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Tue August 20, 2019
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Okay poop coming out of bride's wedding dress
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Did we land? Or, were we shot down?"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKOW Madison)
 
 
 
If your hotel room mattress has bed bugs on it, don't do what this guy did
source: wkow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed News)
 
 
 
Combining the power of two of the least trusted groups in America, what could go wrong? Turns out, pretty much what you expect
source: buzzfeednews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Owe $20? No school lunch for you. Come back, one month
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon August 19, 2019
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
You're farkin-A right it is
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 28 New York)
 
 
 
Because people are a**holes
source: wwnytv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 58 Milwaukee)
 
 
 
Dumbasses on rental scooters, Interstate 94 edition. Video goodness, too
source: cbs58.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
NASA preparing for 'Colossal God of Chaos' asteroid to arrive in next 10 years. Will be so close it may pass under TV satellites EVERYBODY PANIC (possible nsfw content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Yob tourists filmed 'surfing' on the back of an endangered whale shark in Mexico feel the wrath of the yob Internets
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKYC Cleveland)
 
 
 
Stupid: Blow torching weeds around your house. Facepalm: Burning your truck in the process. Dumbass: Along with three of your neighbors houses
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
The "Poppy Apocalypse" was bad enough; super bloom could fuel fall wild fire super-burn
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
China's paramilitary troops appear to be preparing for some kind of boogaloo
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
Ground control to major Tom
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Northwest)
 
 
 
Golf course demolition derby all the rage in the Pacific Northwest
source: mynorthwest.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Lizard the size of a dog attacks dog the size of a lizard. Old geezer bite-larity ensues (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Climate change is making spiders more aggressive, which is nice
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
What's all this about a sexy selfie subway shoot? Oh. It checks out. Carry on, Subway BAE
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FB Photos)
 
 
 
Photoshop these summer businessmen
source: scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
China' State Council calls for transforming the city of Shenzhen into basically a back-up Hong Kong, you know, in case something terrible should happen to the current one
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
A radioactive spider bite may not turn you into Spider-man, but your chances of becoming a 'super commuter' just went up 29% in Southern California. Unfortunately, your only super power is a three hour commute, so there's that
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
The Triple Play continues on Paul's Memory Bank, OTR edition (8PM EDT). "New" episodes of Stan Freberg, Superman and My Favorite Husband. Plus a status report, there's light at the end of the licensing tunnel
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WNKY.COM)
 
 
 
Citation: Naked man at shopping center shakes penis at woman, wanders nude into coin operated laundry
source: wnky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 17 Grand Rapids)
 
 
 
Two teens water-ski 62 miles across Lake Michigan from Wisconsin to Michigan, jumping over several freshwater sharks in the process
source: fox17online.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Because who wouldn't want three 12-year-olds for their birthday? 🤢⇨🤮⇨😠
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 San Francisco)
 
 
 
Male sex enthusiast provides free fitness training for local women, national publicity for taqueria, and series of challenges for police after being released from stay at Holiday Inn
source: abc7news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Looks like I'm going to have to rethink my vacation plans
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
God looks after drunks, small children, and the GoPro cameras of people who die going over waterfalls, at least according to Florida Man
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Deep Thoughts at 3AM: "You're gonna throw ME out of your restaurant? Well, I'll just make sure no one tries to park in there"
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Secret door discovered in haunted cinema that 'just so happens' to have been converted into ghost-hunters' tourist attraction. Handy (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
♪ Kinka Kinkajou, where are you? I've got to go to work now / Kinka Kinkajou, where are you, and please stop biting me, ow ♪
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Not news: hoarder. News: kept a hog in a basement in Detroit. Fark: probably didn't feed it dead prostitutes. Probably
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Will the Minnesota winter kill the scorpions or did that already fail to work?
source: cities971.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Jeffrey Epstein, who conveniently committed suicide, conveniently left a will, which he conveniently signed two days before he died. How convenient
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
It sort of a given that the words "horrifying discovery" will pop up in article about police raiding the home of an accused child molester; but usually not "mummified human remains and an altar to an unknown deity," -level horrifying
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Following Jeffrey Epstein suicide, Bureau of Prisons Director removed to make things look legit. All problems have been solved everyone
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Movie extras, cult TV, and a lot of food questions are all on the Fark Weird News Quiz August 11-17 Salamander Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
U.S. farmers, facing record number of acres not planted due to flooding, are stunned by WASDE reports forecasting huge corn harvests. Some are skeptical, others simply understand the supremacy of keyboard and mouse over a godless console controller
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this mosaic
source: hotelwelcomeparis.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Suddenly, groin blisters (warning: really gross photos of aforementioned groin blisters if you scroll down)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Brand Eating)
 
 
 
Benihana unveils its newest frozen dinner, the Steak Yakisoba. It's quite enjoyable, but if you must toss sharpened knives around to simulate the Benihana dining experience at home, please put on some pants
source: brandeating.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Bad: helicopter parents. Florida: helicopter birthday guests
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Norwegian Air pulls in emergency funding from stank bake sale. Hang on, flip that
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
Several mailboxes damaged across the county with fireworks. Those responsible were seen driving away in a dark colored Chevrolet pickup truck with loud exhaust. Police will begin searching somewhere in the mid 1950s for suspects
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Subway restaurant becomes subway tunnel
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The NY Times: bringing you the cultural history of fire hydrants in NYC
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
In move that will surely ruffle a few feathers, Turkey removes three top Kurdish mayors in major crackdown
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Computer simulation shows what would happen if a tsunami hit Washington State, as apparently it requires massive computing power to come up with the answer 'somewhat wetter than usual'
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC11 North Carolina)
 
 
 
You know it's a hot one when the city bus spontaneously catches fire and explodes
source: abc11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Bwoah...Finnish economist delivers outlook while riding in a rally car
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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