homerun ball. Bad: Loses wedding ring during celebration. Good: Grounds crew locates ring and returns it. Cubs players said they would have helped look but they have no idea what a ring is
source: csnchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Swiss News)
 
 
 
"EU disappointed in Iran." Hey man, we all thought Flock of Seagulls had more in them but sometimes you just get that one hit and that's it
source: swissinfo.ch   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
In one broad stroke, criminal mastermind tries to use his hoodie to steal artwork from gallery. This man is no Thomas Crown
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Missing American bachelorette party caught in Cabo during hurricane turns up in California. Hangover 4 just wrote itself
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Salt, the mineral most responsible for civilization, was good for you, then bad, then not so bad, then bad again, is now...not as bad as it was. For now
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
National leader makes statement all of us can agree with whole heartedly. Difficulty: It's the leader of Iran
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
U.S. household income rose $180 last year. Which means the average American is now making $180 a year
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(Hawaii News Now)
 
 
 
Rural Hawaii residents breathe sigh of relief as lava flow misses their neighborhood on the outskirts of the town... that it's heading straight for the middle of. Dammit
source: hawaiinewsnow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
And the next king of Scotland is? WAT, the Duke of Bavaria?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(122)
 
(KJRH Tulsa)
 
 
 
Oklahoma City man arrested for washing himself in public fountain with mayonnaise. Well, they hope it was mayonnaise
source: kjrh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
If I'm reading this correctly, and I believe that I am, then Woody Harrelson is a monkey
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(26)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Let's get wasted while we're taking care of a busload of schoolkids What could possibly go wrong?
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Insurance industry kept awake nights during hurricane season due to the increasing likelihood of their worst nightmare: a $100 billion superstorm that could blow in any day EVERYBODY PANIC
source: dotearth.blogs.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(KSPR Springfield)
 
 
 
Student suspended until January after school officials found a notebook with details about a hit list and mass shootings. Did I say 'hit list' and 'mass shootings'? I meant cannibis
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(39)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
How to tell it might be a redneck wedding? It takes seven police departments to break up the brawl that ensues
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(48)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Dogs found to have mental abilities of five-month-old babies, although they think more about steak
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Bipartisan group of senators call for resignation of NFL pro football player; wait did I say 'NFL pro football player'? I meant federal judge accused of beating his wife in an Atlanta hotel room last month
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(35)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Police say a man used a banana to rob a store. This never would have happened if the cashier had a pointed stick or a 16-ton weight
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(41)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Poverty rate in the U.S. falls to 14.5%. The other 85.5% of Americans are still just a paycheck away
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(123)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
ISIS captures sixteen villages. Duchies, Hamlets on high alert
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(55)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: My eleven year-old daughter has discovered what I will euphemistically refer to as my 'back massager' and has gone...exploring. Is that wrong? Should I stop this? Do you still believe these questions are real?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(217)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flaming horseback rider
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(15)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Will Scotland do what William Wallace couldn't? Will Britain shuffle off this mortal coil and cease to be? Will the Scots save Scotland from the Scots because the Scots f*cked it bloody well up? This is your Scottish Independence Referendum Thread
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(935)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
You can now buy Ebola blood on the black market
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Irish paper covers Scotland's vote for independence from England live from the intertubes. Wales
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Would you like to know what foods are popular in which states, and only those states? I thought you would
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Despite what Fox News is always telling you, the United States is not even close to being the happiest country on the planet
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
This three-eyed calf is an incarnation of Shiva? HOLY COW
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(42)
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
There are now over a billion websites on the internet, some of which aren't porn
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(37)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
First thing to do after buying a new car? A) call your friends, B) proudly take a short drive, or C) take off that dealer license plate frame
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(199)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Six middle school children hospitalized after a classmate brings pills to show and tell
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(33)
 
(Death and Taxes Magazine)
 
 
 
Today's Mad Libs Headline: Couple's threesome with homeless man turns violent with hamburger meat
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(36)
 
(Air Force Times)
 
 
 
I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace where never lark nor even eagle flew-and, while with silent lifting mind I've trod the high untrespassed sanctity of space, put out my hand, and touched the face of
source: airforcetimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
The only problem using drum circles to treat troubled teenagers, is that they sound a lot cooler when you're high
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 489: "Challenge Accepted". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 

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