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Fri December 09, 2016
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Worldwide Interweb)
 
 
 
The 100 most unfortunate names in human history. It's great knowing we live in a world where Dr. James Grossweiner could one day marry a woman named Charity Beaver. Then they'd combine their last names into "Grossbeaver" for gender equality's sake
source: worldwideinterweb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this...car?
source: popmeh.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Fireball whiskey now comes in a box. These guys know exactly who they're selling to
source: munchies.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
Think John Glenn was a hero? Wait until you meet his wife, Annie (link fixed)
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Once upon a time, in a small village not too far from here, lived a small boy who took notes, did his homework, and scored 1089 on the Fark Weird News Quiz. Let's see if you can do better
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Sorry, drivers, but we have to ask you to stop being so nice. It's dangerous. Sorry
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Life)
 
 
 
I accidentally slept with a Trump supporter. He had a cool motorcycle, ok? You understand
source: torontolife.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Samsung to remotely brick all remaining Note 7s. If you don't return it now, the next update will remotely detonate it
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Vintage News)
 
 
 
Mysterious device found all over Ancient Rome baffles everyone except Ancient Romans
source: thevintagenews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 19 Cincinnati)
 
 
 
PSA: Pork is not Muslim Kyptonite
source: fox19.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
56% of Trump voters say they won't believe news reports that say he's lying. In other news 44% of Trump voters lie to pollsters
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Kanye West comes out of hiding, sees shadow, which means six more weeks of douchebag behavior
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
A new Study finds that barely half of 30-year old are earning more than their parents were at the same age, as compared to 92% in 1970-and the number would be even worse except a lot fewer women worked back them
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Geert Wilders convicted of hate speech. Eyegore unavailable for comment
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
Brian Williams complains about fake news
source: dailycaller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark Shop)
 
 
 
Fark Store Daily Deal: Breda Valor Watch. Military-inspired, minimalist wristwatch. It's a watch. (Sponsored Link)
source: deals.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man spends over $30,000 to look like Captain America's nemesis, The Red Skull. If he had actually ever read a comic book he would have known that for most of the Skull's history, his red face was just a cheap-ass mask
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Austria's word of the year is so long, FARK would not accept it in this headline
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Arkansas court rules that two women can't be listed on a birth certificate even if they are sisters
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Ceasefire in Aleppo means continual bombing apparently
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this Christmas photo fail
source: 24warez.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Please excuse Parker for his absence as he was afflicted with a severe case of Hogwarts
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
17 goes into 32 one too many times
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 Atlanta)
 
 
 
Georgia family finds balloon sent by boy to his father in heaven as a Christmas letter. Now they need help to track him down and make his Christmas a merrier one
source: fox5atlanta.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Instead of going to the cops with the evidence, bar owners put security video of a customer stealing the tip jar on social media in hopes of guilting the culprit into returning the money. "We own a bar, people get a little intoxicated, stuff happens"
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Old and busted: Cow tipping. New Farkness: Wheelchair tipping
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
The most Canadian case of road rage and assault you'll ever see
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
If you ever had trouble choosing the burger or burrito, your problems have been solved. Behold the burgito
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Sure you walked uphill both ways to get to school, but did you ever go to school when it was bone-crushing minus 53C outside like these Siberian children?
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
Canada has decided to put the woman who fought segregation on the $10 bill. Hero tag for Ms. Desmond
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu December 08, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"The BBC was unable to verify the size of Olivio's behind"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
New app helps passengers get over their fear of flying. It's perfect for when the flight attendant refuses to give you the sixth mini-bottle of vodka
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Man converts child's Power Wheels car into a 40mph death trap
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Magnitude 6.5 Quake off the Coast of California; Nearby mayor: "It was not that bad. More like a giant Footsie Wootsie"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Give a man a fish, and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he will resort to piracy when work gets a little thin
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Cop DOESN'T shoot black guy, who actually HAS a gun, and gets fired
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kent Online)
 
 
 
Ex-Jehovah's Witness banned from every Kingdom Hall in the UK after launching a campaign of harassment against other members that included following them in the street and posting leaflets through their doors. Can't think where he got the ideas from
source: kentonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
UPS does it part to help keep Portland weird by having drivers make their deliveries using electric-assist tricycles
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
Grinches at MTA say SantaCon brings too much Christmas cheer
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Anyone can wreck a car. Doing it so spectacularly that they send a helicopter instead of a tow truck, that takes talent
source: truckyeah.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Russia, US close to reaching a ceasefire over Aleppo
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I got it from the BBC)
 
 
 
Photoshop this deluxe accommodations in the sky
source: ichef.bbci.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Heroin now kills more people than guns in America. USA USA USA
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSOCTV)
 
 
 
Defense attorneys ask for mistrial Thursday morning in Dylann Roof's trial, saying witnesses' remarks that he is "evil" and belongs in the "pit of hell" were inappropriate. Judge orders trial to continue
source: wsoctv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
No, Fisher-Price isn't selling a "Happy Hour Playset," but they should
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
What could possibly go wrong now that Artificial Intelligence has joined the hunt for aliens? (Some Not safe for work images on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Food Network)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Wondering what to cook this holiday season? Be it Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, New Years, or whichever reason you can come up with for a feast, share your festive foods for Farkers to fawn over
source: foodnetwork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
If you disappear with the large amount of cash your employer gave you to deposit in the bank, it's probably overkill to send your employer an email the next day informing him that you quit
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
There are certain times in life when it's essential to check an address carefully. Like when you deliver mail, when you register to vote, and when you demolish a house
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
PSA: Police do not find it funny or cool that you use a cigarette lighter that looks like a gun
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
NewsFlash
 
Godspeed, John Glenn. Screw you, 2016
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop the delivery of your mother's marital aid
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Coed)
 
 
 
Either The Walking Dead isn't paying their extras enough, or Myrtle Beach has a big zombie prostitute problem
source: coed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
1,100 lb woman set to fly to India to receive weight-loss surgery, will almost definitely sit next to you on a connecting flight
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Cubs win World Series. Trump wins Presidency. Now they discover dinosaurs had feathers. I have no idea what's going on in this world
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Bad: Mom discovers 11-year-old son has nude pictures on mobile phone. Fark: From 30-year-old male youth pastor at NC church
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Spirits Business)
 
 
 
These are the most bizarre items left behind during last year's Christmas party season, including a prosthetic leg and a stuffed otter
source: thespiritsbusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
NewsFlash
 
Earthquake hits off of the Solomon Islands. UPDATE: Strength downgraded to 7.8, all tsunami watches cancelled
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Are people without kids happier?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Commemorative signs to be placed at each end of the United States' longest continuous road, Route 20. So take a trip from Boston, MA to Newport, OR and hear the word "route" pronounced 37 different ways
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Bald man arrested for being head honcho of Rogaine theft ring
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
There really is no Islamic push to get rid of Peppa Pig, says the real Sheikh Shady
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LGBTQ Nation)
 
 
 
New research shows that up to 85 percent of gay people are possessed by ghosts. Fabulous ones, presumably
source: lgbtqnation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Congress: You have a legal right to post a negative review without fear of retaliation by the company or person reviewed
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Just in time for Trump's administration, U.S. life expectancy drops for the first time in decades. Perhaps sweet death will save you, after all
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"What an absolutely magical time to be alive. We're so excited, we plan to spend the rest of the afternoon scrolling through their Instagram and lusting over it." Is that about: A) Discovery of Bourbon trees, B) Poopless cats, C) Vegan fried chicken
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
It must suck when you're a bank robber hoping to get a catchy nickname from the cops but instead you're known as the 'Packing Pigeon Bandit' because you walk with your toes facing inwards
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
Robin Williams, Tupac arrested in Arizona with 114 pounds of pot
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Paula Broadwell asks why Petreaus is on the rise again and she doesn't even get a phone call
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Pope thread
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark Shop)
 
 
 
Fark Store Daily Deal: Cold Brew Coffee Maker. Self- contained, individual Japanese / Dutch style cold brew for coffee geeks. More flavors and less bitterness. Insert inappropriate "your mom" joke here. (Sponsored Link)
source: deals.fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Photoshop these women grabbing hold of some major wood
source: i2.cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Daily News)
 
 
 
L.A. is selling the naming rights to rail stations and rail lines. In other words, you can take the Amazon Santa Monica train to the Google station and switch over to the Pornhub valley express where pulling a train is no problem
source: dailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
It turns out cavemen didn't eat as many bronto burgers as previously thought
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Not to alarm anyone, but spiders have mastered the zigzag cross-stitch
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Cop fired for eating without getting proper permission. Yet if he had shot somebody he would have gotten paid time off
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Humanity owns 30 trillion tons of stuff
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Why back in the day when we had a hunger problem on the college campus we'd go out and kill a bear for the winter
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Arkansas Online)
 
 
 
Police say the same man broke into the same pharmacy four times in one month, using the same window to get inside. He was probably looking for his OCD medicine
source: arkansasonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
26 things the French find weird about America. If air conditioning and three liter bottles of wine are wrong, I don't want to be right
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Want to be hired? Don't be a douche
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
No, 12 hours is not a good time for a half-marathon
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
Having previously solved city traffic jams, China's futuristic "straddling bus" now just creates them
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 605: "Auto Detailing". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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