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Fri July 03, 2015
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
ISIS now sets its sights on Egypt's pyramids and sphinx. Mummy, I'm scared
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Grand Junction Daily Sentinel)
 
 
 
Marijuana-related expulsions skyrocket in Grand Junction, Colorado after marijuana legalization. Just kidding, they now have the lowest number of expulsions the school district has had in at least a decade
source: gjsentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
So, uh... researchers can't exactly track all of those collared wolves in Yellowstone right now because they kind of lost the licenses to those frequencies. Sleep tight
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Man walks into airport with $75k in a duffel bag. TSA reports seizing $70k "because reasons," tweets out picture of $65k, and turns $60k over to a random Federal agency because, again, reasons. Welcome to the Land of the Free
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Man frustrated with trying to get his dead wife's tax refund check says "Now, I know why people shoot up places like this." Well, that's one way to get a quick response from the IRS
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(10 News)
 
 
 
Residents in a California suburb conserved so much more water than expected that the city had to throw away the excess
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Dog saves Mount Dora family from fire, which was believed to have been started by a dastardly fox seeking revenge on the girl inside
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 


Thu July 02, 2015
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Girls, don't become like a sticky note that's been stuck to too many places and gets unsticky by getting stuck too often or you won't be able to stick by your man, because chemistry
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(KNBC 4 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Man goes to LAX in hopes of getting a CAT Scan
source: nbclosangeles.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Hurriyet Daily News)
 
 
 
So you want to be a counterfeiter. Do you fake: a) $100 bills, b) designer handbags, or c) popsicle sticks?
source: hurriyetdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
Burglary suspect appears before judge for bond hearing, who remembers him as her classmate from middle school (with video)
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Confessions of a submariner: "Forget The Hunt for Red October or Crimson Tide. If you want to know what it's like on a submarine, watch Down Periscope"
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
CNN reports that mass killings are contagious for about 13 days. Unsurprisingly, this is about the same length of time CNN covers these kinds of stories
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when you finally get around to checking your bills, and find out you owe fifty billion more than you thought?
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
First US death from measles in twelve years is a woman who had a weakened immune system. We can't blame the anti-vaxxers for certain, but we can connect the dots
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Despite his best efforts, Jim Carrey contributed something positive to autism awareness
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Shanghaiist)
 
 
 
After two years of trying to get his two black labs to fetch with no results, man finally realizes they're two black bears
source: shanghaiist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: A day at the beach
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Fox 4 Now)
 
 
 
Boring 5th of July ready headline: "Floridians urged to leave the fireworks to the professionals"
source: scrippsmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(9)
 
(KGW Portland)
 
 
 
Which is better, #1 or #2?
source: kgw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Dear Abby: I can't stop thinking about my boyfriend's threesome
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Some Ecards)
 
 
 
Reporter named Sarah O'Connor tweets about the VW factory robot killing a worker. Then epicness happens
source: happyplace.someecards.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
"You're fired and fark your hair, too"
source: national.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Good news, everybody -- Sarah Palin has solved California's drought crisis. "They should just build more reservoirs"
source: ifyouonlynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(216)
 
(Aero-News Newwork)
 
 
 
"Flying a drone" is a crime according to Officer Madeitup
source: aero-news.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Enjoy refreshing fruits this summer.. The Fark way. Show us how you cool down as you liquor up
source: howlatthemoon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Stitcher)
 
 
 
In this Farkcast, Drew talks about his autonomous cannon. Surprisingly, that is not a euphemism
source: stitcher.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Are you worried about your neighbor's gun collection? Try living next door to a German man with a tank
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
"What are you in for?" "Murder. You?" "I had a fake service dog"
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Flag-burning group Disarm The Police make a panicked call to their new best friends, the police
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(Sputnik News)
 
 
 
Photoshop these worker ants
source: cdn1.img.sputniknews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Nautil.us)
 
 
 
What you should know about your body's biggest organ. No, not that one
source: nautil.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Editorial staff at Salon.com have voted to unionize. A move that is sure to mirror the success of America's auto industry
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Chris Christie says his temper is the result of "controlled anger." Just like his girth is a result of his "disciplined appetite"
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Scientists say they will be able to work out when Yellowstone is going to erupt again at least 10 months before it happens. Which is plenty of time to pack up and start a new life on another planet
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Slightly disbelieving that they actually have to say this, the TSA would like to remind everyone travelling this 3th of July Holiday, that no, you may NOT pack fireworks in your luggage, yes, even the lame ones like sparklers
source: gma.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Which one of these sentences probably should've been kept out of a 3-year-old boy's obituary? c.) "His uncle Charlie taught him how to keep that pimp hand strong"
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(121)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
THIS JUST IN: The Lock Ness UFO has been debunked - Nessie unavailable for comment
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Dylan Roof's enterprising sister wants you all to pay for her wedding because her stupid brother RUINED EVERYTHING. She will, however, generously give 10% to the church her brother shot up
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(409)
 
(Fox 4 Now)
 
 
 
Movie theater defends having sexy 'Magic Mike XXL' party where kids are coming to watch 'Inside Out' by saying it was only happening "for a couple of hours"
source: scrippsmedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Why isn't the middle class earning $156,000?
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(181)
 
(Express Tribune (Pakistan))
 
 
 
Robots violate first law. World conquest soon to follow
source: tribune.com.pk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Here are words that can't be resisted so yes it is clickbait. C'mon, you know you want to click to see what they are
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(WUSA9)
 
 
 
Pope Francis will meet with prisoners, immigrants and the homeless on his U.S. visit. Apparently he's going to spend some time in Los Angeles
source: wusa9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Digital Spy)
 
 
 
BBC issues statement responding to the 44 complaints it received over the Kanye West Glastonbury broadcast: "We issued a warning it was possible to be offended by not only his foul language, but the horribleness of what he calls singing"
source: digitalspy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Hawaii state rep, who goes around smashing homeless peoples' shopping carts with sledge hammer, gets beatdown from homeless guys he was harassing
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(229)
 
(Addicting Info)
 
 
 
"The Sioux Falls resident apparently believes that if she were to marry her dog this would prove that gay marriage is wrong, although you would be hard pressed to figure out how"
source: addictinginfo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Science explains why you always forget where you parked your car, moron
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
The definition of chutzpah: Americans build giant robot, challenge Japan to a duel
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Time)
 
 
 
It took her 44 years, but Sonia Manzano is leaving Sesame Street. Hopefully she'll come back for Bert & Ernie's wedding
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(Phys Org2)
 
 
 
Scientists on aliens: "Something does not add up, and badly. We should not be alone, but we are"
source: phys.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(308)
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Baltimore police will now have to figure out a new way to rough up suspects without being caught on camera. Police transport vans are out
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Some Rich CVS Owner)
 
 
 
Baltimore man arrested as suspect in fire in Baltimore CVS store, but the real story is that the Police Commissioner said the fire caused "over $1 billion in damage to the store and its contents." Did their Gold Bond really contain gold?
source: thetimesgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
One third of Americans, mostly white men over 55, own guns. In other news, a third of America is still white
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(287)
 
(From the Grapevine)
 
 
 
A hot, dusty, cluster of stars discovered. Somebody tell them where the Playboy Grotto can be found
source: fromthegrapevine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this domesticated dino
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Maybe you shouldn't put the "GRAPHIC WARNING" caption BELOW the picture you are warning people about. (Graphic Warning: Article includes picture of deceased prison escapee)
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(USA Today)
 
NewsFlash
 
Reports of shooter at Washington Naval Yard. This is not a repeat of 2 years ago
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(294)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Mysterious amnesia woman in CA finally identified and reunited with family
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Do NOT get high on marijuana and go to Burger King. Especially with your 5-month-old baby (w/mugshots)
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Flipper flips out
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
KKK: 'We are going to stage a march in support of the Confederate Battle Flag." Sons of Confederate Veterans: "Thanks, but we're good. We've got this"
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(223)
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
The most patriotic states: Virginia, Washington and Colorado. The least patriotic: Rhode Island, New Jersey and New York
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
DJ for kid parties arrested on sex charges. In other news, since when did kid parties start having DJs?
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
If only there had been some convenient remedy he could have employed to keep the shark from capsizing his small craft. Perhaps a larger manner of conveyance might have been in order
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Apparently the pilot in the deadly TransAsia Airlines plane that crashed into a river earlier this year picked the wrong time to ask for the fish dish when picking engines to throttle
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(AccuWeather)
 
 
 
Because of this whole drought thing, some communities in California won't let you light fireworks this 4th of July
source: accuweather.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
The War on Christianity heats up as the Episcopal Church votes to allow same sex couples to marry in their churches
source: america.aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Ever get that gnawing feeling that something in the apartment is wrong?
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
I'm not sure what's worse. That Allegiant Airlines thinks unaccompanied minors are baggage or that a Florida 15 year old doesn't have enough common sense to handle a flight delay
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Don't post a picture on social media of a woman pushing a 1-year-old in a stroller while carrying a 5-year-old in a baby carrier if you value your job
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(82)
 
(Billings Gazette)
 
 
 
Man applies to have two mothers-in-law. YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG or just padding your case for a possible future insanity plea
source: billingsgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(ABC 27)
 
 
 
Pro-tip: When you plan to rob a bank after you get out of prison, don't rob the same one you robbed years ago
source: abc27.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
What a tool
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Archeologists discover Iron Age warrior lived even after an arrow was shot into his spine. You don't fark with Iron Age warriors, and some archer figured that out 2,600 years ago
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(KVAL Eugene)
 
 
 
Four juveniles have been identified and charged for their involvement in the Eugene Civic Stadium fire
source: kval.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(My San Antonio)
 
 
 
Try to rob a former CNN anchor in her motel room? That's a shooting
source: mysanantonio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
What's worse than an ear worm?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 530: "Contrast and Deep Shadows" Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 

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