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Sat March 28, 2015
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Former Navy SEAL who was shot 27 times in one firefight will run in a half-Ironman representing Carrick Brain Centers. You'll be able to hear the clanking of giant balls and bullet fragments for miles around
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
This woman posed as a lawyer and almost became a partner at her small firm before her fraud was discovered. She would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for those meddling investigators
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Prisoner obtains mobile phone in jail, uses it to set up fake web domain to issue fake bail instructions and then escape. I mean, how often do you look at a man's bail instructions?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(CBS Sacramento)
 
 
 
So what is up with that piano on top of a hill, anyway?
source: sacramento.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Pizza and ice cream parlor was front for family-run pot operation, police rai... waidadaminnit... Why didn't I think of that?
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(MSN Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this underwater gal
source: img.s-msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
5'4", 125lb woman goes to doctor for back pain, is told to lose weight. Patient loses weight three months later, sues
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Greeneville Sun)
 
 
 
"Every one of them deserves a bowl of food and a blanket to sleep on." Woman single-handedly cares for almost 350 abandoned and feral cats. Please give her a very warm welcome to Caturday
source: greenevillesun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(496)
 
(Denver Post)
 
 
 
Colorado defends pot laws, Attorney General Cynthia Coffman urges Supreme Court to reject lawsuit filed by neighboring states: "This is an attempt to reach across their borders and selectively invalidate state laws with which they disagree"
source: denverpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(MyFox Twin Cities)
 
 
 
Honest to God, if you pass out at a party and wake up to find a bag of jewels next to you and the bag of jewels has a laptop in it, don't waste your time pawning the laptop
source: myfoxtwincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Four-year-old girl sneaks out of house at 3 in the morning, hops bus in search of slushie
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Dallas Observer)
 
 
 
If you're running for Mayor, you may want to refrain from spraying '666' grafitti on public buildings and landmarks
source: blogs.dallasobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 


Fri March 27, 2015
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Study finds that the most dangerous time to be home is 6:30pm on Saturdays and you're better off staying the hell away from the kitchen
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
A picture is worth a thousand words. More, if there's cocaine hidden in the frame
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
It's important to know the difference between clay and organic kitty litter. Especially if you're using it at a nuclear waste facility
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
On news that the Supreme Court of Canada has sided with the federal government to destroy records from the abolished gun registry, Quebec said, "Fine we'll start our own registry. With blackjack and hookers"
source: montreal.ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
There's driving drunk, and then there's 'passed out in the car while rolling down the freeway' drunk. (caught on video)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Japan Today)
 
 
 
Buddhist monk, 41, busted for seeking enlightenment and inner peace by filming upskirts of schoolgirls
source: japantoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Some Flat Packer)
 
 
 
To house Iraqi refugees, UN agency places IKEA order for 10,000 flat-pack shelters, 10,001 allen wrenches
source: irinnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Racist cupcakes? How bad could they .... WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? (Not safe for work)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(460)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop Theme: the perfect vacation
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Public Radio International)
 
 
 
Why are Canadians nicer than we are?
source: pri.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(208)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
Next up in RFRA debacle roulette. NFL 'studying implications' of Indiana religious freedom bill
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
The latest taste sensation from the land of the deep-fried Mars bar? Just in time for Easter it's the Cadbury's creme egg rolled in sweet chilli sausage meat and coated in breadcrumbs. Yum yum
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(LA Times)
 
NewsFlash
 
Amanda Knox, who was found guilty, not guilty, and guilty again, has now been found not guilty again. Prosecution demands an elimination trial to see who will take 3 out of 5
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(207)
 
(Daily Freeman)
 
 
 
No more calls, ladies and gentlemen - we have our Fark mugshot of the decade
source: dailyfreeman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Baby born with sqrt(666) / 2.15) on his forehead. Everbody PANIC
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
In order to save the endangered black rhino, the Dallas Safari Club auctioned off a permit to kill a black rhino
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(National Journal)
 
 
 
The TSA thinks you are a possible terrorist if you: yawn. blink, whistle or smell. Automatic trip to Gitmo if you do all four at once
source: nationaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Photoshop this hot spot
source: i.telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
This is why they're called heroes
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Get ready, it's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. And as this is Quiz #420, you can be mellow and take it at your own pace, man
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Virginia crowns new hide-and-seek champion
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built it all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Some would say it's a good start
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Uproxx)
 
 
 
Have you ever said to yourself "if only I could get paid to get drunk and surf the web"? This guy does
source: uproxx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Fark: Plant that provides 30,000 jobs in Ukraine cannot reopen if it is ever shut down. Holy Fark: 2,000 workers keep going back to work despite the plant having been shelled 160 times since July
source: uatoday.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
It was then that I saw a nine foot tall space alien chatting quietly to the astronauts
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Germanwings crash co-pilot and his girlfriend were having a "serious crisis in their relationship." Apparently mass murder was an available remedy
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(213)
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Meanwhile in Seattle, ten goats escaped a pen and chased after children. Seattle's finest was on the case
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Her ticket to hell has been upgraded to first-class. This 'mom' physically abused her baby, and faked cancer for people to show sympathy to her
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(WebMD)
 
 
 
Study finds that people with lower back pain who smoke, drink, are depressed or obese should make some lifestyle changes. Like starting with pretty much everything
source: webmd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Foodbeast)
 
 
 
McDonald's has built fast food's first "Bike-Thru Drive-Thru." As if their average customer could even ride a bike two blocks to get a Big Mac
source: foodbeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Woman teaches cat sign language. What kind of signs do you teach a cat? "Kneading chest" means "feed me" and "clawing eyes out" means "I love you". What more do you need?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Canadian veteran on disability tired of annual tradition of providing proof that his legs are still gone
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, at the Hall of Justice, prisoners are forced to fight each other for deputies amusement. The Superfriends aren't what they used to be
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Everyone calm the f*ck down about global warming, the geoengineering dudes have this one
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Criminal mastermind swallows drugs to avoid arrest, succeeds
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
A fierce legal battle with millions of dollars in royalties at stake has broken out over a 100+ year old song whose lyrics total only 16 words
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
Berkeley has an ambassador program to assist people with directions, keep the streets clean and such. Let's meet Ambassador Suckerpunch
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
NCAA: We don't know why you did this. If you want $$$ we can help. But if you want bigotry, we have locations other than Indiana. Locations that don't advertise bigotry. If you repeal, that will be the end of it. If not, we will take our $$$ and go
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(270)
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
If you're going to call a friend to bail you out of jail, make sure you call the one who isn't drunk
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Santa Rosa Press Democrat)
 
 
 
200 hens stolen from farm in Easter egg hunt gone awry
source: pressdemocrat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(The Weather Network)
 
 
 
Don't look now, but asteroid 2014-YB35 is set to make its closest approach to Earth today. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: theweathernetwork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Pilot tried to break back into cockpit with an axe. No idea where he was hiding that to get it through security
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(183)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Massive wave of "compassionate leave" requests have hit employers this week because of: A) grief over family killed in the GermanWings crash, B) family home with the flu, or C) Zayn Malik quitting One Direction
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
One in twenty students make it through college the old fashioned way
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(KSN Wichita)
 
 
 
School to special-needs student: You may be special, but you're not special enough to wear a varsity jacket
source: ksn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(300)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Whoa... Okay Mr. Crocodile, you can have my fish, there's plenty more in the sea"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Picture a house that just sold for 1.2 million dollars cash. Can you picture it? Good. Now click the link
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this man with sole
source: i2.web.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"11 tips for a happy" woman's world of wonder
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Wired)
 
 
 
You can't sell snow to Eskimos, but apparently selling sand to Arabs is a thing
source: wired.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
FW: FW: FW: fw: FW: FWD: FW: IT'S HAPPENINNNNG
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Penis-shaped property up for grabs (mildly Not safe for work)
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Aspen Times)
 
 
 
Colorado residents upset over pot stench from legal grow facility: "When you step outside, it's like you're stepping into a bag of weed"
source: aspentimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
South Miami Vice Mayor Walter Harris wants to be America's mohel
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(TreeHugger)
 
 
 
Spreading your seed is now illegal in many parts of this country
source: treehugger.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(134)
 
(KGW Portland)
 
 
 
Serial flasher suspect Michael Dick arrested for masturbating at Tickle Creek
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Shy in the restroom? This won't help
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
Kansas legislature sends bill to Governor Brownback that legalizes conceal carry without training or a permit
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(297)
 
(Grind TV)
 
 
 
Giant Manta Ray flips diver. He obviously went for "Tails"
source: grindtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
US District judge rules some married same-sex couples not eligible for FMLA leave, depending on what state they're working in. 14th Amendment surrenders
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Hundreds laid off across Canada as the CBC tries to cut costs. I'd post a CBC article but I think they're busy cleaning out their desks
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Woman charged with assault after squirting breast milk on police officer
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
In response to U.S. House measure encouraging shipment of U.S. weapons to Ukraine, Chechnya offers arms to Mexico to fight United States. AY CARAMBA
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Clearing your Internet browser's cache is enough to get you charged with obstructing an investigation. Sleep well citizens
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
Driver causes 5 car accident while making a U-Turn... on Interstate 5 in Seattle
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 

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