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Tue September 19, 2017
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Reuters)
 
 
 
A helicopter in Russia's totally not-a-cover-for-an-invasion war games just accidentally fired a live rocket at several parked civilian vehicles
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
Transgender Kindergarten Lesson is the name of my prog rock band
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Welcome to New York, Mr Prime Minister, you disgustingly handsome person. Here's your award
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Union Leader)
 
 
 
Large circle of mysterious and unidentifiable purple powder found on school property has baffled authorities, as security footage shows no one visiting the area
source: unionleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Survey McSurvFace)
 
 
 
Robert E. Lee High School in San Antonio is requesting the Internet's help in picking a new name.You know what to do
source: northeastisd.az1.qualtrics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(University of Oregon)
 
 
 
Photoshop these two blondes
source: blogs.uoregon.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Guy who climbed mountain only in his underwear develops hypothermia - which is French for "don't climb a farkin' mountain only in your underwear"
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Suicide by cop leads to three post suicide protest arrests
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Must be a day ending in "Y" as Fox News is sued, again, for sexual harassment
source: mobile.nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Alaska Dispatch News)
 
 
 
People of Alaska, we hope you are enjoying this year's Permanent Fund Dividend check worth $1,100. If the people you keep electing into office would just stop meddling, that check could have been worth $2,350
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Toys "Я" Bankrupt
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Mars research crew emerges after eight months in isolation; reads news, asks to be returned to isolation
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Police officers are not a disenfranchised minority
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
People in Switzerland want to know who is clogging their toilets with wads of cash
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(In Touch Weekly)
 
 
 
Come for an update on the now 27-year-old Hensel twins, stay for the completely unfounded speculation about their sex life. And by that we mean, abdicating facts to assume they skip guys for mutual incestuous conjoined lesbian masturbation (SFW)
source: intouchweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon September 18, 2017
(NOAA)
 
 
 
Come here, Maria. Here, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty
source: nhc.noaa.gov   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
Considering Florida's dismal power grid, being able to use solar power during outages could be very helpful. Naturally, Florida Power and Light lobbyists made exactly that illegal
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Not News: Man commits suicide. News: While sitting in his vehicle in parking structure of international airport. Fark: His body wasn't discovered until 8 months later
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Couple driving through northern Maine forced to stop in middle of road. (Lynx go nowhere)
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Few things qualify as more hoonigan than doing a burnout in a car being towed on a trailer
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Changes afoot for online advertising
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
I'd tap that
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Trump planning on copying Best Korea with a parade
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop what should be in this pot
source: homedepot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Dylann Roof wishes he had a white supremacist lawyer and not one of these horrible Jewish lawyers. How can I be declared innocent of killing a church full of black people with a Jewish lawyer? I need a creepy racist lawyer with a bowl cut
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Tonight at 8PM EDT, a special Paul's Memory Bank as I pay tribute to our beloved soosh by sampling some playlists from early in the year
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
OK, this is the Whole World. And this is us. No sir, we're not the whole world. These other thingies are other countries. No sir, we can't make them go away
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
After getting buzzed by North Korean missiles Japan's prime minister is looking to quickly rewrite their pacifist Constitution
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
Intoxicated wedding guests try to mingle with a bison herd. Darwin heard muttering "too easy"
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Mystery woman has been crashing every funeral at local church for 14 years just so she can stuff her face at the free buffet
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
WA father claims that he accidentally shot his son repeatedly with flaming balls from a "fireworks gun" in a "safety lesson" that went accidentally awry. His 6-year-old son tells a different, more believable, and frankly better-constructed story
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
This story of a slam poet and a stolen house gets weirder the further down you go
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gannett Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this flying man
source: gannett-cdn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Burglar jerks off after breaking in. In burglar circles this is known as a whack job
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
There's a time and place to take selfies and check your backpack, and it's not while A) Riding a motorcycle on a motorway; B) Practicing wheelies; C) Doing 117 mph; D) Being followed by the police; or E) Any or all of these
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Bill Gates thinks an outbreak of disease could kill 30 million people within the next 10 years. No word if he thinks it could come from a virus
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouCaring)
 
 
 
Donation info for Farker timujin's final expenses, link goes to fundraiser
source: youcaring.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Woman with a gun, threatening to shoot herself? Don't worry, the Florida Police are there to help with that
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2017-09-10 to Sat 2017-09-16
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Man helps himself to bacon from woman's plate. Surprisingly, she objects. Late-night hilarity at the Waffle House ensues
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Caption these construction workers
source: d6d2h4gfvy8t8.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
*Bark* Bark* "Hello, 911?" *Bark* *Bark* "This is 911, what is your emergency?" *Bark* *Bark*
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
Video
 
After harassing black passenger on bus, Seattle Nazi followed by bystanders and punched
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Snapchat blocks Al-Jazeera in Saudi Arabia. How will fearless reporters send dick pics to fundamentalist Muslims now?
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 10 Sacamento)
 
 
 
Big rig hauling 40,000 pounds of dog food overturns on freeway, spilling its contents. That's ruff
source: abc10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
Lexus goes "Hey, Kool-Aid!" on fourth floor parking garage wall. Oh, yeah!
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flickr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this magic mushroom
source: c1.staticflickr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHO TV Des Moines)
 
 
 
Swastika and racist message found on Drake. You'd think he'd have woken up during that
source: whotv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
RIP Stanislav Petrov, the man who saved the world
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Happy 308th birthday, What the Fark Am I Reading Guy
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
"Is there a Tulls here? Jenna Tulls? Hey everybody Show me Jenna Tulls"
source: compete.kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Sometimes it helps if you put up a link to the quiz once it's ready to go. It's the (very late) Fark Weekly Weird News Quiz, Sept. 3-9 Tangerine Edition
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
You, you, and your rabbit don't understand why all the voices are talking to me
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Now I know why; they're faster than I. I guess we'll die
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
"My life improved when I moved from a blue state to a red state," claims delusional woman
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
The cruise ship industry and US Govt. really missed the boat not coming to the people that were stranded in the Caribbean islands and Houston They could have helped dammit. No food or water doggonit . How does money work?
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Clearly, the smartest thing for insurance companies to do during an opioid crisis is to restrict access to less addictive and powerful drugs
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Detective has found no evidence that deputy coroner and cop had sex at death scene, but the remaining allegations are nearly as weird
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Connecticut)
 
 
 
Oreo unveils their newest flavor, Cookie Butter. Wait. What the hell is Cookie Butter? This literally makes no sense
source: nbcconnecticut.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Dear Farmers Insurance, We have another exhibit for our Hall of Claims
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Police to armed robbers of Boost Mobile: "Where you at?"
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Watch out, we got a badass over here. He's also depressing and 100% right
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

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